He couldn’t let them take him. Refused to be locked up for the rest of his days. Suffering a few minutes’ more of agony was far better than what he’d have to endure if he allowed them to take him alive.
Staring at the knife handle, Rahim battled through the haze of agony and gathered his remaining strength. In one last, desperate move, he grabbed it and tore it out of his body before Sandberg could stop him, tearing it sideways to slash through his bowel and as many arteries as possible.
“You fucking crazy bastard,” Sandberg snarled, immediately pressing both hands to the wound and pressing down with his body weight to slow the bleeding.
The gesture was futile, and they both knew it.
Blood pulsed out from beneath the restraining hands. Already he could feel his body growing cold, weak. He didn’t have enough strength to shove Sandberg overboard. A chilling fear began to take hold. He’d failed to kill Sandberg and now he was dying, before the bomb could go off.
As his mind floated he heard Sandberg snapping orders to the others, asking for paramedics and an airlift to the hospital. The pressure on his abdomen remained solid, and he jerked when strong fingers gripped his jaw, forced his gaze upward. Sandberg’s bottomless brown eyes stared down into his. “Where,” he pleaded. “Just tell me where, damn you.”
His answering laugh turned into a pained wheeze and he let his eyelids drift shut. “Never.”
Sandberg cursed and issued more orders. Running footsteps. Urgent voices. Someone tearing open his shirt and pulling away the tactical vest. He barely felt the cool air washing over his bare skin, too immersed in the pain to care.
A hard hand gripped his jaw again. “
Gary
. You look at me, goddammit.”
His eyes snapped open to find Sandberg still there above him, dark eyes boring into his, willing him to live.
Gary
. The name and identity he’d abandoned when he’d crawled his way out of that pit and into the light. Hatred and resentment swelled, enough to override the pain. “My name…is
Rahim
,” he rasped, shaking all over. The paramedic next to him had the defibrillator ready. His heart would fail soon. Only a few more minutes…
He didn’t know how much time passed before Sandberg sucked in a sharp breath and his head snapped up. “
What
?” The word came out strangled, his face paling beneath the dark stubble as he stared toward the dock. Then his eyes snapped to Rahim’s, full of horror and disbelief.
And in that instant, he knew.
A slow, satisfied smile spread across Rahim’s face. He wanted to laugh in joy but didn’t have the strength. “I…win,” he whispered. Victorious, despite their every effort to prevent it.
Cold swept through him in an arctic blast, obliterating the temporary warmth of victory. His heart lurched then stilled. He felt his eyes bulge, his mouth opening as his throat worked, desperate for air. As though from a great distance he heard the urgent voices around him, felt the paddles placed on his chest. In that last moment of consciousness he stared up at the clouds, where his spirit would soon soar to meet the God he’d served with such devotion.
“You’re gonna wear out your lip, doing that.”
Realizing she was biting her lower lip again, Erin glanced up from the dial of the sphygmomanometer and offered a guilty smile at Schafer. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be. Was just an observation.”
She squeezed the bulb to re-inflate the blood pressure cuff and went back to studying the gauge. A few moments later she pulled her stethoscope from her ears and draped it around the back of her neck. “One-oh-five over sixty,” she said, tearing the Velcro apart and removing the cuff.
He looked pleased about that as he sat up, albeit gingerly and with a wince as he put a hand over the bandage on his side. “Not bad, considering I’ve got a hole in my chest and a lot less blood than I had a couple hours ago.”
“Yeah, but you should still be lying down.”
“Nah. Besides, it hurts less when I’m upright.”
She bent to peel the edges of the tape away from the bandage covering his right side. “Sutures are still holding nicely.” She straightened and smoothed the tape back into place. “Just don’t overdo it, okay?”
He gave her a devilishly charming smile that made his blue eyes sparkle. “Okay.”
Though she doubted he’d do what he was told—she’d learned long ago that alpha males were the very worst patients in the entire world for compliance—she nodded and set her hands on her hips with a sigh. “Now what?” His vitals were all surprisingly good and there was nothing else she could do for him. Someone had escorted them both to the medical area here at headquarters after Schafer had given his official statement in the conference room earlier. Since then they’d been stuck in here while Schafer had rested and she’d checked his vitals every half hour.
“Might as well sit down and make yourself comfy,” he said.
She couldn’t sit—she’d explode. It’d been over two hours since Wade had left her outside Robert’s office. No one had told her anything, except to say they’d update her when they could. Meaning they weren’t going to tell her anything until it was all over. She understood why, she just didn’t like it. Cooped up here and worrying about Wade heading into a deadly situation was slowly driving her insane.
She dragged a hand over her face, fighting back the memories of losing David that kept slamming into her brain. But no matter how much she told herself that this time would be different, she couldn’t shake the sick, helpless feeling inside her that she’d never see Wade again.
“Hey. Come on and sit down over here,” Schafer coaxed, patting part of the cushioned table next to him.
Giving in, she scooted up beside him and idly swung her feet back and forth.
“So how long have you known Wade?”
She glanced up at him in surprise. “Not that long. Why?”
He shrugged, winced as it pulled at his wound. “Never seen him like this with a woman, that’s all.”
She frowned. “Like what?”
He met her gaze. “He’s seriously into you, in case you hadn’t noticed.”
She’d noticed. She was still tingling inside from the urgent tone in his voice when he’d told her he’d fallen for her, and hoping there was more to it. “Yeah, well, I’m seriously into him too.”
Schafer’s dark eyebrows rose. “So, how long have you known each other?”
“Less than a week, actually.”
He let out a low whistle. “Wow, that’s…wow.” Then he chuckled as though he found that incredibly amusing.
She frowned harder, feeling suddenly defensive. “I know it’s fast and maybe it sounds unbelievable, but it’s what I feel.”
He held up a hand. “Hey, not bashing you for it. Just never thought I’d see the day when Wade went all territorial alpha over a woman, that’s all. Pretty cool to watch it happen, to tell you the truth. I know how fast it can happen.” His wide shoulders moved in a shrug. “My wife and I met at a wedding and eloped three weeks later.”
She smiled, glad he wasn’t judging her and that he was providing her with a badly needed distraction. “Really?”
He nodded. “My friends and family thought we were insane. This line of work is hell on marriages, but it’s been nine years and we’re still together. Our daughter turns seven this year. I’d been planning to make a point to be home more and cutting my overseas time starting next month. This just pushed the timeline up, is all.” He nodded toward his bandaged side.
She loved how his whole face softened when he talked about his family. “I love hearing that.” Because if she and Wade made a go of things after this, they’d be facing a lengthy separation almost right away, and God knew where Wade would land up after this op or what he’d wind up doing in terms of his career once this was all over. Certainly undercover work in the Middle East was out for him after this deadly drama with Rahim.
He’s coming back, Erin.
He had to come back. She couldn’t go through that again, and what she felt for Wade was already way more intense than what she’d felt for David. Swallowing, she changed the subject. “What about you, how long have you known Wade?” She knew their relationship hadn’t exactly been easy over the past few years, but she was still curious. Wade thought enough of him that he’d believed Schafer’s innocence, and he’d risked his life to get him to safety.
“We met during SF selection,” Schafer said, shifting a little on the table. “We were close, but we had a solid rivalry going. Somewhere along the way it went from friendly to not so friendly.” He stared at the opposite wall as he spoke, as though he was lost in memory. “I don’t know what he’s told you about me, but I wasn’t always an asshole.”
“Well, no, not if you used to be friends,” she teased, nudging him lightly with her shoulder, careful not to jar him.
A half-smile curved his mouth. “We used to one-up each other every chance we got, but on a mission we were tight. Real tight,” he added, an almost wistful note to his voice. “It was afterward, when we got out of the Army and started contract work that it all turned to shit.”
Erin stayed quiet, not wanting to interrupt him. She was curious to hear Shafer’s version of it, see if it meshed with what Wade had told her.
“There was this one night mission in the tribal region. We got in a tight spot. I was team leader on that security detail and I…made the wrong call. Guys died. The client, two of our guys. Others were badly injured. Wade took over and got us out. I resented the hell out of him for that later.” He paused, a muscle flexing in his jaw. “It took me a long time to admit what I knew deep down was the truth—I’d screwed up. I didn’t want to have those guys’ deaths and injuries on my conscience, but yup, the fault lies with me and no one else. If Wade hadn’t gotten us out we’d have all died out there that night.” He looked down at his hands, clenched tight around the edge of the table. “I’m gonna tell him that when he gets back. It’s long overdue.”
Erin looked away and swallowed, fear thickening her throat. Wade was out there right now risking his life to bring Rahim in.
Please let him stay safe.
She glanced up at Schafer when he laid a hand over hers, the comforting gesture taking her by surprise.
His face was solemn. “He’s good. As good as operators get. He’s so fucking talented, Erin, and in so many ways I could puke from jealousy.” He smiled when she laughed at that, but then his expression sobered. “He knows what he’s doing, and he’ll be watching out for himself. He’s gonna do everything he can to do this and get out of there.”
Yes, and Rahim was also the most lethal enemy Wade had ever faced. The whole situation was emotionally intense for him. She hated that he was the one being forced to draw Rahim out. “But he won’t let this go until it’s over, one way or another.” She knew it without a doubt. It was what he wanted, needed, what he’d worked for so hard and so long.
Schafer conceded the point with a nod. “Yeah. But you wouldn’t want him to be any other way.”
No, she wouldn’t, Erin realized. She’d seen that steely, honorable core in him almost right away, and it was a big reason why she’d fallen so hard and so fast for him. She drew in a deep breath, let it out slowly. “You’re right.”
“I know,” he said, and she couldn’t help but smile at his smug tone.
“Thanks, Schafer. I appreciate you talking me down from the ledge. It’s just that I…lost someone a few years ago who meant a lot to me. The situation was totally different, but he was a soldier too, and he didn’t come back.”
“I’m sorry.”
She lowered her gaze. “Thanks.” Expelling a breath, she looked over at him and offered a smile. “When this is over and you’re healed up more, I think you, Wade and I should have a night on the town together. For old times’ sake. And new ones.”
His eyes warmed as he smiled at her. “I’d like that. And I’ve already told you three hundred times, call me Brady.”
“Fine, Brady it is. So, since you seem up to it, wanna make that call to your wife now?”
“
Love
to,” he said, his expression earnest.
Happy to give him at least this, Erin slid off the exam table and handed him her cell phone that they’d already received clearance to use. She pointed her thumb over her shoulder at the door. “I’ll just…”
“Thanks.”
“I’m gonna grab something to eat.” The thought of food wasn’t appealing when she was so worried but she hadn’t eaten since last night. “You want anything?”
He paused in the midst of dialing the number. “Sure, whatever you’re having would be awesome. Appreciate it.”
“No worries.” Pulling the door shut behind her, she headed down the brightly lit hallway to a coffee bar she’d seen earlier. It only reminded her of when she’d found Wade standing puzzled in front of one upstairs, and when she’d poured him a cup in the safe house kitchen. A sudden lump lodged in her throat.
Deep breath, Erin. He’s gonna be fine
.
She was a third of the way down the brightly lit hallway when a loud roar shattered the silence and the world suddenly exploded around her.
****
Wade straightened on his knees and stared out at the dock, his whole body rigid with denial at Robert’s unexpected announcement over the team earpieces.
The bomb had detonated. Where?
Erin.
His heart had shot up so hard and tight in his throat it felt like he was choking on it. Rahim would have chosen an important target, one that would make the biggest statement and have the biggest impact. A government building maybe, or something strategically important. Had the bomb gone off anywhere near her location? Had the radioactive material contaminated anything, and was she in the fallout zone? Next to him the paramedics were using the defibrillator again but he knew Rahim only had seconds left, his half-closed blue eyes already staring sightlessly up at the leaden sky.
Too late. You’re too late to stop any of it now
.
He’d failed on every level. He hadn’t been able to bring Rahim in alive or find out the bomb’s location or intended target.
Closing his eyes, Wade dropped his head and exhaled a ragged breath as a crushing sense of defeat slammed into him.