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Authors: Susan Mallery

Tags: #Fiction, #Contemporary Women

“Hi,” she said as she pulled up an empty chair. “Have you ordered?”

“Not yet,” her father said. “We were waiting to get a recommendation from the chef.”

Emily leaned close. “This place is terrific. Fabulous view. Did we know you were working with your ex-husband?”

“Oh, you saw Cal?” she asked, hoping to sound friendly and calm, not at all as if she’d spent a fair amount of the afternoon naked and begging for more.

“She told us,” her mother said. “I’m sure I mentioned it.” Fay glanced at him and waved. “I always thought it was a shame the two of you couldn’t work things out. Any sparks?”

“Not really,” Penny said, and hoped her mother had lost the ability to tell when she was lying.

Julie shook her head. “Let it go, Mom. Penny’s moved on, obviously. She’s having a baby on her own. She’s the perfect modern woman.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Penny said, although she appreciated the vote of confidence.

“Speaking of the baby,” her mother said. “Are you sure you’d still like me to come out for a couple of weeks when it’s born? I don’t want to intrude or get in the way or—”

“Yes,” Penny said, cutting her off in midsentence. “I would love the help. I’m terrified of being on my own with the baby.”

Her mother beamed at her. “You’ll be fine, but I’m happy to help. We’ll work out the details later. Now let’s order some food.”

Penny made several suggestions, then excused herself to go back to the kitchen. Her mother rose and walked with her.

“You’ve done a wonderful job here, darling,” Fay said. “We’re all so proud and happy for you.”

“Thanks. It’s nice to hear. Especially after all the years I spent screwing up.”

Fay frowned. “Don’t say that. We never thought of it that way. You were trying to find what was right for you, that’s all.”

“But I flunked out of college. Twice. And let me tell you, it’s hard to flunk out of community college.”

“You refused to settle. Your father and I always admired that about you.”

“Really?”

“Of course. All I’ve ever wanted was for my girls to be happy. You’ve made that happen. Oh, Emily and Julie did, too, but in a more traditional way. They knew what to expect from their lives. You never did. You forged your own path. That takes courage.”

Until that moment, Penny had always assumed her parents saw her as a failure. That they’d been disappointed in her stops and starts along the road of figuring out what she wanted to do with her life.

“Thanks, Mom,” she said and kissed the other woman on the cheek. “You’re the best.”

Her mother laughed. “All I ask is a chance to taste your cooking.”

“I promise.”

Fay returned to the table. Penny continued toward the kitchen, only to be intercepted by Cal.

“Your folks are here.”

“I know. Sorry. I forgot to tell you.” She stared at his face, liking the way the light played on his features. “Hi.”

“Hi, yourself. How are you feeling?”

“As if I could sing opera,” she said with a smile. “You?”

“Pretty damned good.” He jerked his head toward the table with her family. “Okay for me to go over and say hello? Or would that be too awkward?”

“I think it would be fine. They always liked you.”

“Good. Then I’ll do that.” He brushed his fingertips down her arm. “Maybe we can get together later?”

“I’d like that.”

She walked into the kitchen only to find Naomi standing in the middle of the room with her hands on her hips.

“What?” Penny asked.

Naomi grabbed her and pulled her into her office. “I saw that,” she said. “The whole thing. The intimate conversation. The private touches. There’s something going on with you and Cal.”

“No, there isn’t. Well, maybe. Something. But it’s no big deal.” If she didn’t count being in love with him. Then it was practically nothing.

“And?” Naomi demanded.

“And, what? I went with him to see his daughter. He decided not to tell Lindsey who he is. It was hard for him. I saw the whole thing and it made me…”

“Yes?”

“It made me like him.”

“Ha. As if that’s all that’s going on between you. I know there’s more, but I’m not sure I’m up to the details. Just be sure this time.”

“What?”

Naomi sighed. “Be sure. Last time you left. You shouldn’t leave. It’s wrong and it hurts the people left behind.”

The unfair accusation stunned her. “I didn’t leave. Okay, technically I did move out, but that was only because Cal didn’t care. He’s admitted so himself. He didn’t love me.”

“You didn’t fight for him.” Naomi held up a hand. “Look, I’m sorry. You don’t need this from me and I’m hardly in any position to judge. I’m the queen of running away.”

Penny was having a hard time getting her head around the conversation. “I didn’t run from Cal.”

“Yes, you did. And that’s okay. I’m just saying that before you start something up again, you need to know if you’re in it for the long haul.”

Naomi returned to the kitchen, leaving Penny speechless and annoyed.

She hadn’t run. Cal had disappeared emotionally long before she’d moved out. The problems in their marriage weren’t about her. Were they?

As she walked to the door a voice in her head pointed out that it took two to make or break any relationship. That no one person was all in the wrong or all in the right. That maybe, just maybe, she had some culpability in what had gone wrong.

 

D
ANI HATED EVERYTHING
about Gloria’s office. The size, the whiteness of it all. Being here always made her feel as if she’d been called to the principal’s office, even when she’d been the one to request the meeting.

It was seven-thirty on a Saturday night. Most people were at home with family or out on dates or with friends. Not her grandmother. Gloria was at the office and if Dani wanted to talk to her, that was where she had to be, too.

“You may go in now,” her secretary said, holding open the door to the inner sanctum.

Dani smiled at the woman, one of two secretaries Gloria employed. Her hours were such that one assistant simply wasn’t enough.

“Dani,” Gloria said from behind her very large, very white desk. “How nice of you to ask to see me.”

Gloria didn’t stand or offer to shake hands or hug. Not at the office. Here things were strictly business. Here they were never family.

“I took the liberty of going over the numbers at Burger Heaven,” Gloria continued as she motioned to the chair opposite her desk. “They look good. So I don’t think there’s a problem there, is there?”

“No.”

Dani had dressed carefully in a pantsuit with a silk blouse. She kept her back straight as she perched at the edge of the chair.

“Burger Heaven is doing well,” she said. “Which is why I wanted to see you. I’ve served my time there, Gloria. There’s nothing left for me to learn. I’m ready to move up in the company.”

Gloria sighed. “You’ve said that before, Dani. Several times. No matter how I discourage you, you keep insisting on wanting to move up. Why is that?”

“Because I’ve earned the chance to prove myself somewhere else.” She swallowed, then braced herself. “I either want to be promoted within the company or I’m resigning.”

Gloria didn’t react at all. Not a lash flickered, not a muscle moved. She regarded Dani for several seconds before saying, “I will not tolerate being threatened by you, young lady.”

Dani ignored the young lady bit. “I’m not threatening you. I’m stating a fact. I have both the education and experience to take on more responsibility. This is my career and I refuse to spend it managing Burger Heaven. If you don’t want to give me a chance, then I’ll find a company that does.”

“I doubt you’ll find many,” Gloria said with a sniff.

Dani ignored the hurt that jabbed her. She’d known this was going to go badly. She had to remember why she was here and stay on topic.

“I disagree,” she said. “My employment record and accomplishments speak for themselves. I won’t have any trouble finding another job and moving up. We both know that. So why do you have a problem with me? Why are you always treating me as if I’m second best? Is it because I’m a woman? I can’t believe that of you. You’re a woman and look what you’ve accomplished.”

“You’re right,” Gloria told her, a flicker of anger in her eyes. “
I
have brought this company to greatness.
I
am responsible for our success. Don’t you dare come to me with your stupid request—”

“It’s not stupid. It’s reasonable. You haven’t held anyone back the way you’ve kept me down. So why?”

Her grandmother leaned toward her. The air seemed to dip ten degrees. “Be very careful before you ask me that,” she said, her voice low. “I don’t think you’re prepared to hear the truth.”

“I think I’m up to it, Gloria,” she said, suddenly not the least bit afraid. After all, what could the woman say?

“All right. But when I’ve told you, don’t come crying to me, saying it’s all too much.”

“Sure. Whatever.” Talk about a love of melodrama.

Gloria leaned back in her chair. “Many years ago, before you were born, your mother took up with a man. She was unfaithful to my son. My son. Their affair continued for several years and produced a child—you, Danielle. You are your mother’s bastard and not a Buchanan at all. I kept quiet to spare my son the shame. But I’ve never forgotten. Every time I look at you, I see proof that bitch betrayed my son. You are your mother’s daughter and you are nothing to me.”

Dani heard the words, but they didn’t make sense. They couldn’t. Not a Buchanan? But she had always been a Buchanan.

“You’re lying,” she said.

“I am not, but if it would make you happy, we could have one of those DNA tests done. I’m confident it will show you are not one of us.”

Dani didn’t remember standing, but suddenly she was by the door.

“Burger Heaven is as much as you deserve,” Gloria told her. “Be grateful I let you have that much.”

Funny how an hour ago Dani had thought her life couldn’t get any worse. Obviously, she’d been wrong.

“You can have it back,” she told her grandmother. “I quit.”

“You can’t.”

“Of course I can. If I’m a bitch like my mother, I can do any damn thing I please.”

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

P
ENNY WALKED OUT
of the kitchen just ahead of the desserts. As she crossed the dining room toward her family’s table, they all stood and began to clap.

Stunned, she froze in place.

“My daughter is the chef,” her father said loudly to the other patrons. “Wasn’t your meal great?”

To her astonishment, everyone else stood and began applauding. She glanced around at the smiling faces and didn’t have a clue as to what she should do now.

The door to the kitchen opened. Penny turned toward it, hoping for a rescue or a reason to escape. Instead Naomi appeared with most of the kitchen staff. They started clapping, too. Cal came out last. He walked over to Penny and stood next to her.

“Did I hire the right person or what?” he asked. Everyone laughed.

Servers appeared with glasses of champagne.

“Didn’t we recently do the toast thing?” she whispered to him.

“That was about the success of the restaurant,” he said. “This is about you. Smile and drink your club soda.”

She took the glass he handed to her and waited until everyone had been served.

“To Penny,” Cal said.

“To Penny,” echoed the crowd.

Fifteen minutes later, when order had been restored to the dining room, Penny went looking for Cal and found him in his office.

“That was surreal,” she said. “Did you plan it?”

“No. Naomi came into the kitchen and said that you were getting a standing ovation in the dining room and I said to break out the champagne. You should be proud of what you’ve accomplished.”

“I am,” she said. “But I never expected a reaction like that.” She sat down. “When I spoke with my mom earlier, I mentioned that she and my dad must be happy that I finally figured out what I want to be when I grow up. I thought they were disappointed that I went from career to career, flunked out of college. All that stuff. But she said she was glad I’d taken the time to really figure out what I wanted to do. She liked that I didn’t settle.”

“So they surprised you in a good way.”

“It’s more than that. Their opinion of me was never what I thought it was and it never occurred to me to ask. I guess I didn’t want my worst fears confirmed. I made a lot of assumptions.”

“You know what they say about that.”

She wrinkled her nose. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that. My point is, what else was I wrong about?”

“Maybe nothing.”

Or maybe everything. She’d been so sure that leaving Cal had been the right thing to do. She’d been so sure she knew everything about him. Now she was beginning to feel she knew nothing about anyone.

“Did I run away from our marriage?” she asked.

He shrugged. “A case could be made for that, but I sure as hell didn’t come after you. There was so much crap going on back then, Penny. We were both struggling to make sense of things. I should have told you about Lindsey.”

She considered that. “The information would have made a big difference.”

“But would it have changed the outcome? Back then I couldn’t imagine ever being ready to have another child.”

And now?
On the one hand she knew that he was a different man—that he’d changed and grown. On the other, he’d admitted to never really loving her during their marriage.

“We couldn’t seem to find common ground,” he said. “I wanted to protect you. You didn’t think you needed it and saw my actions as walking all over your dreams.”

“Because you didn’t help me get the job at Buchanan’s.”

“I’m sorry about that,” he said.

“It’s okay. I understand now what you were doing.”

“But you didn’t back then. I hurt you and I never wanted to do that. I’m sorry.” He’d obviously cared. So why not love? Had he been afraid?

Her heart swelled, making her chest ache. “I’m sorry, too,” she whispered.

They’d had so much and then they’d lost it. If only they could have talked back then.

Or was this the way it was supposed to be? Did they need a chance to grow and change to find themselves at this point in time?

Naomi stuck her head in the office. “Sorry to interrupt, but the kitchen’s on fire.”

Penny scrambled to her feet. “You’re kidding, right?”

“Not really.”

Cal followed her. They walked into a smoke-filled kitchen.

“Just some grease,” Edouard said, fanning the air. “It’s out now.”

The printer kicked to life, spitting out several more orders.

“Can we get back to business?” she asked. “Is it manageable or do I need to kick someone’s ass?”

“We’re good,” Edouard said.

Cal’s cell phone rang. He flipped it open and said, “Hello.”

Penny went around the counter to deal with the residual cleanup from the fire. One of their pans was misshapen and two dinners had been ruined, but the flames were out and the vent system made short work of the smoke.

“Are these dinners at different tables?”

They would be. That was always the way, but a girl could hope.

Naomi confirmed the bad news.

“Get them up and cooking,” Penny called. “These are our priority, people.” She turned to say something to Edouard when she noticed Cal hanging up.

“What happened?” she asked as she took in his worried expression. “Is Lindsey okay?”

“What? Oh, she’s fine. That was Dani. She needs me to come by after work. Something happened. She sounded upset, but she won’t say what.”

One of the servers came into the kitchen. “Um, Penny? Your family is leaving. They’d like a chance to say goodbye.”

Cal touched her arm. “There’s nothing we can do now. I’ll come get you before I leave, then we’ll go over to your place together.”

“No. I think this is a family matter. I’ll stay here until you’ve talked to her. Then you can call and give me the all clear.”

“It’s not that big a deal.”

“You don’t know that, Cal. If Dani had wanted me there, she would have asked. I’ll stay here.”

While part of her brain processed details like the number of customers and orders yet to be filled, the rest of her mind turned over the problem of Cal.

Had she left their marriage too soon? If she’d stayed, could they have learned their lessons—him to give with his whole heart, her to believe he wanted her to succeed? They’d come a long way. If only he would love her—really love her.

Was it possible, or was she just wishing for the moon?

 

C
AL PARKED
behind Reid’s car and an unfamiliar truck he figured had to belong to Walker. Which meant Dani had called a family meeting. Maybe Penny had been right—this looked serious.

As he climbed out of the car, he wondered if Hugh had dropped another bombshell. If so, wheelchair or not, Cal was going to have to beat the crap out of the man.

He walked up to Penny’s front door, which opened before he could knock.

Reid greeted him. “Good. She wouldn’t say anything until we were all together. Why do I know Hugh just won bastard of the year?”

“That’s what I’m thinking, too. If so, we’ll take care of it.”

“You got that right.”

They walked into the living room, where Walker sat on the sofa. Dani stood by the small fireplace. She had a drink in her hand and a look of stark pain in her eyes.

He crossed to her. “Dani, what’s wrong?”

When he went to hold her, she sidestepped his embrace.

“Get yourself something to drink and have a seat,” she said.

“Dani?”

She shook her head. “You can’t fix this with a hug, Cal. Just get a drink. Please.”

Reid walked into the living room and handed him a beer. The two of them joined Walker on the sofa.

Dani faced them. “I went to see Gloria. I wanted to talk to her about my career with the company. I told her I was done with Burger Heaven and either she moved me up the food chain or I was quitting.”

Cal was getting a bad feeling in his gut. Nothing good could have come from the conversation.

“She’s a bitch, Dani,” Reid said. “Consider the source.”

His sister clutched her glass in both hands. She looked each of them in the face, then spoke. “She told me I would never move up in the company. When I pointed out that I had the most education in the business of any of her grandchildren and that I wanted it more, she explained why neither of those things was an issue. Can you guess why?”

Cal kept his gaze firmly locked on Dani. He watched pain fill her eyes and then he knew Gloria had finally made good on her threat to tell Dani about her father.

He stood. “Dani, it’s not—”

She turned on him. “Don’t you
dare
try to tell me this doesn’t matter. Of course it matters. It’s my life. It’s who I am.”

She glared at him as she spoke, then she set her glass down on the mantel and folded her arms over her chest.

“Oh, God. You know.”

He didn’t know what to say or do. Penny had warned him to come clean with Dani more than once. She’d said it would be a disaster if Dani found out on her own and she’d been right.

Walker and Reid stood. They looked at each other, then at Dani.

“Listen,” Reid began.

“No!” Dani took two steps back.

Cal moved toward her. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”

Tears filled her eyes. “I thought the worst of it was finding out I wasn’t who I thought I was. I thought the worst was knowing I wasn’t really one of you, but that’s not the worst, is it?”

“You’re one of us,” Cal told her. “You’re my baby sister. I love you, Dani.”

“How long?” she demanded. “How long have you known?”

Walker looked at him, then turned to Dani. “Since high school. That’s when Gloria told me. She said that she would tell you the truth if I went into the marines. I talked to Cal and Reid and found out she’d threatened them, as well. It was information she used to keep us in line. But I knew that if she hadn’t already told you the truth, for some reason she didn’t want to.”

Cal hadn’t thought of the situation that way, but Walker was right. Gloria had used whatever threat she thought would work best. He’d never considered that it was all just a game to her. He’d always been willing to do anything to protect Dani.

“I love you so much,” he told her. “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

She dismissed his statement with a frown. “Oh, please. You’ve been keeping secrets from me all my life.”

A single tear rolled down her cheek. She brushed it away impatiently. “What else did you know? What else did you keep from me? Hugh’s affair? Did he tell you all about it?”

Reid grabbed her by the upper arms, and stared into her face. “Dammit, Dani, stop it. I’m sorry. We’re all sorry. No, we didn’t know about your bastard husband. Yes, we’ve kept secrets, but only because we didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Don’t you think it hurts to never fit in? Don’t you think it hurts to not be one of the guys? To know you three have a bond I’ll never have?”

Cal reached for her. She jerked away from him, but he pulled her close and held her against him.

“You mean the world to us.”

“Bullshit. You treat me like a child. Do you know what it was like to keep trying and trying? Year after year I worked my butt off trying to please Gloria and no matter what I did it wasn’t enough. You all stood there, watching me fail and you never once thought to tell me why? To spare me that?”

She was right, he thought. This time when she tried to pull away, he let her.

She glared at them. “This was not your decision to make.”

Reid shook his head. “How do you say something like that to your only sister?”

“You find the words and if they don’t come easily, you keep looking for them. And I’m not your sister.”

Cal stared at her. “You will always be my sister. I don’t give a damn about who your father is. You’re my sister.”

“Half, technically,” she told him. “Get out.”

“What?”

She sucked in a breath. “Just go. I don’t want to talk to any of you. Go!”

The last word came out as a scream. Cal looked at his brothers, then back at her. Was it better to give her time, or should he try to get her to understand that he’d only been trying to protect her?

As soon as he thought the words, he realized that he’d screwed up trying to protect Penny all those years ago and he’d just made things even worse with Dani. It seemed as if he wasn’t very good at taking care of those he loved.

“Dani,” Reid began.

She took a step back. “Just get out of here. I don’t want to see you or talk to you.”

Walker nodded. “We’ll be in touch tomorrow.”

Instead of responding, she walked out of the living room. A few seconds later, a door slammed.

“Shit,” Cal said as he rubbed his jaw. “What the hell was Gloria thinking? I never thought she’d really tell Dani.”

“We should have been the ones,” Reid said.

“Ya think?”

Walker stepped between them. “We need to give her time. Some wounds need to bleed for a while.”

Cal knew Walker was right but he didn’t want to think of his sister bleeding. He didn’t want her hurt ever and he hated knowing he could have helped ease this one.

“I don’t think she should be alone,” Reid said.

“Penny will be home soon,” Cal told him.

Walker looked between them. “Should we give her a heads-up?”

Cal wasn’t sure how to answer. In truth, Penny already knew about Dani, so she wouldn’t be surprised.

“I’ll call her,” he said at last. “She’ll get here as soon as she can.”

 

P
ENNY HESITATED
a second before turning in to her driveway. She was still trying to figure out what she was going to say to Dani.

A fight with family was one thing. Finding out you weren’t family was something else.

Of all the siblings, Dani was the one most interested in being a Buchanan. She had always defined herself that way—by her name and her connection to the business. Even when she’d married Hugh, she’d refused to change her name.

Penny parked, then climbed out of her car. She cupped her belly, hoping her concerns weren’t upsetting the baby.

“There’s going to be a lot of emotion, little one. Some crying and maybe even some bad language. None of this is about you. I love you very much and we’re going to be fine.”

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