Thinking back, she couldn’t remember a family get-together when she’d stuck by his side for more than a few moments. She was always helping out, leaving Gabe to fend for himself. Knowing how uncomfortable and unwelcome he felt, whether justified or not, she should have made more of an effort to be with him. He would have done the same for her. She’d been pretty selfish.
Blinking back tears, she noticed the shrimp platter on the serving table was running low on cocktail sauce. Even though the party was sure to wrap up soon, she needed something to do. She wasn’t in the mood to be sociable right now. Scooping up the silver tray, she headed for the kitchen.
Gram leaned over the counter, peeling and eating the chocolate off the dipped strawberries. She appeared only mildly embarrassed over getting caught.
“You look sick,” Gram said as Louisa ladled cocktail sauce into the silver urn.
“Gee thanks, Gram.” She wiped up some sauce that had dripped onto the granite counter.
“Wanna play hooky and go outside with me for some fresh air? Don’t say no. I’ve been hiding out in here for about ten minutes now. It’s only a matter of time before your mom finds me.”
Louisa took her arm and helped her onto the patio, glad to get away. It was a beautiful afternoon, yet most of the guests remained indoors.
They made their way slowly into the yard to the picture-perfect garden bench situated among impatiens and ferns beneath the old maple. Gram’s joints creaked as she sat down. She patted the space beside her. When Louisa sat, Gram swung out and slapped her hard in the arm.
“Gram!”
“You’re a dummy. I should hit you again.”
Louisa rubbed the sore spot. For an old lady, she had quite the right hook. “What was that for?”
“I told you. You’re a dummy. I saw the way you kissed Gabe this afternoon.”
Louisa sat upright. “What?”
“The deaf thing doesn’t work until you get to be my age, missie. The kiss. When he dropped you off this afternoon. I saw it from my window. Looked like a doozie.”
Louisa realized her mouth hung open, so she shut it. “You see a lot, Gram,” she said weakly.
“More than you realize, missie.”
“But why’d you hit me?”
Gram looked ready to slap her again, so Louisa scooted to the far side of the bench.
“Evan’s big speech back there,” Gram said. “What’s with letting him go on record like that?”
This topic of conversation was getting old. Louisa sighed and searched for an easy explanation. All she came up with was, “I don’t know, Gram.”
“Gabe’s a good man. He always treated me like a friend.” She cleared her throat. It took a while. “I was sad to see your marriage end. I thought inviting him to the wedding would be the perfect way to shake up your relationship with Evan. I finagled the invitation to Gabe’s opening, too, you know.”
Louisa wasn’t surprised to hear that, wondering vaguely if Gabe knew. “Wait.” She blinked. “You staged that with Cedric, too, didn’t you? So Gabe and I would be forced to have dinner alone with each other.”
Gram smiled her answer.
“Why have you been working so hard at playing matchmaker, Gram? What makes you think Gabe and I would work out this time around?”
Gram was silent a while. She finally spoke. “Do you remember how opposed your folks were to Arty and Sarah’s relationship in the beginning?”
Louisa nodded. “That was before they got to know her.”
“But even then they thought he could do better than a small-town farm girl who wanted to be a PE teacher.”
“When they realized how much Arty loved her though, they gave them their blessing.”
Gram sat up a bit straighter. “Yes, they did.”
Louisa turned and gave her grandmother a long look. “Are you implying—?” She blinked fast several times. “Mother and Dad knew I loved Gabe. I must have told them a thousand times.”
Gram shrugged. “Maybe you did, maybe you didn’t. But actions speak louder than words ever will, missie.”
Louisa had to laugh at that, since she’d so recently heard the same line from Gabe. “What is this, Pick-on-Louisa Day?” She rubbed her sore arm again. “I can’t just turn my back on my family, Gram. That’s what I’d have to do if I went back to Gabe.”
“Says who?”
“He wants me to move to Chicago with him. If it were up to him, we’d never see you guys again. I can’t do that. It’s not fair.”
“You’re telling me he asked you to choose between him and your family?” Gram sounded disbelieving.
“Well, he didn’t say that in so many words, but…”
Gram massaged the back of her left hand. Her arthritis was obviously acting up again. “Here’s a hypothetical for you, missie. Say you
did
have to choose. Who would it be?”
“Gra-am,” Louisa protested. “That’s silly. I can’t choose—”
Gram waved her quiet. “Indulge an old lady. I could keel over any minute, and you’d spend the rest of your life feeling guilty for not answering my last question on God’s green earth.” She fixed an eagle stare upon her grand-daughter. “Now. When you think of spending the rest of your life with someone, who immediately comes to mind?”
“Gabriel,” Louisa said softly.
“So, you’d choose Gabe.”
Louisa hung her head slightly and nodded. “I’d choose Gabe.”
“Have you ever told him that?”
“No, but—” The proverbial light bulb flashed in her head. “Oh, God.” She pressed the sides of her face, as if she could squeeze the sense into her brain. “That’s all he wanted, isn’t it? To know I would choose him over anybody or anything else if I had to.” After a few shaky breaths, she said, “Now it’s too late. He’ll never forgive me. I’ve been such an idiot.”
Gram patted her leg. “It’s never too late.”
“Louisa!” Evan bore down on them across the green carpet of freshly trimmed lawn. “Everyone’s wondering where you two disappeared to. Gram’s the guest of honor. She should be inside.”
Gram leaned closer and murmured, “Funny how Evan’s name didn’t even come to mind in our little hypothetical a moment ago.” She squeezed Louisa’s knee. “No time like the present, missie.”
Louisa stood as Evan approached the bench. She touched his sleeve. “Evan, would you help Gram inside for me, please? Then could you come back out here?” She took a deep breath. “We need to talk.”
****
Evan’s large-knuckled hand closed around the ring she’d just given him. He looked at his fist a moment, not saying anything. As Louisa stared at the top of his down-turned head, she noticed his hair was beginning to thin in some areas. He obviously was unaware of it or he’d have made an appointment with Hair Club for Men by now. She immediately felt bad for thinking such thoughts at such a serious moment.
His cheeks were ruddy with anger. “You can’t do this to me, Louisa.”
“Evan, I’m sorry but—”
“No. Do you realize how hard I’ve worked these past few years? I’m not going to let your over-glorified expectations of romance ruin everything for me.”
“What are you talking about? And what do you mean, how hard you’ve worked?”
“We make a great team, Louisa. You, me, your dad—”
She held up a hand. “My dad? What does my dad have to do with us? Wait. This is all about politics, isn’t it?”
“Everything’s about politics. You should know that from growing up in your family.”
She blinked hard several times. “You don’t love me, do you?”
He rolled his eyes. “Of course I love you, Louisa. But love isn’t the issue here.”
“What is the issue then? That with my political connections I’d be the perfect trophy wife? Is that it? You’ve been using me, haven’t you? Our relationship was never based on anything besides what I could do for you, was it?”
“Nobody does anything without expecting something in return.”
Louisa shook her head, stunned she hadn’t seen this before. “Does my dad know about this?”
He stared at her as if she were stupid. “He’s a United States Senator, Louisa. The best political marriages are built on what you and I can offer each other. Look at any powerful couple. Each person wants what the other can offer: power, prestige, and status. Look at your parents. Now, it’s obvious that’s the reason they’re together, too—”
Louisa slapped him across the face, the sound echoing through the back yard.
“You know
nothing
about my parents,” she snapped. “Don’t you dare presume that you do. Now get out before I march inside the house and tell my father what a snake you are.”
He rubbed his cheek where she hit him. “You’re being a little melodramatic about this.”
“You want to see melodramatic? I’ll
show
you melodramatic unless you leave. Now.”
He lifted his hands in a defensive posture and backed up a step. “Okay, okay,” he said, his voice softening. “I’m sorry, Louisa. Really. I thought we understood each other. You’d been hurt so badly in your last relationship and were quick to tell me at the beginning of ours that you wouldn’t let yourself be hurt again. That you wanted something safe and stable.” He shrugged. “That’s what I was offering you. I guess you want more, eh?”
Louisa closed her eyes and took a deep breath, hurt washing over her. “Yes, Evan. I want more. I
need
more than that. Now, please.” She met his eyes. “Go.”
He nodded once and spun on his heel, disappearing into the lengthening shadows of the yard and garden. When the gate latch clicked, Louisa dropped onto the bench and buried her face in her hands.
“I would take great pleasure in castrating that boy with a dull blade.”
Louisa’s head popped up, and she saw Gram standing a few feet away. She laughed.
Gram grinned and came to sit beside her. “Ah, I knew that would make you smile.” She rested a hand on Louisa’s forearm. “Are you okay, Lou-lou?”
“Did you hear?”
“’Course I heard. I was eavesdropping.”
Louisa blew out a long string of air and watched a fuzzy caterpillar inch its way across a piece of bark near her right foot. “Throughout this whole thing with Gabe, I’ve been trying to be fair to Evan, not wanting to hurt him, but this whole time, he has never even loved me.”
“I think he loves you in his own way.”
Louisa shot Gram a dubious look. “Mother and dad will flip out.”
“So?”
Louisa chuckled and wiped away another tear. “Yeah. So what?” She stood.
“Where are you going?” Gram asked.
“I’m going to call Gabe.”
“Missie. Sit down.” She patted the wooden sit beside her.
Louisa sat.
“Let Gabe cool off a bit. He seemed pretty riled up when he left. And let yourself calm down, too. Go have a good cry, and see if that doesn’t make you feel better. Gabe’s not going anywhere.”
****
Gabe yanked the clothes from his closet and hurled them into the suitcases on his bed. He didn’t bother folding or arranging tem in a certain order, just shoved them in where they landed.
He eyed the honor bar, thinking how nice it would be to drink himself into a blissful oblivion. But he would still wake up without Louisa tomorrow, with one heck of a hangover to boot, so what would be the point?
When he’d finished his haphazard packing, he checked the room for anything he might have forgotten.
It was going to be a long flight back to Chicago tonight.
Chapter Nineteen
Louisa lolled against the back of the tub, up to her chin in frothy bubbles. Raindrops pitter-pattered on the roof, the sunny day having reverted to a light evening storm. The sound caressed her soul like gentle fingers through her hair. Her heart finally felt free.
Her eyes were open—really open—for the first time in her life. The reason a relationship with Evan had felt so safe was because there was no risk. She’d never truly given him her heart, and she knew now he’d never given her his.
Despite Gram’s suggestion, she’d tried calling Gabe, but it went right to voicemail as if he’d turned the phone off, which he probably had. Gram was right. She’d give him time to cool off, then she’d try again. Then if she still couldn’t reach him, she’d march straight over to his hotel and pound on his door until he let her in.
Swiping the damp hair from her forehead and getting bubbles on her eyelashes in the process, she glanced at the clock on the wall beside the bathroom mirror. Okay, that was long enough.
Climbing out of the tub, she wrapped herself in a thick, terry towel and reached for the phone. She released the clip that held up her hair as she dialed his number. An excited rumble stirred within her as she waited for him to answer, anxious to hear his voice, anxious to tell him everything. A furrow knitted her brow as she remembered their last conversation. He’d understand. He had to.
Straight to voicemail again. This time she didn’t bother leaving a message. She blew out a frustrated breath. She glanced at the clock again and calculated how long it would take to dress and get to his hotel. Hmm. Way too long.
She looked up the number to his hotel on her phone. “Gabe D’Angelo’s room, please,” she said, when someone answered
After a slight pause, the man said, “I’m sorry. He’s checked out.”
A wave of nausea swept through her stomach. “No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “He checked out tonight?” Her voice was more of a squeak.
“Yes, ma’am.”
“What time?”
“I’m sorry, ma’am. We’re not allowed to indulge—”
“Please.”
It was just one word, but the operator must have heard her desperation. After another pause, he said, “Seven-thirty.”
Louisa slowly replaced the receiver in its cradle. Gabe was on his way back to Chicago. He’d given up. After a few moments of feeling sorry for herself, she scrolled through the address book on her phone and found the number for a travel agency she and Evan had used in the past.
“Are there any flights leaving SeaTac for Chicago this evening?” she asked the agent.