Diary of a Teenage Taxidermist (15 page)

Chapter 11

Ethan’s personal life was shit. Dead squirrels were much better friends than people so he was happy to spend time with them instead of dwelling on his relationship status. Fortunately, Herbert didn’t charge him an arm and a leg for those, so Ethan still had some money left to spend on the supplies he needed to actually finish his pieces, but it was running out all too quickly in comparison to what he was earning. He was damn sure his parents wouldn’t subsidize this order, and since he didn’t get a down payment yet, all he had left was to make do day by day. Good that they didn’t know how much his grades fell, or they would make an even bigger fuss about his project than they already did.

Time was running out all too quickly, so even now, on the day of the prom, already dressed to the nines in his sleek black suit with lapels covered with mole leather to match his tie, and a pair of vintage crocodile skin shoes, he was down in his workspace, finishing the engravings on a squirrel skull necklace. He needed to wait for Derek to pick him up so he figured he wouldn’t waste time.

Sitting around wasn’t something he enjoyed lately anyway. It made him think of the messed up thing he’d had with Rob. It made him feel like the villain of the story, and he didn’t like it all that much. In fact, he didn’t like it at all. Not to mention how upset he got even thinking about that first time they had. He remembered how disgusted Rob seemed with him, and the way he rushed outside, as if he needed air not to puke all over Ethan. It had been a crappy experience, even if Ethan had come in a matter of seconds.

Robert must have remembered just how repulsive it was because they’d stopped speaking to each other. Without his company, school was once again a pain in the ass, even though Derek did chat to him in the hallway every now and then. They flirted a bit, but it was nothing like the pull Ethan felt for Robert. Maybe Ethan was just a ‘bad person at the core of his humanity’, like all those vegan girls at school had said. So he figured he wouldn’t bother Robert anymore. Rob clearly didn’t like being pushed.

He flinched when the door at the top of the stairs opened.

“Honey, what are you still doing here?” asked his mom, her feet already resounding along the concrete stairs. She wouldn’t enter the room, but had no problem pestering him from the entrance.

“I’m just finishing a project,” he mumbled, gently carving the patterns into the skull with a chisel.

“Really, Ethan, this madness has to end. You should dedicate all your time to school to make up for the missed month, and instead, I keep finding you here.”

He groaned in annoyance. Would this topic keep coming back to hit him in the head like a crooked boomerang? He hadn’t even told his parents about the order he got, afraid they would freak out that he won’t manage or that he shouldn’t take it on now, before going to college.

“Mom, I’m doing great at school. And it’s not like I’m gonna learn anything in the ten minutes before Derek comes to pick me up.”

Mother sighed, rested her slim hands on her hips, and shook her head. “You are obsessed with it. Really, once you’re out of home and living on your own, you will realize that you can’t let a hobby absorb you like that.”

“Oh, God, Mom! Just let me do this now then.” He didn’t even look up from the skull. He didn’t have time for this.

“Is this really where you’re going to show yourself to your date? A garage?” grunted Mother.

“No, I’ll obviously come up when he comes over. I just need to finish this first.”

There was a low sigh, but eventually, her footsteps moved away. “All right but this is the last time. You’ll be focusing on your studies starting tomorrow.”

Ethan just rolled his eye. He was sick of all this bullshit. And if that wasn’t bad enough, Ethan’s cell phone buzzed. He had to put away the work and look at the text message. Derek was almost there, so it only made sense for Ethan to put the skull away for now. He could finish it tomorrow. Or when he came from the prom at night.

He turned off the lights, the heating, and made his way upstairs. He didn’t really feel all that excited about the party anymore, but at least he would get to wear his new outfit, even if not to impress his estranged crush. The last thing he wanted was for Rob to think he decided not to go because of him. Ethan would go and have fun. Or at least stick around for a few hours, watch the band.

He almost bumped into his mother in the dark garage. “Goodness, what happened?” she asked.

“Nothing… Derek’s gonna be here in a few minutes. I don’t really know when I’ll be back.”

“Just don’t do anything stupid. You’re going to college soon anyway,” uttered Mother and hurried outside.

“It’s not like I’m gonna get pregnant, you know.” Ethan got out into the chilly air outside and straightened up the creases on his suit.

Mother frowned at him and wrapped her arms across her chest. “I don’t like your attitude. You should be ashamed to even joke like that.”

Ethan sighed and decided to keep his mouth shut. He could already see Derek’s car in the far end of the street. Getting drunk tonight didn’t seem like such a bad idea.

*

Derek was very chatty on the way to school. In fact, his mouth never closed, even as they left the car and headed for the door with a never ending stream of students in all their tacky finery.

“I like your shoes,” Ethan managed to squeeze in when they got into the building.

“Thanks, they’re vintage. I found them in this boutique in Manhattan, and for a moment, I was certain I couldn’t afford them, but then...” Derek’s babble melted into a buzz when Ethan spotted the familiar tall figure in the corridor. Standing next to Kelly, Rob looked like a giant.

She was too close, Rob was too handsome, so at that very moment, Ethan made the petty decision of grabbing Derek’s hand. “They’re really cool,” he said and kissed Derek on the cheek.

Derek blinked. “What? Her hideous tights?” he whispered, nodding toward a girl with rainbow-striped legs.

“No, your shoes.” Ethan refused to look at Rob. If he did, he was worried his throat would constrict too much.

“Ah, yeah.” Derek flashed him that blinding grin. It was weird that the guy didn’t appeal to Ethan much, even though there was absolutely nothing wrong with his looks, and most people would describe him as very handsome. “They remind me of a pair my late grandfather kept all his life. He had worn them on his wedding day and never even thought of getting rid of them. Such a romantic...”

Ethan wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he followed Derek’s lead. They walked along the tables full of treats and drinks. Ethan’s nape tingled with the powerful gaze he felt clinging to his back. The moment he wanted to say something, ending the flood of words from his date, a whole pack of Derek’s cheerleader friends swarmed them with all their taffeta.

“You guys look so sweet!” squealed Jessica, a bubbly blonde in a pink dress. Ethan could smell whiskey on her, which made him reimagine her as a tipsy rat, falling into the arms of some suave rodent.

“We need to post photos of you on Facebook,” chirped another girl, overwhelming Ethan with her high voice.

“It’s so nice that our school is so inclusive, isn’t it?” asked Derek, patting Ethan’s arm.

“Yeah, sur—” Ethan didn’t get to finish that either.

Pat the Rat, with his swarm of minions, just walked past and threw an empty plastic cup at them. “Inclusive of vampires like our Edward. Too bad you don’t sparkle at night, Eddie. That’d be very gay.”

One of the cheerleaders muffled a laugh, but Derek... along with his own minions in pastels, just glared at the school gorillas.

“Horrible people,” he uttered, sliding his hand to the small of Ethan’s back. That actually felt kinda nice. Reminded Ethan of when Rob did it. Only Rob’s hand did so much more than just make Ethan feel safe.

“I’m not even goth,” Ethan felt the need to add.

All the girls, and Derek, stared at him as if he just confessed to being an alien.

“Of course you are. No need to be ashamed,” whispered Derek, pulling him in for a hug.

“Goth is the new gay,” confirmed one of the girls.

Ethan frowned but went for the hug anyway. When he had his chin on Derek’s shoulder though, his gaze locked with Robert’s. Standing over the punchbowl, Rob seemed to have frozen with the cup half-filled, and the ladle in hand. His chest was rapidly rising and falling as he looked into Ethan’s face, but soon the charm was gone, and Robert swiftly rushed toward Kelly and his other friends.

Ethan groaned to himself and pulled away from Derek. What was he even doing obsessing about a guy whom he’d only met up with for sex? Maybe it was the guilt that Ethan was so relationship-challenged? Even since that argument they had with Robert in the car, Ethan felt like he’d killed a baby seal with a club or something. He couldn’t take back what had happened that first time, and now all he kept thinking of was that Robert was repulsed by him. No wonder he didn’t want to kiss.

A hand waving in front of Ethan’s face brought him back to reality. “You wanna dance? They’re already playing,” said Derek, moving his body to the distant rhythm.

“Sure, yeah.” Ethan let Derek grab his hand and guide him to the dance floor. At least the music wasn’t completely horrible, but Ethan wasn’t the best of dancers. Fortunately, one of the cheerleaders had a secret stash of vodka under her petticoat and wasn’t stingy about sharing. With his senses slightly clouded, it all became much more bearable, and he enjoyed himself, jumping around and making silly moves along with Derek and some of his friends, who kept reshuffling around them like a carousel of faces. He had no idea how much time has passed, but he was starting to feel sweat beading on his face, and an insatiable thirst.

“I’ll be back in a sec?” Ethan muttered and gave Derek another smooch before walking off. He needed a breather. Ethan loosened his tie and made his way down the empty corridors. With the entertainment fast approaching, people were reluctant to leave the temporary ballroom so he sneaked out to the bathroom without any trouble. His head was pulsing with heat and pleasantly light.

He took off his glasses to wash his face and neck. The cold tiles of the bathroom wall were all his forehead needed to relax so he rested it there with a small smile.

The dull sound of an opening door behind him sent a jolt of alarm all the way to his legs, but Derek’s smile was all he needed to calm down. So he wouldn’t be bullied tonight.

“You okay?” asked Derek, joining him by the wall.

“Oh yeah, I just needed to cool down after all the dancing.” Ethan smiled back at him.

Derek never looked away from Ethan, a small smile ghosting across his lips.

“You’re a good dancer. Not that I’m surprised with you being a cheerleader and all.” Ethan leaned against the wall. He couldn’t help but compare Derek’s body to Robert’s. Rob was so much taller, with wide shoulders, looking and acting older than his age, Derek on the other hand seemed so limber, with the athletic body of a runner.

“Thanks. Not too bad yourself,” whispered Derek, slowly turning toward Ethan. He was close enough for Ethan to feel the heat of his body without touching.

“I highly doubt that.” Ethan shook his head. “I’m having fun though.”

Derek stepped closer, his dark eyes smoldering Ethan’s skin. “It might sound strange, but I didn’t expect to have so much fun. You’re a cool guy.”

“Wow. Thanks. Was I a pity date?” Ethan pouted but couldn’t help his good mood, which was only fueled by alcohol.

Derek reached out, and moments later, warm hands brushed over the skin at the back of Ethan’s scalp. There was a slight pull, and he realized Derek was letting Ethan’s hair down.

“No, but I thought all you were was a pretty face.”

Ethan wasn’t sure where this was going, with Derek playing with his hair and the secluded atmosphere of being alone in the men’s toilet. “And I’m not?”

Derek shook his head, sliding his hand over Ethan’s nape. He moved until his back hit the wall and pulled Ethan with him. Caught completely off-guard, Ethan practically fell onto Derek’s lips. He blinked in shock.

“But I thought you weren’t… I mean…”

The soft, minty mouth moved over his in tune with Derek’s hands, which pulled Ethan closer. “Your hair is so long and soft. It makes me think of Jesus.”

What did one say to something like that? Ethan had no idea. “Is that a good thing in this context?”

Derek bit his lip and looked at the floor, his fingers brushing against Ethan’s sides. “I like you. Maybe we could ditch all that and go somewhere? What do you say?” he whispered. There was an odd contrast between the shyness on his face, and the familiar glimmer in his eyes. That look reminded Ethan of the way Robert had stared at him that last time in the changing room.

This wasn’t happening. Wasn’t it Derek who told Ethan he was saving himself for after college, or for Jesus, or some shit like that? “I’m… flattered, I mean, that technically sounds good. It’s just that… I’m after a bad breakup.” His voice went quieter. “I don’t think I’m ready to jump into anything again.”

Derek blinked and leaned forward, brushing his lips across Ethan’s cheek. His cologne smelled so tempting, so masculine. “I’m so sorry. But we could just talk, see how it goes?”