Did You Read That Review ? (16 page)

Authors: Amazon Reviewers

Tags: #Humor & Entertainment, #Humor, #Parodies, #Trivia & Fun Facts, #Reference, #Curiosities & Wonders

By
Derry
, December 15, 2012

I ordered this product last Tuesday, and after it was delivered to me by the usual delivery falcons, I immediately began applying it to my face and neck. However, something was wrong. No matter how much I applied, or no matter where I applied it, I just wasn’t as happy as the gentleman on the box. I bought several more packages of it, just in case I’d received a defective batch, but alas, I couldn’t recreate the male model’s sheer sense of happiness and general well-being. Then I began to think, “What if it’s not a problem with the product? What if it’s a problem with ME?!” I realized that it was indeed my own problems that prevented me from achieving inner peace and true joy, so I began selling all my possessions. In fact, the only thing I didn’t sell was the face paint, because I keep the packaging so I can look at that man’s face every day and swear that one day, I will be as content with life as he is. But I must cut this review short, as the manager of this Internet cafe doesn’t take kindly to people sitting naked in his seats and attempting to pay with positive thoughts. I’ll just wrap up with this: Thank you, AMSCAN. Thank you. When I bought your product, I didn’t just receive one ounce of white face paint. I received one ounce of truth.

488 of 496 people found the following review helpful

Perfection in a Tube

By
M. Taylor
, May 1, 2013

My mime class went ape-crazy over this stuff. Comments ranged from “_________!” to “__________!!!”. You’ve never seen people so excited.

50 of 60 people found the following review helpful

Pale-face to white face!

By
GregKickstartWebster
, January 22, 2014

As a Canadian of Scottish descent, I was doubtful I’d actually need this, but I have to say that I am whiter than I ever was before! The best part of that is that I am now able to blend into the snow like a pale, cold predator, ready to spring and scare passersby. If they notice me, anyhow. That’s not a guarantee because with AMSCAM Pace Paint, I am really, really white. Sorry if I scared you.

Inflatable Toast

Check out the real thing:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0016CSBS4

3.7 out of 5 stars

Name:

Inflatable Toast

ASIN:
B0016CSBS4

Price:

$7.10

Toast is great, but it’s hard to keep in your pocket. So what do you do when you crave the warm comfort of toast but don’t want to deal with the crumbs? You pull out your Inflatable Toast, blow it up, and admire its realistic toasty goodness! Each soft, vinyl slice of toast is 6 inches (15.2 cm) tall and has a standard inflation valve.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 14 people found the following review helpful

Saved my life

By
D. Finn
, December 7, 2010

I was recently shrunk to the size of a small field mouse whilst taking a bath by a strange gypsy whom I had inadvertently offended. Thank the maker for this inflatable slice of toasted joy. I managed to climb on top of the toast and paddle to the end of the bath, climbing up the plug chain to freedom. Only a fool would not always keep this item close to hand.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

Great, but limited usage

By
S. Barlow
, March 1, 2011

This is by far the most superior inflatable toast product on the market. HOWEVER, please note that this is NOT a life-saving,
personal flotation device. The owner’s manual does not make this distinction. RIP, Grandma.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

Perfect for the carb watcher

By
Candace
, January 5, 2011

This item is just perfect for the carbohydrate watcher. We all know how distressing those extra pounds can be on the scale. This product addresses all the dieter’s concerns. Just slather on the butter and lick away! No carbs to mess up that Atkins diet here, my friend. I am buying it for all my overweight friends.

15 of 16 people found the following review helpful

I only use POWDERED toast, thank you