Phan hugged him back, his head resting on Noah's shoulder for a moment. "I look like hell," he corrected. "But that's okay. Not a worry, anyway. Thanks for letting me come back."
"Well, okay," Noah conceded, "You do look better than I expected, though. And don't be stupid, you know I like these visits. Sit."
With a snort Phan said, "Yes, sir," and plopped himself into his chair. "Oh, yum. Masses of trans-fats.
Yay !"
"Just the thing to put a positive spin on the evening, don't you think?" Noah laughed, and served fries.
"So how is Master Bradford?"
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"Scary."
"Scary?" Noah raised an eyebrow and sat. "Scary how?"
"Scary the way only a man on a mission can be. He's really intense, Noah. Or maybe I'm just out of practice." Phan reached for a fry. "That's probably it. It's been a while since I had so many rules. He glares."
Noah laughed. "Yeah, he does. And he doesn't budge at all. If he wants you still and you twitch a finger, you're in the doghouse. I remember that about him."
"He sighs a lot, too." Phan grinned and grabbed another fry. "That's worse. That whole 'you aren't paying attention again, Phantom, and you know what that means...' thing. I think he actually has three sighs."
"Oh? What are they?" Noah was genuinely interested. He took a big bite of his sandwich and watched Phan.
Phan looked thoughtful as he chewed, and as soon as he'd swallowed he reached for the water bottle he'd brought. The label said it was raspberry, and it hissed when the top was loosened, the bubbles suddenly active. With a weary sigh, Phan poured a glass. "That's the 'I've told you three times' sigh. It gets followed by 'Phantom. Corner.'"
He winked and drank, then set the glass down carefully. He gave a barely audible sigh and shook his head. "That's the 'Okay, enough for now, you can expect two more strokes' sigh. The last one, though, I hear all the damn time. It's loud and obvious and so put on it makes me cringe."
Noah chuckled and leaned forward to pour himself some as well. "What? What is it?" He was grinning.
"Oh, roughly?" Phan grinned back and then put on a glower. "It means 'Phantom, you are a very naughty boy and I know you can learn, but God didn't have enough patience in his bag to make anyone deal with the kind of shit you give me, so I think I'll just stare at you until you figure out what you've done wrong, apologize, correct the error, and swear to never ever do it again. And then you may push your nose into the carpet 'cause I'm gonna spank your ass in a not fun way.' But just roughly."
Noah covered his mouth. Maybe he shouldn't laugh at that? Except it was hilarious, and he couldn't hold it back. He let himself laugh out loud, leaning back in his chair. "Oh... oh, my side hurts..." he said finally with a gasp. "Oh, Phan, you really are out of practice, aren't you?" His laughter didn't fade one bit.
"I'm almost hopeless," Phan said, giggling madly and reaching for his sandwich. "But I got three less spankings today than I did yesterday."
The fact that Phan was glad to receive fewer spankings wasn't at all lost on Noah. "Well, that's a start."
He was still giggling. "How many total did you get today?"
"Fifteen."
Noah winced. "Damn."
"Uh-huh. Told you he was scary."
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"I think the highest number of punishment strokes Sir has ever given me was six? Maybe seven." And Noah had found that to be quite enough, thankyou.
"Master Tobias and Master Bradford are... different," Phan said thoughtfully. "Not that one is necessarily a better Dom, but their methods and attitudes about things are their own. And I'm not used to having so many rules. It's been years since I've been under 24/7."
"Even I don't do that... " Noah acknowledged but quickly added, "Yet," with a grin.
Phan grinned back at him and lifted his glass. "Yet," he agreed with a nod. "How are things, anyway? I haven't talked to Sir at all. Has he calmed down any?"
Noah nodded sagely. "Oh, yes, we took care of his tension over the weekend. I suggested a rent boy that liked it rough and let him tie me up with a lamp cord and fuck me." He grinned. That had been so fucking hot. Tobias had been positively animalistic. Noah sighed wistfully. "It was great."
Phan winked. "He does like restraints."
"No restraints. He chased me around his office, called me raunchy names like 'whore' and 'come-hole,'
and then forced himself on me. In-scene of course. Tied me up with the cord on that blue porcelain lamp.
Jesus, I'm getting hard just thinking about it." That wasn't a lie.
Phan choked on his sandwich. "He what? Jesus Christ, Noah. Warn me before you say shit like that!"
He reached for the water, still coughing. "You're serious?"
Noah blinked at him. "Of course I'm serious. It was just a scene, Phan, he didn't actually hurt me. A couple of bruises, no big deal."
"But he doesn't do that! Well, not that I could ever get him to do, anyway. Not rough like that -- I mean a hard fuck, sure, but nothing like force." Phan looked at him with something like awe on his face.
"Damn, you lucky bastard. And thanks, now I've got wood. Prick."
Noah couldn't help the swell of smug pride he felt. Tobias hadn't done that with Phan, even though Phan had apparently asked for it. It probably shouldn't matter to him, but it did. "He loved it. Took him a minute to warm up, but once he was there he was so into it. I am a lucky bastard aren't I?" Noah snickered and munched on a fry.
"Uh-huh. And he really... did he...?" Phan swallowed, apparently forgetting his food. This was becoming a theme, although the flushed skin was new. "Did he really chase you and call you names? Did he... um.
Did he pin you down and threaten you?"
Noah nodded, giving up on fighting the rigid presence resting on his thigh. "Knocked over a chair and an end table, swept half the shit off his desk, knocked me to the floor with his weight and pinned me. It was so hot, Phan. He kissed me so hard my lip bled." He was a little breathless after that description, and he reached for his drink.
Phan moaned, his tongue darting out to lick his lower lip. "Oh, man. And you could fight back? You tried, right? I mean, it was a struggle?" He was shifting in his chair.
"I tried to fight back. I'm pretty strong, but he's heavy, you know? We definitely struggled. I got away from him a couple of times, but once he got me on the floor I knew I'd lost, he's just too big. He got the
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cord around my hands, lashed me to the leg of his desk, and shackled me with my jeans." Noah swallowed, remembering, the words pouring from him completely uncensored. "He fucking skewered me. Just drove in over and over... and then he did this thing, where he pulled all the way out you know?
And then slammed back in again? I came so hard I was dizzy."
"Excuse me." Phan carefully stood up, his erection obvious. "I'll be in the bathroom for a moment.
Bastard."
Noah blinked as Phan left the room, still half inside the memory himself. He was surprised, shocked actually, to find himself resisting a strong urge to call him back. To blow Phan right there in his kitchen. It took every ounce of his restraint not to chase after him. He thought about how he'd laughed off Dr.
Brewer's warning that awful night, about how Phan, unable or unwilling to speak for himself, had asked her to make sure Noah understood the extent of the attraction Phan had for him, and to tell him that he should, please, politely ignore it if Phan got hard while they were together.
He looked out the kitchen door again in the direction of the bathroom, confused by his still-present urge to follow Bradford's boy. Tobias hadn't given them any such permission, and the last thing he wanted to do was be a hypocrite. So he watched Phan go, and then went and stood, absurdly, in front of the open freezer. Jesus. He had to admit that the rough evening in Tobias' office sounded even hotter when he talked about it than it had actually been, if that was possible.
It really didn't seem that long before Phan came back; Noah was still standing, staring at ice cream and frozen ground beef, the freezer only just starting to work for him. Warm arms slid around his waist, and Phan held him from behind. "God," he said, his voice muffled in Noah's back. "That's the hottest thing I've heard in a long, long time, Noah. Almost shot in my jeans, and that just doesn't happen to me."
Noah bit his lip to keep from moaning. "First time for everything?" he offered, suddenlylightheaded . He put a hand on the freezer door to keep from leaning his weight into Phan. Phan smelled good, like sweat and a little musk. A healthy man-smell. "I, uh..." He cleared his throat and tried again. "Want a, uh, a milkshake or something?" he asked, still staring into the freezer.
"Sure."Phan's hand rubbed a circle on his belly. "What do you want?" There was definitely an offer in the tone, but a certain amount of wariness as well, like a tentative pass, if there was such a thing.
God, what didn't he want right then? Phan was warm and right there, and he was so hot when he was on his knees. Noah took a deep breath and exhaled heavily. Then he took Phan's hand in his and gently stepped out of his arms. "I can't, Phan," he said, with a soft smile, looking into Phan's eyes. "But, thank you."
He got a sad smile and a nod. "Yeah. Maybe some other time." Phan turned and went to the cupboards, opening doors until he found the tall glasses. "I'll make the milkshakes. You go ahead."
Noah didn't stick around long, grateful that they could be adult about this. He did give Phan a kiss on the cheek before disappearing into his tiny bathroom. He closed the door and leaned against it, knowing he'd made a good decision but feeling like an asshole for it all the same.
He unbuttoned his jeans, spread his feet wider, and wrapped his fingers around his cock. Phan's offer had seemed completely genuine. Not like a regression thing, or a bid for his attention. There hadn't been any kind of mischief in it or a desire to go behind anyone's back; he was making an affectionate gesture, and a sweet one at that. Noah imagined Phan's mouth, remembering it from New Year's Eve, and was moaning in mere moments. He wasn't sure if this might be a betrayal too, hiding in his bathroom
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fantasizing about something he shouldn't but could have had.
In his mind, Phan was on his knees, and he was grunting as Noah shoved his cock down his throat.
Phan's fingers dug into his ass. "Oh, yeah," he said out loud, though he hadn't meant to. "Fuck, yes." He was already on the edge, brought there by Phan's fingers on his belly. "Oh! Phan!" He grunted and shot, soaking his fingers and the edge of the sink.
He blinked his eyes open, panting, and a little panicked. Quickly, he cleaned himself up and then the bathroom, washed his hands, buttoned up his fly, and splashed his face with cold water. By the time he made it back to the kitchen, Phan had what looked like masterpieces on the table.
"Oh, my God."
"Rich and creamy, and you're now out of chocolate sauce," Phan said, beaming. "I'm gonna be bouncing all the way back to Master's with this much sweet stuff." He picked up one of the glasses and peered at Noah. "You okay?"
"Uh, yeah," Noah said, not actually sure if it was the truth. "A little embarrassed. This looks great." He took a seat and dug in, hoping to God that Phan changed the subject.
Phan winked and picked up a spoon. "Too thick for a straw. And don't be embarrassed -- it was damn hot. Hell, tell Tobias you got off on it again. He'd get a kick out of it, maybe." He winked again and started licking his milkshake off the spoon.
Noah had gotten hard off it, but he'd gotten off on Phan. He kept his eyes on his milkshake and sucked another bite off his spoon. "Maybe," he said. "So, uh, are you and Master Bradford... you know...?"
Why had he asked that? Sex was the last thing he wanted to be talking about right now. He worked on his milkshake and didn't meet Phan's eyes.
"God, no!" Phan laughed for a moment. "Not that I wouldn't, but we're not like that. He lets me get off sometimes, though, which is new. All of it's new, I guess. But at least I can react to the spanking now, and not fight on so many fronts at once."
"That's good, right? I mean you're a sub, you should be allowed to, you know, get off on what subs get off on." Noah grinned. "You think it's better for you now? I mean now that you have structure? Do you think it's helping, or is it too soon to know yet?" Noah stuck his straw in and sucked in until his cheeks were hollow, but the shake was still too thick. "Damn, this is a good milkshake."
"Ah, come on, you can suck that up," Phan teased. "I know you can." He laughed and spooned more of his own into his mouth. "I'm not sure if it's too soon or not. I mean, I'm getting a sore ass, so I'm not in the right headspace; things aren't clicking on that level yet. But it's good, you know? I'm getting a routine, and I get to serve. So that's helping, anyway." He paused and looked at Noah with a wince. "I was pretty messed up, huh?"
Noah looked up at Phan thoughtfully. "Yeah," he said gently. "But you'll get past it, Phan, I know you can. And it's going to be so much better when you do. Bradford -- Master Bradford... " Noah caught himself, remembering Bradford's request that he show a sub's respect, "is every bit as skilled as Sir is.
They have different styles, but they're both very experienced. I was pretty fucked up, too, when I first came to the club, after David and all, and Master Bradford was very helpful for me."
"Oh, Master is a help, that's for sure. And the fact that he's even taken me on after all I've put him
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through means I'll be grateful forever. I hope that someday I'll be able to show both of them how much I value what they've done. Sir especially." Phan looked down quickly and grabbed his straw. "Time to suck."