Read Discovering Sophie Online
Authors: Cindy Roland Anderson
Chuckling, Jack took the donkey’s reins. “I know when I’m not wanted.”
Not wanted?
That was the whole problem. Sophie wanted him so much it hurt. She touched Jack’s arm, meeting his pale blue eyes. “I’m sorry for snapping at you.”
His eyes crinkled. “I know.”
A smile crept across her face. “Go take care of Fred.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Watching him walk away, Sophie wondered if Jack had even considered seeing her after she returned home. Sure, he’d said he loved her, and he certainly enjoyed kissing her, but she shouldn’t have assumed that meant he was looking for a serious relationship.
What if Jack just wanted to date for an indefinite amount of time, like as in a long-distance relationship? What if he never wanted to commit to marriage? For heaven sakes, Sophie didn’t even know if Jack wanted to have children. He knew she wanted a large family, but he’d never voiced his opinion one way or the other. Although, now that she thought of it, he had asked her what she would do if her husband only wanted a couple of kids. Did that mean he only wanted two kids?
To be fair, she hadn’t come right out and asked him any of this. She’d simply hinted at different things, hoping he’d take the ball and run with it, which he hadn’t.
She watched Jack disappear with Fred and knew she had to be honest with him. Turning away, she followed Hector to the clearing where they’d make camp. Somehow, she and Jack needed to have a talk.
After changing into clean clothing, Sophie sliced a couple of mangos while Hector fixed beef stew from their dwindling selection of MRE’s and dehydrated food pouches. After finishing the task, she washed her hands, then took a seat on a log.
“The stew smells good,” Sophie said, pulling her journal out from her backpack. “I’m starving.”
“Me too.” Hector lowered the flame on the butane burner and stirred the stew with a spoon a couple of times. “I’ll go down to the river to wash up and send Jack back to camp.”
“Good. I’m beginning to think he fell in or something.” Jack had been gone for a while now. Sophie wondered if she’d been so grumpy that he was now avoiding her.
Laughing, Hector took off for the riverbank. “I’ll call if I need a doctor.”
Sophie hoped Jack would come back quickly. She didn’t like being alone, especially with all the sounds of the jungle. As the sky darkened, the sounds of the animals and insects seemed creepy. Trying to keep her mind occupied, she opened her journal and found the page she was looking for.
Her eyes quickly scanned the paper, and she was unable to suppress a smile. She’d decided to create a what-she-liked-about Jack list. If the man ever got a chance to read it, his head would swell bigger than his bulging muscles.
Reading over the glowing attributes she’d listed, Sophie knew she was hopelessly, head-over-heels in love with Jack. She’d even written her name coupled with his last name.
Sophie Mathison
.
She hadn’t tested her name with the last name of a boy she liked since high school, and if Jack was ever to see this she, would be mortified. Even though she had been tempted, at least she hadn’t written down the names of her children—their children—with his last name. That really would be embarrassing, especially if Jack didn’t want her or a family.
An almost desperate, panicky feeling enveloped her when she considered the possibility of things ending with Jack. She wanted to get married, and she wanted babies. Sophie was still young, but in three years, she would be thirty-five—the age which the medical professionals considered to be advanced maternal age. She knew Peter was eager to start a family right away, although he only wanted three or four children since both of them had their careers to think about.
However, Sophie had always wanted to be a stay-at-home mother and maybe work one or two days a week as a pediatrician without doing any surgeries. If she got in with a big enough group, she would only have to take weekend call every six weeks or so.
Again, she wished she could talk openly with Jack. She sighed, turned the page, and read last night’s entry that clearly reflected her frustrations with Jack and his lack of communication.
A twig snapped, and she gasped, jerking her head up. “Oh, I’m glad it’s you.”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” Jack said. He had an impish glint in his eyes which meant he’d had every intention of sneaking up on her.
“Somehow I don’t believe you.” His hair looked damp, and he had on a clean shirt. “Did you take a bath?”
“Not intentionally. Let’s just say Fred doesn’t like me as well as Hector.” He sat down beside her and leaned over, making an obvious attempt to sneak a peek at her journal. “What’re you writing about?”
She closed the journal and placed her hands on top of it. “I wasn’t writing. I was reading.”
The corner of his mouth lifted. “Okay. What’re you reading about?”
“Stuff.”
He narrowed his eyes. “What kind of stuff?”
This was the perfect opening to talk to him about her concerns, but it wasn’t really the best time. Hector could come back at any moment.
When she didn’t answer right away, he tapped his finger on her journal. “Maybe you should just let me read it myself.”
“No way.” She pulled the book close to her chest and glanced toward the river. “Hector’s coming back any minute now, so it can wait until we’re alone.”
“Before I was curious, but now you’ve got me worried.”
This was not going how she had wanted it to, and now Jack did look concerned. She was being ridiculous and making it much worse. “Okay.” She moistened her lips. “What’s going to happen to us when I go home, Jack?”
His eyes appeared even more troubled than before as he sucked in a breath and exhaled slowly. “I don’t know.”
“What do you want to happen to us, then?” she questioned softly.
After a few seconds of contemplative silence, he shifted on his seat. “I know I want to see you again, Sophie. I just don’t know all the logistics.”
Meaning, he wasn’t planning on moving back to Colorado anytime soon. Honestly, It wasn’t fair for him to have to be the one to move, but unless she got a good attorney and paid a steep fine, she wouldn’t be able to get out of the four year contract she’d signed with the hospital two years earlier.
“Me either, but I’m glad you want to see me again.” She looked up at him through her lashes and gave him a tentative smile. “I should’ve talked to you sooner. Maybe then I wouldn’t have been such a witch today.”
“A witch?” Jack laughed and winked at her. “You’ve been slightly crabby today, but I figured that had more to do with the rain and the bugs.”
“That probably added to my misery, but, to be honest, I thought you were avoiding talking about the future because you weren’t interested in seeing me again.” She shrugged. “It made me cranky.”
He reached over and took her hand. “Actually, I
was
avoiding the subject, but not because of what you thought.” He held her gaze as he slowly circled his thumb in the center of her palm. “The thing is, Sophie…I’m scared, and don’t feel worthy to date you, let alone marry you.”
Jack wanted to marry her! Sophie’s heart soared with his words, but she forced herself to sit still and let him finish.
“I’m trying to make things right with God, and I’m working on figuring out a way to contact my family, but I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to reconcile with them.” His eyebrows bunched together, and he dropped his head to focus on their hands. “I only have one brother. I don’t know if he’s still married to Heather, or how many kids they have. I can’t promise you big family get-togethers for holidays and special occasions, or that those get-togethers will be pleasant. I’m willing to share my parents, but I don’t know if they’re interested in sharing my life.”
Sophie felt her bottom lip quiver with pent up emotion. Jack remembered everything about their conversation. Well, almost everything. They still hadn’t discussed children.
He lifted his face and pierced her with his eyes. “I want kids, too. I don’t know how many, but I’m willing to negotiate.”
The obvious love in his eyes nearly took Sophie’s breath away. All her life she’d dreamed about this moment—discussing her future with the man she’d fallen in love with—talking about the possibility of starting a family and what they wanted out of life. No wonder she could never return Peter’s affection. Everything she felt at this moment went beyond what she had ever thought possible.
She could feel her heart and respiratory rate increase. There was a warm current flowing from Jack’s hand throughout Sophie’s entire body, settling in her stomach. When she got back to Colorado, she planned on studying the autonomic and sympathetic nervous system in depth as well as the physiology of a person experiencing love. The medical doctor in her was fascinated by the way her body reacted to this one man.
“While having a large extended family would be great,” Sophie said, clutching his hand tighter. “It’s you I want, Jack. You, and eventually our children, will be enough.”
Sophie leaned over and kissed him. The moment their mouths touched, the soft kiss she’d intended exploded into something much more passionate. That certainly hadn’t been her intention, since Hector could walk in on them at any moment.
Jack returned the kiss with equal vigor and circled his arms around her, pulling her close. Sophie gave herself over to the kiss with abandon and was vaguely aware of her journal falling to the ground. The warmth of Jack’s palms against her back heightened her awareness. As he deepened the kiss, Sophie became lost to everything around her.
The incredible love she felt proved beyond any doubt that God
had
created a man and a woman to be together. Never before had she felt this way about anyone. Not even David.
Needing to take a breath, Sophie pulled away. “Well,” she said, her voice trembling, “that was very enlightening.”
Jack’s blue eyes blazed with passion. “Are you going to share your enlightenment?” His voice was low and intimate.
“I think I need more research before I share my findings.”
“More research?” Jack asked, his eyes dipping down to her mouth.
He leaned forward to kiss her again, but Sophie pressed her hand against his chest to stop him. “Not now. Hector will be back any second.”
“He’s actually here now,” Hector said coming back into camp.
“Ah, Hector,” Jack teased. “Your timing is terrible. A few more minutes alone with Dr. Kendrick and I could have persuaded her to talk.”
“
Amigo
, it looks like you were doing more than just talking.”
Sophie’s face flooded with heat as Jack said, “That, my friend, would’ve been part of the persuasion.”
* * *
Sophie awakened sometime during the night and immediately sensed someone was watching her. As her eyes adjusted to the dark, she saw a man crouched down by her sleeping bag. Thinking she was hallucinating, she blinked several times, but he was still there. Terror filled every part of her when he pulled out a knife and flashed it before her eyes.
Is this just another nightmare?
The apparition violently grabbed her wrist, making her cognizant of how real he was.
God, please help me!
She scrambled for the door and started to scream. A dirty hand covered her mouth, muffling her cry for help. She struggled to free herself and felt bile rising in her throat, making her nauseous. The man moved his hand away and jumped back as Sophie emptied her stomach onto the sleeping bag. The evil man spoke angrily in Spanish.
She had a split second before he would cover her mouth again. She screamed Jack’s name and barely got out, “Help me!” When a fist slammed in the side of her face. The impact snapped her head back, and she fought to stay conscious.
Fear clawed at her throat as the man grabbed her by the hair. He flung the soiled bag out of the way and pulled her to his body. His hand cupped her mouth again, and he spoke in a low, angry voice. She couldn’t understand anything he said, but instinct told her he’d kill her if she screamed again.
Had Jack heard her? She prayed that he had.
In an instant, her life seemed to flash in front of her. Sophie knew if this man took her away, she would never see Jack again. Just like in Jack’s dream.
Her muscles tensed again as she fought to free herself. Over the pounding of her heart, she heard a quiet voice—as if God was speaking to her—tell her to stop struggling. She relaxed her body, and the man loosened his grip.
“Doctor. Come,” he said in broken English, his breath hot and smelling like stale cigarettes.
How did they know she was a doctor? Afraid to speak, she mutely nodded her head.
The man held up her shoes, motioning for her to put them on. When she finished tying them, he jerked her arm and roughly pulled her out of the tent. Sophie’s body shook intensely, making her legs feel unsteady. The side of her face throbbed where the man had hit her.
Frantically, she shifted her eyes to Jack and Hector’s tents. They were silent. How could they sleep through this? Then she had a horrible thought: What if they’d already been killed?
Thick fingers gripped her arm. “Stay,” the man said as he released his hold.
Her abductor put a dirty cloth in her mouth to gag her. The problem was it literally gagged her. The full moon provided enough light for Sophie to see his dark eyes narrow with anger when she started to retch. Using the back of his hand, the man slapped her face again, and Sophie swallowed down the acid from her stomach as he finished securing the rag over her mouth to silence her.
Forcefully, he jerked her arms in front of her, binding her hands together with thick twine. Every defense course she’d ever taken, stressed the importance of never allowing the abductor to take you to another location. The man came around behind her, and Sophie desperately tried to come up with a plan.
“Go,” the man whispered harshly. He shoved her in the back, and Sophie stumbled, falling to her knees.
God, I don’t know what to do. Please help me
, she silently pleaded as she struggled to stand back up.
Her prayer was immediately answered when Jack suddenly appeared out of his tent. “Please,” he begged softly. “Don’t hurt her.” Then he shook his head slightly and spoke in Spanish, “
Por favor, no le hága daño a ella
.”