Echoes of the Heart (8 page)

‘I know you’re busy. I’m sorry to arrive unannounced, and I won’t take up a lot of your time.’

The strain and exhaustion of her voice wrenched at his heart and made him want to pull her into his arms and hold her safe against the world. Fool, he berated himself. This is Bennett’s widow.

‘I need a job.’

What?

Caught completely off guard by Amanda’s statement, Jake leant back against his desk, crossed his arms over his chest, and gave her his most penetrating look. She shouldn’t need to work. Bennett would have left her a small fortune.

‘Something secretarial,’ she rushed on. ‘I’m a bit out of practice, but…’

‘You expect me to believe you need a job?’

‘I do need a job.’

‘Why?’

She broke eye contact with him and started wringing her hands in her lap. ‘The usual reason. I need money.’

Questions filled his brain as he absorbed that statement. ‘As Bennett’s widow, you must be very wealthy.’

‘Lloyd didn’t leave me anything.’

Shocked, he stared at her. Was she telling the truth? She needed money?

There was no resentment in her voice, just a simple statement of fact. That didn’t add up. She’d married Bennett for his money. Why wasn’t she outraged if she’d ended up with nothing?

Confused by her calm reaction, he considered it for a few moments before summing up, ‘You need money to contest the will.’

‘I’m not contesting the will.’

No way! She had to be after money. That was what her marriage had been all about.

‘Who did he leave the money to?’

‘His sister.’

‘You marry a man for his money, he leaves you nothing, and you’re not contesting the will?’

‘Jake —’

‘You’re content to let Fiona have Bennett’s fortune, even after the way she treated you at his funeral?’

Her sigh was impatient. ‘At the time of the funeral, the will hadn’t been read. Fiona didn’t know the money was hers. That’s why she was so angry with me.’

‘You think her anger was all about the money?’

‘Yes. Primarily.’ She wrung her hands. ‘She always resented me. Look —’

‘I find it hard to believe you’re prepared to give up on Bennett’s fortune without a fight.’

The smile she gave him was bitter. ‘Believe what you will, but that’s the truth.’

‘I guess this is Bennett’s way of punishing you for taking lovers during your marriage.’ He watched her grit her teeth, but she remained silent. ‘What about your home in Vaucluse?’

‘Lloyd’s cold mausoleum was never my home.’

‘You’ve moved out?’ he asked, astonished she should give up the luxury waterfront home.

‘Yes. It belongs to Fiona now.’

That explained the disconnection of the old phone number. ‘Where are you living?’

‘I’ve found a new place,’ she almost snapped at him. ‘Listen —’

‘Are you living with your lover?’ he demanded.

He watched colour creep from her chest to her neck and stain her face.

‘I don’t have a lover.’

His eyes narrowed. ‘Couldn’t Middleton stand the heat?’

‘I’ve already told you, Hugh was never my lover!’

There was such outraged indignation in every syllable he almost believed her. Middleton had made the same heated denial to him after Bennett’s funeral.

Fire sparked to life in her eyes as she leant forward in her chair. ‘Lloyd’s suicide note was a lie your newspapers delighted in printing.’

‘Is that why you’re here? Are you planning to sue the newspaper group or to demand some compensation out of court?’

‘No. I would never operate that way.’

An acid taste filled his mouth. ‘You’re not above marrying and sleeping with the devil for money, but you won’t lower yourself to file a lawsuit? How noble of you, Amanda.’ Fury burned through his veins. ‘You’d be wasting your time, anyway. Every newspaper in the state picked up the story of Bennett’s suicide, and most printed a copy of his suicide note.’

‘Your papers were the first.’

He regarded her with scorn. ‘Bennett sent his note to my papers.’

Her shoulders jerked in a gesture of frustration. ‘I was not having an affair,’ she repeated through gritted teeth.

Disbelief caused his eyebrows to rise. ‘Well, something sure drove your husband to suicide. I don’t understand why he would implicate you and Middleton if there wasn’t at least some truth to that rumour.’

‘Lloyd was jealous of Hugh’s success. Hugh won the majority of his cases and it came easily to him. Lloyd had to fight dirty and even then, he often failed. I’d say that’s why he tried to taint Hugh’s name. Your newspapers printed lies defaming the reputation of a man who happens to be a very ethical lawyer. The articles have also torn my reputation to pieces and made it impossible for me to get a job.’

The darkness of jealousy replaced disbelief. His blood thickened and red tinted the edge of his vision as he heard her defence of Middleton. ‘Why would Bennett lie? His note claimed he committed suicide because he was so depressed about your faithlessness.’ She hung her head but offered no response. ‘As for your reputation—I think that was in tatters long before your husband’s suicide. The marriage of an impoverished woman to a wealthy man, twenty years her senior, is bound to shed a bad light on the woman’s morals.’

Her chest rose as she took a breath and she raised earnest eyes to his. The anxiety in her expression caused his anger to abate.

‘I’m not here to discuss my marriage. I’m here because I’m desperate, Jake.’ She paused, seeming to steel herself for what she had to say. ‘I’ve been looking everywhere for an office job,’ she said at last. ‘People recognise me from all the publicity. They won’t hire me…’ she broke off as a sob caught in her throat but she squared her shoulders. ‘I’m waitressing every morning at a cafe. I’m washing cars in the afternoon and dishes at night, but the jobs aren’t permanent.’

He watched her nervous fingers fidget with the straps of her handbag and noticed her fingernails had been chewed mercilessly. The skin on her hands looked dry—as though they had soaked for too long in a bucket of bleach. The woman before him was vastly different from the beauty he remembered. It seemed she was telling the truth about her employment.

Why did the thought of her working so hard make his guts twist? When she was such a physical mess, he shouldn’t still feel this incredible, overwhelming pull of attraction to her. It was madness. He could have just about any beautiful woman he wanted. He shouldn’t want Amanda. He shouldn’t be concerning himself with easing her distress.

Clenching his jaw, he forced himself to remember that she didn’t deserve any consideration from him. He straightened from where he’d been leaning on his desk and turned away from her to gaze out at the ferry activity on Sydney Harbour. Normally, he loved the panoramic view and the white sails of the Opera House. Today, he was too wound up to absorb it.

The cool logic of his brain told him to think in business terms now. Renowned for finding ailing companies and turning them around, he was able to spot his opponent’s weaknesses and capitalise on them. Amanda was like a company he wanted to buy. She’d come to him with a weakness and he was prepared to exploit it ruthlessly to achieve his own goal.

He turned back to her. ‘Are you in debt?’

For a couple of moments she chewed on her lip as though she was wrestling with her words, struggling with how much she should tell him. When her voice finally emerged, it sounded hollow. ‘I need money.’

‘How much money do you need?’

After she took another long breath, she named a sum that made his eyebrows rise. ‘You’ve certainly indulged in some retail therapy since Bennett’s death, yet your appearance in no way reflects it.’

‘Well, you might look handsome, but your utter lack of manners proves that you’re no Prince Charming,’ she said caustically as her hands clenched into fists.

He smothered a smile. ‘You have to admit it’s quite a spending spree,’ he continued. ‘You’ll have to learn to live within your means now Bennett’s money’s dried up.’

Even though she flinched, she didn’t try to justify her spending.

‘Will you give me a job?’ she pressed.

‘No.’ Why give her a job and let himself be weak and vulnerable to her again? For his own self-preservation, his own sanity, he’d capitalise on her need. He’d manoeuvre her like a pawn on a chessboard because her past betrayal had sent his emotions into exile, and he didn’t want to visit that dark place again. He had to keep the control here.

Her knuckles turned white as she gripped her handbag strap. ‘Would you lend me the money? I promise I’d pay it back with interest, but it could take several years.’

He regarded her with profound scepticism. The desperation in her eyes, the plea in her voice made him suspect there was more going on than she was telling him. The stakes seemed higher than Amanda’s need to acquire finances to live the high life. But what else could she need so much money for if not to fund the upmarket lifestyle she was used to? His lips tightened.

‘Please, Jake —’

‘No,’ he said emphatically.

Her face crumpled as though she was about to dissolve in tears. Despite his resolve, his gut clenched as he saw the vulnerability etched into her features and noted the slight tremble of her lips.

‘I’m sorry I wasted your time,’ she said hopelessly. There was an emotional waver in her voice and her legs wobbled as she stood up to leave. ‘Goodbye, Jake.’

No!

‘Goodbye’ was way too final at this stage. He wouldn’t let her walk out of his life until he was ready to let her go. This situation wasn’t what he’d expected. It didn’t fit the game plan he’d mapped out, but he still had the upper hand. Now was the time to move in and close this deal on his terms.

‘Sit down,’ he commanded.

‘I…’ she hesitated.

‘I didn’t say I wouldn’t give you the money,’ he stated with a calmness he was far from feeling.

She sat, a tiny flicker of hope flaring in her eyes.

Anxious to put something solid between himself and Amanda before he gave in to his mad longing to pull her into his arms and kiss her senseless, he stepped behind his desk, using it as a physical barricade between their bodies. Damn it, he was nervous because he had to play this situation right. He couldn’t give in to this powerful pull on his emotions or let his heart become involved. This had to be about the physical desire he felt for her.

‘You’re my last option, Jake.’

Guilt speared through him as he regarded the desperation in her face, but he forced himself to remember his plan to get her back in his bed then excise her from his life. This had to be about his survival and his future. His future looked like a lonely one unless he could move on from Amanda.

‘What about Middleton?’

‘What about him?’ she shot back. ‘Do people usually go to their lawyer to ask for a loan?’

‘In this case —’

‘I’ve been to every bank in town and none of them are prepared to lend me a cent,’ she blurted.

‘I guess that gives me more bargaining power then, doesn’t it?’ he asked with ruthless satisfaction.

Her eyes narrowed into an expression of wary intensity.

‘I’m not a bank, and I’m not prepared to lend you the money—especially when I doubt I’d ever get it back.’

‘That’s not true, I’d —’

‘But I will give it to you,’ he cut across her protest.

Renewed hope widened her eyes. ‘You will?’

He saw some of her tension evaporate as she anticipated his help. Her reaction tied his gut into knots and shot through his conscience, but damn it all, this time he intended to have her on his terms. This was a business deal. He wanted something and he would pay to get it. There was no room in this negotiation to get sentimental or caught up in bitter regrets for what might have been. Sophie had warned him not to lose his heart again, and there was no chance of that. His heart would be completely guarded. Amanda wouldn’t make a fool of him again.

‘I’m prepared to compensate you very generously for your services in my bed,’ he offered without emotion.

Although he wouldn’t have thought it possible for her to look any worse, somehow she managed it. A violent shudder passed through her body, like she’d just left the shelter of a warm hut and stepped into the icy blast of a blizzard.

‘You can’t ask that of me.’ Her voice was a whispered plea.

‘Take it or leave it.’ He schooled his voice to impart detachment. ‘That’s the only offer I’m prepared to make.’

The offer was on the table and he wouldn’t negotiate. She’d played him years ago but this time everything would be on his terms. Now he knew her for what she really was and although it was wrong to capitalise on her desperation, it was time for retribution.

He’d suffered because of her. He’d fought with his father over her, endured sleepless nights as he’d tormented himself with images of her in Bennett’s bed and been unable to banish the knowledge she’d been expecting her husband’s child. Worse, he’d rushed into marriage with Sophie in an attempt to move forward with his life—a decision they’d both come to regret. No woman he’d met stirred the same degree of attraction in him as this one, and he wanted to be free to meet someone else, to create a future and a family with someone without the spectre of his failed romance with Amanda interfering.

This time Amanda wasn’t going to use him then discard him and run to another man. It would be over when he called an end to it. He would stamp out the burning attraction he had for her and banish her from his dreams. Then, he might finally be able to put the last couple of years behind him and move on with his life.

She owed him that.

‘No!’ she cried. ‘I can’t do it.’

‘In that case, I won’t pay you a cent.’ His tone was uncompromising as he sat down.

He heard the air rush out of Amanda’s lungs and regarded her as she stared at him with her lips parted in an expression of disbelief. ‘You were really serious about the proposal you made at the cemetery.’ Her voice was barely audible.

He nodded.

Shaking her head she said, ‘Jake Formosa—Managing Director and majority shareholder of the mighty Formosa Corporation. You might wield your power every day and win major corporate battles time and time again, but I’m not someone you can bend to your will. You can’t control me.’