Everything I want: Will Alfie and Lily's love survive?... (3 page)

We had been writing like mad and had some great songs now. Louie had introduced me to Barney Sherman, a producer, who was showing more and more interest in us as recording art
ists.

Barney had told me that when I finished college he’d set up a meeting to discuss our development as a band. I was on board and mentioned this to Louie. As far as Louie was concerned, we were bound to get signed, and he had no intentions of interfering with any chance we might have in the bigger scheme of th
ings.

I changed into my outfit for the gig in the bathroom and walked into the dressing room. I was wearing some leather hot pants and a baggy, green, silk top that hung off one of my shoul
ders.

I had a black lacy bra on underneath and my signature stilettos. “Fuck,” Lennon grunted. “You’re just determined to try my patience now. I don’t want guys leering at you, Lily. Put something els
e on.”

I shook my head. “Don’t sweat it, Lennon.” Digs and Shawn erupted in a bout of raucous laughter, instantly remembering something Cody had said at my audition for the
band.

Cody had commented on my appearance that day, saying something like, with the way I looked he would have to learn to bounce around on stage with a permanent hard on. I had flushed but stood my gr
ound.

“Fine! Wear it, don’t mind me,” he snick
ered.

“I think Lennon needs a girlfriend,” I quipped. Shawn spurted out his soda drink and nodded exaggerat
edly.

“Stop it, you’re killing me. What happened to the innocent little English girl we used to
know?”

I grinned cheekily. “Guess she grew up fast being around you guys. So watch out… all of
you.”

Digs high-fived me and smirked. “Yeah, baby, you’re one of the guys now, huh?” It was more of a statement than a question, so I just smiled back at him and winked. To think, I was scared of him in the beginning because of his tattoos and mohawk. But he was actually a really hot guy and one of my best al
lies.

Chapter 3
– Tough decisions

A
lthough I had been playing in Louie’s clubs for almost two years, it never got old. I still got nervous stepping out in front of everyone. That didn’t mean I wasn’t confident th
ough.

I was a far cry from the meek girl that first crept out on stage for my first gig with XrAid. I was pretty recognizable in stores too these
days.

The occasional club goer would approach me to tell me they loved the gig they had seen at one of the clubs. It was cute when that happ
ened.

It seemed strange to see my parents standing in front of me tonight. We were used to people in their teens, twenties, and sometimes their thirties as our audi
ence.

I played well, and as usual, Cody and I had a real rapport going with the crowd up there. The best part was seeing the look on my dad’s face when he saw me rock out with Lennon on our guitars. I almost burst out laughing as he began to get carried away by our m
usic.

We finished our set, and everyone got together again out at the front of the bar. Before I could speak, Jack pushed in front of everyone. “Mine! First dibs on the dancing,” he called
out.

My eyes flicked to Rosie, and I pulled on the hem of Jack’s t-shirt. He leaned into me, and I spoke into his ear. “You need to tone it down, Jack. You’re making your girl uncomfort
able.”

Jack turned his head in her direction and sure enough, Rosie’s face was like thunder. Her eyebrows were knitted tight, and if her mouth pursed any more it would have looked like a butt
hole.

Jack looked back and chuckled. “Damn, she does look pissed, huh?” I nodded and gave what I hoped was a sympathetic smile in Rosie’s direction. “Hmm, this is a difficult dilemma,” Jack said. “Do I wait until tomorrow and piss her off by telling her we’re not changing or do I do it now? The thing is if I make her deal with us now, I’ll need to accept that I won’t get laid tonight.” He looked confused by the choices he had given him
self.

Jack’s eyes flicked to Rosie then back to me. “I’ll be right back, bathroom break.” He walked off in the direction of the men’s restr
ooms.

Cody leaned in. “What was that about?” I told him, and Cody mumbled, “Poor Rosie, she’s going home alone tonight,
huh?”

I scowled at Cody. “What makes you say
that?”

Cody chuckled. “Seriously, Lily? He’s never going to put anyone before you, even if they have a vagina that does tricks.” I couldn’t help but giggle at Cody’s com
ment.

“Ask her to dance Cody, please… for me?” Cody’s eyes flicked across at her, and he smiled. Her face froze, and then she cracked him a forced s
mile.

He looked back at me and sighed. “Poor girl, next you’ll be asking me to fuck her so that Jack can go home and spoon with
you.”

I smirked, and I fought for it not to turn into a wicked grin. “Damn, you’re thinking about that now, jeez, Lily.” He walked up to Rosie and bent his head close to her ear. Cody was used to getting his way with women. He could be charming and attentive, and he was extremely hot looking
too.

He took Rosie by the hand, his other hand gently placed at the small of her back as he led her toward the bar. I saw his hand go up from her back as he signaled with two fingers. The bartender placed two shot glasses and a bottle of tequila on the
bar.

Good boy, Cody had taken her to loosen her up a little before heading to the dance floor. Maybe he’d tell her that she had nothing to fear with our relationship, but if he did that, I knew he’d also tell her not to mess with it because she’d only get
hurt.

By the time Jack came back, he looked way more relaxed than when he went to the men’s room. “Okay, Lily, dance
time.”

I looked puzzled. “What about Rosie?” I wondered what he was doing and raised one eye
brow.

He looked over at the bar where she was standing. “What about her? If she can’t deal with us, then it’s best we figure that out now, don’t you t
hink?”

I shook my head. “Jack, that isn’t fair to her; you need to consider her feelings
too.”

Jack twisted his mouth, and sighed heavily. “Well, I was thinking about that.” He stared into my eyes. “What do we do? Do we hide how we feel about each other, so that someone else can be happy? What if that made
me
unhappy? What if I couldn’t ever be spontaneous around you? Or you, with me? Would you be happy with that?” I thought about what he was saying and realized that I had been upfront with Alfie about
Jack.

My thoughts were that Alfie had to deal with our friendship. It wasn’t even an option that I would cut
my
affection for Jack out of the equa
tion.

I understood how he felt, but it had to be Jack’s choice. I wasn’t going to ruin his happiness so that we could continue to flirt and cuddle. “Let’s put our other flower to the test. Either way, we’ll both know where we stand,” Jack said. It didn’t feel right to me to put Rosie in this situation, but Jack wasn’t giving me a way past
this.

He pulled me onto the dance floor and began dancing with me, his hands on my hips as we swayed to the music. His eyes flicked over to her. “Good sign, she’s not got her gun out yet.” He wi
nked.

I giggled. “You’re a bad man,
Jack.”

He snickered. “Not bad ass enough for you though, eh? I mean, I don’t have a bejeweled dick or anything like
that.”

His smile froze on his lips. “Sorry, honey, that was out before I thought about what I was saying. Don’t let it ruin the night.” I knew that Jack was joking, but he made reference to Alfie’s genital piercing. It was an innocent flirty joke from Jack, but his choice of humor left me feeling more than a little off bal
ance.

“C’mere.” He grabbed me and tugged me into his chest, his big strong arms wrapping around my waist. I inhaled Jack’s familiar scent. It was comforting, and his breath smelled of tequila and limes, as his mouth passed over my
face.

He kissed my forehead as we swayed to the slow music. “I wish I could wipe him out of your memory, h
oney.”

I swallowed hard before answering. “Me too, Jack, but I’m doing fine now.” I smiled up at
him.

“Sorry for the…” I shook my head. “No need, Jack, I know it was a slip.” We finished dancing, and I excused myself to go to the bath
room.

Rosie and Mandy were nowhere in sight. As I went to push the restroom door, I overheard Mandy tal
king.

“You have no idea. If you love Jack, then you’ll accept Lily. She is no threat to you, except if you try to come between them. Jack loves Lily like he would love his own child, with a whole layer of his heart, honey. If you want a layer of Jack’s heart, you’ll love her too. There will be no compromise on
that.”

I heard her use the toilet. “Those two would never cross the line into a sexual relationship. It’s complex but beautiful what they have. Accept it, or walk away, Rosie. Sooner or later you’ll realize
that.”

I pushed the door open and smiled when my eyes met Mandy’s. “Hey guys, what’s happening? Did you enjoy the gig, Rosie?” I could see that she was struggling, so I quickly added, “You don’t know what it means for Jack to invite a girl. You must be very special, Rosie.” She smiled, and I knew we were alright…for
now.

Holly and Brett showed up late to the club; she had gone straight to work after my graduation ceremony. Brett kissed my cheek. “Hiya beautiful, congratulations, sweeth
eart.”

I hugged Brett, and he signaled to the waitress, circling his arm around the drinks on our table. He made a small movement with his thumb and forefinger like he was holding a shot g
lass.

She nodded and went to get shots for everyone. She brought back a bottle of tequila, some salt and limes, and a bottle of Jack Dani
el’s.

It was comical watching my mother take a shot of tequila. Jack quipped, “Way to go Roslyn, my turn for some of that dirty dancing
next.”

He winked, and my mother nearly choked at the thought. My dad smirked and muttered, “Yeah, and I get to swap with R
osie.”

Lennon’s eyes went wide with surprise. “Jesus, you are all incestuous, and they say that some parts of America are full of inbred folks.” Everyone chuckled, staring at Lennon and his attempt at making a
joke.

Digs chuckled and his eyes flew over to the far side of the bar, narrowed then flicked back to Jack. His head nodded in the direction he wanted Jack to look at. I followed Jack’s gaze and f
roze.

Elle was walking toward me with a grin on her face, looking pleased with her-self. “Hey!” She smirked at me and the surprised look I must have been sporting. “Well, well, and what do we have here?” She glanced at my half- drunk parents, smirked and rolled her eyes, nodded briefly at Jack, before sweeping in for a tight
hug.

“You didn’t really think I was going to miss your big day, did you?” Tears sprung to my eyes, but I was completely stoked that she had come to se
e me.

Drew stood behind her, his hand on her shoulder, smiling at me nervously. He looked affluent, and well-groomed. When Elle moved aside, Drew and I had a hesitant moment before he rushed for
ward.

“Come here, you,” he cooed, his large arms wrapping around me as he tugged me in tightly against his c
hest.

Drew kissed the top of my head. “I hear you’ve been doing great things honey.” He rubbed the back of my shoulder while he spoke to me. It was great to see him but painful at the same
time.

This was the first time I’d seen anyone from Alfie’s band since the last time we were here in the club well over a year
ago.

I promised myself a happy day, and I wasn’t going to let anything upset me. “Yeah, well, Elle tells me that you’ve been busy too. She seems to be somewhere different every time I try to meet up with
her.”

It was the best I could do. I didn’t want to talk about his band. I hated that our conversation was strained, but everything else I’d done was the same as when he
left.

Louie sent my parents, Jack, and Rosie back to their hotel in his car. The driver came back for me and the guys afterwards and drove us all to Lennon’s place. We had all arranged to stay at his house tonight, so that we’d be able to organize the food for a cookout for all of our friends and my parents tomo
rrow.

Lennon was lucky enough to have a pool, and I was really looking forward to sitting around it and spending some quality downtime with Jack and my par
ents.

When we all got to Lennon’s, Digs crashed on a large metal hammock that looked really comfortable but sat randomly in the corner of the large sitting
room.

He was out like a light. Shawn stretched up with his hands above his head, his t-shirt riding up out of his dark blue jeans. He let out a loud grunt. “I guess I’ll go upstairs and get naked, no bathrooms down here for me to wander in and out of anyway.” He winked then flashed us a cheeky
grin.

Cody punched him in the side of the arm. “Dang, Shawn you mean we’ll miss out on that cute way you scratch your nuts when you’re looking for something?” I snickered but kept my mouth
shut.

Lennon, Cody, and I flopped down on his large sectional after he found some sodas and water for us to drink. “Great night, Lily. Your folks are a hoot. I’m just a teeny bit jealous of you and everyone that you have around
you.”

I knew that Lennon’s dad had skipped out on his mom and him when he was little. “You don’t have to be jealous Lennon, they’re your folks as well now; we’re fa
mily.”

I got up and sat on his knee, planting a kiss on his forehead. I heard him swallow audibly at my gesture, before his eyes met mine. A slow smile spread on his lips. “You have no idea what that means t
o me.”

We sat around talking about how the band could be better. We discussed how we should deal with the loads of song material we had, and I agreed to call Barney next week. This should give us time to select and record a demo tape of the best of what we had to showcase XrAid at Barney’s l
abel.

We talked about what we could do to raise the profile of the band. Cody muttered, “Pity about the fest
ival.”

Lennon shot him a look, and Cody winced briefly, then his face went passive. Lennon sat forward on the couch. His hands placed between his open knees and rubbed his hands together. “Festival? What festival?” I looked puzzled at both of them wondering what in the hell they were talking a
bout.