Existing (46 page)

Riley shoots a glance at me and Ashley and nods. He stands up, holds his arms out wide, and says, “Ladies, who wants to do some shots?”

For once, Riley is doing the one thing I actually w
ant him to do. I wait until he and the girls are out of earshot before I turn to face Ashley again. “Why have you brought them?” I say, nodding towards the girls.

He chuckles. “
They look like fun.”

“They look like skanks.”

He shrugs. “Where is the fun in hanging out with the kind of girls that are afraid to move in case their hair falls out of place? Skanks are fun.”

I shake my head in confusion. “Why are you even hanging around with girls anyway?”

“Girls are bitchy,” he tells me. “And I love a good bitching session.”

I shake my head. “
So what was so important that I had to meet you in a bar at this time of night?”

Ashley’s face suddenly goes serious and I feel the panic start to uncurl in my stomach. I can immediately tell that he’s about to tell me something that I’m not going to like.

“I’m just gonna come right out and say it,” he tells me.

“Okay.”

“I told Mr. Parker.”

At first I
think he means that he’s told Parker that he’s gay, but why would Ashley be so adamant that we meet tonight? And then it hits me. He’s told him about Rose. I start to shake my head. “Please tell me you haven’t told him about Rose?”

“I’m sorry,” he says, pushing his hands through his hair. “He caught me at a really weird time
, and he started asking me questions about her and it just sort of came out.”

“It just came out?!” I shout. “
How the fuck did Rose’s biggest secret just come out?”

“Shit,” he huffs. “I know I shouldn’t have
said anything and I’m sorry, but someone needed to know, Cabe. We’ve known for too long and not done anything about it. I didn’t mean to tell him, but I’m glad I did. I hope he does something about it.”

“Fucking hell, Ashley,” I hiss. “This isn’
t what we planned.”

“I know,” he sighs. “But I couldn’t stand waking up every morning and walking into school
, wondering if I would see any new bruises on Roisin’s face. It was killing me, knowing someone was hurting her and none of us were doing anything about it.”

“We
were
doing something about it. We were going to wait until we knew she would be safe. We were going to wait until we were sure Ava and Rose were away from Hallie before we did anything.”

“I know all of that,” he says, “but nothing was actually happening, was it? W
e said all the right things, Cabe, but none of us actually fucking did anything about it.”

“She could hurt her for this.”

“For what?”

“What if it doesn’t get investigated properly?” I ask. “What if Hallie catches wind of it and punishes Rose for telling someone?”

Ashley’s face falls. “That’s not gonna happen. Mr. Parker will tell the appropriate people and Rose will get help.”

“You’re an idiot,” I tell him. I know I’m being harsh, but how could he do all of this without telling us
? And how can he think that Rose will be fine with this? We’ve all been meeting and talking about her behind her back, and ultimately, we were going to say and do things that would change her and Ava’s life. She’ll never forgive us.

“So what did Parker say after you told him?” I realise that I don’t actually know how much Ashley has said and shake my head. “Actually, start from the beginning. What did you tell him about Rose and then what did he say?”

Ashley picks up Riley’s bottle of beer and takes a big swig. “Parker was asking about Rose’s knee, and then he asked about the bruise to her face. I remembered what Charlotte had said about how he was talking to her in Anatomy once, looking like he was about to kiss her.”

“And?”
I push.

“And I told him that she told each of us different things
about her injuries.”

I let my face fall into my hands.

“And then what?”

A
shley lifts the bottle and drains the beer. He slams it onto the table and huffs. “And then I told him the truth. All of it.”

“You told him it was Hallie?”

He nods. “I told him about Hallie. I told him about the car crash and why she was running from her house. I told him fucking everything.”

I could kill him. The careless little git wasn’t thinking about what was best for Rose.
At all. “What did Parker say?” I can hear the anger in my voice and how it makes my words shake.

“He wants me to write it all down and then he says he’s going to tell the police.”

“Shit,” I say. “Fuck. Shit. Fuck, Ashley!”

He holds his hands up. “
I know I shouldn’t have. I just didn’t know what else to do.”

“What happened to us sitting her Dad down and telling him everything? What happened to making sure Rose and Ava were at my house while we did it
, so Hallie couldn’t get to them? What the fuck happened to our plans, Ashley?”

“I screwed them up,”
he sighs in defeat. “Is that what you want to hear, Cabe?”

I shake my head.

“Why is it that you’re the one that gets to decide what happens in her life? Why do we all have to do what you say anyway?” he asks.

“Because I know her
, and I’m trying to do what I think is best for Rose.”

“Yeah,” he says, “well I know her too.”

I open my mouth but shut it again. I lean back in my chair and try to think about what we’re going to do. “You’re going to have to speak to Parker,” I tell him. “You’re going to have to tell him that you’re worried about what might happen to Rose or something.”

“That’s not going to work,” he says.

“It’ll have to. We need more time.”

“Rose doesn’t,” he says.

I look up at him and frown. “What do you mean?”

“She doesn’t need more time,” he says. “To
morrow morning she could get the beating of all beatings, and then how guilty would you feel?”

I start to shake my head.

“You’d feel like shit, Cabe. And you’d feel like shit because you’d known all this time and hadn’t done anything. Her scars would be there forever, along with your guilt.”

When I walk down the road from Ava’s school, I see a little blue car idling at the side of the road. It’s familiar to me, but it’s not until I’m right next to it that I remember who it belongs to. I peep through the window and see Gina staring at me. I wave.

She nods toward
the door, which squeaks as I open it.

“
Rose, darling.”

I smile at her.
“Hi, Gina.”

“So,” she says, “you told Charlotte.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m sorry about that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” she says quickly, “but we need to go to your house.”

“Why?”

“Your Mother won’t leave me alone. She obviously has something else she wants to say.”

I shake my head. “We can’t go home. Hallie is there.”

“Oh,
” she says. “Um, okay. Get in and we’ll go to my friend’s house. She won’t mind.”

I open the back door and usher
Ava in. Gina greets Ava as awkwardly as she did the first time, and then begins driving down the road.

“Will my M
other know where to go?” I ask.

Gina nods.

We drive down the smooth ocean road and continue through the center of town. I turn around and check on Ava, who has pulled her Nintendo out of her bag, and seems to be oblivious about anything else that is going on around her.

“I’m s
orry about your accident.”

I glance again at
Ava before nodding at Gina.

“Can I ask you a question?”
she says.

“Yes.”

“Why were you in the street with no shoes or socks on?”

I look out of the window and watch the trees fly by. I glance at the speedometer and
realize that we’re doing fifty. When I look up the road again, I recognize that we’re on the highway to Portland.

“Where are
we going?” I ask, not answering her previous question.

Gina laughs. “
Don’t worry. There’s a turn off - just down here. It’s only another mile or so.”

I nod.

“So,” she says again, “no shoes or socks?”

I take a deep breath. “I found the diary and read it. When I confronted my Father about what was in there
, we argued and I ran.”

Gina sucks in a short, sharp breath and turns the car off the highway and down a dusty lane.

“What was in there?” she asks.

My eyes dart to
Ava and I shake my head. Even though it might look like she’s not listening, I know her better than that. I know she’d pretend she wasn’t listening and then just start asking questions later about it.

Gina s
kids to a stop outside a trailer that looks like it’s been dumped in the middle of nowhere.

“Does someone actually live
here?” I ask, blinking at the red and yellow box of tin.

“Yup,” says Gina
, climbing out of the car. “Don’t judge.”

I shake my head. “I wasn’t.” I pull
Ava out of the back and hold on tight to her little hand.

“Where are we
, Rose?” asks Ava, looking around the strange place.

“We are just going to s
ee a lady about that party I told you about for my friend.”

She nods. “Can I
keep playing my game?”

“Yes,” says Gina. “My friend Willow will play with you.”

We walk up to the rusty, red door, but before we’ve even knocked, the door swings open.

“Gina!” The bald-
headed woman bends down, pulling her violet and pink skirt away from her knees and kisses Gina quickly on both cheeks.

“Willow,” says Gina. “How lovely to see you
again, and thank you for letting us use your house. We won’t be long. It’s a newbie.”

Willow nods. “A
h, okay. Should I wait in your car or something?”

Gina nods and hands over her keys. “Can you keep an eye on the little one?”

Willow eyes Ava up and down and then smiles. “Sure. She’s not going to be any trouble. She’ll ask a few questions, but nothing I can’t handle.”

Willow glances up at me
, and the smile that was spread across her face slides right off. My eyes dart from her to Gina and then back again. “Hello,” I whisper, “I’m Rose.”

Willow breathes in deeply
and closes her eyes. “Oh dear God, child.”

“What?”
I ask, feeling panicked.

“Willow,” warns Gina,
“you cannot change the future.”

“Future?”
I ask.

Willow shakes her head and places her hand firmly on my shoulder. “Don’t let them break you. Don’t be taken. Fight with everything you have. Look around and see what’s become of you. You’re stronger than anyone I’ve met before. Know that and you’ll be fine.”

I stand in the middle of the dusty path with my mouth hanging open, watching Willow and Ava walk to Gina’s car.

“Don’t ask,” says Gina. “I mean it.”

I shut my mouth and follow Gina inside the tin shack. Once inside, I feel like I’ve been transported back in time. Weird incense sticks burn out around us, making me wrinkle up my nose. A kitchen made up of only three cabinets and a single gas burner is on my left, and a bathroom with a shower only big enough for an elf is on my right. We move down the narrow hallway and past a rectangle-shaped bed that’s covered in black bed sheets until we get to a small seating area and a small, square table that folds down from the wall.

“Take a seat,
” she says.

I slide o
nto the cushioned seat, feeling like I’m about to catch some sort of disease, and hold my hands out for Gina like we did before.

Gina shuffles for
ward and grabs my wrists. “She doesn’t have long,” she whispers.

I look up
, but before I can ask the question that’s burning in my throat, the heat swamps my hands and powers up my arms.

“Rose.”

“Mom?” I smile and listen to every lovely musical note that comes from her voice. “Hi.”

“Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry about what happened. I feel like it was my fault. I shouldn’t have asked you to look for the diary.”

I shake my head. “It wasn’t your fault, Mom.”

“I’m sorry
, Rose, but it doesn’t end there.”