Exquisite Betrayal (31 page)

He holds my hand against his face. “She said
it was too hard to hear Mum’s name all the time so she asked not be
called that anymore.”

Tears fill my eyes as I think about Tilly’s
pain as well as Ryland Thomas’s. I want to crawl on him and hug him
close just to comfort him. “Can you pull over a minute?” He does
and I do exactly what I wanted to do.

“
I needed to hug you. It didn’t feel
right not being able to do that.”

“
I wish I’d have had you to hold on to
when they were killed.” I lean back to look at him, and notice how
his eyes contain such agony and how that little place between them
is deeply creased. My fingers massage that tiny area, trying to
ease his tension and pain. “I had to be strong for Tilly and I was
busting apart at the seams, Fallon. I was only eighteen and trying
to hold it together…” He stops to breathe.

“
You have me now. I’m here, Ryland
Thomas.”

“
I know.”

We simply sit together like that for quite
some time, me straddling his lap and holding him in my arms.

“
You know, Tilly always thought I was
the strong one, when all along it was really her. I only held
myself together because of her. I did it all for her. If it hadn’t
been for Tilly, I don’t know what I would’ve done.”

“
You would’ve done what I did. Taken
one day at a time. You know our parents all died the same year.
It’s strange when I think of that, but you have to give it some
reason. I mean, for you, Ryland Thomas, all your life experiences
have added to the richness of your novels. Can you honestly say you
could write what you do had you not lived through the shit you went
through?”

“
Probably not.”

“
So, in a way, in dying, your parents
gave you a gift. Their death wasn’t in vain.”

“
I suppose not.”

“
And even though your relationship
with Iris sucked… okay, bad word. Sorry. But even though she
cheated on you, the pain you felt has somehow enriched your
writing. I can feel it in your books. Your writing is true, Ryland
Thomas. It’s from the heart. So it wasn’t all for
nothing.”

“
I love you, Fallon.”

“
Endlessly.”

The advanced copies of novels are piled two
feet thick on my desk and I’m up to my eyeballs in reviews when
Kristie walks into my tiny cubby of an office.

“
So how was the spa
weekend?”

“
Awesome. Sonoma is really
unbelievable. The coastline is incredibly beautiful.”

“
Yeah, isn’t it? I love it there. I
love Mendocino, too. Get him to take you up there next time. Look,
I know you’re swamped today, but Ruth wants to see you.”

“
Sure. When?”

“
Now?”

“
Okay.” I get up and follow Kristie to
the elevator, up three floors where enter the executive level.
“I’ve never been up here.”

“
Yeah, well, don’t get too excited,”
she mumbles.

We wind our way down and around a couple of
halls until we get to a reception area where an administrative
assistant sits in the middle. There are four offices behind
her.

“
Hi, Leslie. Ruth knows we’re
coming.”

“
Okay. Let me buzz her.” Leslie picks
up the phone and tells Ruth we’re here. “Go on in. She’s ready for
you.”

We walk in her office. It’s huge,
overlooking the bay with a view of the Golden Gate Bridge. I guess
I’m dazed because she looks at me and says, “Pretty decent, isn’t
it?”

“
I’ll say.”

“
Have a seat, ladies.”

Kristie and I sit across from her in the two
chairs that face her desk.

“
First off, Fallon, I want you to know
how pleased we are with your work here at Critics Abound. Your
reviews are exceptional and we know we made the right choice in
hiring you. You’ve been with us now for six months and we want to
put into motion our author spotlight that Kristie had mentioned to
you. We want you to spearhead it with an interview with R.T.
Sinclair. I know you love her writing and that you two are on
friendly terms, so I’m sure we at Critics Abound can count on you
to do a marvelous job here. I also want to give you this.” She
hands me an oblong box. I take it from her and hold it a minute.
“Go on, open it.”

I unwrap it and inside is a leather
portfolio with latest version of the iPad. It’s very lovely. “Oh
my. This is really nice, but I already have an iPad Mini.”

“
Well, this is much better than the
mini and we want to reward you for doing such a great job. You can
use it in your interviews so you don’t have to lug your laptop
around. It’ll be a lot more convenient for you. We loaded Pages on
it so you can type all your documents up in it as well.”

“
I don’t know what to say.”

“
You don’t have to say anything. Just
go and get that interview for us. Critics Abound is ranked number
two among all the literary critics and I want us to be number one.
I mean it, Fallon. I’m willing to go to all lengths to get us
there. Are you following me?” She smiles. For some reason I feel
like I’m getting ready to get eaten for breakfast. Her pointy teeth
look threatening and her eyes are not at all friendly like I want
them to be.

“
I’ll do my best.”

“
I don’t want your best. I want you to
make it happen, Fallon.”

I nod, feeling the threat of her words.
Kristie and I leave. When we hit the elevator, Kristie says, “You
know there are strings attached to everything, don’t you?”

“
I-I guess,” I stutter. I’m not
exactly sure what she means.

“
Just do the interview as best you
can, Fallon. Ruth isn’t someone you want on your bad
side.”

“
What does that mean,
Kristie?”

“
Let’s just say that things can get
pretty miserable if she doesn’t get what she wants.”

I look at Kristie, feeling like there’s
something else she wants to say, though she doesn’t. We part ways
as she goes to her office and I go to mine, trying to reason out
what’s just happened.

***

Two weeks later, Tilly and I are sitting in
her favorite restaurant, eating a leisurely dinner that’s my treat
for a change. Actually, it’s Critics Abound’s treat because this is
the night I’m interviewing her.

“
I promised you I wouldn’t dig for
this and I’m not. My boss’s boss wants me to get the real scoop on
you, you know. But I told Kristie that I wouldn’t exploit our
relationship. Wouldn’t they all just die if they knew the
truth?”

We both laugh, hard and loud, and I
toast her for her latest success,
My Love
For Her.

“
I’ve never seen Ryland Thomas so
happy, Fallon.”

“
I’ve never been this happy, Tilly.
He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“
He says the same about you. He told
me you ran into Iris in Sonoma and what happened.”

“
Yeah. It turned out okay. I think it
worked in our favor, actually.”

“
You two think so much alike. Do you
realize that?”

I shrug. “I don’t think about it, I
guess.”

“
So?”

“
So what?”

“
When are you gonna do it?”

“
Do what?”

“
Tie the big knot?”

I blush. It’s weird, too, because I think
about it all the time, but we never talk about it.

“
He ties me in knots everywhere,
Tilly.”

“
I hope you mean figuratively because,
if you mean literally, I’m just gonna say, ewww!”

“
No! I don’t mean he ties me up! But
now that you mention it, I might…”

“
Stop! He’s my brother for Christ’s
sake. Bloody hell, Fallon. Are you trying to gross me
out?”

I giggle and say, “Yeah.”

“
Has he asked you to marry him
yet?”

“
No. We don’t talk about
it.”

“
Ah, I see. He will,” she says smugly,
like she knows something I don’t. “So yeah, his book is doing
phenomenally well and I am so damned excited for him. I think it’s
you. He wrote
My Love For Her
after he met you. You do know there are so many shades of you
in it.”

“
Yeah, I know. So, let’s get this
interview over with. What do you want me to write about? I know you
don’t want anything about your love life, right?”

“
Just put down that I’m very single at
the moment and looking for an incredibly hot, eligible bachelor.
That will do. And then the usual. My favorite stuff to do, places
to eat, things to see, etc. How’s that? And you can write about
where I grew up.”

“
I’d love that. Tell me about growing
up in London.”

So she talks and I take copious notes on my
iPad throughout dinner. A couple of hours and a bottle and a half
of wine later, I have enough to write a very informative spotlight
on Tilly, a.k.a. R.T. Sinclair.

“
By George, I think I’ve got it,” I
say in my best British accent.

“
You’re gonna have to work on that a
bit. Sounds bloody awful, like Julia Child gone south.”

We both laugh as we leave the restaurant. My
phone beeps and I look at it to see a text from Ryland Thomas.

“
Let me guess. It’s my horny
brother.”

“
You know it.”

I text him back that I’m on the way.

“
It must be nice to be in
love.”

“
Tilly, I wish there were words. It’s
more than just love with Ryland Thomas.”

We hug and I head home.

***

Ruth stops by my cubby-office the next
afternoon to check on my progress with the spotlight on R.T..

“
So when do you think it’ll be ready
for proofing?”

“
Tomorrow.”

“
You have a deadline, so don’t be
late.”

“
No worries, Ruth.”

“
I know I can count on
you.”

She leaves and I’m left with the cold
feeling of pin pricks on my skin. Kristie comes in right away and
asks about my progress.

“
What’s with everyone on this
spotlight thing? If you all don’t think I can do it, why did you
assign it to me?”

Kristie looks at me and fidgets, but then
says, “I know it’ll be great, Fallon.” She smiles, though it’s an
empty one. Is it my imagination, or are things a little eerie
around here?

I don’t have time to spend worrying about
it. I’m back to my spotlight article, honing it and making it
shine. I want it to be absolutely flawless, not so much for me, but
for Ryland Thomas and Tilly. I want the world to see what wonderful
people they are. I put the finishing touches on it and forward it
to both Kristie and Ruth.

Now I have to focus on reviews because I’m
so backed up I don’t know what to do. I text Ryland Thomas and
explain that I’ll be late tonight, so I won’t be seeing him and
send a sad face along with it. He sends me two back and tells me he
misses me already.

It’s after ten when I leave, and the office
is dark and empty. I get home and crawl in bed. I call Ryland
Thomas because I need to hear his voice before I drop off to sleep.
We chat for a few and then it’s lights off.

***

Two and a half weeks later, on a Thursday,
I’m sitting at my desk when my phone fires up. I’ll remember this
day for the rest of my life. It’s August and I’m thinking that it’s
been almost exactly one year since I’ve met Ryland Thomas and oh,
what a difference a year makes. I glance at my phone and see it’s
Kat. I’m super excited to see her name because the Wicked Wenches
Con is coming up in two more weeks and I get to see my girls
again.

“
Kat! I was gonna call you this
week.”

“
I can’t believe it! I cannot believe
you never told me all of that. How could you keep that a secret for
so long? Oh my God, Fallon!”

“
What are you talking
about?”

“
You know. R.T.! Ryland
Thomas.”

“
What!” My heart starts hammering so
hard I know it’s going to crack a hole right through my
ribcage.

“
Your spotlight is on the front page
of every website and journal publication everywhere. You broke the
news about R.T. being a man,” Kat says.

“
What did you just say?”

“
The article you wrote. Your interview
with R.T.”

“
Fuck. Shit. Motherfucker!” I
shout.

“
Fallon! What’s wrong?”

“
I didn’t write that.”

“
What? What do you mean? It’s
everywhere.”

I jump online and go to all my links where
the published article would be and sure enough, as I start reading,
the article is nothing similar to the one I turned into Kristie and
Ruth.

“
I gotta go, Kat.”

I march into Kristie’s office and yell,
“What the fuck, Kristie!”

“
Fallon, I didn’t do it. It was
Ruth.”

I don’t wait for her to say anything else.
I’m out her door and running down the aisle, heading for the
elevator. I hear her calling my name, but I pay her no heed. My
finger is punching the elevator button, willing the door to open.
The world is crashing down around me and I have to stop it. I ride
the elevator three floors up and head straight to Ruth’s
office.