Faith and Fidelity (13 page)

They pulled into the driveway at quarter past five. As the headlights swept across the front of the house, Evan saw a figure standing on the stoop and he smiled. There was no mistaking the tall, broad-shouldered form, weighed down with bags.

“Hey! It's Matt!” Elizabeth squealed from the backseat, waking Danny and Kathleen up from their naps.

Evan barely had time to put the car in park before the doors opened and the kids spilled out. He watched Elizabeth and Danny race over to slam into Matt's legs, nearly knocking him over with the force of their hugs. Evan watched him drop his bags, reach down to pick up both kids at the same time, swing them around until they shrieked.

Evan just wanted to sit there for hours and watch them all together, but he shut off the engine and got out of the car. As he walked up the driveway, he caught Matt's eye.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Matt said breathlessly, giving the twins one last shake, dropping them on the stoop.

There was nothing to say... nothing they could say with the kids milling around, shoving one another toward the front door. Evan elbowed his way through the crowd, got his keys out. Herded his brood into the house. Matt brought up the rear, picking up his bags. Evan paused in the doorway, let Matt bump into him. He heard the quick intake of breath, let it warm him.

“I missed you.”

The words were so softly spoken that Evan could barely make them out. But he knew the feeling. He felt it too.

Evan kept walking, let Matt in and shut the door.

Vic Wolkowski showed up twenty minutes later. His kids were off on a trip to Europe with his late wife's sister and he'd spent the day with an elderly aunt. He walked in with enough bakery cookies to feed all of Queens.

Seeing Matt he lit up. “Hey, Matty! Had no idea you were going to be here.” Vic dropped his coat over a chair. “I didn't realize you guys were that close.”

Evan turned on his heel and walked into the kitchen where Matt saw he was pretending to check the coffee machine. Like it was a nuclear warhead that needed his attention.

Bastard.

Chicken.

“Since we... uh... met at Abe's retirement party, we just started... you know... hanging out... ” Matt knew he was sweating. And he was fully aware he sounded like he was hiding something. Which he was.

Vic pursed his lips. Nodded thoughtfully. Turned to Evan, who continued to stare at the Mr. Coffee. “Hey, how long till the coffee's done? I want to crack open those cookies.”

Vic was on his third cup of coffee and unknown number cookie. He, Evan, and Matt sat at the table, relaxing, shooting the shit. Matt felt so comfortable, in this kitchen, with these men. The kids were in the living room, laughing uproariously at something on television. Occasionally Elizabeth or Danny would wander in and lean against Matt's chair, ask him some silly question, steal a cookie from his plate. Kathleen came in for more sodas, casually asked Matt how long he was staying.

Matt did his very best to keep his eyes locked on the plate of cookies. After what he felt was an appropriate amount of time, he looked up, caught Evan's eye— shit— and said, “Uh, we'll see... what you kicking me out already?”

The doorbell rang at that moment and Matt said a prayer of heartfelt thanksgiving.

Helena and Serena Abbot stood on the doorstep, bearing even more food.

“Well, at least I don't have to shop for awhile,” Evan quipped, taking the filled-to-the-top shopping bags from them.

Introductions were made all around. Matt flashed a smile at Helena and a bigger one at her mother. He was good at charming the moms. Serena shook everyone's hand then asked where the kitchen was so she “could get some food on the table,” like they were all starving to death. Matt smirked at Evan as a suddenly flustered Vic Wolkowski offered “to help her out.”

They went into the kitchen, leaving Matt, Helena, and Evan standing in a half circle in the entryway. Matt felt slightly nauseous. Helena was smiling so brightly it hurt his eyes.

After some genial small talk, she turned and winked. “Sooo... Evan... ” Helena said, elbowing her partner. “Is she here yet?”

Matt's eyes narrowed. Evan look at the ceiling, refused to meet Matt's stare.

“Uh, no. Not here.” Evan cleared his throat. “Yet. Not here yet.”

Helena, eyebrows raised, cast a glance at Matt, who was trying to relax his facial muscles.

“Okaayy. Is she coming?”

“Yeah.” With that Evan turned and walked into the kitchen, where Matt presumed he was going to monitor the coffee machine again.

Helena turned to Matt, her eyes narrowed. “What's up with him?”

Matt shrugged and quickly followed. He was never going to make it through this evening without dropping dead.

Helena didn't say much for the rest of the evening. Her detective radar was pinging like crazy. She listened to Vic and Matt tell funny stories about old cases, entertaining her mother— who played the wide-eyed civilian to her flirty best. Evan laughed along and Helena realized this was the most relaxed she'd seem him in ages (his weirdness when she showed up aside).

She checked the clock and realized that it was edging toward ten o'clock and she very much doubted the “mystery girl” was showing up... thus reinforcing her underlying terror that
she
, Helena Abbot, was said mystery girl, that her partner, her dearest friend, her model for the “ideal man"— he was like her freaking brother for God's sake— was developing romantic feelings for.

Oh God, she didn't want to go there. Didn't want to have the conversation she sensed was coming. Yes, she fully appreciated the fact that Evan Cerelli was a beautiful, beautiful man— inside and out (especially the out because she was not blind). Yes, finding a straight, single, non-sociopathic man in New York City was akin to locating shoes in your size during a sale at Bloomies— frankly impossible. But, while this was the rational Helena understanding these points, emotional Helena couldn't get past the fact that this was Evan. The guy who teased her about her slavish devotion to street vendor hot dogs and her spider fears and calmed her down during her more crazed moments and who taught her how to be a great detective. He was... he was her mentor and her brother and she just could not move from friends to lovers with him. Couldn't.

She saw Evan glance at the clock and thought he would make some excuse about the “mystery girl” but instead he gave Matt a smile and got up to announce bedtime to the kids in the other room.

“Hey, Danny, Elizabeth, Kathleen— let's go. Bedtime.”

Groans met the pronouncement but Helena heard shuffling. The kids filed in to say their good nights and Helena watched with interest as all three ran over to give Matt hugs and kisses. She had no idea Matt had spent time with the kids. Strange that Evan had never mentioned that.

And then Helena heard Danny say, “Hey Matt— you gonna be here when we wake up like last time?”

It wasn't so much the words that made her take notice, Helena realized— it was Matt and Evan's reaction. The furtive glances, the “quick” recovery and non-answer.

“Well... it's not snowing again is it? Like last time?” Matt croaked.

And then Evan shepherded the kids upstairs. Miranda came in soon after and said her good nights, then followed the rest of the family upstairs. Matt made some vague comment about more coffee and got up.

Helena blinked.
What the hell was that?

Wolkowski and her mom were still chatting, and seemed to have missed... whatever... just happened. Helena just sat here, rubbing her hands against her coffee mug. She let her attention drift to the conversation at the other end of the table— her mother was describing a recent trip to France with some college friends— dimly aware of Matt returning to the table.

She gave him a smile and watched him try to respond. He could barely meet her eyes.

“Everything okay?”

“Oh yeah. Just tired... long day... yeah so, last time I was here was when we had that big storm— two weeks ago was it, and uh, got snowed in, had to stay here... babysat the kids the next day for Evan... ” Matt rambled, gesturing with his hands.

Something clicked in Helena's head but before she could process the information Evan returned to the kitchen and sat down between Helena and Matt.

His eyes darted back and forth between the two, then he cleared his throat. “So, Serena... Paris... how was that?” he said, in such a blatant attempt to turn attention away from himself that Helena did a double take.

“Oh it was wonderful... ” And with that Serena launched into an entertaining story about getting lost in the city and running into an old kindergarten friend— literally. Helena had heard this story about forty times so she cast her eyes around the room. Captain Wolkowski was staring at her mother like she invented oxygen and that was a little... icky. Matt and Evan were listening, nodding, smiling— perfect charmers those two boys. Knew how to impress the moms.

And then the smoke alarm went off.

They all jumped and Evan was out of his chair in a second. He made a motion for everyone to relax. “No, no, it's fine. I'm having some trouble with the alarm downstairs in the basement. I'll be right back.” He quickly ran down the basement steps.

The alarm stopped a few seconds later and Serena resumed her story.

“Uh, hey, Matt? Could you give me a hand down here?” Evan called from downstairs. Helena watched Matt get up and hustle over. She turned her attention to her mother's story.

Minutes passed and Serena and Captain Wolkowski were laughing merrily. Then Serena looked at the wall clock— it was just turning eleven and her eyes widened. “Oh no— look how late it got. Helena, darling, I really must get home. It's been a long day.” She patted Wolkowski's hand. “Although it's a terrible shame to tear myself away from such wonderful company.”

Helena saw her captain blush at her mother's flirting and couldn't get out of her chair quickly enough. Oh great. It was like your mother dating your teacher.

“I'll go down and tell Evan. I need a few minutes to talk to him, okay?”

Serena nodded. “Fine, honey.”

Helena walked down the basement steps, hearing more shared laughter behind her. She would really have to talk to her mother about this; it didn't seem like the best idea, for her to be flirting with Helena's boss. Lost in thought, she got to the bottom step and turned right, following the light in the far corner of the room.

She saw two shadows... Matt and Evan... and began processing. Two shadows... awfully close together. Two bodies, standing close together... Matt and Evan, with their arms around one another... holding one another... Evan had one hand on the back of Matt's neck, and they were... kissing.

Helena came to a dead halt. Evan and Matt were kissing. Passionately, erotically kissing. She saw tongues.

Lightening fast the pieces fell into place. Evan had never actually mentioned dating a woman before his big admission about the mystery woman's developing feelings., just hanging out a lot with Matt... the big snow storm... the person he had feelings for, the complicated relationship... going home to talk to the person... Danny said Matt had been there when they woke up... spent the day... Thanksgiving— she'd meet the...

“Oh my God.” Helena couldn't help the gasp. “Oh my God.”

She watched as the two men pulled apart, turned and saw her. Saw their panic, and began sputtering—

“No, no... sorry... Oh God... I didn't realize. I didn't
realize
... ” she choked out. “You two?”

Evan moved toward her, his face white. “Helena... ” He couldn't get the words out. His mouth moved but nothing came out. “I... I was going to tell you... tonight... ”

Helena managed to clamp her jaw shut. She could see they were both flipping out— Matt looked like he was eight seconds away from heart failure— and she made a calming gesture with her hands.

“Oh listen... it's fine... it's fine... I just had no idea... I thought... ” Suddenly the hilarity of it hit her— believing that Evan was in love with her— and she started to giggle. “Oh God.”

Evan blinked at her. “What... ?”

Helena laughed so hard she had to hold her side. “I thought... When you said it was complicated... and you wouldn't tell me who she was... I thought... oh God... I thought it was me!”

“You?! Jesus Helena— that's like incest or something.” Evan managed to say.

“I know!” She gestured toward Matt. “This is... great. Really. It's just a big surprise.”

“Welcome to the club,” Matt said drily, finally speaking.

Evan threw up his hands. “This isn't the way I wanted this to come out... I wanted us to really talk, Helena, to explain that this... ” he gestured toward Matt and Helena caught a tender look on his face that did a funny thing to her stomach. “This is why I've been so crazy.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“You know what I mean.”

Matt rolled his eyes at Helena.

Helena wiped her eyes. “So this... this is a thing? Like a dating thing?”

Matt and Evan exchanged shy looks.

“Uh, yeah... yeah. Right now, it's... this thing that we're uh... having.”

“A thing we're having? So eloquent Detective Cerelli. Really. I'm getting fucking choked up over here.” Matt groused.

Evan shook his head then gave Helena the skunk eye. “You thought I meant you? In the hallway?”

Helena nodded.

“I didn't.”

“I know.”

“I haven't given you signals because I don't think of you... in that way... We're friends... ”

“I know. And I'm not disappointed or anything. I like my men stupid and dangerous, Evan. You're way too straight for me.”

Matt snorted.

“What?” Evan asked, turning to look at him.

“Nothing,” Matt said innocently.

“Does anyone else know?”

“No. Just you. You sure you're okay with this?”

“Evan, jeeze— I'm not homophobic or anything like that. It's a big shock— quite unexpected, but all I want is for you to be happy. That's all. There are no strings attached to that sentiment.” She paused, shrugged. “Well, one string. You can't ever think lustful thoughts about me.”