Authors: Ellen Hopkins
Tags: #Juvenile Fiction, #Family, #General, #Orphans & Foster Homes, #Social Issues, #Adolescence, #Drugs; Alcohol; Substance Abuse
WHAT, EXACTLY, DID I DO?
I mean, yeah, I told her, “Fuck you.”
But that was heat of the moment,
and I said I was sorry. I can’t
believe she has such a short fuse.
She’ll cool off and it will all be
fine, right? First things first.
I need a shower. The bathroom
is so Nikki—green and yellow
and messy and smelling of ginger.
The water heater is old and Nikki’s
shampoo-condition-and-shave
routine pretty well emptied it.
I am barely rinsed by the time
the H
2
O fades from lukewarm
to frigid. Any other day, I’d be
mad. Today, all I can do is laugh.
I towel off giant goose bumps,
borrow a couple of swipes
of Nikki’s deodorant, use
her brush to spike my hair.
The face in the mirror is mine.
Yet somehow I feel disconnected
from the person wearing it. Nikki’s
words come back to me:
I don’t know
who you are.
So I ask Mirror
Man, “Who are you?” But he
just stares stupidly back at me.
Who am I? Don’t have a clue.
But I don’t have to figure
that out right now. I’m cold.
I have my own drawer in
Nikki’s dresser, where I keep
a few things for sleepovers.
I choose boxers. Wranglers.
A red long-sleeved tee.
Take
your shit.
No way. She’ll change
her mind. I leave the rest in
place, retrieve the fallen photo—
Nikki and me boarding at Mt. Rose.
Great day. There have to be more.
MIGHT AS WELL
Go home for a few hours,
I guess. It’s a twenty-five-
minute ride, so I twist one
up and by the time I pull
into the driveway, I feel
a whole helluva lot better.
At least until I go inside,
only to overhear Dad on
the phone.
You can’t be
serious, Marie. We’ve
discussed this a dozen
times.
…
Stop yelling at
me, please. Of course I
understand. I’m not stupid….
See? The minute I walk in
the door, they’re arguing.
There goes my nice little
buzz. I sneak past Dad’s
office into the kitchen. Sex
and stress—not to mention
weed—make a guy hungry.
And thirsty. I consider
snagging a beer, but Dad’s
already in a snit. Better stick
with a sandwich and root beer.
GOOD PLAN
Dad comes into the kitchen
while I’m still slopping
mayonnaise on the bread.
Hunter! Didn’t hear you
come in.
He reaches into
the fridge for one of the three
remaining Miller Lights.
“You were on the phone.
So what’s up in Vegas?”
He shakes his head.
A lot.
None of it good. In addition
to the ribs, Kristina’s jaw
is fractured. And the MRI
showed something unusual
in her brain. They have to do
more tests. Plus, the cops
went to her apartment, looking
for Ron. The manager
let them in. They didn’t find
Ron, but they did find
three grams of crystal meth
,
sitting right out in the open
on top of her dresser. Kristina
claims it must be Ron’s
,
but it was in her apartment
and he wasn’t. She could be
in some serious trouble.
Uh, yeah. A twice-convicted
felon in possession of
a substantial amount of ice?
Even if she’s telling the truth,
who’s going to believe her?
The question now arises,
“What about Donald and
David?” Kristina’s youngest
kids, ages eleven and seven.
Well, there is a major problem
,
isn’t there? If they catch Ron
,
he’s going away. This is felony
assault, on top of his record.
Kristina may be going away
too, and even if she isn’t, it will
be weeks before she’ll be
in a position to play mother
to those kids. So it basically
comes down to foster care
,
or …
His jaw clenches, and
every discernable muscle tenses.
“Or you and Mom take them
in.” No wonder they were
arguing. Impossible situation.
He nods.
Marie wants to bring
them home. It makes me so angry!
We both swore we’d never do it
again—not that we resent having
you, but we’re too old to be parents
of young children. The only alternative
I can think of is Jake and Misty.
But after what happened last time
,
it’s not really fair to ask them.