Finding Forgiveness (Finding Series, Book 4) (16 page)

***

Roman swallowed Hunter’s gasp of surprise and kept up the pressure on Hunter’s hole until his body accepted the invasion. The second the outer muscle gave way and his finger disappeared inside of Hunter to the first knuckle, Hunter sucked in a breath and his fingers dug into Roman’s upper arms. Roman didn’t move even a fraction of an inch as Hunter tried to adjust. When his eyes finally opened and he gave him a wobbly smile, Roman leaned down to kiss him. It wasn’t until Hunter began voraciously kissing him back that Roman let his finger slide in the rest of the way and while Hunter still tensed, he didn’t let up on consuming Roman’s mouth. The pressure on Roman’s finger was tight and his dick instantly hardened even more in excitement.

He slowly began sliding his finger in and out of Hunter, carefully gauging his reaction for anything beyond discomfort. But when Hunter actually began meeting his thrusts with a subtle shift of his hips, Roman began twisting his finger deep inside Hunter until he found the spot he was looking for. Hunter’s eyes flew open at the first brush over his prostate and on the second pass, his shocked gaze searched out Roman’s. By the third stroke, Hunter was gyrating his entire body trying to get more of what he was feeling.

“Roman,” he panted. “Please don’t stop.”

Roman had known from the way Hunter had fucked him senseless on more than one occasion that he would be the type to give every part of himself over to the experience and not hold anything back but seeing it actually happen without being lost in his own haze of lust was an incredible, heady experience. Pulling back enough to give Hunter a little bit of space, Roman kept one arm tucked beneath Hunter’s shoulders while the other continued to torture his sweet spot. Then he said, “Touch yourself, Hunter. Show me how good it feels.”

It was all Hunter seemed to have been waiting for because he quickly began yanking on his dick as he slammed his ass down on Roman’s finger. Roman used his distraction to add a second finger which Hunter didn’t protest in the slightest. The added pressure had Hunter gasping for air as Roman continued to finger the bundle of nerves and as Hunter’s hand feverishly worked to bring himself relief, his whole body began to sweat and shake. Moments later, he wailed as Roman pressed both his fingers against that one spot and Roman let out his own moan as ropes of Hunter’s come hit his own body. The orgasm went on and on as Hunter tried to milk every last drop from his cock as Roman continued to draw circles around his sensitive gland. When Hunter finally released his dick, Roman withdrew his arm from Hunter’s shoulders and leaned down to clean up the sticky white fluid that had pooled against his abdomen. He carefully withdrew his fingers from Hunter’s sated body and then wrapped an arm beneath Hunter to move him farther up the mattress.

Hunter had gone completely lax and his dreamy eyes couldn’t stay focused on Roman. Roman used the opportunity to run his hands all over Hunter’s soft skin. As lean as Hunter was, his body was actually quite strong and Roman couldn’t help but trace every well-defined muscle with first his fingers and then his mouth. By the time he’d made it back down to Hunter’s ass, Hunter had started to respond somewhat but mostly just to make it easier for Roman to access his body. So when Roman lifted Hunter’s legs up and draped them over his shoulders as he lay near the bottom of the bed, Hunter didn’t protest. Nor did he make a sound when Roman’s big hands separated the globes of his ass so he could see the little pink hole that was fluttering in nervous anticipation. Since it was clearly begging for his attention, Roman didn’t waste any time and as soon as his tongue swiped over the wrinkly flesh, Hunter let out a startled yell.

***

“Roman!” Hunter shouted for the second time as wet heat engulfed his body. But even though his brain was telling him what Roman was doing to him had to be wrong, his body had something else in mind entirely because his ass was lifting of its own accord and his thighs were gripping Roman for all they were worth. Every lick and suckle went through him like a knife, except instead of pain, it was pure, blissful pleasure. He managed to reach up to grab a hold of a pillow and shove it over his face just in time to stifle another scream as Roman’s tongue pressed inside of him. He hadn’t believed it could get any better than when Roman’s finger had pressed that spot deep inside of him but holy shit was he wrong. His dick was already hard as a rock again and the euphoria from his earlier orgasm had given way to a bone-wrenching need for more. Even though he didn’t think more was even possible considering what his first release had done to him.

Roman kept tongue fucking him and then took it up another level by pulling out his tongue just long enough to shove a finger into him and press on his prostate. “Roman, I can’t,” he cried out as fire burned through his veins.

He wasn’t sure if Roman was taking pity on him or if Roman was too turned on himself to continue because Roman suddenly released him and grabbed a condom. The sight should have had all of Hunter’s fear coming back but all he could think about was how it could possibly get any better. He watched as Roman spread some lube on his dick and then gently pressed some into Hunter’s body.

“Put your legs over my arms,” Roman said as he put his hands on either side of Hunter’s body. Hunter did as he was told and then licked his lips as Roman used his arms to spread his legs open. He felt Roman’s cock against his hole and the tension that he thought was gone came back in full force.

“Breathe out and push down on me,” Roman instructed. Hunter followed the gentle order and as soon as the breath left his body, he felt himself being opened and stretched. Pain coursed through him as Roman continued to push forward and Hunter was about to tell him to stop when his body suddenly seemed to buckle under the pressure and Roman sank farther inside of him. He tried to suck in air as the discomfort and odd sensation burned through his ass.

“Hunter, look at me,” Roman whispered. Just seeing the love in Roman’s eyes had Hunter’s body relaxing and then it was like he was drawing Roman in rather than trying to keep him out.

“Oh shit,” Hunter breathed when Roman was fully seated inside of him. It felt so strange and so good at the same time.

“Hunter,” Roman said again but this time his voice sounded uneven and strained. One look at Roman’s face told him why. Sweat dripped from his brow and his whole body seemed to tremble as he tried to keep himself still. With his legs being controlled by Roman, Hunter couldn’t easily reach Roman like he wanted to but as soon as he wrapped his hand around Roman’s neck, Roman got the message and leaned down to kiss him. As Roman’s body pressed down on his, Roman’s arms forced Hunter’s legs farther open and back and Hunter couldn’t stop the cry of pleasure that tore from his lips as the new angle allowed Roman in even deeper.

“I need to move, baby,” Roman whispered harshly.

Hunter could only nod but that was all it took for Roman to pull back before pushing forward again. The burning sensation built every time Roman slid into him but it quickly changed to something else as wisps of pleasure started firing under his skin. Roman’s lips were hovering just above his and he reveled in the feel of Roman’s heavy pants brushing against him as Roman’s need grew and grew. His thrusts became heavier and deeper with each pass and at some point Roman released his legs so he could wrap his arms around Hunter and hold him as he pounded into him. Hunter took advantage of the change in position and locked his legs around Roman’s lower back, his heels digging into Roman’s ass with each lunge. He snagged his arms around Roman’s shoulders and held on as tight as he could as Roman’s heavy balls slapped against his ass. He sought out Roman’s mouth and was rewarded with deep, hungry kisses that turned him on almost as much as the friction that Roman’s cock was causing deep inside of him.

“I love you so much,” Roman whispered against his mouth.

“I love you,” Hunter returned as he released his hold on Roman’s shoulders so he could cup his face in his hands. “So much, Roman.”

Roman dipped down to sip at his lips a few more times as his lower body relentlessly pounded into Hunter’s but then his mouth hung just over Hunter’s as he ground out Hunter’s name. The feel of Roman’s cock pulsing inside of him set off Hunter’s own release and he closed his eyes as the orgasm ripped through him. He clamped down on Roman with every part of his body that he could and held on as wave after wave of pleasure rolled through him. Roman’s orgasm was just as strong if not more so because his body kept humping into Hunter uncontrollably as Roman’s fingers bit into his skin hard enough to leave bruises. When the haze of pleasure finally settled like a blanket over them, Roman’s body pressed Hunter’s farther into the mattress. Hunter wasn’t sure whose lips found whose first but he didn’t care because all he felt were Roman’s unspoken words with every tender caress.

Chapter Ten

Roman was sure he’d never seen anything more beautiful than Hunter on his knees, his beautiful pink lips loving Roman’s aching cock as water sluiced down his shoulders and along the curve of his back. And he definitely knew that he’d never felt as cherished as he did when Hunter touched him. Of course, all Hunter had to do was look at him in the way that he always did for Roman to know he’d finally come home. He wasn’t invisible anymore.

As the pressure on his dick intensified, Roman leaned his head back against the tile wall and closed his eyes. Sensation after sensation bombarded him as Hunter’s lush mouth sucked him all the way down. But when Hunter’s fingers dipped between his ass cheeks to play with his hole, Roman gave up the pretense of being able to hold out and he reached down to pull Hunter to his feet. Their mouths fed off each other as Roman searched out the condom and lube that Hunter had openly grabbed from the nightstand before taking Roman’s hand and leading him to the shower. He knew Hunter was likely still sore from their passionate encounter the night before so he was all prepared to be on the receiving end this time around, but Hunter took that choice away from him when he reached for the condom and began rolling it down Roman’s cock. His movements were slow and drawn out and only served to make Roman more insane with need. As soon as the condom was in place, Roman turned them around so it was Hunter’s back pressed to the wall.

Roman reached for the lube but Hunter took the bottle from him, his mossy eyes never leaving Roman’s as he put a dollop on his fingers and then reached behind himself. Although Roman couldn’t actually see Hunter’s fingers at work, he could see the way Hunter’s eyes darkened just a little bit and his lips opened on a soft exhale.

“Tell me how it feels,” Roman bit out as he slapped his hands on the wall on either side of Hunter’s head.

“So tight,” Hunter moaned and from the way his hips began to twist, Roman knew he was trying to work his fingers in deeper than they could go. “Hot,” Hunter added.

Roman swooped in to kiss him and then reached his hand down to Hunter’s crease. He followed the path of Hunter’s hand and then began probing Hunter’s already stuffed full hole. “Keep them there,” Roman ordered as he began pressing his finger in next to Hunter’s. Hunter gasped at the added pressure and then let out a whimper when Roman’s finger pressed down on both of his and then maneuvered them until he hit his own prostate. Since he knew the angle would be uncomfortable for Hunter to maintain, Roman only held them there for a few moments before pulling his and Hunter’s fingers free.

“Put your arms around my neck,” Roman said softly and as soon as Hunter had done it, Roman reached down and lifted Hunter up and pinned him against the wall and held him in place as he reached between them to position his cock. Hunter’s legs immediately wrapped around him and the position helped Roman search out Hunter’s hole. Hunter moaned when Roman slid into him but unlike the night before, Roman surged into Hunter in one long lunge.

“Fuck, Roman, so good,” Hunter cried out as his lips searched out Roman’s. “Fuck me really hard, okay?” Hunter whispered against his lips.

Since that had been Roman’s plan from the get go, he quickly pulled almost all the way out of Hunter and then slammed back in. Hunter let out a loud curse when Roman did it again but since he began pushing his hips down every time Roman plunged into him, Roman knew he wasn’t feel any pain or discomfort. After that, Roman set a ruthless pattern of pounding into Hunter until he was close to the edge and then pulling out until just the head of his dick was holding Hunter open and hanging there until Hunter begged and pleaded with him for more. Then he’d start all over again. He kept up the torment until his own body couldn’t take it anymore and then he brutally fucked Hunter until both of them were one body whose only goal was relief. When it came, Hunter actually bit down on his shoulder and the sting of pain had Roman shouting Hunter’s name as he unloaded into the condom. Hunter kept slamming his hips down on Roman as his hot release bathed both their bodies just before the hot water washed the evidence of their joining away.

***

Hunter was grateful for the water raining down on him and Roman because it made the tears easier to hide. He could still feel Roman’s pulsing cock deep inside of him and automatically tightened his muscles so that he could feel even more of the mind blowing sensation. Roman groaned at the move and actually shoved into him a little more.

The idea of playing in the shower together hadn’t actually hit Hunter until Roman had mentioned needing to wash the sweat from their day away as Hunter had started kissing him as soon as they got back to Roman’s place. They’d spent the entire day exploring Big Sur and had spent hours hiking to different spots to admire the view and check out the various attractions. And unlike the day before, Hunter hadn’t felt even an ounce of concern about being seen in public with Roman. They’d held hands, kissed, laughed, taken selfies…they’d even asked a couple they’d met on one of the trails to take a picture of them together. If anyone had looked at them strangely or with disgust, Hunter hadn’t noticed and he certainly wouldn’t have cared because nothing could chase away the feeling of how perfect his life was. Roman’s gentle introduction to what it was really supposed to feel like to have another man buried deep inside of his body had blown every one of Hunter’s expectations out of the water. When he’d fucked Roman, he’d reveled in watching Roman come apart beneath him but being fucked by Roman was so much different. It had been exactly like Roman had said…it had been about Roman taking care of him, cherishing his vulnerability that opening himself up to Roman required rather than exploiting it. And if he thought it would be a one-time feeling that came from it being his first time, he’d been wrong because even now with Roman still joined with him, all those emotions were wreaking havoc in his crowded mind. Hence the tears.

Hunter couldn’t help the twinge of loss he felt when Roman finally pulled free of his body so he could dispose of the condom. But Roman quickly made up for it by kissing him as he pulled their sated bodies together and stood under the soothing water. It could have been minutes or hours that passed before Roman turned off the shower and pulled him out onto the bathmat and began drying him off with a soft towel.

“Go get dressed,” Roman murmured against his lips as he wrapped the towel around Hunter’s hips. “We have reservations.”

Hunter nodded and then took one last look at Roman’s tight ass as he left the bathroom. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask Roman if they could just order room service when he heard Roman’s phone ringing where it sat on the nightstand. He glanced at it and called out to Roman, “Roman, it’s Gray.”

“Can you get it?” Roman called back.

Hunter picked up the phone and answered. “Gray, hi, this is Hunter.”

“Hey, Hunter,” Gray said, his voice quiet and uneven. A twinge of concern went through Hunter at how off Gray sounded and he automatically began walking towards the bathroom. “Can I talk to Roman?” Gray asked.

“Yeah, here he is,” Hunter said as he handed the phone to Roman.

Roman must have seen something in his eyes because he shot him a questioning look as he answered the phone. After that, Roman didn’t speak or even move as he listened to Gray. Finally, he said, “Yeah, okay,” and then hung up the phone.

“What?” Hunter asked. “What is it?”

Roman put the phone down on the counter and continued drying himself off, his movements automatic and efficient.

“Um, Walt – my father – is in the hospital.”

“What happened?” Hunter asked gently as he took the towel from Roman and took over the job of drying him off.

“His heart…Gray said they don’t think he has much time left. Hours maybe. Gray and Luke are on their way to the airport.”

“Roman, I’m sorry,” Hunter whispered as he wrapped his arms around Roman’s neck. Roman’s arms came around him.

“He’s asking for me.”

***

Roman clutched Hunter’s hand in his as they waited for their stop on the right floor. The elevator was crowded and had to make several stops as doctors and other hospital staff got on and off and he eventually lost track of what was going on around him as he mulled over the unexpected turn of events. It had been nearly four years since he’d seen his father and the idea of seeing him now in his final hours both scared the hell out of him and pissed him off.

“Baby, this is us,” Hunter said gently as he tugged at Roman’s hand. Roman let Hunter lead him off the elevator and down several hallways but with every step that drew them closer to his father’s room, Roman just wanted to turn around and go back to his place and crawl into his comfortable bed and wrap himself around Hunter. This was supposed to be their weekend. Every moment of it had been perfect up to this point but somehow fate had deemed that his past should step in like it always did and fuck everything up. He was on the verge of telling Hunter that they were going back to the hotel when he looked up and saw a familiar face staring at him with naked contempt.

Victoria looked exactly as she always did. Perfect. Whatever plastic surgeon she had on retainer made her sixty-three years look like forty-five and her slim figure was perfectly packaged in a silky pants suit that matched her stiletto pumps. Her dark blonde hair was done up in some kind of twist and nearly every piece of exposed skin had some kind of glittering jewelry adorning it. When her frosty eyes lit on Roman, her lips drew into a sneer and she turned her bitter eyes on the young nurse behind the nurse’s station. “I specifically told you not to call him,” she snapped and Roman couldn’t help but wonder how the nurse was supposed to know what she was talking about since she wouldn’t have a clue who Roman was.

“Mrs. Hawthorne-”

“What are you doing here?” Victoria snarled as she stepped in their path.

“Mrs. Hawthorne, I’m Hunter, Roman’s-”

“I know who you are,” Victoria bit out as she glared at Roman. “You’re one of his little playthings,” she said as she glanced briefly at Hunter. Her eyes went back to Roman. “You and your perversions,” she said with a shake of her head.

Her open hatred actually helped Roman snap out of his funk and he tightened his hold on Hunter’s hand as he moved in front of him and pushed past Victoria without a word. She let out an outraged gasp and he could hear her venting her anger on the poor nurse as he walked into the room just behind the nurse’s station.

He’d expected to see his father hooked up to all sorts of machines but there was surprisingly very little going on around him. There were just the basics – machines tracking his vitals and an IV. It wasn’t a good sign.

Walt Hawthorne had never been a big man but seeing him lying in the hospital bed, his pale, wrinkled skin drawn tight over his bones made him seem small and old. Which made sense since Walt was in his early seventies but since it had been so long since Roman had seen him, he only had the image of a fit, well-groomed man who spent most of his days on the golf course to go off of. A twinge of pity twisted in Roman’s gut but he ignored it.

His father’s eyes were open and staring at some point on the window so Roman slowly walked around the bed until his father noticed him. It seemed to take him several seconds to recognize Roman. The sound of his name being whispered and the small smile that spread across his father’s gaunt face had Roman tightening his hand around Hunter’s. He felt Hunter’s other hand come to rest on his back between his shoulders but there was no pressure for him to move forward.

“Roman,” his father said again and then he lifted his hand just a little bit. Bile spread in Roman’s mouth at the gesture and while he moved closer to the bed, he didn’t reach for his father’s hand and he didn’t sit in the chair next to the bed.

“Gray’s on his way,” Roman said quietly. “He said you wanted to see me.”

His father’s eyes shifted to Hunter but Roman didn’t introduce them. No way he wanted Hunter linked to this man in any way.

“I should have done more, Roman,” his father said feebly. “I promised her…” Roman stiffened but didn’t say anything because he knew exactly who his father was talking about. “She was everything to me.”

“If that were true, old man, she wouldn’t be six feet under.”

His father’s eyes closed and Roman felt absolutely nothing when a single tear escaped.

“I couldn’t…I would have lost everything. It was all Victoria’s.”

Roman’s rage went to a whole new level at that. “Money? You let her die so you wouldn’t lose your bank account?”

“Victoria’s father would have ruined me if I left her. But after my sweet Libby…afterwards I told Victoria I needed to bring you home.”

“And she just agreed to that?” Roman said sarcastically.

“I…I threatened to expose our marriage for what it was. I told her I would claim you as my son.”

Roman felt like he was going to be sick. “So she agreed to let me stay with you.”

His father nodded weakly. “As long as I agreed not to tell anyone who you were.”

“And to treat me like shit, right?” Roman snapped.

Another tear slipped down his father’s face as he shook his head. “There was no other way…”

“There were a hundred other ways, Walt,” Roman sneered. “Hell, I would have had a better chance at a fucking childhood if you’d let them put me in foster care.”