Read Finding Me Online

Authors: Dawn Brazil

Finding Me (16 page)

I rolled my eyes at his ridiculous attitude.
How dare he be mad at me?
“Um…”
Swallow
“I don’t know why you’re so upset. You don’t have a reason to be mad at me. I had every right to do what I did last night.” Whew, there it was. I said it and I meant it, too.

He looked up with sadness in his eyes. I backed up a fraction. The sorrow in his eyes touched me – almost overtook me. “I love you. The least you could do is lie.” He shook his head as if unable to comprehend my words. He took another deep breath, then put his head back down.

I ignored the love part of his speech. I had to or I’d succumb to it. To him. “Lie about what, Chris? For what?” I shook my head and placed my hands on my hips, waiting for him to explain.
Was he crazy?
Had he gone mad?

He raised his head and stared at me with hard eyes. “Who was it?”

“Who was what?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about. Don’t play games with me.”

I swallowed more nervous saliva. Crazy people can be violent, dangerous. Right now, he was the crazy person. I backed up more, just in case. I glanced down the hall. No one paid any attention to us. I turned my attention back to him. If his eyes were fire I’d be scorched. He bore them into me with an intensity I’d never seen.

“Was it him?” He pointed behind me at someone. I spun around to see who he referred to. He pointed to a senior named Blake who happened to walk by.

Chris lifted his hand, made a circular motion with his index finger, and Blake tripped over himself. He fell, face forward with a thud to the hard wood floor below. Stumbling, he picked himself up and looked around nervously.

Chris wasn’t finished with the punishment for whatever offense he believed the guy to have made. He formed a circle in the air again with his right hand and Blake went face first into the locker beside him. The poor guy cried out in pain. This time he attracted the attention of two girls walking by. They didn’t stop to offer assistance. They looked at him as if he’d insulted them when he fell. They gave him a you’re-such-a-freak look, then kept moving. I twisted my hands over and over, wanting to go help him. But I was afraid to move.

I turned and glared at Chris. “Stop it. Now. What’s wrong with you? I barely even know him.” I glanced at the guy sympathetically. “What happened last night was no one’s fault but yours.”

Chris sighed loudly then ran his hands through his hair. “What did I do?” I looked at him startled. “Can you tell me what I did?” My mouth fell open. I couldn’t move or speak.

With the wave of his hands, a silence fell over the school: everyone and everything became frozen in place. I spun around, gawking at the scene.

Melissa and Emily were at their lockers, staring and pointing at us. Blake was leaning on a locker and rubbing his sore cheek. Mrs. Battle, the honors English teacher, had her hands thrust in the air, in surprise, because Jennifer Riley must have bumped into her and caused her papers to scatter. Jennifer stood in front of her with her hands clasped to her mouth and a shocked expression on her face.

“Please,” he said with a measure of caution in his words. “I want you to explain so I can understand.” With one quick motion, he reached for me. He pulled me so my back was against the locker in front of him. What I had been searching for last night was now present, the electric current that passed between us.
Why can I feel it now?
He glowered at me as if he were trying to get answers to some unknown question from my head.
This is all too much.

“I’m so confused. I really like you, but I don’t understand what’s going on. Your behavior last night. Your odd behavior now.” I crossed my arms in front of me defiantly, not willing to allow him to make me feel guilty.
That’s right, stand up for yourself.

“What I did last night.” His voice raised an octave and broke at the end. I shrieked and pushed against the locker, wishing I could crawl inside.

“I didn’t even see you last night. You were holed up with someone in your room. I tried to get to you, but you blocked me. I even had Sam try and she couldn’t get to you. But she heard you.” He looked me squarely in the eyes then and took a step forward. I swallowed hard, eyes bulging.

“We all heard you. Just one thought. You wanted whoever you were with to kiss you. So I’ll ask once more.” He pulled me by the loop of my jeans so that I was close to his side. I sucked in a shocked breath. He grabbed my right arm and held me firmly in place. So close his chocolate mint breath made my head spin. “Are you going to tell me who you were with? Or do I just start smashing more faces?”

I croaked out what was supposed to be a laugh. “Are you serious? Is this some kind of… initiation joke? I was with
you
last night.” I pried my arm from his grasp. Now I was officially freaked.

He stared at me for a long moment. He leaned forward, tilted his head to the side, and looked at me with a confused expression. I backed up until I felt the cool metal of the locker touch my arm again.

“Are you certain it was me?”

“I’m positive it was you.” It sounded like a question.
Does he think I’m an idiot
?

“So there was nothing different about me last night?” He spoke slowly as if he were talking to a preschool child. “Think about it before you answer,” he instructed.

I looked at the floor and not his eyes. Nervous butterflies attacked my abdomen and I twisted my hands together, unable to stop my nervous fidgeting. “Well, you were acting kinda strange. How you talked and you wore your pajamas. I thought that was odd. You talked different, I guess. It was a little weird. Uh…different.” I shrugged my shoulders. I’d keep my mouth shut about the rest because I didn’t need him to lose it.

“Dammit!” He slammed his fist into the locker next to my head. It made a terrible screech and the lock twisted, fell off, and hit the floor. It landed next to my foot. He took a deep breath and looked at me again. I cowered in the small space he allowed me to stand in.

“I’m so sorry. I should’ve never left you alone. I…” he appeared to search the open air for the correct words. “I promise. It wasn’t me in your room last night. I wasn’t even on Earth last night.”

 

Chapter 14

“So basically, what you’re saying is…I kissed a stranger…who happens to look exactly like you. It wasn’t you…he could’ve just been your twin.” He slouched forward and ran his left hand across his lips then through his hair. “Ah...I see. An evil twin. A doppelganger.” I was irritated with him and this whole situation. I sighed loudly.
What have I gotten myself into?
I was smarter than this. I should have known better.

“I know this sounds crazy. But I’ve never lied to you about anything. I’m not lying now. It wasn’t me or an evil twin of mine in your room last night.” I stared at him. He stared back. No one moved or said anything for a moment.

“Maybe…I’m just not who you think I am.” I ran my hand across my face and rubbed my throbbing temple. “This is a lot more than I counted on. Much more. I don’t think I’m cut out for this superhero nonsense.” My stomach flipped.
Don’t say that, Chloe. You want to be with him.
This is how you do it
.
So shut up!

“No, you are. You’re Amanda. And I promise you – you can do this. But I made a mistake. I didn’t tell you everything. There’s so much still to be told.” He bent closer to me as if someone might hear our conversation, but everyone remained frozen in place. I stared at him, waiting, curious.
What’s wrong now?

“The ENO,” he said, “is a shape shifter. Like Raja. I’ve never seen him that I know of. But he can take on anyone’s identity once he has seen them, within a reasonable amount of time. I know that’s who came to you last night.” He grabbed my hand and traced patterns on my knuckles. His hand was moist and soft. Not like last night. His brow creased and he appeared vexed over what he wanted to say next. I didn’t speak. I reeled from his shocking revelation.

“Chloe, I think it’s time we filled you in on some facts.” My face scrunched in confusion. “Not that what we’ve told you so far has been a lie. It hasn’t been. But it wasn’t, um…everything.”

Just then, a blistering wind whipped past me, tossing my hair over my left eye. My gaze followed the movement. When I turned my head, Sam greeted me with a smile. “We should talk.” But her smile wasn’t real. Only half her mouth turned up and her eyes were narrowed. My stomach knotted. She was supposed to be the happy one, too.
This must be bad.

“Um…okay.”

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you, Chloe. I’m Sam and I’m a Peacekeeper.” She extended her hand for me to shake. I peered down at it outstretched before me. Confused
. Can these kids get any freakin’ weirder?

I turned to stare at Chris, but he had his head down pushing buttons on a small silver gadget he held.

“I’m still the person you met a short time ago, but I have another role, too. I know this is going to be confusing. But hear me out.” I wasn’t about to say anything. I needed to understand, and if she could give answers, I wanted to hear them. “We are all Peacekeepers. Sent to protect humanity.”

“Protect humanity from the ENO?” I asked.

“No…from themselves.” She smiled. A real smile that stretched from one corner of her mouth to the other. “The normals can be cruel and violent without the help of a clinically psychotic being.”

“Right.” I nodded my agreement. “So what’s the story?”

“We protect. We’ve always protected the people – until the war. We don’t know who started it, why it was started, or how to end it. But we do know that once it ends, we all go back to how it used to be: with us keeping the peace.”

I could feel the frown stretch across my brows. I tried to suppress it. But I couldn’t. “Um, you don’t know a lot. I mean…is there someone else who can tell me more?” The last thing I wanted to do was upset her – she was so nice. But I needed answers. Real ones.

Sam’s head bowed and her lips quivered. I opened my mouth but quickly closed it. I inhaled a deep breath. Nice wasn’t what I needed – answers were.

“You have the answers,” Sam whispered. Her voice almost inaudible, I wasn’t certain I’d heard what I thought.

“You said…I have the answers?” I pointed a finger at myself to make sure she understood what I was saying.

She lifted her head to meet mine. She ran her tongue across her lips, then nodded.

“No,” I said, shaking my head. “I don’t know anything. That’s why you materialized. Right? To give me answers.”

“Chloe we didn’t want to freak you out. But the truth is…you have all the answers. Who started the war, why the war started in the first place, and how to end it. You also know a great deal about the ENO.”

I backed up into my locker. A mixture of fear, amusement, and confusion comingling. I turned to stare at Chris – he stared back. Then his chin dipped and he mumbled, “Sorry I didn’t tell you.” Anger bubbled inside me.
They tricked me
.

Chris exhaled heavily. “No, Chloe. We didn’t trick you into doing this–”

“You can hear my thoughts now?”
Just great.

“No. But I know that’s what you’re thinking. The truth is, it was my choice not to tell you everything – not everyone else. Especially Sam. She thought we should tell you everything up front, but after your first meeting with everyone, I didn’t think so. I didn’t think you’d be able to handle it. I was wrong.”

“Can you at least tell me what the ENO has to do with this? Why did he come to me as you?”

“We really don’t know who the ENO is. But we do know that he is not on our side,” Chris said.

“I had a memory, a vision – something…I’m still not sure what it was. In it, we’re talking and you tell me we’re being hunted,” said Sam. “You told me about a man who leads the hunt. You said he was smart, manipulative, and dangerous. He wants to destroy us and everyone else. You said he could get in your head. Make you believe things, do things that you wouldn’t normally do or say. Other than that, I don’t know anything about him. When we’re reborn, we know our purpose: to stop the destruction of the world at the hands of a lunatic. But we cannot clearly see our enemy. But you had a breakthrough on Tierra – discovered something about him, but we died before you could share it…um, and for some reason you blocked us from finding out about it when you did. The only reason we know that much is because I was able to pick up pieces from you and my visions.”

“So basically until I get my memory back – which is a big maybe not – we’re fighting blind. We don’t even know anything about our enemy. Because honestly the whole he-wants-to-kill-us thing kinda fell a part last night when we made out.”

Chris squared his jaw and clenched his fist.
Why did I say that?
I bit my bottom lip.

“Not that I liked it or anything. I’m just saying.”

“Chris, chill. It happened. Get over it,” Sam said, shaking her head. He slumped against the locker beside me. “And Chloe, the ENO is evil. Don’t get caught up in his mind games. He may come to you in the form of dreams or a vision or as another person, but no matter how kind he appears, it’s a lie. He’s not your friend and given the right circumstances we’re pretty sure he’d kill any of us. Next time, call us. We will all come and we will defeat him - together. But not one person – not just one of us. We must all do it together. I’m positive about that. So if he’s slow to kill you and you can’t call us…run. Just run like your life depends on it – because it does. I’ve had a number of visions about him also and one thing’s clear to me….he’s pure evil in them all.”

I massaged my forehead with my fingers. “This is all so confusing. Fighting an enemy we don’t know anything about…”

“We know. We’re sorry. Chris only wanted you to feel that you had a choice in all this. You know…not to rush you or anything. But honestly, if you don’t regain your memory – and soon – we’re all going to die. That’s the truth,” Sam said. Her bottom lip protruded and she cast her eyes down.

“Oh, Sam. I’m scared as hell.” I grabbed her hand and rubbed it. “But I see now I don’t have a choice. And I promise I’ll try my hardest to fix this.”

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