Finding You (11 page)

Removing her feet from his lap, he walked over to his desk and a minute later her email chime went off. 

She opened up his calendar.  “You have another meeting in twenty minutes, Sir.”

He smiled.  “I think I may hire you Nova, how about a desk right next to mine?”

Holy shit
.  Did the idea of it just turn her on? Hell yes it did.  “As appealing as that sounds, I don’t think you would get much work done and I’m not in the market to be an assistant.  I’m afraid I’m of no use without the MBA.”

“Oh sweet heart, that MBA has nothing to do with all the uses I have for you.”

And wasn’t that the absolute truth.

His phone rang.  “I’m sorry, I need to take this.”

She started cleaning up their lunch but she couldn’t help but pay attention this time as he yelled into the phone. 

“Damn it. I don’t understand why it is that you can’t seem to resolve this.  I hired you for a reason.   You have an hour to clean this up or we are pulling out.  Do I make myself clear?”

She knew it best to just stay out of it but as she tried to mind her own business she couldn’t help but feel a little bad for him.  He looked completely stressed and she was curious. “Is everything alright?”

“I have an iron clad IT crew but we are having an issue they can’t seem to resolve.”

Her heart raced. 
Oh, please, please tell me
. “What kind of issue?”

He looked at her a little skeptically.  “Do you really want to know this?”

She shook her head trying not to start bouncing on her feet.  She loved a challenge. 

“We have an internet security issue.  My head IT man has been working since yesterday with our internet security company and they still haven’t figured out what is wrong.”

“Who do you use?”

“Guardian Global Securities.”

She laughed. 
Oops!

“Why is that funny to you Nova?”

She could play with Guardian Global as easy as she could play with her hair.  Stanford used Guardian Global and she knew their weakness.  It had taken her a few weeks to find a way around their fire walls but when she did, she had complete access to Stanford’s computers and they had no idea she was there.  Funny thing was, Guardian Global was supposed to be the best.

“Answer the question Nova!”

She grabbed her backpack thankful she had her old faithful lap top with her.  To be honest, she had been afraid to leave it behind.  She had been watching everything Stanford was doing. 

Sitting down behind his desk, she opened her lap top.  After a quick search on the internet she pulled up his corporate website.  She twisted her hair up then turned to face him.  She couldn’t believe she was doing this. 

“Ian, give me your word that you will never disclose what I am about to do with anyone.”

Reluctantly, he nodded. 

“Give me your word Ian.  If you tell anyone about this, I could spend a lot of time in jail.”

She may not know much about him, but he was honest.  She knew that.  He mulled it over for a few minutes.  “You have my word.”

She wiggled his mouse.  “Give me your password.”

He starred at her.

“I hate to tell you this baby but I can get in with or without you giving it to me.  It will just take me longer if you don’t cooperate.

He rambled off his password. 

“You are paying a lot of money to a company who has a major flaw in one of their firewalls.”

Pulling up a chair he sat down next to her. “And you know this how Nova.”

She looked up at him and cracked her knuckles.  “You’re not the only one with skills baby.”

After spending about ten minutes delving into his hard drive she shut everything down and started to reboot his system.  “I can’t correct the problem.  It’s on their end.  They have a code error in one of their firewalls.  It needs rewritten. I did however throw your IT guy a bone.  There is a basic patch you can use.  I only installed it on your computer though.  I assume you don’t store your information on a main frame do you? I mean aside of things you don’t mind others having access too.”

“No, I don’t.”             

Turning off her lap top, she stowed it in her backpack.  Showing it to Ian probably hadn’t been very smart.  She’d just have to make sure she hid it were he would never find it. 

“Any file you have on your computer is safe. Or at least as safe as it can be unless someone decides they want a challenge.  If anyone tries to gain access to your computer you will know it.

“You should really consider changing companies.  I can recommend a few for you to look at.  Guardian Global isn’t going to get it fixed because it’s been that way for over a year.  Meaning they don’t know there is a problem and I highly doubt they are going to devote the work time to have someone try to find what’s wrong.  Their company is built on reputation not work product.  Oh, and you aren’t at liberty to tell them what’s wrong.”

She knew from the look on his face she had just blew his mind. “Nova, how did you know that?”

She turned around and smiled.  “Books.  I have read a lot of them.”

He shook his head.  “How did you know they had a flaw in their program?”

“Stanford uses the same company.  I watch his computer to keep an eye on him.”  She couldn’t believe she confessed to him. 
Had she just made a mistake
?  “Are you going to turn me in?  The FBI likes to make an example of hackers?”

Standing up so quickly is chair rammed into his credenza.  “Holy Fuck! How the hell did you become a hacker Nova?”

Well, at least he wasn’t threatening to call the police.  “I told you, I read books.”

“You read a book to learn code and how to be a computer hacker?  Are you fucking serious?”

“Yes, and I took a few computer programming classes.”

His eyes were still big as saucers.

“Oh, by the way.”

He ran his fingers through his hair.  Something she noticed he did when he was nervous. 

“Do I really want to know?”

“Don’t fire your IT guy.  As a matter of fact give him a raise.  He earned it for figuring out there was a problem to begin with.  I don’t even know the guy but trust me, he is good.  You’d be stupid to let him go.”

“And what am I supposed to say when I change companies and then give him a raise?”

“Well, first of all, maybe you shouldn’t have been so mean to him.”

He raised an eyebrow.  “He is paid to do a job Nova and he wasn’t doing it.  If he had done it well, he would have also known what the problem was.  He didn’t.  You however did and you sure as fuck didn’t go to M.I.T.”

Only because I turned them down but I’d just keep that to myself. 
She could go on and on with him about this but she wouldn’t.  “Trust me, you do not want to let him go.” 

At 5:30 her text chime went off.

Ian:
I will be late.

She had no idea how long and since he hadn’t specified she felt it wasn’t her place to ask.  She checked his calendar but nothing was scheduled after 5 P.M. 

Unsure of what to do she went to the kitchen.  Roberta had prepared Stromboli sandwiches with Greek salads. 
Yum
!

“Ms. Drake, he instructed me to leave his dinner in the refrigerator.”

Sadly, she felt a little disappointed. “Did he say how long he would be?”

“No Miss, he didn’t.”

Nova scrubbed her foot against the kitchen floor.  She picked up her phone to see if he had sent her any more information but there was nothing.

“Ms. Drake, he only asks me to put his food in the refrigerator if he is going to be considerably late.”

She looked up to her thankful for something that was useful.

“Would you like your dinner now?”

She really didn’t want to eat alone but it seemed she didn’t have much of a choice.  “Yes, I will take it to the T.V. room.”

She walked in and turned on the television.  The Rangers were playing the Nationals.  Aside of SEC football her next love was Baseball. 

She made the best of it.  The Rangers won, she was happy but at seven she was still alone.  She cleaned up her dishes and took them back to the kitchen. 

She hated to admit it but she missed Ian.  It was strange being in the house without him.  Despite the incredible sex she was actually starting to like him.  She had never had anyone around just too talk to. It was actually kind of nice.

Finally after sitting at the bottom of the stairs wishing his head lights would appear she remembered the books in her car.  She checked her phone again, nothing so she went outside and got them out of the back seat.  She didn’t want him to know she had purchased them so she took off to the library and nestled into one of the oversized chairs. 

She pulled her phone out of her pocket, plugged in the ear buds and turned on her music.  Finally she felt like she was in her element. All alone with her music and a book, why would she need anything else?

Page by page she read on being the perfect submissive.  It was like a ‘How to’ manual. Very educational, not to mention it had an entire chapter devoted to safety.  This chapter reiterated the importance of never entering into a relationship without a safe word.  It also discussed the importance of negotiating limits beforehand.  She thought about her limits.  She also thought about her safe word.

The next book frightened her.  Pages of things she had never imagined.  Humiliation, slavery, KNIVES.  Trying not to make herself panic she closed it and went back to the first book.  

She thought of Ian.  She liked what he did to her but it concerned her on what she would do if his desires were in fact that dark.  She had obviously been ill prepared in setting her limits.  She would have to renegotiate. 

Eventually, the book and her music sent her off to sleep.

~  ~

He looked around the house for her before finally finding her in the library.  She was like a ghost in the house.  Rarely seen unless summoned and never heard.  He opened the door to the library and found her sleeping.  On her chest lay a book that she had covered with both her hands.  The white cords of her ear buds peaked out from under her hair.  Her phone sat next to her.  Her obedience pleased him. 

He sat down at the desk across from her.  He had no motives; he just wanted to watch her.  He marveled at the angel sleeping peacefully in his chair.  He couldn’t get over how much he was starting to enjoy having her around.  He didn’t intend for these feelings to emerge and he sure as fuck didn’t know what to do about them but she had him captivated.  It is why he was late.  He wanted to prove to himself that she only had one place in his life and that was to be at his sexual disposal.  It hadn’t worked.  The entire time he had been at the office he had done nothing but think about her.

He was still blown away from what she had done in his office.  Not just the sex, I mean that was off the charts hot but also the fact that she was a hacker.  He knew she was brilliant.  He had checked into her and she was top of her class with the highest GPA but that surpassed everything, even more so because she taught herself how to do it.

That thought made him a little sad.  Despite how beautiful and brilliant she was, she had no friends, no family who gave a shit about her and up until a few days ago, not even a cell phone. 

She had no idea how much they were alike.  She was a quiet creature who stayed to herself and he was very much the same way.  His demons had made him hard.  He also knew she was studying him like a test subject trying to figure him out.  Any other time that would bother him but for some reason, with her it didn’t.

He picked up his phone and tapped his message app. 

Ian:
Do you know what I do to little girls who study on my time?

The whistle in her ear roused her.  The second time it woke her.  He watched her as she sat up reaching for her phone.

She was sleepy and clumsy as she tried to get her beautiful green eyes to focus.  It pleased him even more that the sound of the whistle, the sound of his call could wake her so easily from her sleep.  This deep connection was what he had longed for even though it did scare the hell out of him. 

Her eyes lit up when she read the message.  She scrambled to her feet closing the book lying across her chest and picked up the two books laying in the floor that he hadn’t noticed.  When she stood she saw him starring at her.  One by one she pulled the ear buds from her ears and turned off the music. 

“What do you have there?” he asked getting up and walking to her.

She slid her phone in her pocket and quickly shifted the books behind her back.

“Cat got your tongue, sweetheart?”

Did she really think he wouldn’t make her show him?  He watched her eye the open door to the library.  No way.  She wouldn’t run.  She had to know what he would do to her if she did.

She looked back at him and then she took off.

Well. Fuck. Me.

“Nova,” he yelled as she turned a hard right out the door to the library.  Her room was four doors down.

He sprinted behind her. 

Her door was closing just as he managed to put his foot in the door to stop her from closing it on him.  He pushed it open and came in behind her.  “Show me what you have Nova.  NOW!!!”

She shook her head.

“Are you directly disobeying me?”

She shook her head in agreement. 

“Don’t move Nova.  Not one inch.”  He walked over to her.  The books still hid behind her back.  “Give them to me.”  He had no idea what she had that she would go to such extreme measures to protect.  “Please Ian, I’m sorry.  Please don’t make me do this.”

“Now Nova!  Your ass is already going to be blistering red for running from me.  You really don’t want to piss me off.”

She hesitated then finally handed them over.

He looked twice at the first book.  Then he looked at the other two.  At first he thought she was probably reading how to successfully hack the FBI or something deviant after her manipulation of a global internet security company so the fact that she had D/s books should make him feel better.  But it didn’t. 

He looked at her.  Her face completely flushed with embarrassment.  “When did you buy these?”

“Today,” she answered.  “I went shopping after I got out of class.”

“Why did you buy these?”

She took a deep breath.  “I’m out of my element.  I don’t know what to do and this is how I learn.”

She kept her face to the ground.  She didn’t want to look at him and he knew that.  “Get rid of the books.  Don’t bring anything else like this into this house.  Do you understand?”

She walked to him and retrieved her books.  “I’m sorry…Sir.
I will get rid of them tomorrow.” 

She sat down on the edge of her bed.  He wanted nothing more than to spank her ass and he was still considering it until a loud clap of thunder rattled the house.  He watched as her shoulders rolled down and she started to shake. She was afraid of storms. 

“Go to bed Nova.  We will talk in the morning.”  He closed her door and headed down the hallway.  He had watched the weather on his way home.  The storm would blow over soon but perhaps the loud thunder would work to his advantage.  If she was afraid of storms this would be her punishment.

He locked the house and turned on the alarm and went to his room.  She was advancing at a faster rate and he would have to accommodate her intellect.  She was exceptionally smart and he had underestimated her thirst for knowledge.  He thought of what she said to him as he pulled off his clothes.  “This is how I learn.”

Had she only ever received the wrong kind of attention?  She had a mother.  He remembered her telling him that she died when she was sixteen.  Wasn’t there anyone to guide her or had she learned everything from books?

The thunder clapped a vicious boom and the lights went out.  He panicked when he heard her scream.  Running out of his bedroom he took the stairs two at a time.  He heard her as soon as his feet touched the marble floor at the bottom of the stairs.  Trying to find her in the dark wasn’t easy until he heard her whispering something he couldn’t understand.

In between the flashes of lightening he finally saw her, huddled in the corner by the front door.  Her head was down, her hands over her ears.  She was frantic. 

“Please no, please no, please no,” she kept saying over and over as he ran to her side.  He was almost afraid to touch her.  He honestly didn’t think she even knew he was there.

“Nova?”

She kept saying the same words over and over.  “Nova, talk to me baby.”

Again nothing.  Sitting down he did the only thing he knew to do, he pulled her into his lap.  She continued to rock back and forth.  Removing her hands from her ears he pulled her tight against him.  “Baby, please stop.  You are seriously freaking me out.”

Finally she lifted her head and looked at him as she grabbed him around his neck and held on with a death grip. 

“Please Ian, please don’t leave me.  I’m afraid.”

He could feel her rapid breathing against his chest.  “Nova, its only thunder.”

“Please Ian, please don’t leave me by myself.  I...I...can’t.”

He picked her up and carried her to his room   Laying her down on his bed, he pulled her close to him and pulled the covers over them.  “It’s alright baby, I’ve got you
.
I’m not going anywhere
.
”

Her body continued to shake as he tried to settle her, to make her feel safe but each clap of thunder frightened her more.  He had to make the thunder go away. 

Picking up his phone from his night stand he scrolled through his songs, turned up the volume and pushed the ear buds in each of her ears. 

When the thunder roared again she didn’t flinch.  She couldn’t hear it, the music worked. 

When the storm finally passed and the thunder had ceased, he carefully pulled the ear buds from her ears.  “Are you alright, baby?” he asked kissing her forehead.

He was expecting her to still be scared, what he wasn’t expecting was her to fly out of the bed in a full blown panic.

“I’m so sorry… I panicked.”

She looked like she had just been caught committing a crime. Getting out of the bed slowly he tried to get closer to her as she kept inching towards his bedroom door.  She was going to run again.

“Talk to me Nova.  Why does the thunder scare you?”

She shook her head.  She was very much with him but her head was somewhere else again. Someplace that scared her. 

“Don’t,” he said grabbing her hand as she started to run. 

He watched as her face fell.  She was ashamed.  “I’m messed up. Just leave it at that.”

The one thing he had been trying so hard not to admit was now clearly waving a flag in front of his face.  On some bizarre level her damage was what connected them. She just didn’t know it.

He tried to pull her back into his arms but her posture stiffened.  “This is a business deal Ian.  Nothing more and I know that.  I shouldn’t have come in here.  I’m sorry.” 

Stepping away from him, she turned and walked out. 

She was right, this was a business deal. He hadn’t signed up for this.  Turning around he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror.  He almost didn’t recognize the man staring back at him.  What the hell was he doing? He wasn’t the comforting type.  He was emotionless, unattached and he had just broken every rule he lived by.  Don’t let anyone get close.

Running his hands through his hair he let out a frustrated growl.  He mentally kicked himself.   He bought her to fulfill a need.  He knew there was a risk bringing her into his home but he couldn’t navigate her into submission at X, that’s why he had offered her the deal.  Not to get to know her.  She had a purpose in his house and that didn’t include any type of emotional connection.