‘Center pages,’ she spat out, as if it hurt to speak.
A pulse began to beat in his throat. The glaring headline caught his eye moments before he recognized the Brazilian dancer posing provocatively across the pages. The color drained from Ruben’s face. ‘Baby, I can explain.’
ignored him as she stared wordlessly at the newspaper he now held. Ruben couldn’t believe he’d gone through all those nights of guilt about keeping such a huge secret from her just to be found out when it was all over. Of course, the child wasn’t his. Not that he’d thought it was for one second.
It looked like the mother had taken out a little insurance by selling her story. His lawyers had tried to get her to sign a confidentiality agreement, but she’d refused. Any hope that her own shame at trying to pin another man’s baby on him would be sufficient to ensure nobody ever found out was stupid. He guessed the world didn’t work like that anymore.
She could tell a good story, he’d give her that. By the time he finished reading, he almost believed the dancer’s tale of the worldly pop star that had seduced and dumped a naïve twenty year old who, until recently, believed he was the father of her child. Ruben pitied her baby and hoped that eliminating him as a potential father would at least narrow down the search for the real one.
‘You know,’
‘But I knew I couldn’t be the father, Beth. Don’t you see?’ He tried to lift her face so she would at least look at him, but she shrugged him off. ‘What was the point of worrying you over something I knew couldn’t be true?’
‘Oh, give me a break, Ruben. You were never going to tell me. You took the tests over a week ago, what has stopped you telling me since then?’
He scrambled for an answer. ‘I got scared, Beth. I thought once this had all blown over, it would be easier to tell you…but then the enormity of what I had done began to hit me, and I couldn’t think of a way to make it right.’
’s cynical smile chilled him. ‘I am still not a part of your life, am I?’ Her sudden change of tack caught him off guard. He opened his mouth to contradict her, but she cut him off. ‘It’s still your decision what happens between us. You decided that I didn’t need to know the man I am in love with might have fathered a child, so you simply didn’t tell me.’
‘I knew it wasn’t mine,’ he insisted.
‘How did you know?’
‘Because I always use a condom—you know that, Beth.’
slammed down the glass she was holding in her hand. ‘Like the night of the party you mean?’
‘That was different, we were both out of control that night,’ he said, realizing for the first time she was right. He’d never even thought about it. His only concern had been repairing the damage he’d done to their relationship. ‘Are you ok? I mean, is there a chance you could be pregnant?’ he asked. Cold eyes stared back at him.
‘Why on earth would I tell you, Ruben? I mean, it’s not like we are close enough to confide in each other about stuff like that…is it?’ He guessed he deserved the comment, but it still stung. He asked her why she couldn’t understand he’d done it to protect her.
’s temper snapped. ‘How dare you pretend you did this for me? You and I both know you kept quiet to save your own ass. I was the last thing on your mind.’
‘Beth, I was terrified.’ He turned her to look at him. ‘You know how bad I felt over that fight we had. I was scared I had lost you.’ His voice cracked then as he saw he wasn’t getting through to her.
‘That’s just the problem. I told you over and over that I was fine and that nothing had changed, but you thought you knew better. You don’t respect my opinion or allow me to decide how I feel about things that affect us both.’ She pushed him away, taking a step back as she crossed her arms.
‘I know I was wrong, but I didn’t want this to come between us.’ Ruben sank onto the bed, sudden tiredness draining his energy. She sat down beside him leaving a gap between them. He ached to close it, but knew he would be rejected.
‘You keep things from me all the time,’ she said, raising a hand to stop his protest of innocence. ‘Why didn’t you tell me that somebody had been in your apartment in
Ruben flushed. ‘Our apartment,’ he corrected, playing for time as he tried to figure out how she knew. ‘There was no need. It was a one off. Probably one of the staff or security.’
‘So you decided there was just no need to tell me that I could be in danger or to watch out for some obsessed fan?’
‘Byron,’ he said angrily, as he realized he must have been the one who told her. Trust him to create a drama out of nothing. He’d been pretty lucky as far as psycho fans went until someone had broken into his condo and had sex in his bed. Ruben shuddered at the memory, remembering his disgust when he had found the used condom lying on his sheets. There had been no signs of forced entry and the police hadn’t managed to find anything suspicious on the tape from the surveillance camera in the lobby of his building. Personally, he thought it could be someone from the security firm employed by the building’s management company, but had no proof. Still, he’d insisted they be replaced.
got her feet. ‘Don’t blame him; he let it slip when I found him cleaning our bedroom mirror in
He didn’t know what to say. Crazy fans were part of his everyday life. Being cautious was usually enough to keep them at a safe distance. She had never been in any danger, so why worry her?
Long minutes passed before she spoke again. ‘This was the worst thing you could have done, don’t you see that?’ Her expression was earnest as she turned to face him. ‘You know it took me a long time to get over my last relationship, Ruben.’
He leapt to his feet. ‘Here we go again,’ he shouted. ‘I wondered how long it would be before you brought that jerk into the conversation.’ Despite the precarious position he was in, Ruben couldn’t keep quiet if she was about to compare him to her ex again.
The calmness of her tone surprised him. ‘The point I am making is that Simon also tried to control how I felt about our relationship by keeping things from me. The result of which was that I spent three years without ever really knowing the person I thought I was in love with.’
‘That’s crazy, Beth. In no way is this situation anything like that. I am not cheating on you or abusing you.’ She shook her head, rejecting his words. ‘Okay, I made a huge mistake by not telling you about the paternity test, but if you really think about it, you will see it doesn’t have to affect us—’
‘Of course it will affect us, Ruben. How can I ever get to really know or trust you if I don’t have all the facts? For all I know, the man I am in love with doesn’t even exist.’
Ruben reached out, desperate to hold her, to make things right. ‘Baby, calm down.’
‘Stop telling me how to feel,’ she shouted, scrambling to her feet and heading for the door.
‘Don’t leave now,’ he pleaded. ‘We need to talk about this.’
The face she turned to him was streaked with tears. ‘I can’t talk now, Ruben…I need time to think.’ She stepped back before he could embrace her, pulling on a coat. ‘I’ll be back soon, okay?’ She slipped out of the door quickly, allowing him no time to protest.
Later, he wished he made her stay with him. He hadn’t known then she would not be coming back.
The afternoon had passed slowly and he’d waited as long as he could before leaving for the arena. Nobody he’d spoken to had seen or heard from her all evening and after trying her cell phone numerous times, he’d begun to worry. Resolving that he would call the police if she wasn’t at the hotel when he returned, he’d cut his performance as short as he dared before racing back.
As if guided to it, his eyes had landed on the folded sheet of paper on his pillow as soon as he entered the bedroom. Not needing to read it to know what it said, he opened it with shaky hands.
She was gone.
got out of the cab slowly, her legs shaking. She’d been dreading this meeting. The idea of visiting the prestigious hotel on Sunset Boulevard would have excited her in the old days, but she felt too jaded at that moment to appreciate anything. The lobby, with its diaphanous curtains and glowing glass walls, did take her breath away momentarily.
The receptionist gave her directions to the Banquet and Conference room and she walked briskly to the elevator, feeling out of place in such opulent surroundings. She’d stayed in finer hotels than this one during her time with Ruben, so she didn’t know why she felt so self-conscious. She knew the ecru linen shirtdress she wore looked smart enough. Letting out a breath as the doors closed in front of her, she put her sense of unease down to stress. She knew the next few hours were going to be hard on her.
Karen, the charity’s director, greeted her warmly. ‘
took a fortifying sip from her cup before answering. ‘I’ve been fine…busy.’
‘Can I change your mind about resigning?’ Karen’s directness startled her.
‘I’m just teasing,’ she smiled. ‘I know you must have your reasons.’ Karen’s gray hair and motherly appearance hid a razor sharp mind and her perceptive eyes seemed to be seeing right through
How much did she know?
had hardly spoken to any of the staff for the six weeks that had passed since she left Ruben in
But she’d discovered something during the last few weeks that made any notion of staying unthinkable, hence her decision to leave. The meeting with the board she was about to attend had been called to tie up loose ends and give her the chance to meet the person who would be taking over her job.
‘Shall we go in?’ Karen said, gesturing that
People began to settle in their seats at the long teak table, leaving the one at the top ominously empty. Her heart dropped into her boots.
Everyone was here…who was it for?
She was left no time to panic as Karen introduced her to the young man opposite who was to be her successor. His name was Mark and he looked to be green out of med school and absolutely terrified. Sympathy overwhelmed her, forcing her own predicament out of her mind as she engaged him in conversation. He visibly sagged with relief as she laid out the documents containing her detailed work agenda in front of him. Gobbling up the information, he confessed he’d had no idea where to start and thanked her profusely.
A sudden silence in the room caused her to look up. Turning to see what everyone else was looking at, the smile died on her face as she saw Ruben standing at the head of the table, staring at her with barely concealed irritation.
prayed she didn’t look as scared as she felt. She wasn’t ready to see him yet, if ever. Turning away quickly, her heart pounding, she busied herself with tidying the papers she had been discussing with Mark. Any hopes she had of making it through the meeting without having to look at him again were dashed when he spoke.
‘Thank you all for coming. I know many of you would rather be elsewhere so we will keep this brief.’