Forever and Always

Forever and Always

Book Two of the Forever and
Always Series

E. L. Todd

This is a work of fiction. All the
characters and events portrayed in this novel are fictitious or
used fictitiously. All right reserved. No part of this book may be
reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means,
including information storage and retrieval systems, without
written permission from the publisher or author, except in the case
of a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.

Forever and
Always

Published by E.L. Todd at
Smashwords

Copyright 2013 E.L. Todd

For Cindy and Doug,

My second parents and my close friends.
You always believed in me and made me feel special. Thank you for
allowing me to be a third daughter to your warm family.

“
But it was not your fault
but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really fucked it up this time
Didn't I, my dear?
Didn't I, my dear?”

“
Little Lion Man” –Mumford
and Sons

1

Sean’s arms were wrapped around me.
The smell of his skin and the feel of his body against mine were
almost unreal. I had never been so happy in my life. I almost
didn’t believe it. Sean was mine. He came all the way to Seattle
just to prove his love for me. It was so unexpected and so joyous
that I thought my heart would explode. I didn’t care about the past
anymore. As long as Sean was with me nothing else mattered. My
greatest friend was my lover. There was no misunderstanding. Sean
loved me. Me.

Sean pulled away from me and
approached the table. “Hey,” he said to Ryan. They shook hands. “Is
it cool if I date your sister?”

Ryan laughed. “Are you asking for my
permission?”

“
It’s just a
formality.”

“
Welcome to the
family.”

I wrapped my arm around Sean and he
held my hand in his own. Sean turned to Cortland. “I’m Sean,” he
said. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Cortland nodded. “I’m Cortland. And
the pleasure is all mine.”

Cortland and I shared a glance and I
knew what he meant. Was I going to tell Sean about us? Since Sean
and I weren’t together or even speaking when it happened, I didn’t
see the relevance. It was none of his business.

“
Now we have a double
date.” I smiled at Cortland.

“
Yes,” he said. “We
do.”

Sean turned to me. “I’ve never been to
Seattle before. Do you want to show me around?”

“
I would love to,” I said
as I kissed him.

“
You’re welcome to stay
with us,” Ryan said.

“
I would hope so.” I
smiled. “Since I’m paying the rent and feeding you.”

Ryan sighed. “There goes my sister
again—being a brat.”

Sean nodded. “If you don’t mind,” he
said to my brother.

“
Not in the least,” Ryan
replied. “How long are you staying?”

“
Just for the weekend,” he
said. “Then I’ll take Scarlet back home on Sunday.”

“
What do you mean?” I
asked.

“
We are going back to New
York,” he said.

I thought for a moment. This was a
complication I hadn’t considered. New York used to be my home but
it was no longer—Seattle was. I looked at Ryan, but he didn’t meet
my gaze. This was something he already anticipated and he seemed to
be fine with it—on the surface.

“
I don’t have an apartment
or a job, Sean,” I said.

“
You can live with me,” he
said. “We’ll be together all the time anyway.”

“
I don’t know,” I said
apprehensively.

“
What do you
mean?”

“
You should go, Scarlet,”
Ryan said. “New York is your home.”

I met my brother’s gaze and he was
smiling at me, giving me his permission to leave. The idea of being
away from him again made my heart ache. We had reconnected in such
a strong way, and I didn’t want to lose that, but I couldn’t make
Sean leave his job in New York. I wasn’t even sure where he would
work in Seattle.

“
We’ll discuss it later,”
I said to Sean.

Sean stared at me for a moment, but
didn’t say anything.

“
Let’s drop off your stuff
at the apartment and I’ll show you around.” I smiled.

“
Okay,” he
said.

“
We’ll see you later,” I
said to the two men. Cortland nodded and Ryan waved. Sean and I
walked out the door and headed up the street, hand in hand, as we
watched the Seattle lights in the nighttime air.

“
It’s beautiful here,” he
said.

“
I know.”

“
Do you like it here?” he
asked. “I know this is where you grew up.”

“
I do.”

“
So, what are we doing
about New York?” he asked as we approached the apartment building.
“I need to buy your ticket before they are sold out.”

I sighed. “I don’t know,
Sean.”

“
What do you
mean?”

We walked through the lobby and stood
in the elevator, rising up to the fifth floor. Sean squeezed my
hand as we left the elevator and made it to the door. “I’m not
going anywhere, Scarlet. You are the one for me. Please don’t be
scared.”

I smiled at him. “That’s not what I
was thinking.” I inserted the key in the lock and opened the door.
Sean walked inside and put his bag in the living room then looked
around the apartment. He turned his gaze back to me and I reveled
in how handsome he was. Somehow I had forgotten. Suddenly, I
realized I was wearing gym clothes because Ryan and I played
basketball for an hour. Sean seemed to read my mind.

“
You are so beautiful,” he
said. “I don’t know how I didn’t notice it before.”

My cheeks blushed from his comment. I
was wearing a baggy sweatshirt and my hair was in a loose braid. I
knew I was a mess.

“
Tell me why you don’t
want to come home with me,” he said as he stood in front of me. He
held my hand in his own and caressed my fingers. “We don’t have to
live together. I just assumed that we would—I want to. I’m with you
all the time anyway.”

I smiled at him. “I would love to live
with you.”

“
Then what’s the
problem?”

“
I—I ignored Ryan for the
past year and made no effort to stay in contact with him. When I
came back to Seattle, I saw how much that hurt him. He has been
spending the holidays with friends—sometimes alone—and now that
we’re together again, everything is better. I—I don’t know if I can
leave him again.”

Sean sighed. “We will both make an
effort to stay in touch with him, Scarlet. I’ll remind you to call
him every day. And I don’t mind spending the holidays with him. He
can even come to my family estate in Connecticut—he’s my family,
too.”

“
I don’t think Ryan would
accept that,” I whispered. “And it isn’t the same. It’s impossible
to stay close when you’re on opposite ends of the country. Without
mutual experiences, you run out of things to discuss—you don’t
connect. My brother is the one who took care of me and got me back
on my feet, despite what I did to him. I won’t do it again. I can’t
leave him, Sean.”

“
Do you feel this way
because of guilt or desire?” he asked. “Would you rather stay with
him?”

I thought for a moment. “I don’t want
to leave him.”

Sean sighed. “My job is in New York. I
can’t just leave it. I have no idea if I could even find a job here
in Seattle.”

“
I know,” I whispered. “We
can do long-distance. We can take turns flying back every
weekend.”

Sean dropped my hand and stepped back.
“Until when?” he asked. “I want to marry you at some point. We are
going to have to make a compromise eventually. Ryan can take care
of himself—he understands that you have to move on with your
life.”

His comment about marriage made my
heart flutter. “You want to marry me?”

Sean smiled at me. “I’m sorry if I
didn’t make that clear,” he said. “I want to be with you for
always. Does it change anything? Will you move to New York with
me?”

“
Let me think about it,” I
said.

“
For how long?” he asked
sadly.

“
A few weeks,” I
answered.

“
So, I won’t see you for
five days every week?” he asked. “That sounds terrible.”

“
It’ll be okay,” I said.
“It’s temporary. I’ll make a decision eventually.”

“
What other option do we
have? You either move to New York or you don’t.”

“
You could come here,” I
suggested.

“
And work where?” he
asked.

“
We would figure it out,”
I said. “I could support us until you find something.”

Sean sighed. “I appreciate that, but I
will never let you support me—ever. I refuse to let that
happen.”

I rolled my eyes. He reminded me of
Cortland in that respect.

“
I caught that,” he said.
“I’m sorry I’m being difficult, but I want this to work. I was
looking forward to being with you.”

“
I’m being difficult,
too,” I said. “Just give me some time. Let Ryan get used to the
idea of me leaving.”

“
So, you are moving then?”
he asked happily.

“
I—I don’t
know.”

Sean’s smiled dropped. “I am willing
to do a long-distance relationship—anything—to be with you. But I
want to live with you soon. We are going to have to figure it
out.”

“
I understand,” I said.
“Just give me some time. Maybe there is a way I can still see Ryan
periodically.”

Sean sighed. “Since I’m the one that
fucked this up and drove you away, I’ll be patient. This wouldn’t
be happening if I wasn’t such an idiot.”

“
I forgive you, Sean—let’s
just forget about it.”

“
I don’t deserve
you.”

I grabbed his face and kissed him
gently and his lips ignited a fire within me. His lips felt right
against mine and I knew I was meant for him—we were perfect
together. I pulled away from him. “I love you so much,” I
whispered.

Sean pressed his forehead against
mine. “I love you, too, Scar. I’m sorry that I hurt
you.”

“
It doesn’t matter
anymore,” I said.

He rubbed his nose against
mine and I felt the stress leave my body. My brother and I were
close again and Sean was mine—really
mine
. My editing company was a
success and everything was great. The student loan fiasco was still
weighing on me, but I pushed it back, wanting to forget about it
now that Sean was with me.

“
In a way, I’m glad that
this happened,” I said.

He pulled away from me.
“Why?”

“
I never would have fixed
the relationship between Ryan and I, and I never would have started
my own company. A lot of great things have happened because of
it.”

“
I’m glad,” he said. “My
life has been nothing but miserable without you. I’m grateful that
Ryan took care of you.”

I held him for a moment, and we stood
together in silence. Leaving Ryan was something I wasn’t sure I
could do. After everything we’d been through, I didn’t think I
could move away and not see him every day, especially for a guy
that hurt me so much. I promised myself I wouldn’t hurt Ryan again,
and I didn’t want to. Hopefully, Sean would just grow frustrated
with me and move to Seattle to be with me. I didn’t want to ask him
to do it because that would be selfish but I really wanted him to
do it on his own. He knew how important Ryan was to me—I couldn’t
leave him.

“
So,” he said. “Can I take
you to dinner?”

“
Well, I just
ate.”

“
When has that ever
stopped you?” He smiled.

I hit him lightly on the shoulder. We
were back to the way we were, except our relationship was
different. It seemed like we had the best of both worlds—our
friendship and our love. “Stop making fun of me.”