Forgive Me (Callaway Book 2) (22 page)

When Drew saw his mom at the table, his mind went into overdrive. "Mom, what's wrong?" He stared at his mom then at Amanda, who looked just as worried as he was. Whatever was going on, he didn't have a good feeling about it.

"Honey, you might want to sit down. You, too, sweetheart." Drew pulled out a chair for Amanda and sat next to her, holding her hand in one of his and his mother's hand in the other.

"Mom, what's going on? Are you okay?" The ball of anxiety building inside of him was threatening to come out; he hated seeing his mom so upset.

His mom shook her head as if she was trying to make sense of what she wanted to say, and that was not easing his worry. "I'm fine, baby, but I need to tell you guys something. It's probably the last thing you want to hear, or at least the last thing you thought you would hear."

"Kathy, you're worrying me. What's going on?" Amanda asked, and his mom gave her an apologetic and sympathizing look that told him something major was about to be said, something that was going to change everything. She the same look on her face the day she had told them their dad had died.

He watched as his mom took a deep breath before speaking, and Amanda squeezed his hand silently, telling him she was right there no matter what his mom was about to say. "About an hour ago, a young woman pulled up to the main house asking for you. I told her you weren't available, but she didn't look good, not at all. She insisted on talking with you and when I wouldn't let her in the house, she walked to her car and opened the back door. She had a four-year-old little girl with her. She walked up to me, told me the girl was your daughter, and that she couldn't do it anymore. She handed me the child and then she just left."

It had to be a sick joke. It couldn't be true. No way did he have a daughter he knew nothing about. It had to be a mistake. He leaned back in his chair, desperate to get some air in his lungs "What? Mom, you believed her? This is bullshit."

His mom looked at him with understanding, and he knew she would have never let a child come into their house if she didn't have a good reason to believe the little girl was his. "Honey, one look at that little girl and there's no denying she's yours. She looks just like you. Her name is Lucy. She's fragile. I don't think I have ever seen a child look that broken."

His head started spinning. This couldn't be happening to him, not when he and Amanda had everything worked out. "I am not a father. I would have known. Why would someone keep my child away from me?" He dropped his head between his legs and covered his face with his hands, trying to get a handle on the emotions swimming through his body at the moment. Could he really have a daughter he knew nothing about? And what kind of mother would just leave their child like that?

The next words out of his mother's mouth reminded him of the past he was so desperately trying to forget. "You and I both know you weren't really in a state of mind to keep score four years ago. Now, I'm not saying you did something stupid, and I am not saying this woman did the right thing not reaching out to you when she found out she was pregnant, but I
am
telling you that the little four-year-old girl who is sleeping in your bed is your daughter."

"This has to be a mistake. How could she just leave her child like that?" he yelled, feeling himself growing more out of control with every passing second.

"Drew, baby, look at me," Amanda soothed. You need to pull it together because if that little girl
is
yours, you're all she has left. You need to be strong for her. This might not be how you wanted to become a father, but this is the hand you've been dealt." Amanda's voice calmed him as her fingers ran circles on his back. He listened to her words, not understanding how she could be so damn calm about the situation when he was ready to punch a hole in the wall. She should've been screaming or walking out on him, but she wasn't doing either. She was right there with him, like she said she would be.

"I don't know anything about how to be a dad, Amanda. This is not something I'm ready for." He dropped his head on her lap and buried his face in her smell. He needed to feel anchored to something, and in that moment, he realized just how strong their bond was. The room fell silent for a few seconds until she forced his head up. When he looked at her, he didn't see resentment, but he saw anger, and it was directed at him.

"You had an amazing father growing up. Yes, he was taken away from you way too soon, but you had Cole, and that man was the best example of a father any man could ever have. Drew, look at me. You are not alone in this. You have your mom and your family, and you have me. I'm not going anywhere. We are going to handle this together. We are a team, and we will work this out together." Her voice was calm and steady as she spoke to him.

He didn't understand how she could be so okay with the fact that some random woman he had sex with had just dropped off his kid. "You're telling me that my having a daughter with someone else is okay with you? Amanda, this is not okay."

He watched her closely as she took a deep breath, looking at his mom before focusing her attention back on him. "It is what it is, Drew, but that mother abandoned her child. She's our responsibility now. We don't know what kind of shape that child is in, or what her home environment was like. We need to be a unit if we're going to get through this."

"You said
our
responsibility." His head was spinning, trying to make sense of everything. How could his life change so fast in the blink of an eye? One minute, he was ready to take Amanda home and fuck her senseless, but the next, he was sitting at his mother's kitchen table, finding out he had a daughter he knew nothing about.

She took both of his hands and looked him right in the eye. "I'm in this with you." She kissed him, and in that little gesture laid the promise that she wasn't going anywhere.

I'm a dad. Shit, this changes everything.

"Let's allow her to sleep tonight, and we can all deal with this together in the morning. You guys can take Cole's old room for the night, and I'll talk to your brothers," his mother told them.

"You're right. Thank you, Mom." Drew was barely aware of walking up the stairs and climbing into bed with Amanda. When she tucked her body against his, he held her so tight she would probably have marks in the morning, but he couldn't let her go.

"What do you think she's like?" he asked Amanda as he held her as tightly as possible.

"If she's anything like you, she's incredible." God, what had he done to deserve this woman? He pressed a soft kiss to her hair before drifting off to sleep.

Chapter Eleven

Drew stood at
Cole's bedroom window and watched the sun rise. His head still spun from what had happened the night before. He couldn't get a handle on the fact that the little girl sleeping in the room next to his was his own flesh and blood. Even worse, how could a mother just leave her child with strangers like that? Throughout the night, all he could think about was that he knew nothing about four-year-old girls. The only experience he had with babies was when Becca was born, and even then that was a close interaction limited to rocking or feeding her while his mom was present. This was much different. This was a tiny person who needed support and guidance. She needed a father, and he didn't even know if he could be that. Sure, he had thought about having kids with Amanda, but that was in his future plans; he hadn't expected to be thrown this curveball.

Did she even know who he was? How would she react to her mother being gone? Would she like living with him? Did she have any allergies? What did she like to eat? All of those questions were answers a father should know, but he didn't. Soon, he felt the anxiety in his body being replaced with anger—anger that he had a child he didn't know about, anger that the mother hadn't contacted him, and anger that he had missed out on the first four years of Lucy's life.

Amanda stirred in his arms and when he looked at her, his heart was overwhelmed by how much he loved her. When his mom had told them about Lucy being dropped off, she could have walked away. She could have told him she hadn't signed up for this, that it was his situation to handle, but she hadn't. She'd given him her unconditional support and in that moment, he had loved her even more. She was standing by him, and that meant more to him than she could ever know.

She pressed a soft kiss on his chest, right over his heart. As she spoke, her voice was still sleepy. "Did you get any sleep?" She braced her elbows on his chest and dropped her head to her hands. She looked as exhausted as he probably did, yet she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. Not just because of how gorgeous she was on the outside, but because the beauty she had inside shined through like sun rays.

He brushed back a strand of hair from her face. "Not much, you?"

She shook her head from side to side as she answered. "I got a couple of hours. How are you holding up?"

"It still feels like it's not real, you know? I mean, why did she wait this long to get in touch with me? Why did she keep my daughter away from me for so long? Why did she just leave her here like that? There's a child sleeping in the room next door who I know nothing about."

She leaned forward and kissed his lips softly, the kind of kiss that was meant to be reassuring and supportive. "Baby, you may never know the answers to those questions. You can't hold on to the whys. You have a daughter sleeping in the next room who we know nothing about, and we don't know if she even knows you're her dad. This is going to be a 'one day at a time' situation. It's going to take some time, but she's going to love you."

"How are you so calm about this?" he asked when she finished talking. It was one of the things he had a hard time wrapping his head around. If the roles had been reversed, he would be freaking out. Yet here she was, as calm as ever. He didn't understand why she wasn't yelling or screaming or, hell, why she wasn't even crying?

"You were honest with me about your past, Drew, and I accepted it because I love you. Now, I'm not saying I was mentally ready for what went down last night, but I love you. And that little girl in there is a part of you, which means I love her just as much. I will be there for her and for you in whatever way you need me." He could hear the raw emotions in her voice and when one tear trailed down her cheek, he wiped it away with his thumb.

When she smiled at him, he knew everything would be okay because they would do this together. "You are incredible. How did I get so lucky?"

"I think we both got lucky to find each other again," she told him, smiling.

In that moment, his brain found peace, but as fast as he had found it, it was gone. "I don't even have clothes for her. I don't know anything about four-year-old girls. Hell, I don't even have a room for her here."

She sat up, crossed her legs and Drew groaned at the sight of her bare thighs barely covered by his T-shirt. She smiled at him like she knew exactly what she was doing and he was more than happy to have the distraction, even if it was just for a second.

He watched her body tense as she got ready to talk, and he couldn't help but worry about what she would say. He wasn't sure he could handle any more hard news for at least the next couple of months. "I was wondering about that last night, and I was thinking you guys could move in with me. I mean, since she just got here and you spend most of the time at my place anyway it shouldn't be too much of another a shock for her. We could fix up the spare bedroom and have her choose whatever she wants. That way, she feels like she's a part of the process."

He let her words sink in for a few moments because he wasn't sure he had heard her right. This would not only change his life; it would change hers, drastically. He wasn't sure if she understood just how much. "Are you sure about this? This is a big move, Amanda. There's no going back from this."

"I'm sure. Do you not want to move in?" He hated the doubt he was seeing on her face.

He grabbed her by the hips and lifted her over him so she was straddling him. He straightened his back so their upper bodies were pressed together and caged her face with his hands as he rubbed small circles with his thumb on her cheeks. "Fuck, yes, I want to move in. I just don't want to overwhelm you."

"We're in this together. I love you, Drew." She kissed him, but that time it wasn't light. It was full of passion and pent-up feelings that translated through the way her lips touched his.

With every lick of her tongue, and every bite on his lips, he felt the stress of the night before leave his body. He dropped a hand to her ass and grabbed the back of her neck with the other, deepening the kiss, strengthening their bond as he took over. He licked and nipped the corner of her mouth and kissed her until she was the only thing he felt.

When she started moaning and he felt her core rocking against his hardening erection, he knew he had to stop before things got out of hand. As much as he wanted to lay her down and spread her open for his pleasure, this wasn't the time or the place. He slowed down and pressed soft kisses to her chin and nose before dropping his forehead to hers, his eyes looking into hers. "I love you, too. Thank you."

She smiled at him. "Now, how about you go see if she's up?"

His heart started beating faster. He had no idea what he was supposed to say. Should he wait for his mom? There wasn't a manual to tell him how to handle a situation like this, and that made him nervous. The last thing he wanted to do was scare the child or make her feel uncomfortable or feel unwelcomed. "What do I say to her? I can't just walk in that room, and say 'Hi, I'm your dad'."

"Just let her lead, and you'll be fine. I'll stand right beside the door, so if you need me I'll be there to help you." He watched Amanda as she climbed out of bed and pulled on a pair of jeans and a shirt his mom had gotten for her since they hadn't gone home to change from the wedding. When she was fully dressed and she saw he hadn't moved, she put her hands on her hips, and tilted her head, and gave him a 'why are you still in bed'
look. He followed her lead and grabbed his dress pants from the night before, smiling when she handed him a shirt Cole had left behind.