Fully Automatic (Bullet) (16 page)

Chapter Seventeen

THEY’D LOADED THE
van and trailer back up with all their equipment, and Brad could hear the next band warming up.  He hoped the audience was as on fire for them as they’d been for Fully Automatic.  It usually worked that way—if the first band could get a momentum going, it would continue through the night…unless the second band completely sucked.

But when they were done, Brad sought out Val again.  When he found her, she was alone.  The first band hadn’t started playing yet, were just checking things out, so he knew he had about three minutes.  Once they started playing, he wouldn’t be able to talk at all.  “Hey,” he said, taking the opportunity to hold Val in his arms again
, hugging her.  “Still want to kill me?”

She smiled. “Yeah.  A little.”

“They loved you.”

“They loved
us
.”

He shook his head.  “Nope.  I know better.”  She rolled her eyes, but it wasn’t subject for debate.  She knew it and so did he, and he’d find a better time and place to discuss the future with her.  For now, though, he wanted her to relish the feelings she’d had onstage.  “So…wanna party with us after?”

“Maybe.  I came with Jill and Chad, though.  Is it okay if they come along?”

“Of course.  The more, the merrier, right?”  It was time to ask the more important question.  “You coming to tomorrow night’s show too?”

“I wanted to but…oh, yeah.  Never mind.”

“What?”

“Well, I didn’t think I was gonna have money for tickets, but I forgot Chad and Jill paid for their own.”

“So?  Text me when you get there, and I’ll get you in the back door.”

“Actually, it’s a bar, so should I even be there?”

“Who cares?  If you’re with me, they can’t say shit.  You’re part of the band.”

“Oh, no.  You’re not getting me to sing again.”

Brad smirked, searching her eyes.  “You trying to tell me you didn’t like that?”

“No, I did.  But I don’t want to get too used to it.”

“Why not?”

She didn’t answer, because her friends Jill and Chad returned to her side.  She used their presence as an excuse to avoid his question.  “Hey, guys.  Brad wanted to know if we want to party with them after the concert.”

Chad said, “Probably not.  Sorry.  I have to work in the morning.”

“Not a problem.”  Brad felt his heart sink, but he wasn’t going to push her.  He never had and wasn’t going to now.  She would come to him when she was ready.  “You’ll be partying tomorrow night too, right?”

“If you have to ask, you don’t know me very well.”

She rolled her eyes.  “And you’ll be in my hometown tomorrow night.”

He smiled.  “Yeah.”
  Zane, Nick, and even Ethan joined the four of them to enjoy the other two bands.  Brad got brave at one point and draped his arm around Val’s shoulder.  He was relieved when she let him and even reciprocated the gesture.

After the show, the crowd started shuffling out, one body at a time.  It had been a great show and most folks were reluctant to let it go.  Brad and the entire band walked out with Val and her friends, and she hugged each guy in the band
, even Ethan, wishing them a good night and telling them she’d enjoyed the show.  Chad shook all the guys’ hands too.  He said to Brad, “You guys are kick ass.  I hope to see you on a label someday.”

“That’s the plan.”  Brad turned to tell Val goodbye one more time and saw her in Ethan’s arms.  His friend not only held her close to his body, he was kissing her hard on the mouth…and Val was letting him.

What a fucking idiot Brad had been.  Yeah, sure, there might have been something between him and Val, but Ethan had a hell of a pull on the girl.  From what Brad knew, Ethan had shit all over her multiple times, and she just came back for more.

Well, no, that wasn’t fair.  He also knew
Ethan was a charming son of a bitch, and Val didn’t exactly look like she was reciprocating.  She wasn’t pushing him away, though, and that too was telling.  So, after they left, Brad pulled Zane aside before they headed to the van.  “That offer still stand?”

“What—the twins?”

Brad chuckled.  They weren’t exactly twins, but…  “Yeah.”

Zane whipped his phone out of his pocket. 
“Just one text away.”

“Do it.”

Zane gave him a look but started thumbing his phone.

Ethan asked, “We leaving?”

“Hold on a minute.”

“What’s up?” Ethan asked.

Zane said, “Chick patrol.”

“We scorin’ tonight?”

“Fuck, yeah.”

“Well, hold on.  C’mon, Nick.  You were eyein’ that one blonde girl, right?”

“Which one?”  Nick laughed as the two of them headed toward the receding crowd.

“Should we wait by the van?”

Zane said, “Yeah, let me tell ‘em.”  He tapped out a text while they walked out the back door.  A few minutes later, Ethan and Nick arrived at the van, girls in tow, but Zane and Brad were still waiting.

Inside, Brad was seething.  His friend—his
brother
, for fuck’s sake—could kiss Valerie, rob Brad of her undying love, and then without another thought pick up another girl.  Brad was going to do the same thing, but that was because he’d once again been rejected.  If Val had chosen him, he wouldn’t even
look
at another girl.

It was like a knife in his heart.

And so, when the Asian girl with the beautiful black hair sat in the passenger seat of the van and smiled at him, he smiled back and said, “Hang on,” putting the van in gear and cranking the music to drown out his thoughts.

* * *

Why did he always manage to get a girl in the bathroom?  Things had been hot and steamy in the hotel room all four guys had crammed into.  As usual, the girls Ethan and Nick had chosen knew no shame, but the girls Zane and Brad were with had a little more modesty and self-respect.  Zane asked for the keys to the van, and Brad handed them over.  Shortly after, his girl (a girl who went by the name of Ginger) pulled him up off the chair where they’d been making out and led him into the bathroom.

It was a moment of truth.  Brad started to back out, because he felt bad.  He cared about Valerie, wanted to be with
her
, and instead he had this beautiful girl in front of him pulling his zipper down.  She would be nothing but a one-night stand, and Brad had never done that before, not even with his mother’s older friend Misti.  To not know this girl’s last name and engage in intimate relations…well, that was Ethan’s thing, not his.  Still, she was kissing his neck, and she’d already gotten in his pants and was stroking his cock. 
Whoa
.  Okay, so there was no way he could stop it now.  Jesus.

“Tell me you got a condom, big boy.”

The way she breathed the words made his cock swell more.  Holy shit.  So, yeah, he could do this, but he hoped he could get Val out of his head for the few minutes they’d be physically entwined.  “Uh, yeah,” he said and reached around for his wallet.  It wasn’t long before the damn thing was hugging his dick, and he was pounding into her like there was no tomorrow.

She was a screamer.  From the second he
entered her, she started screeching and carrying on, moaning and groaning and crying his name.  He suspected much of it was for show, but he didn’t care.  It did something for him anyway, and he just kept driving into her.  He probably should have worried more about her and if she was getting what she needed, but he was too focused on numbing his mind with sex.

Her howling became more intense.  Had she come or not?  He couldn’t tell.  He sometimes had a hard time telling anyway, but it was even more difficult this time and with this girl.  He’d have thought she was coming when he slammed into her the first time.  But that was it—he couldn’t hold it back anymore.  He could feel it in his balls as his brain exploded.  He’d made some kind of sounds too—he wasn’t sure what.  He was completely out of it by that point.

As he regained his senses, he tried to get his breathing under control.  She was smiling, her head resting against the wall of the bathroom.  He wasn’t sure, though, so he asked her, “Was that okay for you?”

She giggled.  “Okay?  That was incredible.”

And, with that, his thoughts returned to Valerie, and he felt guilty.

He shouldn’t, though.  If she had her choice, she’d choose Ethan every time over him.  He was starting to realize that.  So he shouldn’t feel guilty about taking care of himself.

And yet, even while he drove the girls home early the next morning, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d betrayed Val.

Chapter Eighteen

THE NEXT AFTERNOON, Fully Automatic was back on the road, heading toward Winchester.  Brad was feeling a little better about the night before.  The guilt was gone, replaced by the realization that he had to learn to look out for number one.

This show was the same as the night before, even down to the bands.  So they got to the venue—a biker bar called Bad Boys—and set up.  A
while before show time, he got a text from Val saying she was almost there.  He texted her back, telling her to come to the back of the building.

He was leaning against the wall, trying to look casual, trying not to be upset with her.  First and foremost, they were friends, and she’d never promised him a thing.  In fact, he was the fool who kept trying to win her over.  The sooner he realized it was a losing battle, the sooner he could get on with his life and be happy.

She rounded the corner, and he stuck his phone in his back pocket.  Fuck.  He’d never seen her dressed like that.  It wasn’t fair.  How was he supposed to get her out of his head when she looked like that?  He’d been smiling, but he was pretty sure he looked ravenous now.  He caught his breath and let out a long whistle to let her know he appreciated what he saw.  A short black leather skirt and red t-shirt, and they highlighted every asset she had. She grinned at him as he said, “I do believe this is the first time I’ve seen your legs, young lady.”  He stood up, ready to lead her inside the building.  “Sure I can’t talk you into singing with me again tonight?  You kicked ass doing it on the fly last night.”

She was giving it some thought.  He wasn’t going to push her, but he hoped she’d give in to her passion.  After several long seconds, she said,
“Yeah, okay.”

“Good.  Now I can take
Worrying that Valerie’s gonna kill me
off my list.  Seriously, you won’t have to worry about being underage in there then, because you’re part of us.”  He started walking, showing her inside.  “Maybe we could have you do
two
songs.  Maybe you should sing ‘Metal Forever.’  I fucking love that song.”

“Oh, no.  I’m not stepping on Ethan’s toes.”

They started walking through the hallway, and he lowered his voice.  He was a little pissed that she didn’t feel like she could sing it.  “
You
wrote the goddamned song, Val.  It should be your choice.”

She
stopped walking and after a few seconds, he turned to face her.  “I wrote it for
him
.  He sings it.  End of story.”

He s
miled.  Sometimes she was exasperating, but he could appreciate where she was coming from.  “Fine.  But you’re cool with a duet again?”  She nodded, but he decided to try going one step further.  “Or would you rather sing it solo this time?”

“What would
you
rather do?”

“I asked you.”

She was quiet for a few moments, but then she said, “As tempting as it is, Brad, the audience is here to see Fully Automatic, not Fully Automatic and some unknown named Valerie Quinn.  I would be cheating your audience if I sang it solo.” 

“That’s cool.”

They started walking toward the stage and Val said, “Besides, we sound good together.”

Yeah, he thought they could do a lot of good things together, but no way was
he gonna say that.  Val would have to realize it herself.

They made it to the stage where Zane was helping Nick set up his drum kit and Ethan was messing around with his guitar.  He saw Valerie give Ethan a hopeful look, but
his friend never looked up.  Brad looked at Zane and Nick and asked, “Got this?”

“Almost done.”

When he turned around, he saw Val looking out over the bar.  It was about the same size as the venue the night before, but it was closed to packed already.  He draped an arm over Val’s shoulders.  “Sure I can’t talk you into singing one more song?”  He knew she was going to turn him down again, but he had to give it a shot.

“Yes, I’m sure.
  So, where do I hang until then?  Can I join the audience?”

“Maybe you could, but I’m not sure how we’d get you back up here in a smooth fashion.  You wanna just hang out over there by the side of the stage, kinda out of the way?  Maybe we could get a chair out of one of the rooms in back.”

“I guess that would be okay.”  She started looking around the stage.

“Let me see if I can find a chair somewhere.”  He went backstage to look for one, but it hadn’t escaped his notice that Val made a beeline for Ethan as he walked down the stairs.

Payne, you are a fucking idiot if you think she sees you as anything more than a distraction.

Yeah, he
knew
that—and yet he felt helpless to resist her.

When he returned with a chair, he was relieved to see Val was talking with Zane and Nick.  When he got the chair in place, off stage but with a decent view of what would be happening onstage, he showed it to Val.

Not long after, they were performing once again, and Brad forced himself to keep his eyes forward, on the crowd.  Yeah, he was tempted to look over at Val, but he didn’t want to set himself up for disappointment, because she’d probably be watching Ethan the whole time.  When it was time to ask her to join him for the duet, it was as magical as the night before, except it seemed even smoother.  It was like they’d been singing together for months.  And, like the night before, Val got a lot of audience attention—cheers, applause, and general appreciation—and he hoped it would fuel her fire.

When their show was over, he asked her if she was going to party with them after the concert was over.  “I promised, didn’t I?”  Yeah, she had, but he wanted to make sure.

It didn’t take them long to get the equipment loaded into the van and trailer, but before they went back inside to watch the next band play, Brad wanted to show the van off to Val.  She was teasing him about it, comparing it to a tour bus, and he said, “Gotta start somewhere.  At least, tucked in all the right places, we can fit all of us
and
any extra shit we need to tote that won’t fit in the trailer.  When we get more of our own amps and shit, the little trailer won’t cut it anymore.  For now, though, it works.”

“Where’d you get it?”

“I bought it from a church that was upgrading to a newer model.  If you look closely, you can see the old lettering I had to peel off.”

“Very cool.”
  She looked like she was impressed.  He hoped so.  He wanted to show her that anything was possible if she set her mind to it.  Sure, his life was pretty much shit right now, but it didn’t feel that way.  Every time he got onstage, it felt like he was doing the right thing.

They went back inside to enjoy the other two bands.  He noticed that Val was trying to be subtle, but she was looking for Ethan nonetheless.  She seemed to finally relax and let it go, but Brad knew what his friend was doing.  He’d already started the party somewhere around the
venue—it might have been backstage in one of the rooms back there or outside somewhere, but knowing Ethan, he had booze, drugs, and women in tow, and he was already having a good time.  He wanted to shake Val and ask what the appeal of his friend was.  Sure, the guy was disarmingly good looking, and Brad also knew he was charming as hell.  He’d seen his friend talk himself out of trouble more times than not to realize he had an unnerving way of captivating people in his gaze.  But he knew that Ethan had hurt Val more than once, so why was it she seemed to be begging for more?

True to form, though, his friend showed up right before it was time to leave
—he was backstage, surrounded by several hot women, and he saw Val’s face drop.  How was it Ethan had such a hold on her?

He couldn’t dwell on it.  It made no sense, but it was what it was, and all he could do would be to bide his time…if he could hang on that long.  After Ethan had pissed all over her, he would have thought she’d have told him off, but she kept going back for more.

They got to the van and he unlocked it.  He slid the side door open and said, “All you motherfuckers in back.  Val is riding shotgun with me.  You guys work out the details amongst yourselves back there.”

He opened Val’
s door and helped her inside, then he got in on the driver’s side.  He told everyone to “Buckle up,” refraining from adding
bitches
at the end.  But he leaned over and whispered to Val, “There aren’t enough seats for all of ‘em.  This should be fun.”  He started up the van and put it into reverse.  It was a feat he’d gotten better at when the trailer was attached, but he had to pay attention.  He saw in the rearview mirror that Ethan had solved the problem by placing one of the blonde twins on his lap.  Once he was able to put the van back in drive, he glanced over at Val.  He needed to distract her.  “You like being onstage, don’t you?”

“Well, yeah…”

“You should do it more often.  You’re good at it.”

That was when the shenanigans in the back started getting vocal—giggling, whisper
ing, and—for all Brad knew—possible foreplay.  He didn’t want to hear that shit and he knew Val didn’t need to either, so he cranked the music on the stereo—some kick ass Betraying the Martyrs—to drown it all out.  Then he headed back to the motel, wondering if both he and Val would wind up miserable this night.