Golden Trail (83 page)

“Honey –”

Her head still shaking she talked over him.
“I can’t make you do that.”

She started sliding down the wall, her knees
to her chest, her hand still lifted as if to fend him off.

“I can’t make you do that,” she
repeated.

Layne crouched in front of her two feet
away.

“Baby, can’t make me do what?” he
whispered.

“Lose me,” she whispered back.

“You’re not goin’ anywhere,” he told
her.

“I’m going to die.”

Layne’s body froze.

Then he whispered, “What?”

“She was thirty-nine when she died. That’s
next year for me, Layne.”

“Rocky –”

“That’s what I’m going to get, for not
helping her. I’m going to die when she died. I know, I’ve always
known, I’ll never make it. I’ll never make it. I knew what it would
feel like to lose you and I knew you’d feel the same way if you
lost me. Like Dad. You’d be like Dad. If we had the chance to have
a life, I knew you’d never move on.” Her hand dropped and she
wrapped both arms around her legs but her eyes didn’t leave his,
they were burning into him and his chest was burning, his throat
and he could do nothing but hold her eyes. “I left you to give you
a life, baby,” she whispered, her voice hoarse, the tears hitting
her eyes, sliding down, silent. “I wanted you to have a life.”

“That’s why you left me?” he asked
quietly.

She nodded. “I didn’t want you to hurt. I
knew how bad it hurt. I felt it. Saw it in Merry. Saw it in Dad. I
didn’t want you to hurt.”

“Rocky, come to me.”

“We can’t have a baby girl, she won’t have a
Momma,” Rocky whispered.

Layne’s voice was rough when he begged,
“Please, baby, come to me.”

“I know what it’s like to lose your
Momma.”

“Baby, please.”

“I can’t sit at the table with the family,
Layne. I let my family die, left her all alone to die, crouched
like a coward in the dark and listened to her scream while I let
her die.”

“You didn’t let her die, honey, Fisher
killed her.”

“I can’t sit at the table when I let my
family die.”

Layne was done.

“I’m comin’ to you, Roc.”

She shook her head as the tears slid down
her face, off her jaw to hit her sweater.

“Right now, baby, I’m coming to you.”

She kept shaking her head as he moved to her
and he braced for a fight but when he got to her, she surged into
him, pressing in, deep and tight. He twisted and sat in the corner,
she crawled into his lap, curling into a ball, her arms attached
around his neck like she was never going to let him go and the
tears came. Not tears. Great, wracking, body rocking sobs.

He held her close and looked up to see
Devin, Tripp and Jasper had moved in.

“Dave’s gonna get here and he’ll have called
Merry. They don’t approach. I don’t care what you do but I don’t
want them up here until Doc sees to her.”

“Gotcha, son,” Devin whispered.

“Go, close the door,” Layne ordered.

Devin nodded, he turned but Jasper and Tripp
didn’t move, their eyes were glued to their father.

“Go,” Layne whispered.

Dev’s arms came out and he hooked both
Layne’s boys, gently turning them and guiding them away.

Rocky shoved her face deeper into his neck,
Layne dropped his head and spoke in her ear.

“We’re gonna work this out of you,
baby.”

She shook her head.

“Swear, Roc, swear, I’m gonna take care of
you. Yeah?”

She didn’t answer, just pressed deeper.

Layne’s arms got tight. “Love you,
Raquel.”

Another sob tore up her throat but, thank
fuck, she held on.

* * * * *

Doc slid Rocky’s hair off her neck then his
eyes came to Layne.

“You can let her go, son, she’s sleeping,”
Doc whispered.

“Get Ma,” Layne ordered.

Doc looked into his eyes, took a breath in
his nose and nodded. Then he walked out of the room.

Layne was in bed, shoulders to the
headboard, Rocky curled asleep on top of him. Doc had administered
the injection while she was still sobbing, Christ, so many tears.
He didn’t know a body had that many tears. She didn’t struggle. She
took the shot and slowly faded to quiet in his arms.

Now it was now and he knew both Dave and
Merry were downstairs. He knew too that they had lost a wife, a
mother.

And he didn’t fucking care.

Vera slid into the room and her eyes went
directly to him.

“Get in bed, Ma.”

She nodded and hurried to Rocky’s side of
the bed. She sat like Layne was sitting and he turned Rocky into
her outstretched arms. When Rocky’s head settled on his mother’s
chest and Vera had pulled Rocky’s arm around her belly, Layne slid
out of bed.

“Don’t let her go,” Layne whispered.

“I won’t, honey,” Vera whispered back.

Layne walked to the door, closed it and he
should have taken a breath. He should have taken three.

He didn’t.

He stalked down the stairs.

Everyone was in the kitchen, Dev, Tripp,
Jas, Doc, Dave and Merry.

Dave was sitting at the island. Merry was
standing beside it.

“How is –?” Dave started but stopped when
Layne stalked straight to Merry.

Merry’s face was ravaged with worry but that
didn’t penetrate the fury spiraling around Layne. What it did was
bring Merry’s guard down so he didn’t move fast enough which meant
Layne got close, wrapped his hand tight around Merry’s throat and
he kept walking, pushing Merry back.

“Dad!” Tripp shouted.

Merry’s hands came up to Layne’s forearm as
Layne squeezed.

“Tanner!” Dave yelled.

“Boy!” Devin yelled too but Layne shoved
Merry against the wall, pinned him there with his body and got in
his face, still squeezing.

“Twenty-four years, you asshole, twenty-four
years, you left that festering in her head.”

“Boy, stand down,” Devin ordered, his hand
on Layne’s back but Layne twitched his body, throwing off Devin’s
hand and he squeezed Merry’s throat harder.

“You knew,” Layne clipped as Merry choked.
“You knew that’s why she left me. You knew that was torturing her.
And you left her to that agony.”

“Tanner, son, please,” Dave was close and
Layne turned to him, his other arm shooting up, he pointed a finger
right in Dave’s face.

“You’re not right here, old man, because
you’re an old man. You deserve worse,” he growled and Dave’s pale
face grew paler.

“Brother,” Merry choked.

Layne jerked his head around and got in
Merry’s face again. “I’m not your brother,” he bit out.

Merry’s eyes narrowed and he yanked on
Layne’s forearm. “You don’t get it.”

“I fuckin’ well do, it leaked straight from
her eyes into my skin, you asshole.”

“You don’t get it,” Merry rasped.

“What didn’t sink into my skin filled my
head, she told me, Garrett. She
told
me.”

“She made us promise, Tanner,” Dave said
behind him, his tone pleading.

Jasper got close and whispered, “Stand down,
Dad.”

Layne stayed in Merry’s face and stared in
his eyes. It didn’t occur to him Merry wasn’t struggling except to
keep Layne’s hand from squeezing the life out of him.

“Dad, stand down,” Jasper repeated, Layne’s
body locked before he pushed off, shoving Merry deeper into the
wall as he took a step away.

“You aren’t welcome in this house,” he
announced as both Merry’s hands went to his throat.

“Please listen to me, son,” Dave begged and
Layne turned to him.

“You want me to listen now? Is that right?
Now you want me to listen,” Layne asked sarcastically.

“Devin told us it was bad up there,” Dave
said quietly.

“Yeah, Dave, I guess you could describe it
as
bad
, watchin’ my woman relive a nightmare where she heard
her mother scream through torture, you could describe that as
bad.
”

Dave flinched then his face got hard.
“That’s my wife you’re talkin’ about.”

“No, Dave, that’s
your daughter
I’m
talkin’ about.”

Dave’s jaw clenched.

“She made us promise, Tanner,” Merry said
softly and Layne turned to him.

“Yeah, she did? What’d she make you
promise?” Layne asked.

“When she left you, she was out of it, like
what you saw but worse, it lasted two days,” Merry explained.

Two days. Rocky said she’d lost two days.
She didn’t remember it.

Fuck.

“And, what? You call Doc?” Layne’s eyes cut
to Doc. “They call you?”

“Nope,” Doc answered, his eyes were sharp
and he was pissed, Layne could tell. “Didn’t get a call. Offered
it, when she was fourteen and I knew this would play with her mind.
But I didn’t get a call Tanner, not at fourteen, or fifteen, or
–”

“We could handle it in the family,” Dave
snapped.

“Right, see you did a fine job with that,
Dave,” Doc snapped back.

“This is none of your concern,” Dave shot
back.

“Was my concern when you brought her in with
appendicitis. Was my concern when she had a chest infection. Was my
concern when she dislocated her shoulder. The mind is a part of the
body, Dave, and I’ve been her doctor for over three decades. It’s
my goldarned concern!” Doc returned.

Jesus, the old guy remembered all that?
Fucking hell.

“We were handling it in the family,” Dave
repeated.

“And I wasn’t family?” Layne asked and
Dave’s eyes shot to him.

“What?”

“Eighteen years ago, when she turned then, I
wasn’t family?”

Dave closed his eyes slowly.

“Answer me, Dave, wasn’t I family?”

Dave’s eyes opened. “Tanner –”

Layne leaned forward and roared, “
Wasn’t
I family?
”

“She made us promise, Tanner,” Merry
whispered and Layne swung around to face him. “You saw her, you saw
the way she could be. Wouldn’t you promise anything,
anything
, to stop her from being like that?”

“No,” Layne shook his head. “No, I would
not. What I’d do, no matter what she said, how she acted, what she
threatened, was understand she needed some serious fucking help and
get it for her.
”

“Even if that meant losing her?” Merry shot
back.

“Yes,
brother
, even if that meant
losing her because even if I had to sleep at night without her, I’d
know she wasn’t tortured by her mother’s dying screams. So, yes.
Absolutely.”

A muscle ticked in Merry’s jaw, he turned
his head and looked away.

“Losing Cecilia happened to all of us,
Tanner,” Dave noted and Layne looked at him.

“I’ve no idea, pray to God I never do. You
all had it tough but you didn’t listen to her die, Dave, your
daughter did. You didn’t have the tools to deal with Rocky and you
should have found someone who had those tools. You should have
talked to Doc. You should have taken care of her.”

“I did,” Dave returned.

“No, Dave, you didn’t. You didn’t then, you
didn’t seven years later when she cut me out of her life and you
knew, you and Merry, you both knew and don’t bother denying it, you
knew
I was the only one who could heal those wounds and you
let her cut me out. And you aren’t now because you’re standing
there, in total denial and not admitting how huge a fuck up you
perpetrated.”

“I lost my wife!” Dave shouted.

“I’m sorry about that, Dave,” Layne
whispered. “But you didn’t lose your life so that means it was your
responsibility to get your head outta your fuckin’ ass and take
care of your daughter.”

“Dad,” Tripp called softly, “you’re bein’
too hard on Uncle Dave.”

Layne turned to his son. “That’s not my job,
Tripp, lookin’ out for Dave. That’s my woman up there.” He jerked
his finger to the ceiling. “It’s my job to look after
her
.”
He turned back to Dave and swept through Merry with his glance. “It
goes without sayin’ you shoulda let me in on this shit eighteen
years ago but that’s done. Then you had a second shot, both of you,
I asked, I fuckin’ begged, and you still kept this shit to
yourself.”

“This was coming back up for all of us,
Tanner,” Dave defended himself. “Knowing why she left you, knowing
it might surface again, not only for her, but for all of us. This
wasn’t exactly easy.”

“You have turns like that?” Layne asked.

“No, but I feel Fisher in my bones every
time it rains,” Dave returned.

“So, you think, maybe
all
of you
might need some help to sort your shit out?” Layne suggested
derisively. “So you could deal with that pain in your bones, Merry
could get his head sorted after leavin’ the only woman he’s ever
loved and Roc wouldn’t have to endure another turn?”

“Dad and I talked and we thought, she had
another episode, this time, we would have your back,” Merry said
and Layne’s eyes locked on him.

“Well, you didn’t, you weren’t here. My boys
and my mother had my back.”

Merry stared at him a beat before he
nodded.

Layne kept talking. “Rocky, she loves you,
she’ll always love you. Me, I’m feelin’ a fuckuva lot different.
She’s in my house and she’s under my watch now. I want you two
gone. I know you’ll be back and I know I’ll have to deal but, right
now, I want you two gone.”

Dave puffed out his chest. “I want to see my
daughter.”

“You’ll have to call her tomorrow,” Layne
replied.

“I want to see her now.”

“She’s sleepin’ in my bed now, Dave, so,
like I said, you’re gonna have to wait until tomorrow.”

“She’s my daughter, Tanner,” Dave
hissed.

“Dad, let’s go,” Merry whispered.

“No, I’m not –” Dave started.

“Dad… let’s…
go,
” Merry clipped.

“He can’t tell me when I can see my
daughter,” Dave shot back.

“Yeah, Dad, he can,” Merry returned.

“He can’t.”