Good Greek Girls Don't (9 page)

‘Explain to me why a guy would be so eager to call as soon as I give him my number and now it's gone nine and still no call?' Michael's a guy, he plays these stunts, he should have the answers.

‘Explain to me why you care, Des? No guy has ever gotten you so wired.'

I don't know why I care, and I don't know why I called Michael. He's supposed to be explaining the mystery of men to me, not laughing at my predicament.

‘I don't care. But you guys need to be considerate. If you say you're going to call, pick up the bloody phone and call. Don't keep women hanging.' I think I need to take a chill pill. I am getting way too highly strung for absolutely no reason. Chris is nothing to me. He's just a guy.

‘Okay, Des, answer me this. Did he specifically tell you he would call you today?'

Well, not exactly, but he did call me five minutes after I left Katerina's. He was eager then, but now he seems to have lost interest.

‘Did he tell you he would call you at a specific time?'

Well, obviously not.

‘Here's a little secret about guys, Des. We don't watch the clock, we don't obsess and we will call when we call. We're not playing mind games – we're just guys.'

That's a big help. So I drove myself crazy and came to work when I didn't have to – all for nothing. I should have at least thought to go to Michael's shop. He would have fed me while I had my mini meltdown.

‘He called you last night. He will call you, and you'll make some stupid small talk cause you have no idea what you will actually say when he calls, and he'll ask you out, and you'll obsess for a whole day about what you'll wear, call Ricki in a mad panic cause she knows your wardrobe better than you and you'll lie to your mother about where you're going.'

Am I really that predictable? On that note, I think I'll go back to my paperwork. Time to relocate to the kitchen. I smell a fresh pot of coffee brewing.

‘Thanks, Michael. You have a knack for making me realise how crazy I really am.'

‘No problem, my dear. Don't worry – he'll call.'

I can't believe that it's Sunday night and I'm at work when I don't have to be. This is scary. Am I becoming conscientious or something? I've taken my paperwork into the kitchen but I can't focus anymore. At least the assessments are done and Adrian won't be threatening me with morning shifts for the rest of my life. I've got to get out of here.

My manic thoughts are interrupted by the ring of my mobile phone. I wonder if it's him. What do I say? I guess I really should answer the phone. Quick glance at the display on my mobile confirms it's him. About bloody time.

‘Hello.' Cool, calm, collected, only a touch of boredom indicated in the voice. Perfect.

‘Hi Desi.' Now should I play coy and pretend that I don't know who he is? Make him sweat like he has made me sweat all day? Yeah, I should make him sweat bullets.

‘Hi Chris.' God I'm weak. Pathetic. ‘How are you?' All of a sudden I have no idea what to say. I know he can't see me but I bet he can feel me blushing. What is happening to me? This total loss of control is not a feeling I like.

‘I'm good. How are you doing?' He sounds as awkward as I feel. Funnily enough that makes me feel better.

‘I'm okay.' I feel like I am fifteen years old and have just been passed a note at school telling me that a guy likes me. How I wish my stomach would settle down. My voice is squeaking. I'm in trouble. ‘What's happening?' Haven't we covered that? Four years of university and the best I can come up with is that? Our education system has a lot to answer for.

‘Desi, are you as nervous as I am here?' I can play with this. I can be cool, calm and collected and pretend that this has no effect on me whatsoever. No way should I let him know that this whole thing has turned me into a nervous wreck. No way should I give him the upper hand, considering that he has just handed it to me on a silver platter.

‘Yeah, I guess I am.' Okay, I've officially taken leave of my senses. Chris is laughing. Why is he laughing?

‘What's so funny?' I have to ask.

‘I've been staring at my phone all day. Wanting to call you but I had no idea what to say. I thought I was going to go insane.'

Yippee! I still have the upper hand. I am still in control of the situation. Desi is back on top. ‘So what made you finally decide to call?' Oh, I can't wait to hear the answer to this.

‘I want to see you again. I want to get to know you better.' He wants to see me again? I want to do a cartwheel here and now. If someone hadn't just walked into the kitchen I'd be doing a celebratory dance of joy right now. He wants to see me again. I've got to call Ricki. I've got to debrief with her. ‘Desi, are you there?' Whoops, must have gotten lost in my thoughts.

‘Sorry, Chris, someone just walked into the tea room.'

‘Are you at work? On a Sunday?'

‘I thought I'd come in and finish off some paperwork.'

No need to tell him that the reason I was so far behind in my work was that waiting for him to call had driven me to complete and utter distraction. ‘It's nice and quiet here on Sunday nights.' He's got music playing in the background. I know the music. I listen to it myself sometimes. ‘Have you got the Phantom of the Opera playing in the background?'

‘Um … yeah. It can be very soothing and um … '

He's embarrassed about having a musical playing in the background. How cute!

‘I'll turn it down.'

‘No.' I think I said that a bit too eagerly. ‘Don't turn it off. I listen to the soundtrack at home, too. Everyone thinks I'm nuts, but I love it.' This is better, real conversation. ‘I fell in love with it when I was seventeen and went to see it with my drama class.' Okay, so Violet, one of my team members, is about to choke on her dinner. She shouldn't be listening to my conversation anyway. It is irrelevant that we are in the kitchen and it is public domain.

‘Desi, I'm no good at this phone thing. Do you want to get together for dinner tomorrow night? Talk in person?' He's asked me out. Tomorrow. Shit. I don't finish work till eight. Shit, how am I going to do this? I don't want to say no. Brain wave. God I'm good. Adrian owes me three hours for overtime and I haven't taken them yet. That's it. I'll create some family emergency and leave early.

‘That sounds like a good idea.' Give me details, Chris. Please don't make me ask for them.

‘How about I pick you up around seven?'

He wants to pick me up? That's a no-no. Guys do not come to my house on a first date. Denny didn't come anywhere near my house for six months. And even then, he never made it into the house. He got as far as sitting in his car to pick me up.

‘How about I just meet you there. It's easier.' I could use work as an excuse, travel time. Anything is better than him coming to my place.

‘Desi, I like to do things properly. When I take a lady out, it's door-to-door service.' Is he sure he's Greek? He doesn't sound like most of the Greek guys I know. ‘I'll pick you up from home and drop you off there, not around the corner, not at a park nearby, not at a coffee shop. We're a bit too old for that shit, aren't we?' He can't be Greek. He's a gentleman masquerading as a Greek. But I barely know him. How can I tell him where I live? He might turn out to be psychotic or obsessive or anything.

‘As long as you don't come inside and have a deep and meaningful with my folks about their veggie garden. Buzz my mobile when you get there and I'll come out.'

I'm allowed to put conditions on it. I'm Desi. ‘And don't honk the horn like a wog.' We're both laughing.

‘Are you worried about what your parents will say?'

‘Nah. I just can't be bothered going through the Spanish Inquisition with them. You know, who is he? What part of Greece is he from? What does he do? How old is he? Where does he live? What do his parents do? What church does he go to? So unless you want to email me your life history in twenty five words or less, we'll do it my way.' At least he sees the funny side of this. But if Chris were to come to my door there would be no end to the questions that I would have to answer. No way would I intentionally put myself through that torture. No way is my family getting their hooks into Chris before I do.

‘Okay, we'll do this your way. This time.' Why does that sound like a warning? Like this is just the beginning? ‘I'll call you tomorrow to get your details.' Thank God he didn't ask me for my address here and now, because at the moment I am struggling to remember what my name is let alone anything else.

‘Okay. Chris, I better get back to my paperwork.' And a good message to email to Adrian so that he can let me leave work at five instead of eight. No way am I cancelling tomorrow night. No way. I better come up with something good.

‘I'll talk to you tomorrow.' Silence. I am beginning to hate silence.

‘Desi?'

‘Yes, Chris?' God, he has such a sexy voice.

‘I'm really looking forward to tomorrow night.'

My stomach is on spin cycle. ‘Me, too. I better go. See you tomorrow, Chris.'

‘Bye Des.'

Suddenly the line is dead and I'm staring at my phone with what must look like the biggest, cheesiest grin ever. Violet is looking at me like I am from another planet. Working in a relatively small call centre, we all get to know quite a bit about each other and I think I have just confirmed Violet's suspicions: her team leader is nuts. An absolute lunatic.

‘Violet, if you ever tell anyone about this I'll have you on ten o'clock starts for three months.' She knows I'm joking. I hope. I don't care. I'm going out with Chris tomorrow night. Maybe I should have listened to Katerina sooner!

‘You know, Des, if you put half as much effort into your work that you put into your scams, I'd be scared for my job.'

Ha ha, he's so funny. I have absolutely no desire to manage a centre full of lunatics. A team is sufficient.

So here I am, semi-naked and hyperventilating. It would help if I knew where I was going tonight, but no, that would make too much sense. Chris called earlier to get my address but he wouldn't tell me where he is taking me. All I know is we're having dinner.

It's already six o'clock. Only an hour left to solve my issues and get ready. I need my saviour, the one and only person who can help me get a grip on reality. I pick up the cordless phone and hit speed dial.

‘Hello?' She must have just gotten in the door cause she sounds a bit breathless.

‘Ricki, I need help desperately.' I hear her drop everything that she is carrying.

‘What's wrong, Des?' She's alarmed; I know I'm being a tad melodramatic but I can't help it.

‘I've got no idea what to wear!' I'm wailing like a child. What is happening to me?

‘Des, calm down. Breathe in, breathe out. Where is he taking you?'

‘I don't know. All he said is dinner. So now I have no idea what to wear and I have been standing in front of my wardrobe half naked for the last half hour.' I need Ricki to think for me now, because I sure as hell can't.

Besides, she knows my wardrobe just as well as I do.

Shit, call waiting beeps. I hate modern technology. ‘Rick, keep thinking, I'll be back to you in a sec.' Switch callers. ‘Hello?' Who the hell is inconsiderate enough to call me in during my time of agony?

‘Despina, my love.' Oh, shit, it's Thia Maria. Must exorcise all demons and evil forces. I want no bad karma surrounding tonight.

‘How are you, Thia?' Go away you stupid old bag. You are sending out evil vibes my way. I can feel it. ‘Mum's not here. I'll get her to call you back.' I'm so good I cut her off before she tries chatting with me. I am such a liar. Mum is downstairs in the kitchen with Effie's kids, but my dilemma is much more important that–her proxy efforts anyway.

‘I'm back, Rick. You're the brain of this combination. Any suggestions?' Please, please, please. I'm desperate.

‘Black pants.' Why is it so simple when she says it? What is it about this whole situation that has rendered me incapable of making even the simplest decision? ‘No matter where you go, you won't be over or under dressed.' That's half the problem solved. What about the top? Another dilemma.

‘Wear the purple halter top with the long sleeves.'

‘Halter on the first date? I don't know, Rick.'

‘It'll look fantastic. It makes your boobs look really good.'

I can deal with that, emphasising my good points. Have to admit, I have good boobs.

‘You reckon?'

‘Trust me, Des.' I do trust her, with my life. ‘You really like this guy don't you?'

Get real. ‘Relax, Ricki. I don't even know him. I'm just going out with him to get to know him.'

‘Bullshit, you're in lust. Aren't you spewing you fought Katerina for so long?' Ricki and I spent a good two hours on the phone last night dissecting every aspect of the barbecue and the two subsequent phone calls.

‘Shut up.' When an intelligent remark eludes me, it's best to go with an insult or two. ‘I don't even know the guy. With my luck he's a sociopathic psycho and a sexual deviate all in one, and I'll end up regretting this.'

I hope not.

‘Des, not all guys are like Denny.'