Authors: Marin Thomas
Blushing, she changed the subject. “Why couldn't Mrs. Sneed get the boys?”
“She said she doesn't answer the phone when her game shows are on.”
“Great.” Isi's shoulders sagged, as if she carried the weight of the world on them. The urge to hug her was strong, but he doubted his sympathy would be welcome.
“Did the boys tell you what the fight was about?” she asked.
“Santa Claus.”
“What?”
He patted the step and she sat next to him. The faint scent of her perfume triggered an image of her naked body in his mind. He shifted on the step, hoping to hide his growing arousal. Making love to Isi had released two years of pent-up desire for her and reining it back in was damn near impossible.
“What about Santa Claus?” she asked.
“A kid at school said there wasn't a Santa Claus and that moms and dads bought the toys.”
Isi blinked hard.
He grasped her handânot to offer comfort but because he had to touch herâhe'd missed that intimate connection with her.
“They figured it out, didn't they?” she whispered.
“Figured what out?”
“That they get one gift at Christmas, because I don't make enough money to buy more.”
“The boys have plenty of toys.” He gestured to the box by the shed.
“But they're second-hand toys. Cast-offs from other kids.”
He snuggled her against his side. This felt so rightâhim and Isi. Why couldn't he find the courage to take a leap of faith and commit to her? “You're doing the best you can for the boys. When they grow up and understand the sacrifices you've made, they'll love you even more.”
“Or they'll resent me for making bad choices.”
“What bad choices?”
“I made the decision to come to America with nothing but a suitcase full of clothes. Then I slept with a married man and got pregnant.”
“Cut yourself some slack, Isi. You were vulnerable and scared.”
“Stop being nice. I was stupid to believe Tyler really cared for me.”
Conway wasn't used to doling out adviceâhe was used to seeking Isi's counsel. “I think you'll be happy when you hear the reason the boys got into a fight today.”
“You don't have to protect them,” she said.
“I'm not. Javier shoved Rico because Rico pushed Katie to the ground after she told everyone at recess that there was no Santa Claus.”
Isi smiled. “Javier stood up for Katie?”
“Yep. And when Rico shoved Javi back, Miguel stepped in and shoved Rico hard enough that the kid fell down and the recess monitor saw them.”
“I'm proud of Javi for trying to protect Katie,” Isi said.
“And I'm the one who told Miguel that he should always have his brother's back on the playground.”
She shook her head. “So you encouraged the boys to fight rather than talk out their disagreements with other kids?”
“Kids this age don't talk, Isi. Besides, fighting was the only way I knew how to defend myself when I was in school.”
“What do you mean?”
“My grandpa never taught me how to handle the ribbing I got because of my name. Johnny was the one who looked out for us.”
“Johnny taught you to fight?”
“He didn't exactly teach me. I picked it up from watching him defend my brothers against bullies.”
“You never told me you were teased.”
“With a name like Conway Twitty Cash I've had my share of fights. Though I count myself lucky I wasn't the one named Merle. It's no wonder my brother goes by Mack.”
“Why in the world did your mother name you all after country and western singers?”
“Grandma claimed that when our mom was a teenager, she'd lock herself in her bedroom and listen to the music of all the country-western greats.”
“She must have known saddling you with those old-fashioned names would cause trouble.”
“Our mom was never there when one of us came home from school with a black eye.” And when his mother had been at the farm, she hadn't asked her children about their friends or problems they were having in school.
“Defending my name with my fists became second nature. My brothers and I were all suspended from school for fighting at least once. Johnny spent the most time in the principal's office, because he fought our battles for us until we became old enough to hold our own.”
“Do people still mock your name?”
“Once in a while, but now I disarm the big-boy bullies with my smile and charm.” He sobered. “I'm sorry if I overstepped my bounds, but the twins need to learn to stand up for themselves. If they don't, the bullying might snowball until one of them really gets hurt.”
“I'll talk to the supervisor at the school and figure out where we go from here.” She motioned to his truck. “I don't want to keep you any longer.”
“I'm not in any hurry to leave.” There was nothing waiting for him at the farm except an orchard full of nut trees.
She smiled. “I landed a job interview.”
“When?”
“Next Thursday after my final exam. A stationery store in Yuma needs an office manager.”
“Manager? That sounds impressive.”
“Not really. I'd be sitting in a back room on the computer all day, but the position comes with benefits.”
“Will Mrs. Sneed watch the boys while you go to the interview?”
“She's supposed to. The interview is at four-thirty then afterward, I have to work at the bar until midnight.”
“I hope the interview goes well.”
“Thanks. This could be a new beginning for me and the boys.”
Conway forced a smile, but the future appeared anything but promisingâat least for him. Isi would nail the job interview. She'd quit waitressing for Red. He'd no longer drop by the bar, because she wouldn't be there to talk to. And their friendship would fade into a fond memory.
Exactly what you want, right?
“I better get going,” he said.
Isi walked him to his truck. “Thank you for being there for the boys.”
He
had
been there for the boys, hadn't he? “Keep me as an emergency contact.”
“You sure?”
“Positive.” He toyed with his keys. “Maybe I could take the boys next Thursday, while you're at school and the interview. We could do guy stuff at the farm.” Conway expected Isi to jump at the offerâher hesitation felt like a punch in the gut.
“I don't know if that's a good idea, Conway. They took it pretty hard when I told them you wouldn't be babysitting anymore.”
He understood Isi's concern. He'd hurt the boys when he'd backed away, but he wasn't ready to say goodbyeânot yet. “I'd like to make it up to them.”
“I suppose the boys can skip school that day. Their class Christmas party is on Monday then most of the kids will be no-shows the rest of the week, because their parents are on vacation.”
“What time should I pick them up?”
“Nine-thirty would be great then I can get to school early and study before my test.”
“See you at nine-thirty.” Conway hopped into his truck and drove off. When he adjusted his side mirror and saw Isi standing by the carport, a sharp pain struck his chest.
Leaving her didn't feel right.
* * *
“W
HAT
'
S
C
ONWAY
GONNA
do with us, Mom?” Javier asked as Isi tied his shoes.
“I'm not sure, honey.” The second Thursday in December had arrived and she'd almost phoned Conway and canceled his plans with the boys. She was torn between wanting them to have this last memory with their favorite sitter and wanting to protect them from feeling abandoned when Conway didn't come by again after today.
And she admitted she was being selfishâshe wanted to see Conway one more time, too.
“How come you're not going with us?” Miguel asked.
“My final exam is this afternoon.”
“Are you gonna get an A?” Javier asked.
“I hope so.” Isi had lectured the boys until she was blue in the face about the importance of getting a good education, and she had proudly shared her grades with themâAs, Bs and the few Cs she'd earned.
“Conway's here!” Miguel shouted from his post at the front window. He raced outside, Javier following him.
Isi ducked into the bathroom to touch up her makeup and hair. She wore black dress pants and a silky blouse with a blazer for her interview after class. She'd secured her hair in a clip on top of her head, the style making her appear older and more confident than she felt. When she emerged from the bathroom, Conway stood in the living room answering a barrage of questions from the boys.
“Where are we going?” Javier asked.
Miguel tugged on Conway's pant leg. “Can we drive the tractor?”
“Stop harassing Conway.” Isi smiled.
Conway did a double-take when he saw her. “Wow. You look nice.”
“Thanks. I won't have time to change clothes before the interview, so I'm stuck wearing this to school.”
“Good luck with the test and the interview,” he said.
She gathered her backpack and purse. “Be good for Conway and use your manners.” She hugged the boys.
Conway grinned. “Don't I get one?”
“I suppose.” Playing along, she stood on tiptoe and hugged Conway only he turned his head toward her and their lips bumped. She stepped back quickly but the boys caught the kiss.
“Hey, I want a kiss,” Javier said.
“Me, too.” Miguel stuck out his face.
Isi made a big production out of kissing the boys' cheeks then beat a hasty retreat, closing the door behind her.
“We have a lot to do,” Conway said.
“You got lipstick on your face.” Miguel smiled.
He rubbed his fingers over the sticky gloss on his mouth. “Is it gone?”
Javier nodded then said, “Is mine gone?” He rubbed his cheek.
“Yep. Now, here's the plan. We're throwing a graduation party for your mom.”
The boys' eyes rounded. “What's a graduation party?” Miguel asked.
“It's a party to celebrate when a person finishes high school or college.”
Javier clapped his hands. “I like parties.”
“I talked to Red, and he said we can have the party at the bar. When your mom goes to work after her job interview, we'll all be there to surprise her. First, we need to shop for decorations.”
“Do we gotta get a cake, too?” Miguel asked.
“Good thinking. We'll stop at the grocery store and pick one out.”
“She likes flowers on cakes,” Javier said then in the same breath asked, “Does she get presents?”
Conway hadn't thought about gifts. “Do you want to buy your mom a gift?”
Both boys shouted, “Yes!”
“What should we buy her?” Conway asked.
“A new vacuum,” Javier said.
“She yells at ours 'cause it doesn't work,” Miguel said.
A vacuum wasn't an exciting graduation gift. “We'll see.” Maybe he'd think of the perfect present while they were shopping. “Get your jackets. We've got lots of errands to run before the big party.”
Chapter Thirteen
Isi sat across from Mr. Buford's desk in a windowless room at the back of Buford's Stationery and Office Supply and waited patiently for him to read her résumé.
“The school courses you've taken are impressive.” He set the paper aside. “But you have no work experience in an office environment.”
“No, sir, I don't.”
“And your current employer is the Border Town Bar & Grill.”
“I waitress there at night. Taking classes during the day didn't leave me with many options for evening jobs that paid well.”
“I don't know if you intend to keep your waitressing position on the weekends, but all of my employees work at least one Saturday a month.”
“I plan to quit my current job and I'd make child-care arrangements for any Saturday I'm scheduled to work.”
Mr. Buford's gaze shifted to her left hand. “Are you married, Ms. Lopez?”
Isi swallowed a sigh. Why had she brought up the boys? “No, sir.”
“I was raised by a single mother.”
His confession released the tension from Isi's body.
“Making ends meet was a daily struggle for her,” he said.
“The difficult times are worth it. I wouldn't trade my life for the world. Everything I do is for my sons.”
“Sons?”
She smiled. “Twin four-year-olds.”
“What do you do with the boys when you're in school or working at the bar?”
This wasn't a typical interview. She worried Mr. Buford was judging her character and not her job skills. “The boys are in preschool during the afternoon and a neighbor watches them until I get home from the bar.”
“No family?”
She shook her head.
“My mother was all alone, too.” His attention shifted to the wall across the room. “I was a latch-key kid.”
Isi wasn't sure what to say.
“I'm willing to hire you on a trial basisâthree months. After that time, I'll evaluate your job performance and if all goes well, I'll make you a permanent employee and you'll be eligible for benefits.”
Relief made Isi light-headed. “That sounds more than fair. What hours will I be working?”
“I'm going to leave that up to you. The store hours are Monday through Saturday eight to six. As long as you handle your responsibilities, you're free to work with your sons' schedules.”
Isi reminded herself to be firm and confident when she stated her salary requirements. “I'd need at least twelve dollars an hour.”
“I'll start you at fourteen dollars and if you stay on after three months, I'll pay you sixteen.”
Never in her wildest dreams had she believed she'd make sixteen dollars an hour.
“I give all my employees a Christmas bonus and the amount depends on the total store sales for the year.” He smiled. “Incentive for everyone to work hard.”
For the first time in years an exciting future awaited her. All her sacrifices might finally pay off.
“You'll begin January second.” Mr. Buford scribbled on a piece of paper and handed it to Isi. “My office phone number if you need to get in touch with me or leave a message.”
“Thank you for this opportunity, Mr. Buford.” She shook his hand. “You won't be sorry you hired me.”
“It's a pleasure to have you as part of our team, Ms. Lopez.”
As soon as Isi left the stationery store, she whooped for joy, but her excitement fizzled as she drove to work. Her life was taking a turn for the better, but this new path didn't include Conway. When she arrived at the bar, she noticed only a few cars parked in the lot, which was unusual for this time of day.
She grabbed her purse and Border Town Bar & Grill T-shirt then walked to the entrance, where she found the front door locked. Had Red scheduled an employee meeting that she'd forgotten about? She went behind the building and entered through the back door. The kitchen was dark.
“Anybody in here?” She pushed through the swinging door to the barroom.
“Surprise!”
Isi jumped inside her skin.
The lights popped on, and she gaped in shock at her coworkers who blew paper horns and threw streamers and confetti into the air. Then she spotted Conway and her sons standing in front of a banner that read Congratulations Graduate! Her eyes flooded with tears.
“Yeah, Mom!” Miguel yelled. Javier mimicked his brother and the rest of the room echoed “congratulations,” “good job” and “way to go, Isi.”
“I don't know what to say.” She wiped at her tears.
“A toast to the new graduate.” Conway raised his beer bottle and several cheers followed.
She smiled through her tears. “No one's ever thrown me a party.”
More horns blew. Sasha fed quarters into the jukebox and Red waved her over to see her cake.
“The boys picked it out.” Conway chuckled. “They asked the lady in the bakery to put lots of flowers on it.”
Isi hugged her sons then Conway. “Thank you. This is turning out to be a great day.” She smiled. “I got the job.”
“That's awesome, Isi.” Conway whistled and a hush fell over the bar. “Hey, everyone, listen up. Isi nailed the job interview and they hired her!”
More cheers and congratulations.
“We got you a present, Mom.” Javier handed her a small jeweler's box.
Isi glanced at Conway, wondering if...
Don't be stupid
.
It's not an engagement ring
.
She held her breath as she lifted the lid on the velvet case. A silver necklace with a star pendant. The air in her lungs leaked out and she widened her smile to hide her disappointment.
“It's beautiful, boys.”
“Conway said if you wear it, you can reach the stars,” Javier said.
“And the necklace will remind your mom that dreams only come true if you never stop dreaming.”
Isi swallowed the lump in her throat. She couldn't very well tell Conway that the star wouldn't work, because her dream-come-true stood right in front of her yet remained out of reach.
“The necklace is lovely.” The star would always remind her of what she yearned for but could never have. “Let's dance.” She twirled the boys and others in the crowd joined them.
Time passed in a blur. Before Isi knew it seven o'clock had rolled around and Red opened the bar to the public after he'd told her to take the night off. She thanked her coworkers for coming to her graduation party and Conway carried the leftover cake to the car for her then retrieved the boys' booster seats from his truck.
“I think we surprised your mom tonight, didn't we, guys?”
“Were you surprised, Mom?” Javier asked.
“I was. This has been the best night ever.”
Conway leaned his head inside the car after the boys crawled into their seats. “Be good for your mom.”
“Are you gonna come to our house tomorrow?” Miguel asked.
“No, buddy. Now that your mom is finished with school, I won't be hanging out with you guys any longer. Don't worry, though, we'll see each from time to time.”
It occurred to Isi that this was her and Conway's final goodbye.
Conway stepped away from the car but didn't make eye contact with her. “Put your belts on, guys.” Isi shut the door, cutting off their protests.
“Thank you, Conway. I couldn't have made it through these past couple of months without your help.”
Without you
.
“I enjoyed hanging out with the boys.”
“Good luck finding âthe one.'” She forced a smile. “I'll miss hearing about your trials and tribulations.”
“I'll stop by the stationery store and keep you updated.”
“Don't you dare.” She laughed. “I don't want to lose my job.” Keeping her smile in place she said, “When you do find âthe one,' it would be nice to know who she is.”
“You'll be the first person I tell.”
Isi couldn't stand it any longer. She hugged Conway hard then walked to the driver's side of the car.
“Isi?”
“What?”
“Take care of yourself and the boys.”
“I will.” She slid behind the wheel and drove off grateful their goodbye had been short. Tonight after she put the boys to bed and it sunk in that she'd not only lost the man she'd fallen in love with but also a good friend, she'd cry her eyes out.
* * *
“H
OW
COME
WE
gotta stay with Mrs. Sneed if you don't have to go to school?” Javier stood in the bathroom doorway Monday morning, watching Isi put on her makeup.
“Because you're on Christmas break and your school is closed this week.” Red had switched Isi to the day shift at the bar and she planned to use her lunch hour to shop for Christmas toys.
“I don't want to go to Mrs. Sneed's, either.” Miguel joined his brother in the doorway.
“She said she'd bake cookies with you.”
“I don't like cookies.” Miguel's petulant expression tested Isi's patience.
“Cheer up. Christmas Eve is three days away. Aren't you excited?”
“No.” Miguel stomped off.
“What's wrong with Mig, Javi?”
“He's sad.”
“Why?”
“'Cause Conway's gone.”
The boys had already forgotten and forgiven Conway after he'd turned down their invitation to be their dad. She wished she could rebound so quickly from life's disappointments. “You two had a lot of fun with Conway, but he's got his own life to live and...”
He doesn't want us to be a part of it
. “We have our lives to live.”
“Mom.”
“What, Javi?”
“Can I change my Christmas wish list?”
She stopped applying her lipstick. “We already mailed your letter to Santa.”
“I don't want a black Furby.”
Good thing she hadn't bought the toy yet. “What do you want?”
“I want Conway to come back.”
She finished putting on her lipstick then knelt in front of her son. “Conway can't watch you anymore.”
Javier leaned against her and she hugged him. If there truly was a Santa Claus, then she'd have put Conway on her wish list, too. Javier touched the star pendant she wore. “Can we wish for Santa to bring Conway back?”
“I'm afraid Santa only delivers toys to children, not wishes.”
“Conway said if we wished hard enough our wishes will come true,” he said.
Isi wasn't a big fan of wish-making. After her father had disappeared, her mother had told her that if she wished hard enough for his return, one day he would come home. All those years of wishing had been for nothing. “Go play with Miguel. I'll walk you over to Mrs. Sneed's in a minute.”
After Javier left the bathroom, she closed her eyes and willed the tears not to fall. How long would it be, before her and the boys' hearts finally let go of Conway?
* * *
“W
HO
DIED
?”
Conway shifted his gaze to the barn doorway where his brother Johnny stood.
“No one died. Why?”
“You don't normally grimace like that.” Johnny walked farther into the barn and stopped next to the tractor. “What are you doing?”
“Testing the fluids.”
“Did Dixie tell you that we're all gathering at the Triple D for Christmas this year?”
“Nope.” His sister had left him a voicemail message last night, but he hadn't listened to it, because he hadn't been in the mood to talk to anyone.
“Shannon's brothers will be there and Clive's bringing Fiona Wilson.”
“Your father-in-law is still dating the town spinster?”
“He doesn't talk about her and I don't ask questions.” Johnny picked up a wrench from the toolbox and examined it.
“Shouldn't you be out punching cows or training horses?” Conway asked.
“I needed a break.”
“Trouble in paradise?”
“Shannon's been cranky lately.”
“Why?”
“I don't have any idea. When I mention her mood, she bites my head off.”
Before he met Isi, Conway had believed himself an expert on women. Now, he didn't have a clue.
“Speaking of women, why aren't you watching Isi's boys?”
“She graduated from the community college and starts a new job next month.” For a man who'd been dead set against having kids, not an hour in the day passed by when Javier and Miguel didn't cross his mind. The boys had weaseled their way into his heart and the thought of never hanging out with them again left a hollow feeling in his chest.
“Good for Isi,” Johnny said. “I hope things work out for her.”
So did Conway.
Johnny turned to leave then stopped. “I almost forgot to tell you. Dixie and Gavin bought a house in Yuma. The closing is in January and she wants our help moving.”
“I'll be here.” Where else did he have to go? After Johnny left, Conway sat in the barn a while longer and reflected on his life. He'd taken over the farm, and with the added responsibility he'd discovered that he enjoyed being the caretaker of his grandfather's orchards. This year's harvest had been a lot of work, but the bond he'd developed with the land fulfilled him in a way nothing else hadânot even rodeo. He thought he'd miss riding the circuit, but the time he'd spent on the farm with Javier and Miguel had been his best days.
Maybe he should resume his mission to find “the one.” He waited for the rush of adrenaline that usually hit him when he made plans to prowl the honky tonks, but the blood pumping through his veins felt sluggish.
Calling it quits for the day he returned to the bunkhouse to shower and change. He decided to drive into town and shop. He didn't exchange holiday gifts with his siblings, but he wanted to buy a toy for his nephew's first Christmas.
An image of Javier and Miguel flashed through Conway's mind. The boys were the perfect age to enjoy Christmas. They still believed in Santa Claus and he envisioned them tearing the wrapping paper from their gifts with lightning speed.