Heart Song (33 page)

I smiled. “Yes. Yes we did.”

The rest of the night was spent dancing, eating, and having fun. Marren sat with me while we watched all of the rhythmic dances that circled the fire, not moving until only bright red coals wer
e noticeable. The loud, roaring
commotion had dulled out to a quiet hum as the night grew late and many of the guests left. A bucket of water was poured over the coals, dousing them with a loud hiss and plume of smoke that headed straight for me.

“Uh-oh,” one of the dancers had commented.

“What?” I asked full of alarm.

“You know what that means...” It was a statement more than a question.

I looked at Marren, who chuckled to himself then said, “When smoke travels to a pregnant woman, no matter what the reason, she'll have an easy birth and it will happen on a full moon.”

“Well it isn't going to be
this
full moon. It's too early still,” I argued.

“It isn't really specific.” It was Okelo who walked up to us with Serid on her hips.

“It is so amazing how much this boy grows when you are not looking,” I said.

“I know. Soon we'll be going through his rite.” As she spoke the words, a flash of sadness crossed her eyes. I knew she was thinking about her lost love. I almost felt guilty for having saved mine, but she never seemed to mind and was thrilled to have been in charge of arranging our ceremony. She shook the sadness from her eyes and said, “At least we now know of a time.
Helps us to prepare for the big event!”

“But I thought you said it wasn't specific?”

“Well, you aren't going for longer than another month! Otherwise, you'd be carrying for too long,” Okelo said.  I gulped. She smiled with a slight bow of her head. “My master and lady, I bid thee a good evening.”

“Thank you, Okelo,” Marren spoke. He sounded at peace, and for once, Jiren wasn't on his mind.

Once she left, I looked at Marren and dropped my eyes down to our hands. “How do we get these off?”

“I take them off...with my teeth.”

I couldn't help the giggle that escaped me. He chuckled along with me.
Our hearts dancing to the song of our joy.
On that night, there
was
only us, together, with no one else on our minds but each other.

***

The next month wasn’t spent in peaceful splendor. Marren made extra effort to keep
himself
busy, but he continued to use our private way of communicating. He was on edge about everything. Jiren hadn't made an appearance yet and that made it worse. I tried to comfort him as best I could, but he wouldn't stop worrying about the baby. Nor would he tell me why.

All of the races had come together to form groups of Watchmen to actively patrol parts of the immortal realm in search of any sign of Jiren or his whereabouts. The mountain village was well guarded, especially my room. And I was never alone.

Okelo had spent every waking moment with me, along with Serid, who had grown to the size of a toddler. He spoke in full sentences in common and his native
language,
and he was pretend fighting Enid in my room with wooden
swords. Enid was on his knees with one hand behind his back, gripping his belt. The giggles that emerged from that small child could shake Jiren from his seat. Not that I would want to find out. The kid just had that kind of power.

It was nice to watch the playfulness of the two, especially since being confined to my bed for the previous week. Horrid cramps, that would give changing a run for the money, would rip through my stomach and last for what seemed like hours when only minutes passed. And the baby had grown to a point where anytime it moved, it would hurt. Okelo insisted that I remain in bed for the remainder of the pregnancy. I was getting too close. But, the next full moon wasn't for another two days, which I took every chance to remind Okelo of.

“That was only a saying, you can very well have your child in the next day,” she would always say. And this time was no different. “Besides,” she added as an afterthought, “The baby's movements have slowed. That is a sure sign of birth.”

I tried to ignore the way that anticipating the amount of pain that I was going to go through made my body react. Like being constricted in tightly bound rope or being held under water with no hope of air.

Enid, having lost his battle against the Great Serid, approached to give me whatever news he could. He had been bombarded by Serid the moment he walked through the door and begged for a practice fight before he talked to me. “How are you feeling?” His eyes were filled with the concern of a father.

“I'm well, Athair. How are things in the outside world?” The outside world was everything outside the door to my room.

“They found evidence of tracks just on the northern side of the
dwarves
territory. No one knows if they belong to Jiren or his followers.”

“If he has any left. I hear they're coming in at a slow trickle, if they make it alive.”

“It is true that Jiren's followers seem to be dwindling. As word of what you and Marren have proved to the rest of the Ancients travels through the remaining territories, more and more have decided to leave his lead. Though, none have been helpful in revealing the details of his plans.”

I tried to pay attention to what Enid was discussing with me through the tapping of a wooden sword against the stone of the open window. I kept thinking that something was on the verge of my thoughts, inching closer with every tap. Okelo snapped something in the native language and stomped over to scold Serid, who looked like he had just lost his favorite toy in the world.

Okelo scooped him up into her arms and then turned towards me with a smile. “I'm taking Serid to our room. I will return when he's asleep to check on you again.”

I nodded and watched as she stomped with frustration out of the room. “Something is bothering her. Marren too, but they're not telling me. Do you know, Enid?” I looked deep into his blue eyes. He sighed, walking away from the side of my bed.

“I'm afraid I do not, A'lainn.”

I raised an eyebrow to his back. “I will find out eventually. I'm just concerned. He's been so wound up the last couple of days. He's barely said anything to me, and although I understand the ways of his people, I still don't know why he won’t at least peek in on me.”

“I wish I could tell you, but even I don't know.”

I felt compelled to stretch, reaching my arms way above my head and curving my back just slightly. Instead of it feeling great, it felt as though a sword sliced through my stomach. I let out a howling scream, falling back against the bed and clawing the pillow in my tightened fists. The baby moved within me, sending another sharp slice. I
laid
there, writhing in pain, while Enid shouted something about getting help and disappearing into the hall.

I felt one last slice of fire burn through my abdomen, followed by a huge warm gush of liquid pouring from in between my legs. It soaked the bedding and my gown, forcing them to stick to my legs. I reached down to feel what it was, only to bring my fingers up and see blood.

Marren! The baby!
I tried to put as much desperation into my unspoken words as I could. Within the time it took me to endure another agonizing cramp, he was at my feet, pulling the blankets from my legs and lifting the bottom of my gown up over my bent knees.

His eyes never touched mine. He kept them on everything but my eyes. I felt scared and unsure of what was happening. “Push,” he told me with a sense of urgency.

I inhaled a deep breath and pushed with all my might, grunting through the burning pain.

“Again.”

I pushed again, this time feeling like I was being torn from the inside out. A dark rim lined my vision, causing everything to blur.

“Relena?”
Marren called out, but it sounded as though he was on the other side of a cavern—much further away than just in front of me. Then, just before the blackness took over my vision completely, I saw his blurred mouth move. But no sound came out.

***

I felt like I was in a dream.
Weightless and floating in a black sea.
I could hear things in the distance. Things that I couldn't make out completely but they were shouts of people. One voice stuck out to me. It was Marren. His voice
,
I heard the most. Shouting things I couldn't understand. He sounded pained?
Angry?
I couldn't tell. His voice was so far in the distance.

I wanted to get closer to him. I needed to comfort him. To help him with what he needed.

What was making him so upset?

Something tugged at my memory, begging me to remember. Something that seemed like I should remember and know, but couldn't.
Something important.

“She's dying!” A loud voice echoed through my darkness.

It caused my heart to palpitate. “Who's dying?” I asked.

No response.

“No!” Marren's voice echoed all around me.

I knew then I had to remember. I had to find out what I’d forgotten. I had to find my way back to Marren.

A pain seared through me, on the lower end of my abdomen. I placed my hand over the opened wound and held it up to my eyes.
Blood.
It was a familiar sight, and despite the lack of light I could see myself so clearly. So many times I had been graced with the sight of my own blood. So much of it had been spilled over my years. If it weren't for Danst...Wait. Danst...Danst is…dead.

That realization sparked a small light in front of me.
A tiny flame that flickered and moved within the shadows.
I remembered Danst had died helping fight off Jiren's forces. Something else played out in my mind. The night he yelled at me.
The night before he died.

“I hate to break this to you but Jiren can't be killed in the way you are thinking.”

“Oh yeah?
How can I kill him then?” I asked, stepping up to Danst and looking deep into his eyes and waiting for him to answer. He avoided my gaze and turned to walk away. “Don't walk away from me, tell me!”

“I can't.”

“You can't or you won't?” I shouted.

He turned around faster than I’d seen him move before with rage blazing brightly in his eyes. “Pick one, Relena! You'll stop at nothing and run over even your mate to get to Jiren and kill him. You won't think!
At least about anyone but yourself.
Go do yourself a favor and get some rest. And try not to get yourself and your baby killed.”

Baby...? That was it. I was giving birth when something happened...

The flame burned brighter and was getting larger. So much so that I could tell that instead of a flame flickering in the shadows, it was a window.
A window of light with flickering shadows and movement of people rushing beyond and around me.
The murmur of the voices blended together to form a continuous commotion with periodic shouts and commands in Marren's native language.

A cry broke through the air...

***

I opened my eyes to daylight. Next to me was a wooden bassinet covered with soft white fur. It was too high for me to see inside. I reached out a numb and heavy hand towards the bed where my child laid.

“She's over here,” a tired and reserved voice fell upon me in a wave of such immense relief I began to sob.

I turned my head towards Marren, holding a child wrapped in a small blanket. Her arm stuck out just slightly.
A tiny arm, with a tiny hand, and tiny fingers clutched into a fist.
The color of skin was a softer shade of Marren's copper tone.  Soft coos came from the tiny thing, bringing a smile of such warmth and joy to Marren's face. He walked over to me and held her so I could see the beautiful tiny face of the creature that had lived inside me.
A tiny human face.
Already holding features of her father, including his black hair and impossibly black eyes.
  He started to bounce her gently.

I tried to sit up but couldn't. “Why can't I move?”

Marren's face fell. He turned and gently laid the tiny girl in her bed, then turned to face me, kneeling down to meet my gaze. “It's the cream we had to use to keep you out of pain.”

“How come I don't remember?”

“You lost a lot of blood and fainted. We thought you were dying so we had to cut the baby out. I gave Okelo strict orders to take care of her like she was her own because I was going to die too.” His words came out calm and even. But he couldn't hide the sadness that swelled in his eyes. “I can help you to sit up and then you can hold her.”

“Did you name her?” I asked.

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I was waiting for you, but I did have a name in mind.”

“What?”

“My Mother's name, Naloud.”

I smiled. “Then Naloud it is.”

The weeks passed by
, one blurring into the next. We were happy.
Very happy.
My family felt complete and I was even more grateful for Marren's touch and to be with him in ways I longed for. It didn't always happen. Naloud saw to that. She would always get upset just before we would sneak away and sometimes only Marren would do to calm her.