Then he spotted the silken puddle of her ruined dress and sighed with relief. She couldn’t leave because she didn’t have proper clothing. And if Pam tried borrowing something of his, he would’ve been woken by the racket since his dresser drawers squeaked and the rolling doors on his closet rumbled like thunder.
Nothing would fit anyway since he was a foot taller and outweighed her by a good hundred pounds. So Pam was SOL if she wanted to run off. He relaxed against the pillows, smiling. Maybe he was a bit of a knuckle dragger for destroying her dress, but he’d do it again if it kept her naked and by his side.
Then a sudden vision appeared like an omen—that of a grim-faced Pam hailing a cab in the hooker shoes, her lacy thigh highs the only article of clothing visible under her randomly buttoned winter coat. His smile faded.
Jared leaped from the bed and dragged on his sweatpants, tamping down an overwhelming need to bellow out her name. His heart pounding, he sprinted from the room.
He skidded to a halt in the kitchen doorway, experiencing one of those special moments when the urge to ogle his girlfriend and to yell at her fought for supremacy. On this particular occasion, he was too stunned to decide on an immediate course of action.
Instead of locating a footstool or waiting for assistance, Pam had clambered atop the kitchen counter and at present was rummaging through the upper cabinets for whatever object she felt worthy of risking her neck. In those goddamned hooker shoes. While wearing an oversize T-shirt from which a sliver of her pretty pink ass peeked as she reached into the depths of the cabinet.
With a crow of victory, she heaved out a large silver espresso machine. Its weight threw her off balance and she teetered on the stilettos. Jared rushed over just in time. Bracing his hands against her butt, he commanded, “Don’t move.”
Pam screeched, one hand clutching the contraption and the other grasping one of the shelves in a death grip. “Shit, Jared! You scared the hell out of me!” She jerked her head around, then swayed as if just noticing her precarious perch on the marble countertop. “Oh, God. I’m feeling dizzy,” she said, closing her eyes and pressing her forehead against the partition.
“Put the espresso machine back,” Jared bit out.
“But I want…”
“Do it,” he ground out between clenched teeth.
She complied with great reluctance and stood stiffly waiting.
Jared adopted his most soothing tone. “Now using the shelf for balance—it’s solid and will hold—bend at the knees. Then lean back a little and on the count of three let go so I can catch you.”
She positioned herself as instructed and on the count of three, fell into his arms like a trusting child. He shifted and caught her under the knees and armpits.
Pam fluttered her lashes at him. “My hero,” she said flirtatiously.
Damn, she was cute, but he refused to be distracted. “What were you thinking, Pam?”
She had the decency to look contrite. “I was going through the fridge for breakfast stuff and saw the can of espresso in the back. Then I remembered you mentioned that for your birthday someone had given you”—her voice dipped an octave with a touch of drawl—“some fancy-ass, douchey espresso machine.” She continued in her normal voice. “Since I hate that drippy crap you drink and love cappuccinos… Remember that time I drank two huge triple shots and went into orbit and couldn’t shut up? Well, I decided to search. And sure enough, it was hidden in your cabinets, rusting away from neglect.”
She took a fortifying breath, but Jared beat her to the punch. “I know. You want me to get it for you now,” he said while setting Pam on her feet.
After checking her for steadiness, Jared reached up, grabbed the frigging thing, and set it on the counter. “Here you go.” He looked down and frowned. “Now promise me next time you face a challenging situation, you’ll either ask for backup or pause and come up with a better strategy.”
“You and your military terms.” Pam sighed, rolling her eyes. Something in his bearing made her snap to attention. “I promise,” she said.
He gestured to her feet. “By the way, why are you wearing those shoes?”
Her face fell. “I thought you wanted me to keep them on, like a reminder or something. Aren’t you pleased?”
He felt himself softening despite his agitation. “I do appreciate your willingness to please me.”
She looked downcast. “You’re just saying that to be nice. I’m such a hopeless flake. I act dumb as a rock sometimes.”
Jared snorted. “You’re smart as hell and you know it. Recall that you managed to beat me at chess a couple of times
after
you decided to focus. Not many people can say that.”
“I bet you let me win,” she sniffed.
He gave her an arch look. “First of all, that would be like lying to you. Not going to happen. Second, I’m too competitive to allow anyone to win without a fight. Even you.”
Pam laughed. “Duly noted.”
He sat down and balanced her on his lap. “Right leg.”
She lifted it and he removed the shoe. “Whatever we do in the bedroom doesn’t necessarily continue out of it.” He paused a moment. “Left leg.” He peeled off the second shoe, then checked the pinky toe. “Goddamn it, Pam…now you’ve got a blister.” He held up her chin and regarded her with sudden severity. “Understand from now on…our scenes don’t carry outside the bedroom unless I say otherwise. I’ll not have you hurt in any way. Got that?”
She nodded. “Got it.”
“Good. Now show me how to work this ridiculous gadget. I haven’t got a clue.”
During breakfast, Jared announced they were going shopping. He wouldn’t say anything else but instead grabbed Pam’s apartment keys and drove to her place for a change of clothing. He arrived back at the condo with two outfits and all the necessary accessories.
Pam was thrilled. “I thought you were keeping me naked the entire weekend,” she teased, holding up a negligee he’d found in her lingerie drawer.
Her brow lifted, and she arrowed a mischievous look at him. Jared mentally braced himself, knowing what typically followed that particular expression. “And how apropos that you brought this, Jared…considering I bought it for the six-month anniversary celebratory sexcapade that never happened.”
Jared winced. Folding his arms over his chest, he said, “The weekend’s not over yet, brat. Don’t push your luck.”
She continued digging through the bag. “Oh, myyy. A bra and panties too. I think I’ve died and gone to heaven.”
He shrugged. “You’ll be trying on clothes today. That’s the only reason I’m allowing you to wear undergarments.”
Pam gave him a sideways glance. “Let me get this straight. If I wasn’t trying on clothes, you’d have me go braless and pantyless in public?”
“Yes.”
“Now that’s kinky,” she murmured, looking as if it made her hot and squirmy to think of it.
“Indeed it is. And sexy. The thought of you being so accessible makes me hornier than hell.” He pulled her close. “No one would know but us.”
Pam rested her head against his chest. “Well, I’m glad this time, at least, I get to wear my undies.”
“So what do you say?” Jared prompted.
He felt her smile against his chest. “Awesome?”
Brat.
“Pam…” He patted her ass in warning.
She looked up at him, and a ray of winter sunshine caught the violet flecks in her eyes. His breath hitched, and he stared down at her, mesmerized.
“Thank you, Jared.” Her voice was a caress. “My wonderful Sir.” Standing on her tiptoes, she gave him a hasty peck on the lips. “I’ll take just twenty minutes to get ready. Promise.”
Jared gave her a disbelieving smirk. Only after she had frowned at him and sauntered away did he close his eyes, lean against the counter, and adjust himself with a shaking hand.
* * * *
The minute they arrived at Jared’s apartment later that evening, Pamela sat on the floor and excitedly unwrapped the two new dresses.
“Jared…they’re beautiful! But two?” She held up the replacement for her torn dress. “This beauty cost five times more than the one I wore yesterday!” She twirled it so she could admire its violet hue and graceful lines.
Jared shrugged and settled back against the sofa. “Why choose if you like both?”
Pam continued staring at the dress, unable to take her gaze off it. “It’s so simple yet elegant and sexy at the same time.” She put it aside, then reached over and held up the black cocktail dress he’d insisted on buying as well. “Notice the workmanship on this one. Pure genius. It’s a classic little black dress. I’ll be wearing it for years to come. Well, as long as I can squeeze my butt into it.”
He managed to appear both pleased and amused at her giddy chatter. “I’m glad you like them, sugar.”
“I really do.” She picked up the violet dress again. “That thing I wore yesterday doesn’t even come close to this one in stylishness or beauty. I never would’ve picked this color, but it does look good on me. I thought the other dress was just okay when I tried it on earlier this week, yet the saleslady convinced me it was the newest trend. It’s really not my usual low-key style, but I wanted to try something different for a change, so I decided to get out of my rut and go for something new and exciting.”
“What were you really planning on getting when you bought it? A new style or a new man?” Jared’s harsh words cut through her happy mood like a hot sword through butter.
Stunned, Pam lowered the dress and looked up into his stormy eyes. “
Jared.
”
His features set into hard lines. “Don’t sound so reproachful. We haven’t discussed why you did it, so the matter isn’t completely resolved.”
Her spine stiffened. “Why are we rehashing this? I thought you forgave me.”
“A few whacks on your ass will not make it all better,” he retorted.
She tossed the dress aside. “So what’s it going to be now? Payback time?”
“No. I don’t wish to punish you. I only want to get to the root cause of why it happened.”
“Root cause? Of what? A stupid dinner date with a man I’m not even attracted to? I told you I didn’t do anything with Brian beyond going out to dinner.”
Jared leaned forward. “Why, Pam? How could you be so foolish as to date a superior? Why didn’t you talk to me? Give me hell? I would’ve listened.”
“Ha!” she snapped. “What a waste of time that would’ve been. You were more interested in expanding your damned business than in being my lover or friend.”
He recoiled at her biting words. “I made an honest mistake with you, and I’m trying to make amends.”
She hopped up on her feet, temper flaring. “Sorry is not a convenient eraser. So you expected me to spell out my every want and need? As if you didn’t know I was feeling neglected? Sorry, Marlowe, you’re not completely off the hook either.”
“I took responsibility for my actions. You should too.”
Pam spread her arms wide, incredulous. “I’ve apologized already. What do you want me to do to make it up to you? Shall I genuflect? Or better yet, how about I promise to remain your personal fuck toy until you get bored with me again in a couple of months?”
Jared bolted from the sofa. “Watch your mouth. I didn’t get bored with you. And don’t even imply that I would use you for my own sexual gratification without a thought for yours.” He swept a scorching gaze over her body. “I sure as hell didn’t hear any complaints last night.”
“Well, it’s about time,” Pam said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “How good of you to notice me
after
you caught me with another man. I wonder how long it would’ve taken you to step up to the plate otherwise.”
Jared’s eyes narrowed and he took a step forward. “Are you justifying your actions?”
She glared up at him, refusing to back down. “No, I’m not. I gave you my virginity. You took it and cast me aside. Did it ever occur to you that I needed reassurance afterward? Did you expect me to be twiddle my thumbs and wait around forever?”
He stilled. “I waited for you. I took the time to court you before taking you to my bed. When I did, it took me three days to make you mine. Do you have any idea how difficult it was for me after I ached for you day and night for months? Painful as hell, let me assure you. Despite the sexual drought, I haven’t touched another woman since we’ve met. I’ve been more than patient with you. I screw up once and your patience snaps.”
This time, Pam couldn’t think of a ready comeback. His words were not only irrefutable but uttered with a quiet dignity that shook her to the core. She held up her hands in defeat. “Okay. I get it. I suck as a girlfriend. I suck, period. I’m done with this conversation.” Whirling around, she spotted her purse and headed straight for it.
A viselike grip on her upper arm stopped her before she’d taken her first step. His hold wasn’t tight, but it was unbreakable.
“Let me go. I want to go home.” Her voice sounded shaky, even to her ears.
Jared dragged her against his chest, and she could feel the thunderous beats of his heart. He slowly turned her around to face him. One look at his stony countenance and her knees started knocking together. Man, he looked pissed. And determined as hell.
He spoke into the tense atmosphere, and she couldn’t help but flinch at his flinty tone. “First, never turn your back on me. It’s disrespectful.” He released her arm. “Second, if we’re ever going to resolve our issues, we need to communicate, however painful that might be. Walking away is cowardly, and it resolves nothing. We have to face our problems. No more avoidance behavior or silence.”
She looked up at him, her chest tight. “You’re the one who avoided
me
. Yes, you were patient during my initiation into sex, I’ll give you that. I couldn’t have asked for a more patient, gentle lover.”
Jared reached out, but she shook her head and pushed his hands away. “I’m not done. Just listen.”
She had his full attention now. “Afterward, though, I sensed you were backing off. We had sex a few times, true, but it seemed to me like you were bestowing a pity fuck rather than making love to me.”
“
Jesus
, Pam.”
She lifted her chin. “I didn’t feel cherished or adored. Instead, I felt like a huge disappointment to you. A burden. A tense, shaking mess who had no idea how to please a man. And I knew I could never measure up to your past lovers.”