“Maybe she recovered,” Pam ventured.
“No,” he stated. “The operation saved her life, but the damage was irreversible.” He took a deep breath. “I visited the village two months later. Her grandfather never blamed me for her injury and welcomed me into his home. He was convinced Brady would’ve killed them both if I hadn’t stepped in. He even thanked me for saving her life.” At this, Jared stopped. Visibly struggling, he opened his mouth to speak, then shut it.
“Go on,” Pam urged, rubbing his back.
“I saw her,” Jared muttered. “Such a cute kid, even with that beautiful mop of hair shaved off. I can’t describe how it felt when she smiled at me as if I were some kind of hero, rather than a monster who’d ended her dreams, her hopes of a better life…”
Pam bolted upward in outrage, startling him. “Monster?” she choked. “Are you serious?” She gaped at him, aghast at his words. “It was Brady who shot her, not you.”
Jared’s shoulders sagged. “I should’ve aimed for the other leg. Shooting him in the hand was a mistake. That’s why the gun went off…”
Pam placed her hands on his shoulders and gave him a slight shake. “Nonsense. Shooting him in the leg only slowed him down. Who knows what he would’ve done if you hadn’t disarmed him.” She leaned in. “It wasn’t your fault. If anything, you kept a bad situation from getting worse.”
Jared shrugged. “So everyone says. My superiors praised my actions, my men vouched for me, even my father…” His voice drifted away. “In the last few years, I’ve tried convincing myself I did the right thing. Sometimes I believe it, sometimes not.”
“It was the best decision under terrible circumstances,” Pam said with conviction. “Jared,” she asked in a tentative voice, “how did you get out of that place?”
Jared looked haunted at the memory. “It had turned into absolute chaos by the time we retreated. The villagers threw rocks at us as we carried Brady to safety. Sometimes I wake up in a sweat after dreaming of the mob screaming at us while Brady cried for his mother and wife.” He took a deep breath. “Brady fainted on the trip back, he’d lost so much blood. But he survived.”
Pam shivered. “Why? Why did he do it?”
“PTSD,” Jared said simply. “He’d been suffering in silence for some time because of a misdiagnosis. Later, we discovered he’d been self-medicating for months. Alcohol, pills—whatever he could get his hands on to dull the emotional pain. I don’t know how he procured them, but I suppose there’s always a way if you’re determined enough. I should have noticed…”
“If the doctors didn’t pick up on it, how could you? Men under that kind of stress often don’t show severe signs until it’s too late.” She paused. “Whatever became of him?” she asked.
“He was discharged on medical disability. They said he’d suffered a psychotic break.”
“Well, if he had PTSD, that’s no surprise. Why did it go undetected for so long?”
“The initial diagnosis was extreme anxiety.” Jared issued a bitter laugh. “No shit. Too many tours. A growing drug and alcohol habit. An untreated medical condition. And just like any illness left untreated, it worsened.”
Pam pondered this for a moment. “I can’t help thinking something set him off, though.”
Jared nodded. “Me too. Who knows what made him finally snap? I knew he was having issues but nothing so serious. I know Brady had seen his wife only three times in five years.” He examined the pattern on the rug. “And he had a seven-month-old baby girl he’d never met.” His anguished expression gave way to words. “How could a good guy, a
father
, for Christ’s sake, become twisted enough to threaten a kid and an unarmed old man?”
“I don’t know,” Pam admitted, feeling at a loss. “I guess he wasn’t himself anymore.”
“No, he wasn’t. At the end, he was unrecognizable.” Jared leaned back, and Pam noticed the lines of strain around his eyes. She wanted to smooth them away and to banish the guilt exuding from his very pores.
“I know in some ways I’ve lived a sheltered life,” she said, “but I’ve seen enough of the world’s injustice and cruelty to wonder why things are so brutal.”
Jared lifted her hand to his lips. “You’re such an empathetic soul. And you’re the last person I would ever want to hurt. Forgive me for snapping at you earlier.”
At his look of utter devotion, warmth spread through her body. “I’ve already forgiven you. You thought you were guarding your privacy. Such a story isn’t an easy one to tell.”
His look was pensive as he agreed. “It isn’t. I didn’t tell you because I was worried you’d think less of me.”
“Think less of you?” Pam shook her head in disbelief. “Actually, the opposite is true. I think you handled a crisis in the best way possible. You took charge like a true leader.”
He closed his eyes at her praise. “Thank you, sweetheart. It means the world to me to hear you say that.” He drew her closer and tucked her head under his chin. Strong arms enfolded her and, for a moment, peace returned. Pam sighed with contentment.
His next words came as a complete surprise. “My comment about your mother was stupid. She’s a great lady, you know.”
She pulled back from Jared in order to read his expression. Was he being sarcastic? “Really?” She smiled. “When did you come to that conclusion, Marlowe?”
Jared’s face turned serious. “Ever since my dumb-ass self realized what a phenomenal job she did by raising such an intelligent, honest, and kindhearted woman. And she did it alone.”
Touched, Pam hid her face in his neck, afraid she’d release a torrent if she so much as looked at him. “What a nice thing to say,” she managed.
He kissed the top of her head. “Not nice. True. As far as I’m concerned, anyone who’s raised such a wonderful human being deserves the greatest respect.” Pamela lost the good fight and burst into tears.
After soothing her with gentle teasing and a cup of tea, Jared spoke of the crisis that ensued when he resigned two years after the shooting. He’d returned home to a grim situation. His father had raged at him for throwing away a brilliant military career and, after several weeks of bitter fights, kicked him out of the house and disowned him.
At that point, his father’s older sister, Chloe, stepped in. She insisted Jared relocate to her home in Charleston until he found his direction. Two months after he moved in, she was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer. A scant four months later, she was gone, leaving the bulk of her estate to her favorite nephew. Already stunned at her untimely death, Jared was astounded at the considerable size of her fortune.
“Unbeknownst to anyone except her closest friends, she’d made a fortune selling her artwork—her watercolors really are extraordinary—and making shrewd investments in the stock market,” Jared said, his eyes sparkling. “Aunt Chloe was quite a character. Some people viewed her as eccentric—she refused to marry and never had kids—but in fact, she was a free spirit. I always admired Auntie because she lived her life just as she pleased and made no apologies for it.”
“You loved her,” Pamela stated, her throat tight.
“Yes, I did. She was everyone’s favorite when we were kids because she was such
fun
. I didn’t get to see her often, but she made quite an impression on me.”
“She sounds awesome. I wish I’d met her,” Pam said wistfully.
Jared smiled. “Me too. I know you would’ve loved each other. You’re a lot like her, always looking distracted to the casual observer, when in fact you’re very astute, and a force to be reckoned with, especially if crossed.”
“Huh,” she huffed.
He chuckled at her indelicate snort; then his eyes misted over. “She was my rock during a terrible crisis. I could’ve gotten my own place when my father kicked me out, but Aunt Chloe understood my need for a support system after leaving the service.”
Pam bit her lip. “What made you finally leave the military?” She gripped his arm. “Sorry,” she said quickly. “You don’t have to answer that until you’re ready.”
Jared smiled at her attempt at diplomacy. “Come on now, sugar. You’ve already dragged the worst out of me.”
Pam felt herself blush at his bantering tone. “Well, um…okay…guilty as charged. Might as well tell me the rest, then.” She wiggled closer, waiting for his response with rapt attention.
Jared laughed at her eagerness. “Nosy girl.” He kissed the scowl from her face and settled back. “Only after they promoted me to major did I realize I was slowly dying inside. Don’t get me wrong. I’m proud of my service to my country and feel honored to have served with some of the most dedicated people.”
“But?” she nudged.
“It just didn’t fit anymore. At one time, the military felt like a calling, but that was no longer the case. Strangely enough, I started having second thoughts even before the tragedy. I’d often ponder on if pleasing my father had been my greatest motivation rather than a wish to serve.” He shrugged. “I’m still not entirely sure, and it’s almost two years since I resigned.”
“What does it matter, really?” Pam observed. “You’ve moved on. In less than a year, you’ve established yourself in New York.”
“Thanks to Aunt Chloe…and the inheritance,” he reminded her.
Pam nodded. “True, but I doubt that just anyone can buy an apartment and start a security firm that has all the promise of becoming a huge success.” She snuggled closer.
“Pam?” Jared’s voice sounded hesitant.
“Hmmm?” She looked up at him and smiled. “Oh, Jared. I’m so pleased that we’ve made so much progress communicating. I feel so happy.” With that, she burrowed again into his arms, then caught herself. “Oops. You wanted to say something?”
Jared peered into her face, seeming to come to a conclusion. “It’s not important,” he said. “It can wait.”
* * * *
Judging by the angle of the sun, Pam figured it was just shy of noon when she woke up in Jared’s bed. She stretched, feeling rather decadent for taking a morning nap on a weekday. Her shoes and suit jacket had been removed at some point, and she marveled at how he’d managed such an undertaking without waking her.
Rolling over, she caught sight of Jared seated at his makeshift desk, fully absorbed in whatever task he was completing on his laptop. Within moments, though, he went still and looked in her direction, his uncanny instincts reminding her of his military training. Her smile of greeting wavered under his penetrating scrutiny, then vanished when he stood up, never breaking eye contact with her as he pulled off the headset and powered down.
She sat up as he strode toward her without saying a word. When he reached the edge of the bed, he gripped her nape while his other hand freed her hair from its tidy chignon. That done, he bent over and kissed her, his invading tongue exploring the recesses of her mouth.
Still silent, he removed her shell and bra, then helped her up from the bed until she stood in front of him. Next to go were her pencil skirt and stockings. Instead of removing her panties, though, he squatted and placed a kiss on her silk-covered mound, his hot mouth searing the tender skin once again like a brand of ownership. A nuzzle and a hard lick over her pussy brought a sigh to her lips, while a playful nip at her swelling clit made her jolt.
His long, searching tongue moved to tease the junctures of her thighs where the lace edges of pantie met delicate skin, causing her to shiver at the sheer sensuality of the act. Emboldened, she held on to his broad shoulders to steady herself. When he didn’t correct her behavior, she combed her fingers through his thick, downy hair.
Soon the panties followed the rest of her clothing. Jared rose and stepped behind her, still fully clothed, and Pam felt the warmth of his body even before they touched. The sounds of a wrapper tearing broke the silence before his lips found the side of her neck and traced a burning path to her shoulder.
She bit down a moan as he placed his stiff erection against the small of her back, resting it against the column of her lower spine. A hand drifted over her belly, the fingers fanning out to span its breadth. He moved her closer and covered her smaller frame with his hard body, his shaft lurching in time with the needy pulsing of her clit.
Something cool and smooth trailed up the side of her thigh, but she dared not look down. Her breath caught in her chest as the object skimmed over her hip to pause at the top of the cleft of her ass. He trailed a hand over her stomach and cupped a breast as the rounded object made its way down and parted the cleft. She bit her lip when he placed it at the entrance of her anus and applied the tiniest bit of pressure.
Finally, Jared spoke in her ear. “I’m going to fuck that virgin ass of yours very soon, my pet,” he murmured. He chuckled when she stiffened. “But not today.” The object moved from her back passage and materialized in front of her face. Blue tempered glass. A stylized teardrop shape. Small, with a stopper at the end. “It’s a butt plug—the smallest of several that I’m going to use to get your ass ready for my cock.”
As he said this, he let an inquisitive finger rim her back passage—the gesture one part request, one part dare. She rubbed her butt against his steely dick, her body answering the silent invitation before her brain could think of a response.
Growling low, Jared grabbed a fistful of her hair and maneuvered her toward the bed. When she climbed in, he ordered in a harsh voice, “Kneel. Now lean over, stretch your arms up and touch the mattress with your forehead. Good.” He adjusted her position, bringing her closer to the edge.
The pose was the epitome of submission. Never in her life had she felt so vulnerable. Almost knowing better, Pam shifted her position so her butt wasn’t sticking up as high in the air.
Ever vigilant, Jared swatted her rump and snapped, “Be still.”
He repositioned her, and Pam squeezed her eyes shut, feeling a peculiar mix of mortification and excitement sweep over her as she presented herself to the man behind her.
Cool liquid dribbled down her crack and she gave an involuntary jerk at the unaccustomed sensation. No warning tap came. Instead, he cupped her hip as a finger slid inside her rosette, working the lubricant inside her passage with gentle twirling motions. She groaned at the strange sensation, and Jared made calming noises as he continued stretching her tissues.