Here for You (30 page)

“Oh sure. I have two younger brothers at home. I think I’ve been missing the chaos, actually.”

Marc tilted his head and smiled. “Welcome, then. We’ll provide some for you.”

Cole grinned. None of them were known for their manners, but all his housemates stuck together, even Marc. They might have rough edges, but they stuck.

“Beers.” Sandy ran up. “I have more beers.”

As they opened some, River finally edged closer. He took one.

“To our house,” Tomas said. “And new housemates.”

“And to Eggs,” Marc added. “We’ll miss you, you pain in the ass.”

Cole only smiled. He met River’s eyes and hoisted up his beer. “And to Brendan. Always.”

They toasted, lifting their beers and then sharing a moment of silence.

“Okay, hell. Enough sap. Let’s party,” Marc declared. He cranked the music.

Andrew and Sandy decided to go ahead and dance, and Tomas watched Marc. He turned to River and Cole and said ruefully, “Ten bucks he drives either Andrew or Sandy out by Christmas.”

“You’ll just have to rein Marc in,” Cole said.

“Either way, you don’t come back, Cole.” River shot him a troubled frown. “You need to promise that.”

Cole nodded. He looked River straight in the eyes. “And you have to visit us down the road. And not disappear on us. Deal?”

River’s mouth twisted. “Deal.”

The bon voyage party kicked into high gear. Laughter and good food and music were all claiming their attention. Other people floated in and out of the party, enjoying the music and food, but the night was about their memories, their affections, past and future.

But then Ian—so handsome and sexy—approached Cole, and once Cole lifted his gaze to him, he never looked anyplace else. Ian took his hand and kissed him briefly. His smile was warm with affection. Most of all, it was an intimate sort of smile. Ian’s smile said he knew who Cole was, knew him completely, his flaws and good parts both, and loved him. Cole caught his breath. The whole world lay ahead for them, and Cole would not waste a second of it.

T
HEY
SLOWLY
made love that night. Ian lay among the pillows and blanket as Cole undressed in front of him, letting Ian take him in with his appreciative, tender gaze. Cole joined Ian in their bed, and Ian brushed a hand over Cole’s shoulder before he kissed him. Cole kissed him back with a passion that rocked them both.

Later Cole stayed awake, looking at Ian sleeping peacefully, knowing he was where he should be. His hand rested on the hourglass tattoo.

C
OLE
MOVED
the remainder of his things out the next day.

“You okay?” Ian asked as they opened some boxes in the bedroom.

“I’m terrific. But I might need a few more drawers.” Cole contemplated their bedroom, hands on his hips.

“Take the whole dresser, for all I care.”

“Careful, I might. Your things might be relegated to a tiny shelf in the bathroom. Even all your fancy suits.”

“As long as you don’t kick me out of the bed.”

Cole’s gaze connected with Ian’s. “Not a chance.”

They both smiled. Cole didn’t have all that much to unpack, but it felt good to know that Ian would share. Cole touched one of Ian’s crisp white shirts. He might never need the closet space that Ian had, never be in the type of job that required him to dress formally. If he were really lucky, Cole imagined writing full-time one day in his pajamas. If not, he’d be fine working in the bar and writing his stories for his own pleasure. Either way, he didn’t picture putting on Armani and going to the office like Ian did.

“Breakfast?” Ian asked, watching him. “I could make us some while you figure out the drawers.”

“Breakfast sounds good.”

“Good.” Ian paused, his gaze intense. “I want you to be at home here.”

“Go make breakfast.” Cole mockingly shooed him. “I have closet space to contemplate.” But inside, he felt all melted and good.

Ian left. Cole spent a few minutes looking over his boxes. But Ian returned less than ten minutes later, his expression far more serious than before.

“What is it?”

“I started an omelet, and while it was cooking, I went to the mailbox. I found this.” Ian held out a letter.

Cole’s heart stuttered as he saw the address. It was from Brendan’s brother, Owen.

Ian put an arm around his shoulders. “Open it.”

With a shaky nod, Cole opened the letter and began to read it:

Dear Cole,

Thank you for telling me about my brother Brendan and sending his original letter. The words “I’m sorry” seem woefully inadequate, but it’s all I have.

I work at a prep school as a history teacher. I enjoy the kids. I fall in love with them all each semester, truthfully, despite the fact that to most of them, history is what happened five minutes ago. I’m in Georgia, as you see, not too far from you. I’ve considered your invitation to visit and see where Brendan lived and meet his friends…. I’m not quite ready for it. This is, as you might imagine, a lot to process. But maybe by Christmas? Or by my spring break? Maybe then I’ll be ready. I’d like to keep your invitation open, if that’s all right.

Yours sincerely,

Owen King

Brendan’s death had changed so much. Cole felt monumentally older than he had the summer before. Sometimes he still struggled with feeling happy, but he knew deep down that Brendan would want no less for them.

All his life Cole had dreamed of permanence, of certainty, of a place to say was his. He knew in his heart that nobody could ever know the future. The ground under his feet might shift; life might turn on a dime.

“Cole,” Ian said, his eyes full of concern.

“I’m all right,” Cole assured him. He leaned against Ian, and Ian held him close. This, he’d learned, was how to get through the ambiguity. Here was a partner to be with him when life became lost and then found.

“What are you going to do with the letter?”

“Write him back. Show it to the others.”

Ian kissed his lips lightly. “Looks as if you made the right call when you got in touch with him. He seems interested in visiting, and I like the tone of his letter. He sounds nice.”

“Yeah, he does. Doesn’t he?” Cole carefully folded Owen’s letter and put it away. He hoped Owen would come to Ocean Vista someday. He’d like to meet him.

O
WEN
’
S
LETTER
wasn’t the only piece of mail Cole received that week. He had two e-mails on his laptop too. Two e-mails he left unread as his stomach jumped, his palms sweated, and he waited for Ian to return home from work.

“I’m too fucking nervous to look. This could validate that I have a shot at this writing business or—” Cole licked his lips. “—not.”

“But why let it determine your belief in yourself?” Ian said. “Don’t give another person’s rejection or acceptance of your story such power.”

“You’re right.”

“Of course I’m right.”

Cole rolled his eyes at Ian.

Ian smiled. “So? Click it open already. Find out. Not knowing is always worse.”

Cole moved his mouse over the in-box. He hesitated, and Ian wrapped his arms around him. “Sometimes, you have to take a chance. Like I did with you every time you shot me down or told me to go away, remember? I didn’t give up on you, because I never stopped believing.”

“I’m so glad you didn’t.” Cole’s voice was soft. He stared at the e-mail.
Oh God
—here it goes.

Cole clicked the first message open. It was a rejection. As Ian leaned in to read it too, Cole slumped down.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

“It’s okay. They encourage me to try again.” Cole read the words numbly. He took a deep breath. “I suppose that’s good. I don’t think everybody gets an honest note and not just a form letter.”

“You should send it somewhere else.”

“I will. Don’t look so worried, Ian. It’s okay. It stings, but—” Cole swallowed. “—it’s not going to change my desire to write. You really were right about that.” He smiled briefly at Ian. “Might as well get this over with, huh?” He clicked the next message.

Dear Mr. Gannon,

Stellar Press is happy to offer you….

“I can’t believe it.” Cole read the e-mail once, twice. He closed his eyes, waited, and then opened them again, half expecting the acceptance message to disappear. “Holy shit! They want
me
! Holy shit!”

Cole danced around the desk, relief pouring through him, before he hurled himself into Ian’s arms.

“Damn right they want you.” Ian hugged him, hard.

Cole pressed his face to Ian’s shoulder and hung on to him. “I can’t believe it, Ian! I’m going to be published. My story is going to be published! It’s a fucking miracle for me. A miracle.”

“Miracles do happen,” Ian said gently. “Even on ordinary days.”

“Yes, but I thought one was my limit.” Cole looked into Ian’s magnetic blue eyes. “Who knew I would get you
and
be published?”

B
Y
MUTUAL
agreement, they celebrated at Andrew’s café with mocha lattes and cheesecake.

“Sure you don’t want a fancy French meal?”

“I’ve got what I want right here.”

Ian’s mouth quirked, no doubt at Cole’s continued sappiness, but he didn’t care. He meant it. Cole, sipping coffee, sat cross from Ian, who was dressed in a buttoned-up shirt and dark gray slacks, and Cole meant it with all his heart. Ian looked so damn sexy. Cole couldn’t wait to celebrate some more by ripping Ian’s clothes off and taking him to bed. He might pull off Ian’s cotton briefs with his teeth. He was most definitely going to swallow his cock and devour it with earth-shattering, hard sucks.

Ian’s brows arched. “What are you thinking?”

Cole traced his lower lip with his tongue.

“Cole—” Ian groaned out his name.

Smiling wickedly, Cole took a little foam from his latte and let it linger on his mouth, before licking it off slowly.

Ian took a sharply indrawn breath. “We’re leaving. Now.”

T
HE
MOMENT
they opened the front door, Ian took Cole in his arms, kissing him wildly. The need for each other was undeniable—it was white-hot.

Cole grabbed him by the buttons on his shirt. “You’re about to be naked.”

“I’m on board with that plan.”

Cole saw the heat and hunger in Ian’s gaze and knew it matched his own.

Then there were no words. In their haste, they tripped over a few boxes that Cole had yet to unpack. They tumbled to the bed, going at each other’s clothes. When they were nude, they became lost in each other. His blood hummed, his nerves sizzled, as Ian touched him. He stole Cole’s breath.

Ian lovingly glided his hand down Cole’s chest. He caressed Cole’s nipples, rubbing them to tiny points, and then lowered to touch Cole’s stomach. Ian kissed the hollow of his throat, grazing it with his teeth, making Cole buck upward.

“Your response to me drives me crazy.” Ian’s tongue swept over Cole’s navel, toward his jutting erection. “I couldn’t believe how you looked at me when we first met. I never thought…. Nobody ever looked at me that way.”

Ian’s hand was at Cole’s arousal now. His fingers slid over the head and down the veiny underside. Cole moaned and caught Ian’s wrist. “I want to suck you too.”

With a growl of agreement, Ian turned so that his cock was near Cole’s mouth. He lifted Cole’s rigid length in his hands and stroked it softly. “Mutual sucking. But I’m going to make you come tonight more than once.”

Cole groaned. He gripped Ian’s solid, hard asscheeks. He settled his mouth at Ian’s balls, and Ian’s shout went right to Cole’s dick as he began to lick at Ian’s sac in long strokes. Ian bent his head and began to taste Cole. They took each other, mouths wet and greedy for more, sucking down, tongues pushing, cocks moving in deep, hard strokes. Cole dug his fingers into Ian’s ass as he took Ian’s cock farther down his throat. Ian’s ball sac tightened. His own balls were tight too, and Ian made Cole teeter on the edge as his full lips worked his dick. Ian’s dick, long and hard, slid even deeper into Cole’s mouth, and Cole let out a rough, muffled cry. He shook. He held off one more aching minute, to suck Ian’s dick, to make Ian fall with him.

Cole pressed his thumb at Ian’s hole.

“Oh no, no—” Ian twisted above him.

Oh yes.

Ian came violently in his mouth. Cum spilled into Cole’s throat as he swallowed. The last of Cole’s resistance fled, and he climaxed equally hard, his orgasm rough and desperate, shuddering and offering Ian his cum, which Ian sucked dry. Cole spurted a final time, then shut his eyes, his heart pounding.

Ian rolled off him and turned to hold him close. He pressed their lips together in an intimate kiss, as if they hadn’t just shared such wild passion. But the sweetness of the gesture made a lump form in Cole’s throat. He felt the connection between them in the lingering silence, as loud as any words. They lay there, spent. Right where they belonged.

L
ATER
C
OLE
ran a bath for them. He laid out two fluffy towels and then poured some specialty bubbles into the water. Swishing the water with his fingers, Cole caught sight of his own reflection. He did a double take at the dreamy, soft expression on his face.

“What’s with all the bubble bath?” Ian asked, coming into the bathroom. Even though they’d had crazy, frenzied sex, Cole still reacted to the sight of Ian’s naked body. “Just felt like it.” Cole shrugged. He didn’t say that he’d never bathed with somebody before, that he wanted to do it now, with Ian, in their house, on this night. “No big deal.”

He walked to Ian and hugged him. Ian kissed his temple.