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I gently remove the brush from her clenched fingers. “Here. Let me.” She stares at me, looking almost startled to see me.

I begin brushing. The fine sandy-colored strands untangle easily. I look over the top of her head, meeting her eyes as she watches me in the mirror. It’s silent, save for the distant noise of showers.

I start at the sound of her voice. “I should have gone with you.”

I pause for a moment, then resume brushing. “What do you mean?”

“When you tried to get me to leave with you and Will … I should have gone. I was just so
used
to not liking you. I didn’t want to follow you.”

“It’s okay.” What else can I say? It’s over and done.

“None of this would be happening if I had gone with you. I’m sorry. For everything, Jacinda.”

I shrug, trying to act like it’s nothing. “Then we never would have found Deghan. Some good came of it. He’d still be a prisoner in there. All those other draki would still be captives.” True, all the draki had implants, and are most likely going to be captured again, but they at least have a chance now. Just like Miram does. And I don’t want her focusing on the negatives.

“I guess I should care about them,” she says, looking at her scrubbed-fresh face in the mirror. Impossibly young, innocent. “But I just wish none of it had ever happened. I wish I were home. With Dad. Aunt Jabel.”

I finish with her hair, unsure what to say to that. Not sure there is anything to say.

Tamra joins us then, already dressed. “Your turn,” she says.

“Great. I’ll be fast. Why don’t you two go get some food and I’ll meet you back at the van?”

Tamra nods and gathers up her things. I shower quickly, even though I would love nothing more than to stand under the warm spray for an hour and let it ease all the tension from my body.

I meet up with Will on the way back from the shower. He’s carrying a brown paper bag.

“Get anything good?”

“Oh yeah.” He smiles. Now that he’s freshly showered and shaved, his clean soapy scent fills my nose. “C’mon. I’ll show you.” Taking my hand, he pulls me off the asphalt parking lot to one of the many picnic tables dotting the grass.

We sit on top of a splintery-wood table and he fumbles inside the brown bag. I try to get a glimpse, but he shakes a finger at me and twists his body so I can’t see inside it.

He looks over his shoulder. “Ready?”

I grin and bounce my knees. “Yes! Show me.”

He whips around. “Ta-da!”

I stare down uncomprehendingly at the box in his hands. “What is it?”

He looks from me to the box in amazement. “
What is it?
” he echoes. “You don’t know?”

I read the print on the box. “Cracker Jack?”

He nods excitedly.

I examine the box. Caramel-coated popcorn and peanuts. “So … junk food?”

He looks appalled. “Not just any junk food. It’s like the first junk food ever.” He rips open the box and shakes some of the sticky popcorn into my palm, then his. “This was my mom’s favorite.”

He tosses the snack into his mouth and chews. I watch for a moment, enjoying the sight of him, the way his eyes crinkle in pleasure. I relish just sitting here. With him. “You don’t talk about her that much.”

“I was so young when she died. I wish I could remember her more clearly,” he says matter-of-factly as he shakes some more Cracker Jack into his hand. “At night, in my bed, I try to run through all the memories of her I do have, almost like I’m exercising them, you know?” He looks at me. “Keeping them fresh and in shape before they fade away completely.”

I nod and blink suddenly burning eyes. “Yeah. I get that.” Haven’t I done the same thing with my own memories of my father?

His gaze roves over my face—like he’s memorizing me and this moment. “Yeah. I guess you do.”

Tossing back his head, he drops more Cracker Jack into his mouth.

I copy him. “Hmm, pretty good.”

He shakes his head and bumps me with his shoulder. “I can’t believe you’ve never had Cracker Jack before.”

My eyes widen. “Had it? I’ve never even seen the stuff,” I confess.

“Oh, blasphemy.”

“Hey! I’ve spent like … what? Two months out in the human world? My education hasn’t covered Cracker Jack yet.” I giggle, swaying on the top of the table. “I’ve got a lot to learn. I admit it.”

Still wearing that melting grin, he reaches for my hair, smoothing a hand down the wet strands. “We’ll have all the time in the world. And I’ll teach you,” he murmurs. And suddenly I’m fairly certain we’re not talking about future lessons in junk food.

My cheeks burn as he leans in to kiss me. At my lips, he whispers, “Soon, Jacinda. It will be us. We’re going to have peace. We’ll be free. And happy.”

Every part of me comes alive at the first brush of his mouth. I taste the salty Cracker Jack on his mouth and know I’ll never forget the sensation of this moment.

“We better get going,” I say, standing.

“Yeah.” He sighs, grabbing the bag. “But wait. Almost forgot the best part.” He shakes popcorn everywhere, digging through the box. “Ah, I got it!”

“What is that?”

“The prize. Every box comes with a prize.” Something falls into his palm. He gazes at it for a long moment, a slow smile curving his well-carved lips.

“What?” I nudge him with my elbow playfully.

He seizes my hand. “This is perfect. Until I can get you something better.” He slides a purple plastic ring on my finger. The band fits just right.

We both stare at it for a moment. The top of the plastic band is a hollowed-out heart. I outline that tiny heart with one fingertip.

“Now you can look down at your hand any time. Even if I’m not there, you’ll know.” His warm fingers squeeze mine, and our gazes find each other.

“Know what?” I whisper.

“That you have my heart. That I love you.”

Those words, his deep gaze … I can’t catch my breath. But then I feel as though something like oxygen might not be necessary when I have him. He feeds me … breathes life into me. Makes everything good. He stuck with me through everything: my disappearance, my bonding with Cassian … always putting me above himself. It’s a miracle he hasn’t run in the opposite direction.

In the distance, the van honks. I look up and spot Tamra standing near the driver’s side, sliding her arm back out the window. She’s anxious to get moving—no doubt nervous about the hunters catching up to us. At this reminder, the smile slips from my face. Just like that, the happy moment is diminished.

“C’mon.” I head toward the van. I only get a few feet before Will reclaims my hand. And I’m glad for that. Glad at the feel of his finger tracing the ring band on my hand. That no matter how bad everything is he hasn’t let go of me. Maybe he never will. No matter what comes. No matter what I ask of him. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve him. I just know that I don’t want to lose this boy who has come to mean so much to me. Everything.

“Oh, hey. I forgot to get batteries for the flashlights and lamps. I think we’re low.” He thrusts the bag of food into my arms. “I’ll be right back.”

I turn, admire his lean form as he jogs back to the mega-complex.

“Jacinda?”

I start at the sound of my name. Cassian stands behind me. I’m not surprised I didn’t hear his approach … but I am surprised I didn’t
feel
him there. Annoyance flickers in his gaze as he looks beyond me to Will. Looking back at me, he quickly cools the emotion from his eyes, but I still feel its lingering touch inside.

“Yes?” I ask, hating the awkwardness of the moment.

“I just wanted to thank you.”

“For what?”

“For everything you’ve done for my sister. I know you two haven’t always gotten along.”

I smile. “How about never?”

He smiles back, angling his head in agreement. And in that killer smile, the flash of his straight, white teeth in his swarthy face, I’m reminded just how many girls covet this boy. And not just for his power and position in the pride. “Yeah. She hasn’t made it easy for you to like her. Afraid my father had a lot to do with that.” His smile fades. “But you still wanted to rescue her … and stood by her when you thought I was dead.”

“I did it for you.”

Quiet falls between us and I fidget nervously beneath his intent stare. I think about his words … how we risked so much to rescue her … and swallow tightly. She is still in peril. She isn’t out of the woods yet. Was he trying to guilt me into staying and helping? But looking into his liquid dark eyes, I see only sincerity in the lines of his face. There is no ulterior motive in this conversation.

“Here.” He takes the bag from my arms and together we walk toward the van, our steps silent on the asphalt.

I send him a measuring glance. There’s a slight limp in his tread. “How are you doing?”

“I’ll live. Should be my old self soon. We heal quickly, after all.” True. Which makes me think that he must have been hurt very bad to still suffer the effects. Something curls up and withers inside me to think of Cassian in pain.

He shoots me a look, his lips twisting into a smile that I imagine is supposed to encourage me and convince me of his well-being. “Don’t beat yourself up, Jacinda.” Of course he would
feel
my feelings—that the idea of him hurt nauseates me. “It’s over and done. I’ll be okay,” he says, gently stroking a finger down my cheek. He frowns, stepping back and dropping his hand. Regret over the touch swiftly slides through him. We reach the van and he conveniently moves away, carrying the bag to the front seat.

I stand beside the back doors, the rumble of his words replaying through my head.
It’s over
. Is it? Is it really? Can I let go of him and the others with that question, that fear winding through me like a virus?

I rest my head against the hard wall of the van and blow out a great gust of breath. A dull headache throbs behind my eyes. Cassian wanted to ride up front. I thought the request strange but didn’t think a little alone time between Will and Cassian was a bad thing.

I rub my eyelids with my thumb and forefinger, pressing upward into the bridge of my nose. I do this several times, trying to ease my headache.

Deghan sits across from me, just staring with his pewter eyes … eyes so cold I shiver. Finally, I can’t stand it anymore. I drop my hand from my eyes and demand, “What are you looking at?”

“You.”

I snort. “Clearly. Why do you keep staring at me?”

Tamra looks up, evidently interested in his response.

He makes a small motion with his hand. “You remind me of someone.”

Shaking my head, I glance away, down at the van floor, feeling its rumble through the soles of my shoes. I’m not interested in some draki that I remind him of, some draki who he—

My gaze snaps back to him. Every nerve in my body pulls taut, suddenly alert.

“Who?” I demand.

He shrugs. “Just another captive. He was there when I was brought in. He was an onyx but you remind me of him. The way you rub at your eyes and nose. He did that. Also the way you hold yourself … angle your head to the side when someone is talking. You get this intent look on your face. Like you’re almost angry.”

Was?
It’s the word that ricochets through my head.

He continues, “You have the same … way about you.”

I’m shaking now. A sick feeling churns in my stomach. “What happened to him?”

“They took him out of his cell one day for more experimenting.” A dullness enters his eyes. “He never came back. But you know the worst thing about it?”

Worse than his dying?

“What?” Tamra asks, holding herself as still as stone, and I know the same thoughts whir through her mind.

“His own kind betrayed him. He said someone in his pride tricked him into getting captured. Led him right into the path of hunters.”

My skin flashes hot and cold at this. I fight to swallow around the lump in my throat. “What was his name?” I say tightly, my lips numb, barely moving.

Don’t say my father’s name. Not Magnus. Not Magnus
.

“Magnus.”

I vault to my feet, arms wide, stretching out at my sides as if seeking a handhold, something to cling to. My world spins. Red fills my vision. Tamra lowers her head into her hands and surrenders to body-shaking tears.

I pound on the van wall until my palms sting, and even then I don’t quit. “Stop,” I shout. “Stop!”

The van slows. Once it stops, I fling open the doors and run—take off through the trees running as fast and hard as I can. Not caring where I’m going. Just trying to get away, escape the pain, the throbbing, unrelenting ache in my chest.

In the distance, I hear my name being shouted, but I don’t turn back. I don’t stop.

I run, flying through the trees. But the pain doesn’t fade. I can’t leave it behind. It follows me still. And in a fresh surge of anguish I realize it always will.

I stop, silent tears streaming hot tracks down my cheeks. I sway for a moment before I drop, land on my knees. With a keening sob, I bow at the waist and retch, emptying the contents of my stomach. When there’s nothing left inside me, I curl into a tight ball on the ground. Twigs and pine needles scratch at every exposed inch of me, but I don’t have the energy to care.

Now I know. I finally know. After all this time. Dad is dead. Betrayed by someone from the pride. Someone I’ve lived with for years.

Leaves rustle near me as Tamra steps into view, like a wraith materializing from nothing. Her chest heaves from her race through the woods. Her hair floats in a wild nimbus of silvery white around her. Our gazes lock as we share in the knowledge, the truth of what happened to Dad. Her frosty gaze gleams wet across the few feet separating us.

“Tamra,” I whisper, her name crumbling from me.

Her face is stricken, the perfect reflection of what I’m feeling. She nods jerkily, words unnecessary between us. We’re living the same nightmare right now.

In an instant we’re hugging each other. Weeping like little girls. I wipe at my runny nose.

“I guess I always hoped he might be alive,” I say between sobbing gasps.

“I know. Me too.” She nods doggedly. “Mom. I want Mom.” Her voice breaks and she’s crying again.