Hidden Darkness (Hidden Saga Book 4) (17 page)

I didn’t wait for morning to leave. I cut out of the wedding party not long after dinner ended. Not that I wasn’t
happy
for the happy couple. I was. I just didn’t belong there—not really.

And they certainly didn’t need my help to celebrate the occasion. They didn’t need me for anything. They were surrounded by family and friends. I’d played my role, righted the wrong I’d done to Lad and Ryann, and now it was time for me to go.

              I wasn’t any more certain of my direction tonight than I’d been yesterday when I’d ended up at the top of an electrical tower. This time, though, I wouldn’t be seeking to end my life but begin a whole new one. I had no home, no family, no people, but at least I had finally been true to myself.

For the first time in a long time, I didn’t dread catching a glimpse of myself in the car mirror. And maybe Asher had been right after all—maybe it wasn’t too late for me.

              After hurriedly packing my belongings, I left Altum and walked to my car. Nosing it out onto the rural route that ran nearest the hidden underground kingdom, I looked one way and then the other. Eenie meenie miney moe.

North. Sure, why not?
Having made my choice, I drove past the Deep River city limit sign. Taking the northern route meant driving through the small town, but this time, I did not park at the grocery or cruise the Sonic, looking for a big red pickup truck.

I actually hoped I
wouldn’t
see him. Out of sight, out of mind was the best policy when you were tempted to want something you would never have. Seeking him out to say goodbye would be like putting a plate of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies on the kitchen island while trying to stick to a diet.

It was early evening anyway—he’d probably be at football practice or having dinner, or maybe on a date. That thought curdled in my brain and produced an unpleasant clench in my chest.
It doesn’t matter, Ava. He’s not for you. There is no one for you.

I drove past the darkened storefronts on Main Street, the graceful, column-fronted library, the railroad museum. Waiting at one of the town’s three stoplights, I stared up at the steeple of a huge brick church, wondering what it must be like inside, sitting in the filtered light of those tall, multi-hued windows.

Something slammed into my car from the passenger side—the force snapped my head back and caused my seatbelt to compress my chest like a vise as the car rocked onto two wheels then fell back to the ground with a shivering thud. I looked around.

No—wait—there’s no car. What hit me? What’s happening?

The panicked thoughts raced through my mind even as another powerful impact flipped my car. As if tossed by a giant hand, it rolled over and over before coming to a stop on its roof in the middle of the intersection.

I hung upside down from my seatbelt, ears ringing, staring at the contents of my purse, which now decorated the interior of the car’s roof.

And then I saw the fire.  

Lad and I walked hand in hand through the dark woods. Once we’d cleared the palace doors, his pace had slowed—thankfully. My heart rate, however, was even faster than before.

              I wasn’t afraid of the woods, or what might be in them that my human eyes couldn’t detect. Lad was with me.
He
was the reason for my crazy-fast pulse.

The beginning of the forest path was lined with hanging lanterns, candles in glass jars suspended from the tree branches at regular intervals on either side, much like the ones that had adorned the aisle during our wedding. Stars lit the night sky in glimpses where the canopy of treetops broke here and there.

The light breeze was fresh with the fragrances of pine and wildflowers, and the crickets and frogs and cicadas sang their nocturnal ballad, accompanied by the occasional call of a whip-poor-will. The woods had never seemed so magical—or so romantic.

I glanced up at Lad’s candlelit face. He wore a serene smile, ripe with the promise of things to come.

“When were these lights put up?” I asked.

              “I may have been a
bit
of a slave driver today.” Lad winced, but his sheepish grin told me he wasn’t sorry at all. “I’ll give the servants a few extra days off to compensate when we go on our honeymoon.”

              Honeymoon. We were
married.
It was like a dream.

              “And when will that be?” Since our wedding had been unexpectedly moved up, I wasn’t sure quite what was happening with our planned trip.

              “During your winter break, just as we planned. You have school, and we have to wait for Nox and Vancia to complete their world tour.”

              “Right.”

              “But that doesn’t mean we can’t start the honeymoon here at home,” he said. “I’d like for you to move in with me as soon as possible.”

              “Yes. Yes, I will. I’ll pack my things tomorrow.” My heart thumped hard in my chest. As far as I was concerned, the honeymoon started tonight. I didn’t care
where
we were—all that mattered was we’d finally be together. We’d finally be bonded.

As we neared his special tree, deep in the forest, I saw the first of the surprises Lad had planned for me. Fireflies decorated its branches, dotting the leaves all around the treetop hideaway, making it look like the nest itself was glowing.

              “No wonder you told me to change out of my wedding dress,” I said over my shoulder, beginning to climb with Lad close behind me.

              “That’s not the only reason,” he murmured. “I was ready to tear it off of you all evening—I didn’t want to lose control and have our long-awaited bonding take place in the first closet we came to leaving the palace.”

              My laugh sounded high and nervous. My hands were shaking, though I had no fear of falling—Lad would never let me fall. He had my back in every possible meaning of the phrase.

He was about to have
all
of me, and that thought made me more nervous than I would have believed. I had longed for this moment for ages, it seemed. Now that it was here, I was acutely conscious of the fact that I had no flipping idea what I was doing.

              As I touched the edge of the nest, the fireflies lifted and moved higher up into the branches, so only their tiny intermittent lights were still visible, a luminous canopy over our heads, prettier and far more magical than electrical twinkle lights could ever be.

              I rolled into the nest, surprised to find it felt different from before. It was lined completely with the softest white fabric, which seemed to be stuffed with down or something similar. It was like lying in a cloud.

              “You like it?” Lad beamed at me, following me in and falling back into the luxurious bedding. “We have pillows, too.” He dragged a plushy white pillow from the side of the nest and plumped it, inviting me to try it out.

              I lay back on it, sighing in pleasure. “So this is what you were so busy putting the finishing touches on today. It’s perfect Lad—really—I couldn’t imagine anything better.”

              He grinned, obviously thrilled at my approval. “I’m not finished. I have something for you.”

              Setting another pillow aside, he drew the delicate origami box from its hiding place. I felt almost guilty I’d seen it already. Almost. Knowing he’d made it for me and carved those precious words into it had kept a spark of hope alive in my heart during some very dark times recently.

              Pulling the delicate folds apart, I drew out the exquisite carving and turned it in my fingers, appreciating all over again the love and labor—and precious memories—that had gone into making it. “It’s incredible,” I whispered. I read the inscription again, and just like before, got a little choked up. My heart literally ached with the weight of the love I had for him.

              My voice was raspy when I told him, “I have something for you, too.”

              His eyes flared with delighted surprise as I pulled a small velvet bag from my pocket where I’d stashed it after changing clothes. Suddenly, it didn’t seem like enough—not compared to his wonderful gift. But then nothing would ever be enough to express how much I loved him, how happy I was to be his bond-mate.

Shyly, I lay the bag on Lad’s open palm. He widened the drawstring opening with a finger and then turned the bag over, pouring out its contents. A single shiny stone dropped into his large hand.

              “It’s from our secret pool,” I said. “I found it on the bottom. I’ve been keeping it in my room—even when we broke up I couldn’t bear to get rid of it—it was my memento of you and our special place. A couple weeks ago I took it to the jeweler on Main Street. He looked at me like I was crazy—I know it doesn’t hold any actual monetary value—but he agreed to polish it and drill a hole through the middle. I thought you could add it to your necklace.”

              Lad immediately reached behind his neck and unclasped the leather cord he wore. He slipped off the other stones and replaced them with the one I’d given him then put it back on. He lay his hand over it, pressing it against his bare skin.

“This is the only one I need—the only one that means something. I love it. I love you. I’m the luckiest guy in the world—in two worlds, actually.”

              “No. I’m the lucky one.” I stretched up to kiss him, and he kissed me back with enthusiasm, but then he pulled away again. Before I could get in a word of complaint, he held up a finger. 

“I have one more gift for you.” Crawling across the nest to the ancient chest, he drew out the aeflute that normally resided in his room—the one he’d played for me so long ago when he’d first taken me back to Altum as a child. That tune had lingered in my mind all my life, playing through my dreams and fragments of memories of that mystical long-ago night.

              “Oooh. Mood music,” I joked. But as Lad began strumming, my amusement faded.

The melody was achingly beautiful, tender and enchanting like something you’d
only
hear in a dream. And then he sang for me for the first time ever.

The words were so personal, so filled with love, I was crying by the end of the first verse. And his voice—no sound had ever touched my heart like this. I had thought Nox’s voice was magnificent. If Lad had been born a Dark Elf, there wouldn’t have been a mansion large enough to hold the fan pod he would have amassed. His singing was so alluring there was no way to adequately describe it.

The song ended, and I went up on my knees and reached for him. He set the instrument aside and moved closer, allowing me to touch his face.

“That was… why have you never sung for me before?”

“Remember what I said when you asked me before why I wouldn’t sing for you?”

“Sort of. Something about me stalking you forever—no I’m kidding. You said you didn’t want to unfairly influence me.”

“That’s right. I wanted you to love me for
me
, not for any Elven advantage I might have.”

I stared at him, wide-eyed with astonishment. “Does that mean you have musical glamour as well as leadership?”

“It means,” he murmured, dusting my face with light kisses as he wrapped his arms tightly around me, “I have
all sorts
of skills you have yet to discover.”

My stomach flipped at his words and suggestive tone. Then Lad rocked me back and pressed me into the soft cloud-like bedding. I gasped at the rightness of the feeling. The weight of him over me, his heat all around me was so good, I thought I might actually swoon—or whatever the lying down version of that would be called.

“I am so ready to make you mine,” Lad whispered against my cheekbone, and I knew it was true. The unmistakable response of his body to mine backed up his words, and if that wasn’t enough evidence, my emotional glamour was brimming and spilling over with his desire. He was about to burst into flames.

I was too. My craving for him was so overwhelming, all I could do was nod in fervent agreement as his hot lips worked their way to my ear, my jaw, my neck. He concentrated his attention there while his hands roamed and teased me until I could no longer keep still. My breaths were coming in short pants, my nerve endings in flames, hips lifting against him in an urgent plea.

“My beautiful girl,” he whispered. “Let me see you.”

He slid the straps of my dress from my shoulders and set to work on the tiny buttons that held the front together. There were too many of them. It was taking too long.

“Hurry,” I whispered.

Lad smiled, actually
slowing down
, and began kissing me between each button, prolonging the torture.

“Please… go faster,” I urged him.

His low laugh curled my toes. “We’ve waited all this time—I’m not going to rush through it now. I want to savor you.”

“What if someone comes? What if something happens to stop us?”

His expression got deadly serious, his tone low and chill-inducing. “Nothing and no one is going to stop us—do you hear me? Someone could come and chop the tree down, light it on fire, and I won’t stop. I’ve wanted you too much for too long. This is going to happen. Now relax and let me take care of you.”

I sighed in defeat and also in pleasure, watching him unbutton and kiss his way down the center of my chest. When he’d finally undone the last one, he peeled the fabric away from my body and stopped, staring. His expression was worshipful. His pulse was racing like I’d never felt it before.

“You are too beautiful,” he whispered as his fingers stroked my exposed skin.

The pleasure of his touch was so acute I could barely speak. My voice was a husky whisper. “Lad—I need you. Now. Please.”

He made a hoarse sound that was somewhere between excitement and pain. Apparently my wait was over. He drew the dress the rest of the way down my body then stood to remove his own shirt and pants.

I’d seen him shirtless many times, of course, but we’d never been completely unclothed together before. His body in the light of the moon and the firefly glow was almost unreal—even more perfect than I’d imagined. The magnificent chest, arms, and abs I knew so well were matched by powerful legs and hard masculine muscle everywhere I looked. His tan skin gleamed like polished bronze in the muted light.

I was dying to touch it, to feel him all over. And for him to touch me everywhere. My skin was fire-hot and exquisitely sensitive. All my nerve endings were awake and tuned to Lad as I waited for him to settle that long, beautiful body over me, for the intimate contact I’d been so eagerly anticipating all these torturous months. 

A fiery glow lit his eyes, sparking every part of my body and mind to full attention. “No more waiting,” he whispered as he lowered himself over me, bringing our bodies into perfect alignment.

After that there were no more words.

The vows we’d spoken during the ceremony tonight—some aloud, some mind-to-mind—had joined our families, our futures, even our hearts. But as our bodies joined and became one for the first time, I discovered there was another way to make a promise, and it required no words at all. 

*     *     *

We lay together, our breathing gradually slowing. One of my legs was thrown bonelessly across his body. My head rested on his chest right over that inhumanly fast heartbeat.

             
That heart belongs to me now. Forever.

“You know… people talk about ‘losing’ your virginity. But I don’t feel like I’ve lost anything,” I said. “I feel like I’ve… gained something.”

              Lad chuckled. “You have—your very own sex slave who’s going to follow you around day and night begging for your very special attention.”

I smiled at that, and one of his big hands cupped my head, his fingers playing in my hair. He lifted a bit to see my face.

              “Now you see why we can only bond with one person for eternity.”

              “Yes,” I whispered. “It’s like we’re the same now—I mean—it’s difficult to express. I feel different… like you’re a part of me that could never be removed, like you’ve
always
been… or something.” It really was impossible to put into words. All I knew was that I’d been changed—and that our love never would.