Yeah, this was a great idea.
A great idea that she couldn’t quite let go of.
Seven hours and sixteen minutes later, Allie, Gavin and Lydia landed in Boston. Lydia, bless her heart, curled up in the backseat of the rental car and went back to sleep. Or pretended to anyway.
Gavin insisted on paying for the car and then driving. Every mile they traveled closer seemed to wind them both tighter.
When Allie had pulled her wallet out to pay for the fast food they picked up, he’d snapped, “Let me do it.”
“You don’t have to do everything,” she’d snapped back.
“Let me at least fucking do what I can,” he’d said, with a scowl at the girl in the drive-through.
“What’s that mean?” Allie had demanded.
“It means that I don’t know what the hell’s gonna happen in Promise Harbor so I’m gonna at least pay for the damned burgers.”
Okay, clearly she wasn’t the only one feeling anxious about what was coming.
They pulled into Promise Harbor an hour later.
“You need to find a place to stay,” she said to Gavin as they passed the sign that said
Welcome to Promise Harbor
.
He didn’t answer and was frowning again—or still—when she looked over at him.
“You can’t stay at my house.” Surely he understood that.
“Fine.” The word was flat and delivered with a deeper frown.
“Well, really, what did you think?” she asked, exasperated and knowing that it wasn’t all about Gavin.
“I didn’t think about it period.” Same flat tone.
“I can’t bring you to my dad’s,” she pointed out. “For one, he barely knows you.” In fact, she wasn’t sure her dad knew him at all beyond his name. “For another…” Shit, she couldn’t say that. She bit her lip.
“For another?” he asked, glancing over at her.
“Nothing.”
“Allie,” he said warningly.
“Never mind. It’s my dad’s house and I can’t just bring some guy to stay.”
“What,” he bit off, “were you going to say?”
She sighed. Fine. “Josh will be around.”
Gavin growled. Her eyes widened.
But it was true. She couldn’t really bring the guy who’d broken up their wedding home to stay right in front of everyone, could she?
“Well, he will.”
“You sure? Thought he was out of town,” Gavin sneered.
“He was,” she acknowledged. “But he’s back.”
“Great.” Gavin’s tone was even more clipped, if that was possible.
“So you’ll stay—”
“Jesus, Allie, I’ll stay out of precious Josh’s fuckin’ way, okay?”
She glared at him. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Wasn’t it?”
She opened her mouth, shut it, then said, “I just don’t want to rub his nose in it.”
“I do,” Gavin muttered.
She huffed out a breath. This was a ridiculous fight. “You don’t have to be jealous of Josh.”
Josh wasn’t going to be the man she needed to concentrate on.
But neither was Gavin.
“I’m not jealous of Josh,” Gavin said firmly. “You’re in love with me and in my bed. I’m not worried about Josh.”
His words made her heart trip even as her frustration bubbled higher. “I’m not in your bed right now.” That was the least of the things she needed to worry about. Even if staying cocooned in bed with Gavin, shutting the real world out, sounded absolutely perfect. And so familiar.
They’d done that as a substitute for a real relationship for so long that now they were jumping in without any practice.
Now it was sink or swim.
He looked over at her, his expression full of challenge and possession. “You
are
in my bed right now, Allison. In every way that it matters, you are.”
Okay, so figuratively that was true.
She swallowed, liking that more than she should. It was all a moot point right now anyway.
Except that it wasn’t.
There was something about knowing that no matter how bitchy or unreasonable or unfocused she was, he still wanted her, still knew she was his. That made her breathe easier.
He reached across the seat and took her hand. “Listen, this is new for us. But here’s the deal. In the past, I let you leave, let you deal with all of this alone. That’s over. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I’m going to be there.”
She liked that a lot too. “Be where?”
“
There
,” he said again. “I don’t know. Wherever I need to be.”
That sounded really nice. She didn’t know where she needed him to be either, but knowing he was willing was…nice.
Josh had always been there. He’d taken a lot of weight off her shoulders, but this felt different. Bigger. For Josh it was natural and he barely gave it a second thought. In fact, she wasn’t sure he gave it any real thought. He just did it. He’d take her dad for coffee, or give Danny twenty bucks, or ride Charlie about his latest resignation. But it wasn’t a big deal.
For Gavin it was. This wasn’t natural for him. This wasn’t easy. In fact, he looked pretty damned uncomfortable thinking about it. But he was here, doing it anyway.
She squeezed his hand. “Okay.”
He glanced over quickly. “Okay? As in, you’ll call me if you need something?”
She thought about that, then slowly nodded. “Okay.”
That wasn’t natural for her either. She just took care of things. Except for the things Josh took care of. But she never really asked him. She didn’t need to, and she’d always chalked that up to proof of what a good match they were—he knew how to help her without her asking.
But…she wasn’t sure she would have asked him. Leaning wasn’t easy for her. She would have worried about what he’d think if she couldn’t handle something.
With Gavin she didn’t. Gavin would like her—love her—even if she broke down sobbing for no apparent reason. Or stayed in bed for three days straight.
She sighed. No, she didn’t need to worry about seeming weak or Gavin seeing her at her worst.
Been there, done that.
Gavin pulled the car up to the curb in front of a big old house at the end of the dead-end street next to the lake.
It wasn’t his parents’ place.
“Who lives here?”
“Hayley. This was her grandfather’s place. She owns it now.”
Allie was so grateful he had somewhere to go. “Does she know you’re coming?”
“Nah, but it won’t matter.” Gavin put the car into park and turned to look back at Lydia. “Lyd. We’re here.”
As Lydia was yawning and stretching, Gavin turned his attention fully on Allie.
“You will call me,” he said firmly. “I might suck at this at first, but you will call me and give me a chance. And I’ll get better at it.”
Something warm spread through her chest, and she felt the vise that had been squeezing her heart loosen. She smiled. “A chance at what?” she teased lightly. She actually really appreciated his honesty about not knowing what he was doing exactly.
The bumbling attempt outside his comfort zone meant more than all the perfect words and actions from everyone else in the past two years.
“The chance to be there,” he said with a little grimace.
“And ‘there’ is…?” she prompted.
“Hell if I know.” He gave her a half smile. “We might both need to work up to the big stuff. You don’t ask for help well and I don’t give it well.”
She smiled. “I’ll try.”
“Like changing a lightbulb, or something,” he said. “Or running to the grocery store for something you forgot.”
Her smile grew and she nodded. “Okay. When a lightbulb goes out or I run out of milk, you’re my guy.”
He leaned in and rested his forehead against hers. “I’m your guy anyway, Al,” he said huskily. “Any time for anything. Promise.”
“I promise,” she said softly. “But you have to promise not to get all upset or offended if I
don’t
call too. I have…stuff to figure out.”
“You need to talk to Josh,” he interpreted. With a sigh, he leaned back.
She nodded. “I do. I need to figure out what’s going on. And I just think maybe it would be best if you weren’t there. At least at first.”
He just looked at her for three heartbeats. Then he leaned in and kissed her sweetly.
Lydia slamming the door as she got out pulled them apart.
“I will see you,” he said, firmly.
She nodded.
Allie watched them lug their suitcases up to the door and Gavin pound on the door. Then wait. Then pound again. It was just barely six a.m., so it was understandable that it might take Hayley some time to wake up and get to the door.
Allie just hoped Hayley was a morning person and didn’t Taser people who showed up uninvited.
Finally the big door swung open. There was a moment when Allie couldn’t see anyone else before suddenly Gavin caught Hayley in his arms in a tight hug. Allie swallowed hard and put the car in drive. Thank god for Hayley. She’d take care of Gavin until Allie could.
She turned the car toward the Promise Harbor fire station and speed-dialed the sixth number in her cell phone, hoping Josh was at work. She’d be less likely to use expletives if there were other people around.
He wasn’t there. And no one—predictably—answered at Sophie’s or at Allie’s dad’s house.
Five minutes later, Allie pulled the rental up in front of the house that would have been her address if Gavin had been ten minutes later in getting to the church.
She shivered at that thought—how close she’d come to making such a huge mistake. Then she put that in the maybe-I’ll-think-about-that-later box—which was getting damned full of stuff, frankly.
Instead, she got out and headed for Josh’s front door, hoping he was home. It was Wednesday, so if he wasn’t at work, typically he’d be at his mom’s for breakfast. But his mom wasn’t in Promise Harbor.
She was
gone
. With Allie’s
father
.
The world was going crazy.
Allie pounded on Josh’s door for a full minute, but there was no answer and she had to accept that this wasn’t going to be as easy as she’d hoped.
She had Greta’s cell number. She supposed she could try to get a hold of her. What would Greta think about Sophie and Owen getting it on?
Allie frowned and dropped onto Josh’s top front step.
Sophie and Owen? Getting it on?
She made herself breathe. They could just be antiquing, she supposed. Maybe they just both needed to get away. They were friends, after all, and they’d both had a child starring in the Wedding That Wasn’t. Maybe they were just drinking mai tais and shopping.
And maybe they were getting it on.
“Argh!” Allie covered her face with her hands, propping her elbows on her knees. It was true that not knowing was the hard part.
She didn’t really care if they were involved, she realized. She loved Sophie and neither of them should be alone. They’d known each other forever.
Good for them.
But she’d like to know what the
hell
was going on.
Was Owen okay? Was Sophie reminding him to take his blood pressure meds and to watch his salt intake? Did she know that he was allergic to mangos?
More, did she know that he watched NCIS nonstop? And that he’d tell her about the same story he’d read in the newspaper three or four times? And that she’d have to physically take him to get his haircut or he’d never remember?
Yeah, there was more to being involved with Owen than Sophie might realize.
He might drive her nuts.
This little getaway might be the first and last.
Allie looked up at the sound of a car pulling in to Josh’s driveway. Josh got out a moment later. Then the passenger side opened. And Devon Grant stepped out.
Allie got to her feet.
Um…
“Allie, Jesus, I went to your dad’s. What are you doing
here
?” Josh asked, rounding the car and coming toward her.
He didn’t seem surprised to see her, exactly. “Why’d you go to my dad’s? He’s not there.” She put her hands on her hips. “Did you know he was with your mom?”
Josh stopped at the bottom of the steps. “Gavin told me you were back and needed me. What’s going on?”
That tripped her up. “Gavin told you I was here? And
needed
you?”
“Yes. What’s going on?”
“What’s going on?” She stomped down the steps. “My father is
gone
. And you weren’t here.
I’m
the one who needs to know what’s going on.”
“Mom and Owen went up to Greenbush Island for a few days. Everyone’s fine.”
Allie waited for him to continue. “
And
?” she finally demanded.
Josh frowned. “And nothing.”
“Did you talk to them?”
“I…” He cleared his throat and glanced over at Devon, who had come up beside him. “Briefly on the phone. I just got back Saturday. We just missed them.”