Authors: J.W. Phillips
“You’re right ... I didn’t like it,” he
whispered. The tears overflowed her eyes and down her cheeks.
“Angel, like is not enough to describe how I feel about that kiss
and you.” He kissed her cheeks to wipe the tears away. “I don’t
even know if love is.”
“Kind of like my curtains?”
“Oh, my sweet angel, I would love to get
lost in your kisses.” He pressed his forehead against hers, her
eyes closed, her breathing erratic. “I would love to get lost in
you forever.”
Julie’s eyes flicked open, her gaze hypnotic
as he gently kissed the tip of her nose. He didn’t mean to hurt
her. He had to learn how to treat her. He had never cared who he
hurt; now her tears ripped at him. “Angel, if you only knew what
pleasure I want to bring to you.”
Her eyes closed. Trucker easily saw how much
those words tore at her. Her eyes popped open, her head tilted as
she studied him. “Trucker, can I ask you a question?”
“Any,” he said then stopped himself. “What
question?”
“Have you ever, you know, made love?” The
heat raced to her face as she asked him. He reached for her cheek,
to feel the warmth from the blood pooling in them.
“No,” he answered.
“You’re still . . . you know . . . you’ve
never been with a girl?” She rolled her eyes at him. No matter what
she believed, he hadn’t lied. There was only one girl he could ever
classify in the love department and he was just lucky enough to
steal a kiss from her.
“That’s not what you ask me,” he clarified.
“Yes, I’ve fucked plenty of girls, but there is a difference
between love and gratification.” He picked up a tiny rock. Throwing
it at the pond, he watched it skip across the water.
“Which was that kiss?” she asked,
timidly.
“Both, but mostly love.” He ran his hand
down her arm, and laced his fingers through hers. “Julie, you’re
the first girl I ever cared about, I promise you that. I know
you’re not ready but when you are, I promise you, I’ll been there
and will make it a night you’ll never forget.” He lightly kissed
the back of her hand.
Julie’s jaw dropped onto her chest as she
glanced away and turned bright red. Damn, he loved how her skin
flamed. As much as that shy and innocent look turned him on, he was
relieved when she hugged her middle as her stomach growled.
“Come on, let’s eat, then we’ll meet up with
whoever,” he said.
“You tell me you fucked hundreds of girls,
and you’re worried about carrying me eating. I won’t jump in bed
with you so easy.”
“I don’t expect you to do anything. Yes,
I’ve done things I’d hate to clutter your mind with, but Angel,
you’re not some random girl. You are the one I want to take care
of.”
They walked back to his car in complete
silence, Trucker’s mind going over all the horrible things in his
past. Holding the car door open for her, he asked, “Was your first
kiss everything you wanted it to be?”
“More,” she answered as he slid in beside
her.
“I wish it was my first kiss too,” he
confessed, staring out the windshield. Nothing he had ever
experienced in his life could touch how she made him feel. She
reached over to hold his hand, but he jerked away. He slammed his
fist onto the steering wheel. How could he take that delicate hand
in his? All he could do was hurt her.
“You deserve better than me.” He leaned on
the door and rammed his head onto the glass. Julie jumped. “I’ve
done some horrible things and treated people horrendously . . .
I’ve used women for my own pleasure.”
“Are you using me now?” She trembled.
“No. Never.” He shook his head. “I’d never
use you. You’re everything to me.” He pulled her close to him and
placed his lips on her forehead. He held his lips there breathing
her in. “You’re so good, and I’m nothing but a dark soul,” he spoke
softly against her skin.
“Will you hurt me?” she clarified. He felt
her breathing getting harder, her shoulders moved with each intake
of air.
“I can’t.” He pulled away, but bored his
eyes into her. “Baby, I can’t, but my family might.”
“Will they?” she asked, her teeth slid
across her lip.
“I don’t know.” He shrugged his shoulder.
“Please don’t bite your lip.”
“I want take any bull crap from you or your
damn family.” She twisted her fingers around a string hanging from
her shorts.
“You sure as hell won’t. I would hurt anyone
that tired.” His glare seared through her.
Julie glanced up and their eyes locked. The
biggest and brightest green eyes he had ever seen. It rattled him,
how much affection they held for him.
“Then I don’t care,” she whispered.
She reached out for his hand as he reached
for hers. He pulled her hand up to his mouth and grazed his lips
over them.
As quick as his car could go to ninety from
nothing, so did his mood. Driving slowly through town he shifted
from sulking to cheerful. He switched on the sound systems. The
music of Journey filled the car.
“That’s different,” Julie stated.
“My music taste runs the gamut. Depends on
my mood.”
“And your mood now?”
“Oh, Miss Emison, wouldn’t you like to
know?” he said with a wink.
His lips curled up and a dimple appeared.
She went to stroke the side of his cheek with her pinky. Twisting
around, he caught her finger with his mouth and after a quick and
playful nip, he planted a kiss on its tip. Shaking her finger, she
took in a gulp of air. He had never wanted anything as much as he
wanted her. He wanted to open her eyes up to a new world, but was
she ready for his?
“Julie, come here, baby,” he said softly. He
needed to feel her close to him. She turned, nudged her nose
against his, and kissed him softly on the cheek.
“Do you really want to go?” she asked.
“With you?”
“Not with just me, but with Tiffany and Tori
too?”
“Do you want me to go?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Then it doesn’t matter what I want.”
Julie giggled. He smiled. He had seen her
laugh a million times with her friends, but it was the first time
she’d laughed for him.
“That’s a beautiful sound.”
“What?” she asked
“Your laughter.”
Trucker glanced at Julie. His mouth twitched
slightly, showing a faint trace of a dimple. Julie reached over and
stroked around it. He flinched. Not anticipating her touch, the
jolt of pain was too much.
“Are you okay?” she asked. She looked hurt
for a whole second before the redness crept back across her
cheeks.
He shuddered and counted to ten to compose
himself. “Yeah, you just shocked me.”
He hated putting that look on her face. But
what was he to say? The touch of a human stings especially
yours.
Trucker heard a faint rumble come from
Julie’s stomach. “Looks like I need to feed you,” he said,
happily.
Anything to get her mind on something other
than his reaction to her touch. By the way her eyes held that
quizzical look, Trucker was sure she was going through a list of
possibilities in her head at what would make a grown man jump in
pain at a simple swipe of her hand.
`“I’m hungry, but I have to meet up with
Tori and Tiff.” Julie started chewing on her nails and stared out
the windshield.
“Call them and I’ll take you all three out
to my favorite restaurant.”
*******
Julie let her teeth glide over her lip when
Trucker reached over and ran a finger down her cheek to her chin.
“Do you have any idea how much I want you. How much I think about
you. How much I dream of you.” He paused and flicked his thumb over
her lip. “Please, quit biting your lip. I can’t take it. I couldn’t
take you hurting me.”
“Sorry,” she said, lowering her head and
hiding behind her hair.
She had so many questions to ask. Why did he
hate her lip biting so much? How could she possibly hurt him? Then
again maybe she could, the feel of her hand on his face seemed like
it tortured him. No, it was impossible that a loving touch hurt
anyone. The only person who was capable of hurting the other was
him. Telling her he cared than dumping her would cut her to the
core.
“Julie, daydreaming again?” he asked and
tried to laugh.
Not knowing what to say, she started texting
Tori. Tori and Tiffany didn’t even know she was seeing Trucker much
less that he was joining them for the night.
Hey girl?
Can I bring a tag along?
Sure, Who?
It is not that nerd from science
who won’t leave me alone?
I know you are friends with him
Any who, anybody but him.
No, not him, Julie thought to herself. Hold
your seat girl because you are going to freak.
No not him
It’s Trucker Castleman:)
OMG!!! OMG!!!! OMG!!!!
You have to be kidding me:):):):)
No, I’m with him right now.
He wants to take us out to eat
first. His treat.
Eat your heart out, Tori Phillips. You
are not the only one of us who can get a catch.
Julie glanced
over at Trucker. He was brooding and staring out the window. He
gradually slipped from the carefree Trucker into the dominant
Trucker. A shift he started once they hit the road leading outside
the city limits.
“Are you sure?” Julie asked. He nodded.
Trucker seemed oblivious. “If you really don’t want to go, I
understand. I’ll just tell them I was joking. After all, it’s
pretty innocent and lame. I’m sure you are used to more stimulating
fun.” Julie whispered, fighting back tears. Why else would he have
become unglued, if not because he didn’t want to go? Maybe he
didn’t want to be seen in public with her? It made sense; up to
that point they had stayed on back roads and in cotton fields.
Trucker’s mouth dropped open in surprise. His brows furrowed and
his eyes widened.
“Angel, one of my favorite things about you
is your sweet innocence. If I didn’t want to be with you I wouldn’t
be. I never do anything I don’t want to do.”
Julie felt the vibrating and heard the all
too familiar ding coming from her cellphone.
Really, OMG!!!
Where do you want to meet us?
Confused by Trucker’s sudden shift in
personality and most recent confession, she rolled her phone over
and over in her hands. How could somebody be so cold and hard and
at the same time be absolutely tee-totally charismatic and
devastatingly ravishing?
“Tell them to meet us at The Chop House,”
Trucker said, harshly. He never shifted his eyes from the
windshield.
“Trucker, we can’t afford that.”
“I can afford it.”
Julie’s dad had taken her mom to The Chop
House one year for their anniversary. Ellen still talked about it
and Dan laughingly said he was still paying for it. Julie had
always wanted to go. She had gone once with some friends, but was
told it would have been a three-hour wait. Now he wanted to carry
her. She might be selfish but she didn’t want him to carry her
friends too.
“The wait time is impossible there without a
reservation. Which we don’t have,” she pointed out.
“Not for me. My dad owns part of it and it’s
run by one of my best friend’s parents.” He still wouldn’t look at
her. Maybe he was tired of her arguing with him, but she really
didn’t want him carrying Tori and Tiffany to the nicest restaurant
in the state.
“Trucker, I don’t want them to go.” Even she
heard the whine to her voice.
He cut his eyes over to her. “Why?”
“Because . . . that is the restaurant I
always wanted someone to take me too. Just me and you.” Julie
turned her face to look out the door window, but with everything
flowing around her head, she didn’t see anything.
Great, now he
is going to think I’m a whiny baby.
He pulled the car over onto the side of the
road. The moon glowed an eerie orange casting a strange tinge over
his face. The look that flashed over his face the first day she met
him was sharp and blazing. He appeared to be turning into something
unworldly.
“Julie, I don’t do people. I haven’t been to
a movie in years because there is too many damn people there. I
hate going around large crowds, but I’ll do people for you. If you
want something just ask,” he said harshly.
“Can we just go to the movies?” She
hesitated and picked at her pant legs. “I really would like . . .
if you like . . . to go eat at The Chop House some other time.”
She couldn’t even glimpse at him. She
started to read the last few texts Tori had sent, waiting for a
response. Julie’s favorite and the one that almost made her laugh
was:
Quit smoking the hallucinogens.
What time are YOU
really meeting us?
She would have laughed too, if Trucker had
not started to stroke one finger back and forth over her jawline.
Clutching her chin, he jerked her head around.
“I would love to take just you there.” His
voice reverberated through her. She simply nodded and started
texting Tori.
I’ll see y’all at 7.
and I’ll get the tickets.
Julie had already figured out Trucker liked
to pay and loved to spoil. Money was a way to say he cared. She
inwardly smiled at the text too. She left out Trucker’s name on
purpose. It would be more fun to see Tori’s face when she first saw
them together.
“We’re meeting them at seven. I told them we
would get the tickets.”
“Thank you,” he mouthed.
******
Standing out in front of the theater,
Trucker drew her into an embrace, Julie’s back pressed into his
front, and he kissed her hair. “Stay close to me, please.”
Julie glanced up at him and smiled as he
kissed the tip of her nose. Directly after, a group from their math
class came up.