Hostile engagement (24 page)

`Did Rupert tell you he'd asked me to sell him back the ring when he gets his money from the sale of Brook House?'

`N-no,' Lucy replied, startled, a warm feeling flooding through her at Rupert's thought. Then, her tongue coming out to lick suddenly dry lips before she asked her question, `And did you agree to sell it back to him?' She tried to put just the right note of query into her voice, but a husky note merged with the aloof tone she had been aiming for.

`No, Lucy—I told your brother I had no intention of selling it.'

Lucy refused to say the 'Oh' that sprang to her lips, though it was a near thing. 'It's yours to do with what you wish,' she managed instead.

`Exactly, Lucy—I offered it to you with no strings attached once, do you remember?'

Would she ever forget, even now so many weeks afterwards what had followed was as vivid in her memory now as it had been then. 'Yes, I remember,' she said, amazed

that she could sound so cool when she was shaking inside. She knew her face was growing pink and hated that he should know she was not feeling as cool as she sounded.

`My offer is still open, Lucy,' Jud said, his eyes, having seen her blush, refusing to leave her face.

`You mean ...'

`I mean I would like you to have your ring, and I don't want payment for it from your brother.' He paused, then added deliberately, 'Or, Lucy, from you.'

The fact that Jud was now telling her as if he was saying it outright that he didn't fancy her had her pride coming to her aid. 'I apologise for doubting your motives that last time you offered to give me the ring,' she said, holding his eyes for the briefest of seconds before looking away again. 'I know now you want nothing from me in return, but I'm afraid I can't accept your offer.' And then because he was hurting her more than he knew by the cold way he sat opposite her, letting her know that the ring she valued so much, the money he had paid for it, meant nothing to him—as little, she faced it squarely, as she meant to him—and the only way she could keep her terrible hurt from showing was by resorting to sarcasm.

`I don't doubt there's someone somewhere who'll be pleased to pay for such an item in a way I couldn't bring myself to.' That was it, she'd managed just the right tone. She felt sure he couldn't avoid thinking now that if he didn't fancy her, he could be certain he was the last man in the world she would look at. She dared a hasty look at him for proof that he had understood her meaning, though he would have to be blind not to see it, she thought. She saw his jaw was clenched, and that he was looking back at her through narrowed eyes. She knew he didn't like what he had heard, but who did he think he was, to think he could say what he liked to her and get away with it? She thought he looked as though he was struggling to keep his temper, and though she knew the force of his rage was something

to be reckoned with, she didn't think she would come to very much harm while his mother was in the house.

`If you won't accept your ring back, Lucy, I can assure you I'll give it to no one else.' Jud's tone was harsh, confirming that his temper was pretty near to the surface.

`You think it's tainted now that I've worn it?' she jibed, hating to believe it, but hurt to her very soul, her pride refused to let him see he was ruthlessly cutting her heart out.

She was completely unprepared for Jud's reaction to her jibe. In a movement so swift she didn't see him coming he was out of his chair and hauling her to her feet, his hands gripping her shoulders in a racking hold as though he was using her to try to hang on to the last remnants of the control he had over his temper.

`By God, L
ucy Carey, you try me to the very limits !' he thundered, then while she was still looking at him with startled eyes, he pulled her roughly into his arms and brought his mouth down on hers in a kiss that was as brutal as it was passionate.

Responding to his kiss was out of the question. There was nothing persuasive about the hold he had on her, it was the grip of a man who had been brought to the end of his patience and was now mindless of any hurt he inflicted. Lucy struggled against him, her heart pounding with fear as he dragged the neck of her sweater away from her and his lips ravaged the column of her throat and neck. Pushing at him was useless and kicking at him brought her so off balance it provided Jud with the excuse he didn't need to hold her even closer.

let me go !' she yelled at him when she found her mouth free again and the breath to speak. 'Let me 'go, Jud, you swine !'

`Like hell,' he grated. 'You think you can say what the hell you like and get away with it, don't you-but there's a limit, my little virgin, and I've just reached mine,' and again he swooped on her mouth.

Oh God, she was scared ! Jud must have told his mother he would let her know when to come in, and Lucy guessed Mrs Hemming would think they were having a heart-to-heart talk and wouldn't interrupt them. She had dreamed of being kissed by Jud, of being held by him, but never like this. 'Please, Jud,' she cried, 'you're hurting me !' He was. She knew she would find bruises in a day or two's time, but it was the mental hurt he was inflicting that was the greater pain. The thought that when she had left Priors Channing, the memory of her last meeting with Jud would be that he was so uncaring of her he could treat her so.

Jud's hold on her held firm, and she knew he was going to ignore her pleas, then suddenly his body stilled, and with a cry that was half a groan he slackened his hold on her and he buried his face in her neck.

The groan Lucy heard sounded for all the world so full of remorse that all fear left her and knowing, with Jud's arms only loosely about her now, that escape would have been easy, she just couldn't find it in her to tear herself out of his arms to flee and leave him The hands that seconds earlier had been pummelling at his back in an endeavour to effect her release now closed about him, and she held him as he held her, and again Jud's body stiffened and he lifted his head to look down into the wide brown eyes that showed not fear now, but gentle regret that they would always be enemies.

`Gentle Lucy,' seemed to be dragged from him. 'You always were too soft for your own good,' and with that he lowered his head once more, only this time there was none of the rage or anger in his kiss, and at that first gentle touch Lucy knew she was lost. This was so much more what she wanted, her bruised lips parted, the hands at his back clenched once, then gave in and splayed against him, drawing him to her as he was drawing her.

Mindlessly she returned his kiss, made no objection this time when her sweater was pulled away from her throat and

his lips traced healing kisses where his lips had scorched before, then his mouth claimed hers once more, urgently, transmitting the same yearning urgency to her. She felt his hands at her waist, felt their warmth against her skin beneath her sweater, and her lips clung to his when his hands caressed in delicious movements to come to rest just beneath her breasts. Her breath seemed to halt as she waited, wanted his hands to continue on upwards, but it seemed as though Jud was awaiting her permission now to invade further the privacy of her body, and without thought her lips came fractionally away from his to murmur in an agony of waiting, 'Please, Jud,' in invitation for him to do with her what he would. A sigh of bliss escaped her when she felt his hands against her breasts and she pressed to him, wanting this moment to never end.

She was in complete agreement when he picked her up and carried her to the settee, and looking into his eyes she saw nothing of the coldness she remembered there, but a flame that was more green than grey, before she buried her head against him and felt his body taut beside her as the cushions moulded to their bodies.

Having invited Jud's caresses Lucy thought she was prepared to go wherever their delight took them, but when she felt the looseness of the jeans she was wearing and realised her zip must be undone, for all she hadn't felt Jud undoing it, her breath caught in her throat as choking realisation hit her when his hand began fondling movements around her navel, that now was the time to stop or ...

Her move to roll off the settee was instinctive, and once her body was away from him, cold, cruel sanity fought in her brain to be heard against the voice within her that insisted she returned to Jud on the settee.

Harsh sanity won, and with hands that were shaking the three-inch gap in her jeans was fastened with a jerky movement as she pulled up the zip. She had her back to Jud and didn't dare turn round as logic she didn't want to listen to

was hammering to be heard. Jud must be laughing his head off—Jud with all his experience had found the seduction of Lucy Carey child's play.

`There's no need to panic, Lucy,' she heard him say quietly behind her 'I wouldn't have ...'

`Wouldn't you?' she came back sharply, still not daring to turn as she straightened her sweater and looked round wildly for her bag. 'My God, it didn't look like it—child's play, wasn't it?' She knew she was going to break down any moment—oh, where was her bag—it had her car keys in it. She wanted to race out of here and now, but she would look a fine fool if she had to come back for her bag.

`You appear to have a fine opinion of me.' She heard an edge creeping into Jud's voice, but was uncaring of it. "About as fine as the opinion you have of me,' she snapped back. Then knowing her pride lay in ruins—oh, how Jud would laugh when she was gone-she made a vain attempt to get away from him with at least some of her pride salvaged. 'Well, don't worry about it, Jud Hemming —I promise you I won't—in a week or two we shall be out of each other's hair, and
if ever we think of—of what had
happened—or what nearly happened,' she amended hastily, still not knowing quite where she was, 'then we can both sit back and have a damn good laugh.

She jumped visibly to hear Jud's voice just over her shoulder; she hadn't heard him move from the settee. `Nothing nearly happened,' he bit in her ear. 'I was in control the whole time.'

She could have hit him for that remark, though he sounded so sincere she had to believe him, but it made her furious that in her innocence she had been floundering in the joy of his touch, his lovemaking, that only when it looked as if he would trespass on part of her that was intensely personal had she come down to earth. She had scant satisfaction that Jud wasn't so much in control as he would have her believe, for instead of putting his hands on her

again and turning her to face him, he ordered : 'Look at me, Lucy,' and frightened in case she was wrong and he would touch her again, Lucy turned to face him.

There was nothing about him now that remotely connected him with the lover he had been a few minutes ago. Nothing at all in his face to give her any indication of what he was feeling, thinking ...

`You've just said that shortly we'll be out of each other's hair,' Jud reminded her. 'Do I take it from that remark that you're going away for a while?'

A lot he cared ! She could tell he would be clapping his hands before the exhaust smoke of her departure had evaporated. 'Not for a while, Jud—I'm going away permanently.'

Jud didn't ask where, he seemed to accept her statement without difficulty, and yet-and yet, Lucy thought, she could have sworn his jaw clenched momentarily as though he was controlling some inner impulse. Imagination, of course; Jud's face was as impassive as ever when she looked again. She had just imagined seeing something she wanted to see. Wanting some sign that he was not unmoved to hear that he would never see her again, she had dreamed up a fleeting picture of Jud looking not as cool as he would have her believe.

Knowing there was absolutely nothing more for them to say to each other, Lucy spied her bag about two yards from her feet tucked in against the settee where it had been all the time, only she'd been too panic-stricken to dare turn to see it. She moved a step away from Jud, ready to make her departure, feeling suddenly dead inside.

`Don't go.'

The hoarse note in Jud's voice stopped her more than any words he could have said, and she half turned back to him, not daring to look at him lest he see how completely defeated she was. She thought she knew the reason for his words, though the way he said them was unexpected.

`I have to go,' she told him flatly, her eyes downcast making an unseeing survey of the floor. 'We've just proved the biological urge you spoke of-I'm not your girl for further sex exploration.'

`Damn the biological urge,' Jud snapped violently, causing Lucy's head to come up sharply. She expected to see little warmth in his eyes, but there was a raging light there he did nothing to hide. 'I don't want you to go—sex has got nothing to do with it.

Oh God, she thought, unable to believe Jud wanted nothing from her yet not understanding why he didn't want her to go. She had thought she was dead inside, yet all he had to do was look at her, tell her he didn't want her to go, even make it sound as if he meant it, and her heart was hammering within her. Her legs felt shaky and she had to look away from him before her brain would clear sufficiently for her to answer.

Y-you say s-sex has nothing to do-with your reason for wanting me to stay?' she queried, and looked at him again the words said.

She saw Jud hesitate. It was enough to have her determined to leave the room without saying another word, she didn't need him confirming slowly, 'Well, no. Don't misunderstand me, Lucy. Sex has its part in my reason for wanting you to stay, though I prefer to call it physical love ...' Lucy's action of going to pick up her handbag, her intention to leave before he could persuade her otherwise obvious, stopped him before he could complete what he was saying.