How to Give a Man Oral Sex Like a Pro (4 page)

Chapter Six

The Do NEVER Do’s and the Do ALWAYS Do’s

Even though I just went on a rant about how there are no rules associated with handjobs and blowjobs and even if there were, you would break them but I am about to partially take that back. Sometimes, we need a little reigning in and we need to get focused. We need to be told right from wrong before we do it so we aren’t suffering with too many consequences at the end when it is too late. With handjobs and blowjobs it’s hard to mess it up in the first place but just like with anything else, things can go wrong. Even though you are learning how to build up a skill set that will give your man pleasure that is out of this world, you may get caught up in the moment and want to do something that seems like a good idea at the time but you then realize, it should have never crossed your mind in the first place.

To avoid any awkward conversations or emergency room visits, here is a brief list of the Do NEVER Do’s of handjobs and blowjobs:

1. No raking
. This is an obvious one – don’t use your teeth during oral sex EVER! EVER NEVER, NEVER EVER! The skin is far too sensitive down in your man’s Netherlands and you never want to cause him pain when all you are trying to do is give him pleasure. Even though you may think lightly tracing your teeth on his shaft might bring him pleasure, there are so many other things that you can do to him that you know will bring him pleasure and that won’t even bring up the possibility of pain. Avoid using your teeth at all times and make sure that you are placing your lips overtop of them when you go down on him just to take extra precautions.

2. No gagging
. Although some women know how to perform the deep throat on their man during oral, not all women are pros. If you have any form of hesitation that allowing him to enter your mouth as far as he can go might cause you to gag, avoid it at all costs. Again, there are so many other things that you can do to your man with your mouth that will make gagging seem like child’s play. It is better to be safe than sorry so don’t feel like he is pressuring you to do something that you aren’t comfortable with. Stand your ground.

3. No scratching
. Sometimes, men like it rough and let’s face it, sometimes we all do. Scratching and biting on his back or neck during sex is awfully sexy but this is something you want to avoid during handjobs or blowjobs. Using your fingernails to lightly trace on his shaft or his testicles is a serious no-no. As with your teeth, you just can’t predict what might happen if you take things too far. Either cut those fingernails or use the soft pads on your fingers to tease him or tuck them away and use your palms only when stimulating him with your hands.

4. No repetition
. You know how during sex you get bored of the same position over and over again and how you eventually crave something different? The same goes for oral and for handjobs. If you want to keep your man interested and keep the pleasure coming for him, you have to change it up from time-to-time. You learned all about this earlier on how to add some versatility to your motions and what to do to keep him on his toes. Make sure that you are switching up the pressure, what you are using on him and the pace so you keep him interested and help to get him to climax even faster.

5. No kissing
. Now, this is only a rule in this section of this chapter because it is up for debate. Some men are okay with kissing after oral sex while others couldn’t be more grossed out by the idea. To figure out where your man stands, let him be the first to make the move. That way, you aren’t the one who has to tiptoe around this situation. If he grabs you after you finish with him and plants one on you, then you know how to play the situation out perfectly. If he doesn’t, then don’t be the one to go for it. I, however, always have a rule that if you are going down there and playing his penis like a fine violin, he should at least be able to give you a kiss after. You are the one putting your mouth on it and you should be rewarded. Plus, if you are okay with him kissing you after he goes down on you, the same rules should apply.

In addition to what you should NEVER do in terms of handjobs and blowjobs, there are also rules that your man should adhere to as well and they are as follows:

1. No thrusting
. Your man should never thrust himself into you when you are down there stimulating him with your mouth. You are the one who is in control at this moment, and not him. Even though he may feel like he is donning the power control, reassure him that you got this and that he should just lie back and enjoy the show. If he does start getting a little anxious, stop stimulating him with your mouth and just use your hand. If he creates a fuss, tell him how you feel but showing him that you will stop if he gets out of hand is a great way to teach him to lie still.

2. No hair pulling or pushing
. This is a given, just like with thrusting. You are in control in this moment so you need to be the one who has all of the power. He can hold your hair on the top of your head for you so it stays out of the way or run his fingers through your hair but as soon as he starts getting rough and manipulating your head to do things that you aren’t comfortable with, then it’s time to speak up. It’s natural for men to get rough and for them to want to have the power but that can’t be the case. He should be lucky enough that he has a beautiful woman willing to please him so remind him of that, subtly of course. If he isn’t good with subtly, then you might need to take things a step further and have a conversation with him about it. Your comfort is key so remember that. He can’t expect you to have a great time and to perform to your best if you feel under pressure. There has to be a compromise.

3. No forcing
. All of these topics tend to blend together but forcing is its own separate entity. If you are giving your man a handjob and that is where your comfort level lies for now, then he needs to respect that. He shouldn’t be trying to push his penis into your face or grabbing you by the head to push you onto him. Boundaries are important and must be respected at all times. If this means that you and your man have to have a chat together, then so be it. Make sure that you are being respected at all times.

4. No surprises
. This is just an etiquette rule that men should follow. Right when he is about to ejaculate, he should give you the heads up and let you know. That way, you can prepare yourself for however you feel comfortable. If swallowing is not an issue for you, then you can prepare yourself for that. If you aren’t big on it and you’d rather him ejaculate on himself or on you somewhere else, then you need to get ready for that too. There should be no surprises when it comes to oral, especially when he is ready to climax.

5. Hygiene
. This is an obvious one, but if your man wants you to go down on him and he isn’t taking care of himself down there, it is going to be awfully difficult for you to want to do that to him. Men can get really hairy and sweaty down there, making it an area that a lot of women don’t want to go near. He should have the knowledge and courtesy already to take care of his hygiene before he allows you down there but some men aren’t as thoughtful. This might be one of those situations where an awkward conversation is needed but just make sure that everything looks right before you put it in your mouth. If talking isn’t an option, then suggest showering together before you give him oral. This can double as a great foreplay tool as well.

Now that you both know what NEVER to do, it’s time that you remembered a few tricks that you should ALWAYS do in terms of handjobs and blowjobs. Here is a list of some of the things that you should always keep in mind so you can give your man the best pleasure possible:

1. Fully engage him
. This tip will be repetitive but I’m just trying to hammer it home for you. When you are giving him a handjob or a blowjob, make sure that you fully engage him. This doesn’t have to be limited to just how you touch him or where you touch him. Of course, it is best that you touch him all over, especially including the testicles, but this is more than that. To fully engage him is to have him completely enamored with you. You want him to taste you, to smell you, to look at you and to feel you. You want all of his senses to be all about you. There are many ways that you can do this such as dressing up sexy to give him something visual to look at, spray some delicious perfume to awaken his senses or you can go for the mother load and perform the 69 on each other. This involves you performing oral at him at the very same time he does it to you. The 69 is such a sexy way of you both getting some pleasure and it definitely fully engages him. He has to focus on your pleasure but at the same time, will be caught between feeling this intense sensation that you are giving to him.

2. Pull out all the stops
. When you are giving your man a handjob or a blowjob, go for the gold. Pulling out all of the stops means that you aren’t going to be afraid to maybe do some things that you might otherwise refrain from. You are going to allow your inhibitions to run wild and give him a real show. For the most part, this just means using everything you got to please him but if you are feeling extra adventurous and maybe a different way to get him off, here are a couple suggestions. For one, you can try giving him a boobjob, which means he thrusts himself between your two breasts. If your man is quite hung, you might even be able to give him a blowjob at the same time. Lie down on your back and have your man thrust himself between your breasts. It’s best to have them lubricated so it feels even more amazing. This is when the footjob suggestion might be perfect to use as well, as we previously touched upon it before. Just make sure those arches are lubed up.

3. Make noise
. Even though your mouth may be occupied with a blowjob, that doesn’t mean that you can’t still make some soft moans and groans. Not only does this show your man that you are truly enjoying yourself and that you love giving him pleasure, but it does something amazing for him as well. When you hum or moan, the vibrations from your mouth are sent cascading through his penis and eventually through his body. This gives him an extra form of stimulation that will send shivers down his spine.

4. Have fun
. The biggest rule of them all during handjobs, blowjobs, fingerjobs or whatever you two might get yourselves into, is to have fun. If you aren’t enjoying yourself, then he certainly will pick up on that negative energy and he won’t get any pleasure out of it. The more into it you are, the more into it he will be. This makes the connection between the two of you all the more special and stronger. Sex is fun so oral and hand play should be fun as well.

By keeping these NEVER do’s and ALWAYS do’s in the back of your mind, you are setting yourself up for constant success in terms of hand play and oral play. Even if your man starts getting a bit randy and wants you to maybe use your teeth, remember that it is never a good idea. Once you start doing something, you have to outdo yourself in the long run to get that same satisfaction and that is for a whole other topic on a whole different day. (BDSM, baby!)

As the final tip suggested, it is important to have fun. Sex and pleasing one another is a great time to bond and to get closer together. It is a pleasurable experience to give your man pleasure so by having fun with it, it means that you are doing it in the right way and it will better your relationship.

Chapter Seven

How to Master the Art of the Deep Throat

Alright handjob and blowjob professional, here it is; the moment that we all have been either waiting for or waiting to avoid. With a guide on how to give your man an amazing blowjob comes a topic that we have to discuss and that is the art of the deep throat. You now partially know how to give your man a blowjob akin to something out of the best porn you’ve seen but now you need to take it a step further; now it’s time that you really blew his mind.

Deep throating is a topic that might make a lot of women cringe. Some women just can’t keep a handle on their gag reflexes and the last thing they want to do is to ruin a great blowjob by not being able to keep their lunch down. Naturally, this is a cause for concern and the fact that the gag reflex does exist is enough to make women steer away from this sex act and rightfully so. It can be really nerve wracking being pushed to your limit and having absolutely no control over what happens next. However, it doesn’t have to be this way. There are ways of combating the gag reflex, teaching yourself how to get into the right mindset and even tips and tricks that you can use and buy that will help you to overcome this obstacle and give your man amazing pleasure. Even if you think that you are destined to fail and that it may be impossible for you to make this happen for your man and for yourself, give this chapter a read before you come to any conclusion. You can’t fail unless you give up so with this glimmering hope that you may have, let me corrupt you to the dark side and each you how you can master this art in no time at all.

The biggest tip to remember when attempting the deep throat is that you have to relax. The more tensed up you are, the more tensed up your entire body is making it extremely difficult for you to let go and to allow your throat muscles to relax. Of course, there is a natural tendency for us to stop anything from going down our throats that we don’t want there, so this is certainly a mind over matter situation that needs to be addressed. You have to get into the right frame of mind before you can even attempt any of these methods. Perhaps meditation might be a great way for you to learn how to calm your body down, especially your throat. Practicing meditation might help you out in a huge way. It’s worth a shot.

The next big tip is that practice makes perfect. The more you practice relaxing those throat muscles and accomplishing small goals, the easier and more natural this motion will come to you. Obviously, you don’t want to practice on your man just in case things don’t go as planned. Therefore, you are going to need a practicing tool and one that will act as close to the real thing as possible. Luckily, someone was brilliant enough back in the day that most of the foods that we eat are phallic in nature. For example, cucumbers, carrots, bananas and popsicles are all shaped like a Johnson so why not use one or all of these to practice the deep throat on? Perfect! Now you can grocery shop for your dinner and to practice deep throating. Again, before you try anything, remember to relax. This will be much easier when you are alone and there is no direct pressure from performing properly in front of anyone. Once you feel a bit more at ease, try slowly allowing the “tool” to ease down your throat. If you feel your body tensing up, back off and wait. Get back to your original state and then try again. You will find that you can go deeper each time once you start to work your throat muscles like a deep stretch. If at first you don’t succeed, maybe that day was not your day. Wait it out and try again in an hour or two or just wait for another day. You will get it. Promise.

For the women that are anxious and want to get things done, there are wonderful devices that you can use that will help you to achieve this goal much faster and the best part is, that they all help towards pleasing your man as well. If you can’t get your throat muscles to relax, the next best option is to numb them and this can be done in a number of ways. First of all, you can simply use ice to numb the back of your throat. On a hot summer day, try cooling your man off with some sexy ice cube play. Place a cube in your mouth and trace it all over his body, leaving a trail of chilly wetness wherever you touch. This acts as great foreplay as well. Then, as it gets smaller and smaller, swallow the ice cube and you will notice how cold your mouth feels. Then, you are prepped and ready for oral, and you will see just how numb the back of your throat is. This also numbs the back of the tongue and for most, any pressure on the back of the tongue translates into the gag reflex going off. All of that will be prevented with using an ice cube. The only downside is that your man might not enjoy your cool mouth at first but he will get used to it but that only means that your mouth will start to heat up and you will lose that numbness. You have to act fast with this tip.

Another trick that you can use is to purchase a tingling lubricant or another substance. There are tingling products on the market that work great for sex and even better for oral. They work by tingling or numbing the skin that they come in contact with. Now, you can numb your mouth without the cold and this will be something that your man will truly enjoy. Plus, the tingle sensation feels amazing for him and will definitely add to the stimulation. He will get even closer to orgasm with the tingling lubricant and the fact that you can go so far down on him only adds to the entire experience.

For the women who want to bypass all of this even further and find out about a way to master the deep throat that has never before been released, well, you are in luck. I have a tip that not too many women know about but trust me, it works. No matter how sensitive your gag reflex is, you can overcome it in a matter of seconds. Here it is:

1. Ball your left hand into a fist.

2. Squeeze the tip of your index finger and the tip of your thumb together as hard as you can.

3. Shove your right index finger down your throat.

4. Call all of your girlfriends and tell them the news.

5. Call your man and tell him you have a surprise for him tonight.

The cause of this is unknown but for some reason, this bypasses the gag reflex in the brain. There need be no further explanation than that – it works so do it. Tonight. Now. Go! Remember how I said you were going to be the best he has ever had or ever will have again? Well, sister, there is your answer! Now you have become the master of the deep throat in just a few short pages. Not as painful or scary as you once thought, hey?