Hurting To Feel (Carpool Dolls) (9 page)

His
gaze heated. "All you have to do is kiss me."

And,
she did.

As
if he supplied her next breath, she opened her mouth and kissed him. Relief
left her weak and when Nate picked her up, she wrapped her arms around his
neck, securing her to him.

She
lifted her mouth. "Don't get rid of me."

He
laid his cheek against hers. "Never. I promise."

It
was only with his word, she let the distress over what she'd agreed to go.
Excitement, trepidation and if she was honest, a small amount of reluctance
remained. Yet there was no denying if he hurt her while giving her everything,
it'd be worth the pain and suffering if he kept his promise and never walked
away from her.

Chapter
Ten

Nate
took control of the kiss after Addison offered herself to him. She moaned. Her
thoughts wandered over what had happened, but she couldn't categorize what
everything meant. Had she agreed to a relationship where he dominated
everything she did?

What
about Carpool Dolls? She grabbed his shirt, needing to find out what he
planned. Never, not in her lifetime, would she walk away from her girls.

She
pulled her head back. "Nate. W-we have to talk."

"Too
late." He laid her on the bed. "Afterward, we'll discuss what is
going on. Right now, I want deep inside of you."

He
pulled his shirt out of his trousers. She sat up on the bed. He went too fast
for her to figure out a way to slow him down.

"Isn't
there a safe word or something that you people use? What if I don't want to do
what you ask?" She scooted farther back on the bed.

He
paused. "I don't play games. No club scenes, no safe words, no compromise.
It's my way and you'll do what I ask of you."

"But
what if I don't want to?" She raised her chin, bringing her knees to her
chest. "I have to have a way to say no, or its rape."

He
growled. "It's not fucking rape when you want me to fuck you. I will make
sure you are enjoying yourself."

She
wrapped her arms around her legs, pulling her dress down to cover her calves.
"We need rules."

"No
rules." He planted his knee on the mattress, stretched toward her, and
grabbed her ankle. "I told you how it would be between us. I proved how I
knew you were the one, the only fucking way I know how. I don't take this lightly.
You are the one who gets to see the real me and you agreed."

Okay,
she did agree. "But, I—"

"I
will punish you if you want to argue instead of me shoving my cock inside of
you and making you come until you have no more questions left." He hovered
over her, and yanked up her dress. "Understand?"

Oh.
My. God. She nodded.

"Perfect."
He slid her panties down. "I've thought of nothing else but having my
mouth on you for days. Don't deny me what I want."

In
fascinated shock, she watched his head go down and the wet warmth of his tongue
settled between her legs. She fell back on the bed, paralyzed and quivering.

His
tongue thrust inside of her…in, out, in, out. She clutched at the bedspread,
afraid she'd come up off the bed and afraid she'd miss one touch of his amazing
mouth.

Pleasure
curled around her insides and spread out to warm her body. She moaned, wanting
to hold him, touch him, and knowing if she asked, she'd lose what he was doing
to her.

Nate
lifted his head, raining kisses on her sex. She reached for him, and encountered
his hair.

"Put
your hands out to the sides, doll." He moved up between her legs, taking
her dress with him until he told her to lift her head, and she slipped her arms
out of the material.

He
unhooked her bra and had her upper body naked in seconds. She moved to cover
her breasts, and he stopped her. His gaze heated, and she tightened her legs
around his thighs as he cupped the undersides of her breasts and lowered his
head to capture one of her hardened nipples in his mouth. She arched her back.
As if his mouth pulled pleasure from the center of her body, she writhed
underneath him wanting more.

"Nate…"

He
stopped, rising up onto his knees. "Nathan. I'm Nathan."

As
if saying the name ripped a hole in his armor, he braced above her, denying her
everything while he waited. She licked her lips and nodded. "Nathan,"
she whispered.

"Do
you need me to use a condom?" He unbuckled his belt. "I've got a
clean record and haven't been with anyone, but you, since I was tested last
month."

She
shook her head. "I take shots, and I've never had unprotected sex."

"Good."
He locked his gaze on her, while he undid his zipper. "I like knowing
there's nothing between us."

His
engorged cock stood ready and waiting. Her knees fell open and he braced
himself on his arms. She arched against him. With more patience than she had,
he teased her opening and slowly sank into her. A sigh of relief came out of
her mouth, and her pussy convulsed around him, taking his size.

"Brace
yourself on my arms." He held himself deep inside of her. "Eyes on
me. Do not take them off me."

She
followed his directions, wrapping her legs around his hips, her arms hooked
around his forearms. Then he proceeded to stroke her from the inside in almost unbearable
torture, drawing out every feeling of emptiness into something so special tears
filled her eyes. Not once did he retreat from her body, but built her up until
she gasped, the air stolen from her lungs.

Connected
and taken care of, she moved her hips in time. All her nerves extra sensitive,
her pussy convulsed, and she strained for release. Nate dropped to his elbows,
and kissed her neck. "Hold on."

He
thrust. She held on. His body grazed her clit every time he pounded into her.

Pleasure
swirled in her womb, climbing, reaching for the euphoria she knew waited at the
end. Her mouth opened. The scream burst from her chest. Her thighs clamped down
on his hips. Her body seized in an explosion of sensations.

Nate
grunted, thrusting again and again, moving her across the bed until her head
hung over the side and only when she had no more room, he groaned his release
on one last push.

He
wrapped his arms around her, rolled her to the middle of the bed, and cradled
her to his body. She nestled against his chest, secure and fulfilled. She
closed her eyes, thankful for the state of her body. Relaxed and spent, she
could no longer dwell on what Nate—she inhaled deeply—spoke to her about.

There
was no denying he connected to her on a level she was unable to comprehend.
Moments ago, he'd known exactly what she needed. He'd forced her to accept him,
and though she was expecting him to show her how rough he enjoyed sex, he took
his time. As if she needed his body part inside her to climax.

That
wasn't necessary. She'd gone months, years, without a man in her life. She'd
perfected the art of bringing herself relief to a few short minutes every night
to put her to sleep. What Nate brought her was something she failed to
recognize. Something about him filled a hollowness inside of her she didn't know
existed until he pointed it out, tempted her, and left her addicted.

"You're
a drug," she whispered.

He
stiffened. She pulled her head back and looked up at him. "What?"

His
eyes flicked from left to right and back again, studying her gaze. She sighed
deeply.

"I
could seriously become addicted to you." She bent her elbow and propped
her head on her hand. "I can't seem to say no or stop myself around you.
Then when we're having sex, it's like you read my mind, and know exactly what I
want. It's crazy."

He
stared at her, until she grew self-conscious and shifted away from him. Had she
said something wrong?

"That's
a compliment, if you can't tell." She peeked over her shoulder.

Still,
he laid there looking at her, not saying a word in reply. She pushed herself off
the bed. "Can you point me to the little girl's room?"

So
not to panic, she searched for her panties Nate pulled off her earlier and
found them at the foot of the bed. Instead of putting them on, she bunched the
material in her hand.

Nate
clasped his hands behind his head and watched her. She hesitated. He wasn't
mad. Usually the skin at the corner of his eyes crinkled when his temper
flared. No, he simply studied her, which left her confused. The feeling wasn't
good after coming down from having fantastic sex minutes ago.

She
walked across the room, opened a door, and found a large walk in closet. She
wanted to make a face at him, but instead walked back across the room and
opened the other door. She surged inside and shut the door. Because she didn't
want him to come in while she cleaned herself, she locked the door. Instead of
moving toward the toilet, she leaned against the counter.

Her
whole body shook. What was she doing?

Nate
Rafferty lay in the other room, ignoring her after testing her with a story
meant to scare her away. And, she stayed. Not only had she stayed, she loved
what he did for her.
Sick, sick, sick.

Obviously,
her independence flew right out of her body when Nate was around. He probably
got a big kick out of knowing he could bend her to his will.

"Come
here," she whispered, screwing up her mouth as she mimicked him.
"God, I'm so stupid."

She
pushed away from the counter, found a washcloth in the tall cabinet at the end
of the bathroom, and washed any evidence of her lack of sanity off. After she
deemed herself clean of Nate, she pulled on her panties, washed her hands, and
walked out into the room. She had no idea where Nate lived, only that they were
above Portland.

Nate
remained on the bed in the same position, same look on his face, same
nonjudgmental attitude directed at her. She slipped on her shoes. Hopefully, it
wouldn't take a taxi long to come pick her up.

"Okay,
so, um, I'm going to call a cab." She shrugged as she gave him a sarcastic
smile that probably appeared more grimace than happiness.

When
he refused to respond, she pursed her lips. She didn't get him.
Whatever.

She
was seriously messed up in the head, but he was an even bigger mess. She walked
toward the door.

"Addy,"
he murmured.

She
stopped. Talking with him took every miniscule of patience. She rather yell and
throw something at him. The cold indifferent Nate drove her crazy.

She
turned around. "What?"

"You're
not going anywhere, but back in bed with me," he said. "I made a
promise."

"I
don't remember what that was."
Ha! Take that Mr. Stonewall Rafferty.

"Don't
be ridiculous." He moved off the bed and stood in front of her before she
even thought of running out of the room. "We're together. I want you in my
bed, in my house, and with me when I'm not working."

She
laughed, because what he wanted could never happen. "I have to work."

"Not
tomorrow or the next day. Carpool Dolls is only open Monday through Friday. Two
hours in the morning and two hours in the evening. All the rest of the time is
mine." He framed her face with his hands. "You agreed."

"You're
changing the rules," she whispered. "You said nothing about where I'd
be staying or how I would fit in working while dating you. I own a company. I'm
responsible for other people's livelihood. You have no idea—"

"I
do." His thumb covered her lips. "I'm being considerate. You're
allowed to work, and I'll set limits if you need extra time after hours to deal
with your business. For now, all you need to know is you're in my bed
tonight…I'm not done with you yet."

"But,
you showed me what you want," she said.

He
stared down into her eyes. "Not at all. You have no clue, but you
will."

His
hand tugged at her hair and she leaned into him. She could agree with the last
part. She had two full days with him before she had to return to work, and by
then she could let him know that her job came first.

"Tomorrow,
we'll hire someone to move your things here," he said.

She
jolted. "You can't—"

He
captured her mouth, swallowing her refusal. Her push against him faded when he
stuck his tongue in her mouth. She closed her eyes. God, he could kiss.

Tomorrow,
after he finished with her tonight, she'd tell him what she wanted out of their
new relationship. He wasn't the only one who could make demands.

Chapter
Eleven

An
hour after daybreak, Nate stood at his bedroom window looking out at the
Willamette River. Instead of seeing the traffic, the city coming alive, and the
low fog rolling out of the city that he always enjoyed viewing in the early
morning hours, he kept slipping back to how Addison refused to let go of him
through the night.