I Do (20 page)

It's funny. After looking forward to my graduation all year, I am so glad that it's finally over. I suppose the wedding plans have overshadowed it a bit, but then I don't think there's anything quite as boring as a graduation ceremony. Seriously, I can't even believe that people are willing to sit and watch it. But then it's mostly just parents, and after all their hard work to put you through school, well, I suppose they deserve a little celebration–and maybe a little nap as they listen to all the same old speeches again and again. Sigh. At least it's over with, and I have my degree in hand and am ready to move on. Oh, I'm not saying that I'm finished with school forever. I may want to go back someday. But not for a long time.

I went out to see Patty and Bob today. Josh couldn't come, but I didn't mind going alone. Patty wanted me to make some decisions about where things should be during the reception. We've rented tables and chairs and whatnot, and Josh will have some guys from youth group do the setup, but Patty thought we should make them a little map.

I hadn't been out to their place since last winter when everything was white and cold and beautiful. But today it was green and lush and beautiful. And the lake was so blue it almost made your eyes hurt. “I can't believe I get to have my reception in such a fantastic location,” I told her as she gave me a little tour of the grounds. “And look at those flowers.” I pointed to the planters. “Is it just a coincidence that they're pale pink and white?”

She laughed. “I planted those annuals especially for you.”

“Thank you!”

We finally decided where things would go. Tables and chairs down in the grass, the largest deck reserved for dancing, the other deck for refreshments. I even picked out some spots for photos. Like on the dock where we figure the sun will be setting not too long after we get there. “Will it be too dark out here at night?” I asked her.

“Don't worry,” she assured me. “Your mom and aunt have that all figured out. Now, do you have time to
come inside for a glass of iced tea?”

“That sounds lovely.”

I noticed the gorgeous bouquet as soon as I got inside. “Those flowers are amazing.”

She nodded. “They're from Josh's grandmother. Mrs. Brown was by here this weekend to talk with me about the flower arrangements, and she brought these.”

“She came out here to talk about the flowers?” I was impressed.

“Yes, she wants to get them just right, and it was important for her to see the setting.”

“Did she like it?”

Patty smiled as she handed me a tall glass of tea. “Yes. Shall we take these out on the deck?”

Once we were seated comfortably on the deck, I had to take in a deep breath and just sigh. “This place feels like a little bit of heaven to me.”

Patty nodded, but I noticed the troubled look in her expression, and suddenly I remembered about Tom. Not that I'd forgotten, but with so much going on, and then planning for the reception…

“It's been good therapy for me,” she said, “keeping busy and getting the place ready. I'm really thankful that you and Josh are letting us do this.”

I kind of laughed. “Letting you? We can't believe what a gift this is to us.”

“It's a gift to me too.”

“Is it getting any better for you?” I asked, wondering if I even should. “I mean, I've heard that time heals all
wounds, but I'm not sure if it's really true.”

“I think it's partially true. But there are definitely some days when it's not. Some days I can hardly get up in the morning.”

My heart ached for her.

“Some days all I can think of is what I would do just to be able to see his face again, to hug him and to tell him how much I love him.”

Now I knew I was getting into touchy territory, and I didn't want to say anything to upset her, but I just couldn't say nothing. “I didn't really know Tom,” I began slowly. “But I do know that he made a huge life decision while he was over in Iraq.”

She studied me carefully then nodded. “Yes, Josh mentioned this shortly after Tom's death.”

“As a result, I fully expect to see him again someday.” I think I was praying silently just then, praying that I wouldn't offend or hurt her by this.

“I wish I had that kind of faith.”

“You don't really have to have that kind of faith for yourself,” I said.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that God can give you that kind of faith, if you can just get to a place where you're ready to ask Him.”

She nodded without speaking.

“He wants us to ask Him, Patty. He's just waiting to give us the faith that we so desperately need.”

It was quiet for a bit, and she seemed to actually
consider my words, but then she changed the subject back to the reception, and I left it at that. It's not like I wanted to preach at her, but I do get the feeling that God is at work in her. I'll be praying for both her and Bob more than ever now.

Finally it was time to go, and I hugged and thanked her again for opening her home up like this for us.

Several months ago, I'd read in one of those brides' magazines that it's my responsibility to host a luncheon for the bridesmaids, as well as to give them gifts. And so I had scheduled it for today. My grandma helped me to fix a lunch of quiche and salad and several other good things, including strawberries dipped in chocolate–my personal favorite.

And I'd spent most of the day yesterday just straightening up her backyard, which had been pretty neglected this spring–as well as working on my tan, since Josh has informed me that we're going to someplace beachy for our honeymoon. I'm not sure if this means we'll
be sleeping on some Mexican beach or not, but as long as I'm with Josh I won't worry.

I finally got her patio and flowerpots looking somewhat respectable, and I put a pretty tablecloth on the picnic table and set it with her good china. It really looked rather nice. At least Beanie, Jenny, and Chloe were impressed.

“You're becoming quite domestic,” said Jenny approvingly.

“A real Martha Stewart,” added Beanie.

“Yeah, Yeah.” I set the quiche in the center of the table. “Grandma coached me a lot.”

But we had a good time just sitting in the sun, eating, and talking. And then Beanie offered to model a bridesmaid dress since I've yet to see the whole thing on anyone, and she still needed to try hers on.

“Hey, these aren't bad,” she said when she came back outside wearing the pale pink gown and killer shoes. They are also pale pink with very high heels and look just like a Manolo Blahnik but at a fraction of the price. “I might not wear this dress again, but I think I could have some fun with these shoes.”

“I was wondering about long white gloves with the dress,” Jenny said as she stood and surveyed Beanie.

I considered this, then shook my head. “I think that would look overdone.”

Beanie nodded. “I agree.”

“Me too,” said Chloe.

“But the outfit still needs something,” I said as I
reached under the table for a bag I'd stowed there earlier. I pulled out a wrapped box for each of them and handed them around.

“These are gorgeous,” said Jenny, the first one to get hers opened. “Tell me they're not for real!” She held a pearl necklace up to the sunlight and peered at them.

“I wish,” I told her. “But not on my budget.” However, and I didn't mention this, these cultured pearls were not cheap, and the teardrop earrings had fourteen carat gold posts on them. We helped Beanie put hers on, then all stepped back to look.

“Flowers,” said Jenny. “That's what's missing.”

“Right.” Then I described the bouquets I'd ordered. “These are the only flowers that are costing anything,” I told them. “Pale pink rosebuds for the bridesmaids and groomsmen, and white for Josh and me.”

“Speaking of groomsmen,” said Beanie. “Who is Josh having?”

Now I specifically hadn't mentioned this to Beanie yet. But I could see there was no more putting it off.

“Actually, I'm not totally sure.”

“Huh?” Beanie peered at me.

“Well, I know that my brother Ben is one. And Zach.”

“Zach?” Beanie frowned. “Are you serious?”

“Zach and Josh have been friends for a long time,” I reminded her.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Come on, Beanie,” teased Jenny. “You still carrying a torch for that boy?”

Beanie shook her head. “Not even. But I guess it's kind of weird.” Then she smiled. “At least may be I'll have someone to dance with now.”

“But who's the third guy?” asked Jenny.

“Josh won't tell me. He says because it's not totally for sure.”

Then Beanie changed back into her regular clothes, and just when I thought it was probably time to wind this thing down (not that I wanted my friends to leave), the party suddenly switched gears. We were still out in the backyard when several of my other girlfriends suddenly appeared, and then Grandma came out with a cake that I hadn't even seen her making. And then my mom and Aunt Steph arrived, and I could tell that something was definitely going on here.

“What's up?” I asked Beanie since she seemed to be in the know.

“Just a little shower for the bride-to-be.”

“But I already had one–”

“Not like this,” she said with a wink. Jenny and Chloe were already setting out a circle of lawn chairs in the yard, and then Beanie took my hand and led me out there and told me to sit down. Before long, about a dozen of my closest female friends were all gathered around me. Even Liz was there! And Anna, fully pregnant now and looking as if she was ready to go into labor at any moment.

Of course, I should've known that this was a personal shower, but I'm sure my jaw dropped a couple of inches
when the first present I opened (from Steph, even!) was a scantly black teddy from Victoria's Secret. I stood and held up the flimsy garment while my friends made appropriate hoots and comments.

“Wow, Aunt Steph,” I finally said. “This is pretty steamy coming from a pastor's wife.”

But she just laughed. “God's the one who invented sex, Caitlin. Who should enjoy it more than a pastor's wife?”

And so it went, one embarrassing garment after another. Oh, they weren't all as risqué as Aunt Steph's. Some were more practical, like Laura's gift of bath oil and lotion. And my mom even got me a coupon for a facial, pedicure, and manicure.

“I got it several weeks ago,” she told me. “And I went ahead and made you an appointment for tomorrow morning if you're interested.”

“Interested?” I said. “I can't wait!”

I finally opened the last gift, which happened to be from Liz. I was curious since it was in a fairly large box, but I just had to crack up when I pulled out a pair of pink footy pajamas.

“Thanks, Liz.” I stood and held them up.

And as cool as anything she said, “I figured it was perfect for your wedding night. No sense in giving it all away just because you're married, right?”

Well, I didn't know what to say, but everyone else was kind of snickering.

“Oh, yeah, there's something else in the box that you
might want to wear under those.”

So I dug around until I found some tissue wrapped around the scantiest bra and panties imaginable. They were pale pink and nothing but lace. I looked at Liz and nodded. “Okay, Liz, I get you.” And everyone just laughed.

After enjoying a couple of hours of sweet pampering (I have happy toes, hands, and face now), I came back to my grandma's house and got out a big fat novel I've been dying to read, and I laid out in the sun for about an hour, then had a nice long nap. Talk about a lazy day. And I don't feel the least bit guilty. In fact, it was Aunt Steph who insisted I do nothing today. “Nothing with a capital N,” she said. And that's just what I did.

Then it was time to go the church for our wedding rehearsal, and I was totally stunned to see that Josh's mysterious best man was actually his older brother, Caleb. Now, I'd never actually met Caleb, but I knew
that he'd struggled with drug addiction and has been somewhat estranged from the family, although it's got-ten better during this last year. But I never expected him to be in our wedding.

“I would've told you,” Josh said when we were out of earshot, “but I was afraid you'd be worried. And until last week I wasn't even sure that he was really going to come through.”

“He looks so good,” I said. “I thought Chloe said he was kind of a mess.”

“He got the haircut just for the wedding.”

“That's sweet. How are your parents taking it?”

“Dad's shocked, but recovered. Mom's been crying a lot. And Chloe is ecstatic.” He looked at me. “How are you with it? I mean, I realize that he's not saved and still has a lot of prob–”

“He's your brother, Josh,” I said quickly. “And he's going to be my brother-in-law. And if you want him as your best man, that's good enough for me.”

“We better get this thing going,” called out Tony. “I hear they have another rehearsal in here at seven.”

So we all took our places and ran through the paces a couple of times. Then we went back to the miller house, where Joy had arranged for a catered meal for the entire wedding party. I could tell she was on needles and pins though, and I wanted to say something reassuring to her. But every time I got within a few feet, she scurried away. I almost began to take it personally, but Chloe pulled me aside and told me that her mom was
walking a fine line emotionally just now.