I Do (21 page)

“I think we all just need to give her some space,” she quietly warned me. “But don't worry, I'm sure she'll be okay by tomorrow.”

“Thanks, I'll be praying for her.”

I guess it didn't really occur to me that weddings can be stressful on a lot of people. Maybe it's because I've been feeling pretty relaxed and laid-back today. But now I'm reminded that lots of feelings are involved, and gatherings like this tend to ignite memories. I suppose, in some ways, it's kind of like an emotional minefield.

Here I am sitting on a sunny beach
in Hawaii, just listening to the waves slapping the shore as Josh makes another attempt at surfing. Yes, we are on our honeymoon, and it's been totally amazing and wonderful.

But oh, you ask me, dear diary–
what about the wedding?
Come on, I want to hear about the wedding? Okay, let me get this down while it's still fresh in my mind.

After a relatively quiet day (for me anyway; I'm not sure about everyone else), I went over to my parents' house and started getting my things together for the actual ceremony. I'd already gotten my bags packed for the honeymoon (somewhere beachy was all I'd been told), and one of Josh's youth group guys stopped by to pick up my stuff (since Josh and I had decided to be old-fashioned and
not see each other until it was time for me to actually walk down the aisle).

I was back in my old room (which is really mom's craft room), but all the wedding decorations were long gone by now. Beanie came over later in the afternoon to help me with my hair and makeup–it's like she had this certain image she wanted to create that would go with the dress. And when she was done, I had to agree it was perfect. Fortunately, it was a fairly natural look (my favorite), and I didn't feel as if she'd turned me into someone else. Even my hair, though pulled up, still looked soft and natural. Very nice.

“Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue,” she was saying to me as my mom came into my room. “Do you have it covered?”

I held up the blue garter that Grandma had made for me. “And almost everything is new.”

“And I loaned you my pearl barrette for your hair,” Mom said. “But what about old?”

I shrugged. “How about me? I'm getting old just sitting here and waiting for this wedding to happen.”

They laughed, then my mom looked at Beanie and she nodded. I could tell these two knew something I didn't.

“I know you were thinking about wearing pearls tonight…” began my mom. And this was true. I'd gotten myself a string of pearls just like the bridesmaids'. “But Beanie and I thought something else might look better.” Then she held out an old necklace that has been in my
mom's family for a long time. I hadn't seen it for a while and had nearly forgotten all about it. But as she held it in front of me, I could see it was absolutely perfect, and Beanie was nodding.

“I was going to wait until we were at the church.” My mom fastened the lovely gold chain around my neck, then adjusted the pearl pendant in the center. “But I wanted to make sure you were okay–”

“Okay?” I said. “This is way better than okay.”

“And way better than those pearls,” said Beanie. “No offense, because I think they look fantastic with the bridesmaids' dresses, but they were just too heavy-looking for you. You needed something more delicate, and when your mom showed me this…” She sighed happily. “Well, it was perfect.”

That's not all that was perfect. I will never forget the feeling when it was time for Dad to walk me down the aisle. First of all, he looked super and his smile was something that will be with me always, but when I got to the place where I could see the wedding party in front, well, I almost fainted. Thank God, I didn't. But it was so like that “wedding vision” I'd had last winter that for a moment I thought it wasn't real.

All the white candles were glowing, and the ivy and flowers were just the right touch, and there were my three best friends looking elegantly classy in their pale pink gowns. (And oh, those shoes!) And there were the groomsmen looking sophisticated and grown up. (Yes, even Ben, who is almost as tall as Josh now, and even Aunt
Steph's son little Oliver–now seven–standing so proudly as he held the pillow that held the rings.) And Josh's young cousin Elena in her pale pink dress and basket of rose petals that had been tossed along the aisle. It was all so perfect that I felt somewhat breathless and light-headed.

And then I locked eyes with Josh!

Okay, I know it's cliché, but my heart did skip a beat when I saw him. It wasn't so much because he was so handsome, but believe me, he was! He totally was! But it was the expression on his face that took my breath away as I slowly walked toward him. His eyes were so bright and his smile was so genuine that I knew, beyond any shadow of doubt,
this man truly loved me.
I knew that he would take good care of me. And I knew that he had been worth waiting for.

I think I was starting to cry then, which made this scene even more like my “wedding vision,” because it got just slightly blurry. But then as Dad kissed me and placed my hand in Josh's, I took a deep breath and just focused on my true love's face.

No one does a wedding like Pastor Tony. He spoke from the heart and made it feel as if God was right there with us–and I know that He was. Not only that, but Pastor Tony doesn't go on too long. As we exchanged the rings, he reminded us that the circle of the ring was like the never-ending circle of God's love for us and our love for each other.

We both got a little teary eyed as we said our vows,
and the next thing I knew, we were kneeling for communion and Kim Peterson was playing the most beautiful violin solo of “Ave Maria.” I even got goose bumps.

And suddenly Pastor Tony was pronouncing us “husband and wife,” and we were kissing and being introduced to everyone as “Mr. and Mrs. Joshua Miller.” Well, you should've heard the cheers.

The guests were excused to head out to the reception, and we'd been promised by the photographer (a college buddy of Josh's who was giving us a real deal) that the church photos would take less than twenty minutes. We made him stick to his promise, because we didn't want our guests to be waiting too long.

Then as we were heading out of the church, I spotted a white stretch limousine approaching, and I looked at Josh, thinking that couldn't possibly be for us–but it was. Josh was just as surprised as I was, but it turned out that Chloe had ordered it. All eight of us got in and were driven in style over to Patty and Bob's beautiful lakeside home.

Honestly, it just got better and better after that. The yard looked amazing with all the white-covered tables and flower arrangements. It wasn't long before the sun was going down on the lake, and there was just enough cloud in the sky to give everything a soft, rosy glow. “I think that's for you,” Josh whispered in my ear. “A special wedding greeting.”

The most money I'd spent on anything for the wedding was to have a catered buffet for the guests. It
had just seemed the right thing to do, and I think everyone enjoyed it. I particularly enjoyed the strawberries dipped in chocolate that Aunt Steph had spent all last night making.

“You did this for me?” I said as I hugged her.

“I wouldn't do it for anyone else!”

The wedding cake was beautiful AND delicious. Even the band was good–and man, were they excited to meet Jeremy Baxter! Then Chloe, Allie, and Laura got up there and played a song that Chloe had written for Josh and me, called “Just Waiting.” Of course, it made us both cry. And then to lighten the mood, she and the girls did a number that totally rocked the house.

As the evening shadows grew longer, I noticed dainty strings of white lights hanging in the trees and around deck railings. And I think little fairies went around lighting about a hundred candles that were protected from the lake breeze by glass jars. It was truly magical.

Besides being with Josh, one of my favorite moments at the reception was when Joy came and took me aside. At first I was worried that something had gone wrong because her face looked somewhat serious.

“You've put together the most beautiful wedding ever,” she told me. “And I want to apologize for all the grief I'm sure I put you through.” She shook her head. “I just couldn't imagine how you could possibly pull this off. Especially when you seemed so unconcerned about everything.”

I kind of laughed. “Oh, it's not that I wasn't concerned.
It's just that I was really trying to trust God.”

“Yes, that's the same thing Josh and Chloe keep telling me. But for some reason, you kids seem to understand these things better.” She smiled. “I guess it's like they say, a child shall lead them.” Then she gave me a big hug. “I am so proud to have you for my daughter-in-law, Caitlin. Josh is one lucky young man.”

Well, I thought that was pretty good coming from her. And I did forgive her for all the times when she questioned me or made me feel like I was clueless when it came to weddings. The truth of the matter is, I actually was fairly naive. But I think I got the important things right. And that made all the difference.

One of the funniest moments (for me) was when Josh's second cousin Meg cornered me and demanded to know who my wedding planner was (she's getting married next year). I smiled at her and said, “God.” She just looked at me like I hadn't heard her right, then repeated her question. “God,” I said again. “The divine wedding planner.” Then she shook her head and probably assumed I was suffering from wedding day overload.

Oh, there were lots of great moments at the reception. I'm sure they're all field somewhere in my memory. But mostly I remember how Josh held on to my hand and how he kept looking into my eyes and reminding me that this was for real.

And finally, it was getting late, and I knew it was time to get ready to go. I went into Patty's elegant guest room to change into my “going away” outfit, selected by
Beanie and quite stylish as it turned out. But before I could leave, I just had to drop to my knees and thank God for all the miracles in my life–not just for this day–but all along the way.

Then I went back outside and was told that the bridesmaids wanted me to go stand on the dock to throw my wedding bouquet. So, hoping they didn't plan to toss me into the drink, I complied.

Standing on the dock, I turned my back to the young women who were gathered around, hoping to catch my beautiful roses (which I had already instructed Beanie to rescue afterward since I plan to save them), and I gave it a big underhand toss. And guess who caught it? Chloe Miller.

Well, I had to laugh at that and I did remind her that she was way too young to even think about it. But she just grinned in typical Chloe fashion. Then she pointed over my shoulder and said, “Hey, looks like your getaway is here.” Surprised, I turned to the lake to see a white motorboat approaching.

“Let's go, Caitie,” Josh said as he grabbed my hand. And suddenly everyone was throwing birdseed (better than rice on the Miller's lovely grounds), and Josh and I were running to get into the boat.

Of course, his youth group boys were disappointed since they had some crazy chase planned. And I'd already seen the Jeep all covered in toilet paper, whipped cream, and tin cans. But I didn't mind avoiding that as Josh and I sat in the back of the boat and
waved to our guests as we pulled out, leaving a wake behind us. Of course, we shared some nice kisses as we enjoyed a quick ride across the lake.

Then we were met by a taxi, ordered by Josh, and taken to the nicest hotel in our area. And here comes the part where even my diary doesn't get to hear about everything. But trust me, it was good.

It wasn't until the next morning that Josh told me where we were going on our honeymoon. I was preparing myself for the fleabag motel in Tijuana when he pulled a packet out of his jacket pocket. “Compliments of Chloe. She made me promise not to tell you until we were on our way.”

And that's why I am sitting here on one of the most beautiful beaches in Maui right now. We have another whole week before we fly down to Mexico. Chloe booked the tickets so that we could go directly to the mission. And Josh arranged for a couple of college guys to drive his Jeep down, so we'll have it to use and drive back when we're done.

“Do you think God will keep us in Mexico longer than just for the summer?” I asked my sweet husband this morning.

He go a slightly puzzled look just then. “I'm not sure. I've always been open to staying down there indefinitely. And I still am. But I have to admit that as we were getting things ready for the wedding, and then even at the wedding, it occurred to me how many friends and family members we have that still need God's touch in their
lives. And then there's the youth group.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“So, what are you thinking?” he asked.

“I guess I'm open to wherever God wants to take us.”

He grinned. “That's what I love about you, Caitlin.”

And that's what I love about him too. I know that, more than anything, we both want to serve God with our whole hearts. And wherever that takes us and however we get there, it'll all be worth it in the end.

The End

(Or beginning…)