Authors: Susan Harris
I did not read
or listen to any of them but just dialled his number.
After a few rings
I heard his voice and felt my heart racing.
‘Hello, is
that you Autum?’
“Yes it’s me”
‘Thank god,
where have you been? I’ve been going out of my head with wor...’
I cut off his
words as I did not want to hear them.
‘We need to
talk, are you free tomorrow around six’ “Yes of course”
‘Then meet me
at the coffee shop down the street you know which one”
‘Yes I’ll be
there, how have you…”
I cut off the
phone, my head pounding and my breathing erratic.
My first
hurdle out of the way, how will I be able to tell Frank, will he trust me
enough to do this without help, closure that’s all I’m asking for.
We met Frank
downstairs for seven and he took us to a lovely Chinese restaurant.
I played
around with my food and thought that Frank realised something was wrong.
He kept trying
to give Rebecca the eye to find out what was going on so I just blurted it out.
‘Just to let
you know I have decided to meet up with Jack tomorrow at six”
Frank looked
over at Rebecca, who then shrugged her shoulders back to him, as if to say, I
tried to talk her out of it, and then he looked at me.
His face was
going a slight shade of pink and I know that look,
he’s angry.
‘Is that
wise?’
“Yes, I needed
some closure and the sooner I do this the better”.
‘And if you
don’t get closure?’
“Then I will deal
with whatever comes my way”
As I continued
playing with this delicious food that should have been in my mouth, Frank’s
words played on my mind.
I never
thought about not getting closure, what would happen to me if I wasn’t going to
get it?
He was a two
timing cheat and after tomorrow I would never need to speak to him again. What
could go wrong!
We left the
restaurant at ten, thirty, and I said my goodnight to Rebecca as Frank dropped
her home first.
Prepare to
face the music!
The small drive
back to my apartment was in silence. ‘Will you come up?”
He did. I made
him a drink and we sat down.
‘Listen Frank,
I can tell you’re not happy, and it may be hard for you to understand
especially with what I went through but please let me just do this one thing”
‘It was just a
shock when you said it at the restaurant that’s all.
I know you
need to do this; I just hope you don’t come out more damaged than when you went
in”
What did he
mean by that?
This was going
to be my first night in my new and improved apartment but with the evening’s
events, I started to get uncomfortable knowing that Jack knew I was probably
back and that he may come round not wanting to wait until tomorrow.
I needed Frank
to stay the night, but would he now that he knew what I was planning.
How could I
ask him now?
Should I just
explain that I feel scared? I bite the bullet and asked him anyway.
“Frank, you
can say no if you want but…”
“You want me
to stay over?”
“Err yes, how
did you know?”
“Just a
feeling I got when you asked me to come in. At first I thought you may have
asked Rebecca being your first night here alone, but when I dropped her home
well I just presumed.
‘So will you
stay then?’
“If you want
me to, I will need to go home and get some things”
‘Please don’t
go’
The statement
came out rushed and I started to panic as I grabbed his arm for dear life, he
sensed it.
Get a grip,
why am I feeling this way, I have nothing to be afraid of?
‘Are you ok?
I couldn’t let
him go and moved closer to him.
‘Just don’t go
please’
We cuddled
together as I wrapped myself into his warm embrace on the sofa.
His heat and
the fact that I now felt safe sent me off to sleep.
I must have
been restless in my sleep and knew that my heat source had gone. When I opened
my eyes I was in my bed
; I didn’t even feel him carry me there.
I quickly
climbed off my bed misjudging how high it was and the distance to the floor and
nearly toppled over
damn.
I went into
the living room and there he was, asleep.
His jacket was
folded over the sofa, his shirt buttons undone and his sleeves rolled up.
I walked
around for a better look, he was breathtaking.
Just
imagine waking up to that every morning.
His chest
wasn’t hairy but had enough fine hairs for you to run your fingers through it.
Why didn’t
he just sleep in the spare room?
I looked at
his hair as he slept. It had that “I’ve just been shagged look” as he rested it
on the cushions.
I went back
into the spare bedroom to get him a blanket, but before I put the cover over
him, I took a good look at this handsome man lying before me.
I bent down
and whispered ‘don’t give up on me Frank, I want you, and I hope you want me’
then kissed him gently on his cheek before going back to my room. What I didn’t
realise is that once I had stepped out,
Frank opened
his eyes.
It was six,
thirty in the morning and I needed to get ready for two big events, going back
to work and meeting Jack.
Whore bitch
was now on a different floor so our paths should not cross.
When I went
into the living room Frank was not there, but I could smell something coming
from the kitchen. He was preparing breakfast.
‘Hungry?’
“Yes, but I
never thought you could cook you know with José”
Frank laughed.
“I can cook breakfast you know I am not that useless, and anyway I couldn’t get
my cook to come over” ‘Your cook?’
He laughs
again. “Only kidding,” I laughed too. Rebecca really did go all out on the
shopping; there was enough food for a small army.
I had poached
eggs, bacon and tomatoes with two rounds of toast and a latte.
‘You should be
the one resting; I should have made breakfast for you since you are my guest.”
“Well, I
usually wake around five and hit the gym before I go to work, keeps me alert
for the day ahead”
“Five?” I say
at the thought.
He laughed and
shook his head.
He left to go
home and to change for work, “shall I pick you up?”
‘No I’ll be
fine’
“You’re sure?”
“Yes thanks,
will see you at work”
He kissed me
on the cheek and left;
I stared at
the door for ages then headed towards the bathroom.
I got into
work for eight, and felt apprehensive going through reception.
I felt that
everyone knew what had happened and was staring at me. The truth was that no
one had batted an eyelid but right now I felt paranoid.
I said hello
to Janice and Bob in reception then headed toward the lift to the fourth floor.
A few staff
said hello and asked me if I had enjoyed my holiday
, holiday? I wish I’d
known that, I would have been better prepared.
“Yes thanks,
just went home to visit the family,
” at least I said home, which could be
anywhere, “but glad to be back,” and the truth was, that I was glad to be back.
Rebecca came
to meet me soon afterwards.
Holiday
“We thought it
would not draw any attention”
‘Thanks’
I spent most
of the morning catching up with my emails and office gossip.
Rebecca also
filled me in on anything I might have missed; assignments etc. and the morning
flew by.
I went out for
lunch with Rebecca to my favourite deli and then stopped as I saw Isabelle
heading towards the same exit as me.
I tried to
find another way out, but there wasn’t. I thought I could handle seeing her but
I couldn’t, not yet anyway, it was too soon.
I could feel
myself getting angry and for the first time actually wanting to attack the
bitch, but this was not the place or the time to do it.
I took a few
deep breaths and with Rebecca holding onto my arm, I felt composed,
not
worth it.
Isabelle was
smug as she headed my way
and I thought she was my friend as I laughed
inside to myself.
She held her
head high as if butter wouldn’t melt, showing no remorse, no guilt, the bitch.
As we came
within arms distance of each other, I put on a smile and asked her how her day
had been.
I’m not sure
who looked more aghast Rebecca or Isabelle.
She stuttered
and couldn’t form any proper sentence just only to say it was great,
liar
I continued to
walk, but could feel that intense burning in my back,
yep! She sure was
plunging that knife in, as I smiled to myself, one down, just one more to go.
The rest of
the day flew by and I started to feel uneasy. The incident with Isabelle took
all my strength and now I would be facing Jack.
This was only
a meeting, I kept telling myself.
If I could
handle that smug bitch, he should be no problem, I was the one in control of
this meeting, and would decide when I had heard enough of his bullshit to call
it a day.
It was five,
forty five and I phoned Frank to let him know that I was now leaving the
office.
He had asked
me how my day had been and I filled him in with the brief encounter that I had
with Isabelle.
‘Will you
promise to call me when you can?”
‘Of course and
will you promise to come around later?”
‘If that’s
what you want, then sure’
With that I
hung up the phone, topped up my lippy, sprayed my perfume and headed for the
coffee shop.
It was now six
and I ordered myself a latte.
I thought that
I might need that extra boost of energy when I saw him.
My heart was
beating fast but I knew it was only nerves and after a few sips I could smell
him, the aftershave I had grown to love so much.
I looked up to
see him standing there, as sexy as ever and my heart fluttered.
Oh god this
should not be happening to me.
‘Can I sit?”
“Of course you
can” I said quite sharply and brought myself back to the reason why I was here.
‘You look
gorgeous as ever.’ I didn’t reply.
‘How have you
been?”
Bingo!
‘Well let’s
see shall we? I go on a business trip engaged; I make daily phone calls to my
fiancé who I thought worshiped the ground I walk on.”
‘I do’
“Shut it!”
“We have the
best phone sex ever, and then I come home early to find you fucking my best
friend in my bed”. “How the fuck, do you think I have been?
“Babes,” “Who
the fuck, are you calling babes?”
“You need to
believe me when I say that I don’t now what came over me”
‘I think it
was her pussy in your face’
“I was already
staying at your apartment when she came over. She said that she had bought in a
few supplies for your return and then she was all over me.
‘And you
really put up a fight from what I could see’
“It wasn’t
like that, I was missing you, she was there and it just happened”
He stretched
out his hand to hold mine and I pulled back.
‘Did you ever
love me Jack?’
“I still do,
you know that, why do you think I have been going out of my brain trying to
find out where you have been? We’ve been together for three years, we plan to
marry, have kids, it was just a mistake, one that I will regret for the rest of
my life”
‘You got that
right’
‘Take me back
please. I promise you I’ll do anything to prove how much I love you”
I looked up at
Jack and saw his sexy face and I was starting to lose my grip on this
situation.
I was now
blaming her and not him, forgetting it takes two to tango.
This wasn’t
going to plan and I needed to change tact.
‘Where did you
have sex in my house, I want to know?”
“Don’t do this
Autum please, it doesn’t matter”
“Where the fuck
did you have sex?”
I shouted, a
bit louder than expected and people in the coffee shop started to look up,
heads turning towards us.
He started to
whisper now as he went through what he had done and where he had done it.
”We did it on
the living room floor and sofa, the dining table”
‘Dining
table?”
“Oh I get it;
I’m not adventurous enough for you. We’ve never done it on the table but you
have no issues doing it with that whore?”
“What can I
say? She’s a wild one”
“How dare you,
I was feeling sick and a lump had started to form in my throat”
“Where else?”
“The bedroom”.
He looked up to see my response but I gave him none, still numb from his
confession.
‘I’m so sorry.’
I tried to
blank it out. I wanted to know and now I knew, but hearing it made me feel
worse and I was in a state of shock.
When I looked
at his face, I saw him and her together.
I pictured
them all over my house having sex laughing behind my back, I needed some air.
Tears started
to form which made me angrier that this was what he had reduced me to as I
tried desperately for him not to see me like this.
‘I hope she
was worth it Jack, you lying bastard. You say you love me but still you had
time to fuck that whore over and over again in my house. Not once did you think
of me. I bet if I never came home that night you would still have been at it
behind my back. How long has this been going on and don’t fucking tell me this
was a one off or so help me Jack I will phone that bitch and get her over here to
see who’s telling the truth”