In The Still of the Night [The Protectors 2] (Siren Publishing Classic) (21 page)

“So they are going to rule Gregg’s death self-defense?” she managed to ask despite the boulder lodged in her throat.

“It looks that way,” was all he said.

“So are you staying for awhile or leaving now that it’s over?”

“I’m gonna stick for awhile if you’ll let me. I want to make sure you don’t have any problems from the police.”

“Sure,” she managed despite the tears welling in her eyes.

Angrily, she swallowed hard enough it hurt to keep the tears at bay. She would not fall apart. This had always been a possibility. It wouldn’t be the end of the world, maybe her world, but not
the
world.

“Do you need help with anything?” he finally asked.

“No, I don’t need help.” She made herself look him in the eyes. “Tina and I have always been able to take care of things ourselves.”

“You’re a strong woman. It’s something I admire about you.”

“Okay, here’s coffee.” Tina walked into the room with two cups of coffee with Logan right behind her with two more.

Jenna took her cup from Tina and sipped it, grateful her hands didn’t shake. Inside she was shaking all apart. How would she find the strength to pick up the pieces and put them back together again when he left? How many times had she started over?

She took too large a gulp of coffee and choked. Instantly, Riley was there taking the coffee from her hands and sitting it on an end table. He patted her back and watched her with his intense dark eyes.

“I’m okay,” she sputtered. “I just swallowed wrong.”

Riley didn’t move away from her once she’d regained her breath. Instead, he seemed to hover over her, almost guarding her. She didn’t need guarding now. The threat was over. She needed him to be the man he’d been before he’d gone to talk to the police. This man, this new person before he confused her. Distant, almost aloof one minute then caring and worried the next. She didn’t know what to believe.

“I think it’s been a long day. Tina, we should be going.” Logan took her cup of coffee and headed for the kitchen.

Tina smiled a bright, forced smile. “It’s been a long couple of days.”

Logan returned and took her hand in his.

“You don’t have to leave so soon,” Jenna said.

“No, you need to get some rest,” Logan began. “You haven’t had any in several days.”

“Jenna, call me tomorrow, okay?” Tina looked worried about leaving her.

“I will.”

She followed Logan and Tina to the front door and saw them out. Once they were gone, the house felt huge and empty save one person dominating the living room just by his presence. Riley had recovered her coffee cup and his own. He crossed the room to deposit them in the kitchen.

“I can do that.” Jenna rushed to take them from him.

He relinquished them but with some reluctance.

“I can manage to put away some cups,” he said and followed her into the kitchen.

“But it’s my house,” was all she said.

Jenna turned back from the sink to find him directly behind her, so close she could feel the heat from his body seep into her skin. She looked up into his face to find need there. A strong, fierce need filled his face while anguish filled his eyes. Then it was gone as if it had never been. His face once more appeared as neutral as ever. No hint of his feelings for her or about the situation leaked from his stoic façade.

“You’re tired.” He rested his hands on her shoulders. “Let’s get you into the shower and then to bed.”

Without waiting to see if he would follow, she turned from his hands and shuffled to the bedroom. She didn’t expect him to join her in the shower, so when she stripped and stepped under the hot spray, he startled her when he followed her.

He took the bath cloth from her hands and began soaping it. Jenna wasn’t sure what to feel. One minute she felt cared for, cherished, and the next she felt almost shunned. It was all too much for her to handle. Tears flowed silently unchecked down her cheeks as he soaped her back and began bathing her. She didn’t even attempt to try to hide them now. He would know how she felt. Her face had to be an open book for him to read.

“Don’t cry, baby.” His lips brushed against her ear.

Jenna didn’t say anything. What could she say? Nothing would change his mind about leaving, and what would be the point anyway? If he didn’t care enough about her…love her enough to stay, then she didn’t need him around.

“I’m no good for you. I’m not the settling down kind of guy you need,” he explained.

“I don’t think you know anything about what I need, let alone what I want.”

“Maybe not.” He turned her around and grasped both her upper arms, pulling her into him.

His lips closed over hers in a fiery kiss that pulled her to her toes and burned a path straight through to her inner core. Helpless in his grasp, all Jenna could do was take the pleasure as he dealt it out to her. Each nibble of his teeth on her lip, each tease of his tongue stirred passions in her she had only found when in his arms. She doubted she would ever feel it again. Not the kind that stirred her blood to a boiling point, the type that had her begging for anything and everything he wanted to do to her. In the heat of his passion, Riley could literally have her anyway he wanted her, and she’d beg for more.

He pulled back from the kiss to stare down at her. She watched him watch her then let her eyes flutter shut.

“No, don’t close your eyes. Look at me,” he said.

Jenna opened her eyes to find him staring intently down at her. He let go of her arms to grab one of her legs and wrap it around his hips. Before she knew what he was planning, he surged up and into her, his massive cock impaling her. She found herself on her tip toes once again. Riley reached down and grabbed her other leg and held her against the back of the shower stall as he pounded into her.

He reached between them and found her clit. He circled it with one finger then captured it between thumb and forefinger. Just the touch was enough to send her spiraling upward. When he pinched her clit, she shot off like a bottle rocket on the Fourth of July. Sparklers ignited behind her eyelids, and she was sure she would be blind when it was all over with. Then he bit her. Hard. She would have a bruise where he’d taken a bite near her neck on her shoulder.

“Fuck, I can’t get enough of you.” Riley growled.

“Evidently, you can. You’re leaving.” Why had she said anything at all, much less that?

To his credit, Riley didn’t respond. He eased out of her and rinsed them both off before shutting off the shower and grabbing towels to dry them with.

She stepped away from him and used the rough cotton material to remove all traces of water from her skin. Then she slipped past him to the bedroom. For the first time since they’d slept together, Jenna pulled out a sleeping shirt and underwear. She dressed and climbed into bed, shutting off the light on her bedside table, uncaring of how he would find his way to bed. Hell, he could sleep on the couch as far as she was concerned. Only she didn’t really mean it. She craved any small bit of closeness she could gleam from him.

The bed sank on the other side and then bumped as Riley climbed in and got comfortable. She lay there a long time waiting for him to fall asleep so maybe she could. She hadn’t realized how rigid she held herself until she relaxed and her stiff muscles protested the change in position.

Just as her eyelids drooped, Riley’s hand snaked around her waist to rest lightly against her belly. He snuggled up against her until his rigid dick pressed against the crack of her ass. Somehow it seemed more intimate than just the act of sharing a bed did.

“Go to sleep, Jenna. You need to rest. There’s been way too much violence in your life lately.”

Chapter Fifteen

“Are you sure it’s a good idea for you to go back to work so soon?” Tina asked.

“Yeah, I’m healed, and Gregg is gone. I need to get back into my normal routine,” Jenna said.

She sipped the coffee then set it back on the table in front of her. Her doctor wanted her to take one more week off, but she knew Riley was getting ready to leave. She needed something to occupy her mind, or she would go crazy.

“I don’t know about healed,” she said. “You’re covered in bruises still.”

“Well, mostly healed.”

Tina cupped her coffee with both hands without looking at her.

“This is about Riley leaving, isn’t it?”

Jenna swallowed. “I said I wasn’t going to get attached to him. I knew better than to let him get to me.”

“I can’t believe he would leave. He cares about you. It’s all over his face,” Tina argued.

“Obviously it isn’t enough.”

“Maybe it’s too much.” Tina reached out and touched Jenna’s hand.

“Too much?” Jenna couldn’t hold back the quick sob.

“He thinks he’s no good for you. He’s being noble,” Tina explained.

“Well, he can take his nobility and fuck himself.” Jenna’s voice cracked.

It hurt so damn much to know he wasn’t going to stay. They had circled around each other the last few days. Somehow the sex was more intense than before but no less satisfying. It was afterward that lacked the intimacy of before. He didn’t hold her close anymore. He might as well have slept in the other room than have stayed in the bed with her but apart from her. Somehow she couldn’t make herself demand he do that. She craved any contact with him she could get. She wanted everything he would give her while he was still there.

“Oh, Jenna, I wish I could do something to help.” Tina got out of her chair and walked around the table to hug her.

“There’s nothing either one of us can do to change his mind. Even if there were, I wouldn’t want to do it. I don’t want him staying unless he wants to. I’m nobody’s charity case.”

“Come on. Let’s run to town and look for something to wear tomorrow like a nice new sweater or blouse,” Tina suggested.

Jenna smiled. Her friend was valiantly trying to cheer her up. They both knew that nothing would make it any easier. Still, it would pass the time while Riley was off with Morgan and Taylor. The other two men were leaving the next morning. She wasn’t sure why he wasn’t going with them but wasn’t going to question it. It gave her a few more days with him.

“Sure. I could use something to go with my camel-colored slacks.”

They took Tina’s car since it was parked behind hers. Her mind wandered as they drove. Tina didn’t try and force a conversation for which she was eternally grateful. She wasn’t up to small talk. Instead, she thought about the way she and Riley seemed to fit together. Not just in bed. Hell yeah, the sex was un-fucking-believable, but it was more than that. They meshed in other things. Their likes and dislikes in food and TV were so similar as to be amazing. Their views on life in general were along the same lines with a few key differences that allowed for some intriguing arguments. It added spice to their relationship.

Relationship. Obviously they hadn’t really had one, or he wouldn’t be walking out without a thought. Maybe that wasn’t fair. He believed he was doing what was best for her. Why couldn’t he see that what was best for her was for him to stick around? Her heart was breaking. Couldn’t he tell that? Didn’t he realize he was tearing a part of her to pieces?

“So, which one do you want to start with?” Tina asked.

“Huh? Oh, I’m sorry. What did you say?”

“I was just asking where you wanted to start looking. Belk’s or Paula’s?” Tina said again.

“Um, I haven’t been to Paula’s in awhile. Let’s start there.”

“I know your heart isn’t in this, but try to pay attention. I would hate to see you pick out an ugly, tan sweater to go with those beautiful silk slacks of yours.”

Jenna laughed. The tears that threatened to fall receded for the time being. She could do this. She had to do this. This was the beginning of the rest of her life. A life without Riley.

* * * *

“Man, are you really going to leave her?” Morgan asked.

“Don’t start, Morgan.” Riley turned up his beer.

Tyler motioned the bartender for another round. Riley grunted. Getting drunk wasn’t the answer. So what was the answer? Because right now, he felt like shit. He was hurting Jenna.
Yeah, but I would only hurt her worse later down the road.
Maybe not. Maybe he wouldn’t leave at all.
Yeah, right. I don’t last more than six months in any relationship.
Hell, the longest he’d ever lasted anywhere had been in the army.

“So, where are you planning to go next? I think I’m heading north. I might run up and see Dodge,” Morgan said.

“I’m heading for the ocean,” Tyler offered.

“You’ve been awful quiet, Logan.” Riley knew he was asking for it when he said it.

“Not much to say. I’ve already told you what an asshole you are.”

“Yeah, and like I told you, better now than later when it will only be worse.”

“I still think you’re selling yourself short. You love her, damn it. It’s obvious as hell to me. I still don’t think you’ll leave her.”

“Just because you settled down, doesn’t mean it’s for all of us, Logan.” Riley threw his money down to cover the bill and stomped out of the bar.

Logan didn’t know what he was talking about. There was no way in hell he would settle down. He’d been moving around since he was a kid when they moved him from foster home to foster home. He didn’t know what settling down was.

Riley jumped on the bike and roared off. He rode for a couple of hours, trying to calm down. When he finally pulled into the drive at Jenna’s, he’d made his plans. He wasn’t really happy with them but knew they were what needed to happen.

Jenna opened the door before he got to it and stepped back for him to go in. For the first time in several days, red-rimmed eyes didn’t meet him. Instead, she looked more resolved than anything. Somehow it hurt a little bit to realize she had come to terms with his leaving.

“I was just about to make a pot of coffee. Do you want some?” she asked.

“Yeah, sounds good. I’m going to go take a shower.”

Jenna nodded and turned toward the coffeepot. He started to say something but changed his mind and headed back to the bathroom. He needed to wash away the bitterness inside him as well as the beer and road grime. Maybe everything would click into place because despite his resolve to do what he thought was best, it didn’t feel right.

After drying off, he pulled on a pair of jeans and forwent the shirt. She sat at the kitchen table, sipping on the coffee and staring off into nothing. His heart hurt at the sight.

“Smells good,” he said and walked to the counter to pour a cup.

“I’m almost out of the dark roast. I am thinking about trying something different next.”

Small talk. He sighed.

“You should try that Southern Pecan. You were thinking about it the last time we were at the coffee house.”

“I’m going back to work on Monday.” She took another sip of coffee.

“Didn’t the doctor want you to wait another week?” He watched her face.

“I can’t see sitting around the house with nothing to do. If I’m tired by lunch, I can go home early for a few days. I’ll be fine.”

They lapsed into silence, drinking their coffee without looking at each other. It weighed heavy on him. When she got up to rinse out her cup, he followed suit. His hand hovered over her shoulder for an instant before he dropped it and waited for her to finish. She reached back and took his cup, as well, leaving him with nothing to do. He stepped back away from her.

“I think I’ll take a bath and get ready for bed,” she said, smiling up at him.

As smiles went, it was a brittle smile. Still, she made the effort. He watched as she walked out of the kitchen toward the bedroom. He hung back, waiting on her to get in the bathroom before he followed. She’d shut the door. Something she’d hadn’t done since they’d been sleeping together. He rubbed a hand over his face then turned and pulled the covers back on the bed. He took time to pack his pack and set it outside the door.

Riley walked over to the bathroom door and stood there for a few minutes, contemplating whether to go in or not. In the end, he walked away.

* * * *

Jenna waited while the water filled the tub. She sprinkled some of her bath salts in the water and inhaled as they dispersed the fragrant scent of lavender. She needed the calming quality of the herb tonight. Her nerves were about shot.

As soon as she turned it off, she climbed in the warm, soothing waters and leaned back against the bath cushion. Slowly, her muscles began to relax after having been tight all day from the stress of trying to hold in her anguish. Tina’s presence had both helped and hurt her. It kept her from breaking down and wallowing in her pain, but it had also prevented her from getting used to being alone again.

She relaxed for awhile longer before bathing and getting out of the tub. She dried off quickly and pulled on her T-shirt and panties. Wearing them to bed helped her separate the sex from the intimate act of sleeping together. She needed that right now. She might regret it later, but for now, it worked for her.

When she walked back into the bedroom, it was to find Riley already in bed. He’d rolled over to one side and seemed to be asleep. She sighed and climbed into bed before turning off the bedside light. It would be another long night, she decided, and turned her back to him in hopes sleep wouldn’t elude her again.

She wasn’t sure how much time had gone by when Riley rolled over and wrapped his arms around her. She sighed and turned toward him. His mouth found hers in a soft kiss that deepened when she responded to him. She couldn’t help but respond when her entire body craved his touch.

His hands slipped under her shirt to find her breasts. They molded them then settled on her nipples. First rolling them between thumb and forefinger then pinching and pulling them. He knew her body so well. His fingers knew how hard to pull, how far to twist.

Riley broke their kiss to settle on her abdomen with his mouth. He licked, nipped, and sucked his way upward pushing her shirt higher and higher until it settled under her chin as his mouth replaced his fingers on her breasts. He suckled first one taunt nipple then the other. His teeth grazed them, drawing mewling noises from her as he laved them with his tongue. She couldn’t be still under his ministrations.

“I love how responsive you are to me,” he whispered to her.

She moaned when he returned to her lips while his hands drew her shirt over her head and over his. He retreated to toss her shirt off the bed. He raked his teeth along her jaw until he reached her ear. The sensation sent chills along her arms and down her spine. His teeth nipped at her earlobe before he drew it in his mouth and sucked. When he released it to trail kisses down her neck, she wrapped her arms around his neck to hold him there. Her neck was so sensitive there, and he knew it, taking extra time there to tease her with his tongue.

A hand snaked down beneath her panties to massage her mound. Then he withdrew it to trail over her pelvis, making her squirm, another sensitive spot he’d discovered over their many lovemaking sessions.

Jenna didn’t think she could take much more teasing. Already her juices were seeping between her legs in preparation for his cock. She needed him inside her.

“Please,” she whimpered.