INFECtIOUS (38 page)

Tim
pushes away from the wall and strides across the room to me. He bends down in
front of me, blocking my view of Matt's penetrating eyes. "Ivy? Please?
Please stay with me? Atlanta is the most dangerous place in the world for you.
My brother was living there, and he told me they slaughter the Living on sight.
There aren't any safe communities like
Toccoa
. There
isn't anyone left Alive there. You would be taking Rosa to her death. Please
don't let him trick you? I love you, Ivy. I will take care of you. I'll take
you to the beach and we can give Rosa a life there."

I'm
speechless. I knew he cared for me a lot. I had guessed that he loved me. But
to hear him say it, no to hear him plead with me because of it, I am completely
torn. If Matt is right and my dad is alive, how can I not try to find him? Why
does Pravda have him in a prison cell?
Could my mom be alive
somewhere too?
It's beyond my wildest dreams that I could actually see
my family again.

But
I made a commitment to care for Rosa. Atlanta is so dangerous. If I took her
there and she was killed or hurt—
How
could I trade
her for the hope that Matt is right about my dad? And I have to decide right
now because every minute we wait brings Pravda closer to finding us. Dear God,
what do I do? Which path do I pick? I am terrified to make this choice. I feel
like Tim is the good angel on one shoulder and Matt is the devil on my other
shoulder. They both sound right.

Matt
speaks again quietly, out of my view behind Tim. The cellar is so small and the
sound carries well so we all hear him despite his low voice. "He talked
about you and your mom.
And your sister.
You have an
older sister don't you Ivy? She ran away a long time ago and your parents
blamed themselves."

Tim's
shoulders fall visibly and he closes his eyes. I just told him about Hazel. He
knows Matt is telling the truth. Matt really did meet my dad.

Then
Matt says, "I think you have more family than you realize, Ivy. There was
an old woman there too. I heard your dad talk to her a lot. Do you know someone
named Betty?"

I
can't hold back the audible gasp that escapes my lips. Aunty Betty!

"Tim!"
I can't help how excited I sound, "It's my Aunty Betty!
The
woman in the picture next to Aunty Coe.
You know?
The
silver frame by her bed?
We thought she was dead! Tim, I have to go. You
understand that don't you? If it was your family, you'd go."

"Even
if you go with him, how will you get to them? Get yourself captured too? What
about Rosa?" His words are full of wisdom and responsibility. He's right.
How would I get to them?

Matt
answers his charge for me. "I was in there myself and I know how to get
them out. I have a friend inside Pravda who will help me for a price. Credits
talk. I can get them out. You can be with them again, Ivy."

"Tim,
please? If it was your dad, I know you would go. You are honorable and brave
and you would go for your family. I have to go if there's a chance I can get
them out.
A chance to see my dad again?"

His
slight nod is barely noticeable.

"Please
come with me?" I plead with watery eyes.

At
this request, Matt is up off the floor and fighting for my line of sight.

"Absolutely
not, Ivy.
I am taking you and Tom and Rosa and
that's it. I never offered to bring anyone else. I'm not jeopardizing Tom by
bringing them. It's too many people. I'll never get us all safely into Atlanta.
I'm already bringing Rosa for you!"

"I
won't go without them." I desperately hope he doesn't call my bluff. I'm
pretty sure if he refuses and leaves me here I'll die. I need to be with him.
And he's the only way I'll ever find my dad. I am clinging to the chance that
he feels something strong for me too, that he needs me as much as I need him. I
cross my arms where I sit resolutely, Tim still crouching in front of me. They
have both seen my stubborn side before.

Matt's
voice is almost whiny, "Ivy, you know how I feel about you, don't you? I
care for you. I want to take care of you. I think you feel the same way about me.
Why are you asking me to bring Lover Boy? He'll just be in our way!"

I'm
embarrassed about how plainly Matt is speaking in front of Tim. That feeling
that I've let Tim down, that he is judging me, comes over me in shame. When
he's around, I doubt the wisdom of having feelings for a zombie. But it's why I
need him. He's like my conscience. I know I won't do anything too stupid if he
comes. I know I shouldn't be alone with Matt, with only children for
accountability. It will be hard to say no to anything without Tim and Harmony
there. If those green eyes asked me to jump into hell, I might. With other
Living ones there, I'd be ashamed of myself for even the smallest sin. Even the
miracle of reuniting with my family isn't worth the risk of losing my soul. Aunty
warned me about Matt. My heart warns me now that I need everyone in this room
to stay together.

Resolved,
I say again, "If they don't come, I don't come."

Matt
makes a disgusted sound and stalks away up the stairs. We hear the old door
upstairs slam as he goes outside.

Tim
looks beaten as he slumps down to the floor. "He's a killer, Ivy, a
murderer. You know that right? He's even a criminal with his own kind! Why was
he in Pravda's prison? If the lost think he's bad—he is!"

"How
can you know that for sure?" I ask.

"He
ran over two people on the way over here!" Tim says in loud disgust.
"Go look at the car! You can see where he smashed into them. There is
blood all over the bumper!"

"Ivy,"
Harmony speaks up for the first time, probably more comfortable now that Matt
is gone. "How can you even ask that question? You know he's a murderer. He
killed me!"

"What!"
Tim asks with confusion and anger.

So
she did remember. She knows what happened.

"He
didn't mean to Harmony." I plead with her to understand that. "He was
trying to save you."

"What
do you mean 'he killed
you'!
" Tim is yelling now
at Harmony.

She
doesn't respond well to yelling and she shrinks back into silence. I tell the
story, emphasizing Matt's heroic efforts and downplaying my part in the whole
thing. I don't mean to speak lightly of what God did for
Harmony,
I just don't want to claim any of the glory for myself. It wasn't anything I
did. God did it.

With
this new information, Tim sits quietly thinking. Finally he speaks. "Okay.
We'll go."

I'm
confused about how that story, which involved Matt and guns and Harmony dying,
has somehow changed his mind.

"God
doesn't work in someone who is out of His will. He wouldn't have used you to
bring Harmony back if you were living outside of His plan for your life.
Even if He wanted Harmony healed.
He only does big things
like that in people who are fully His. This must be His plan for you, Ivy. I
don't think you should go with Matt alone. If you want me to come, of course I
will stay with you. I meant what I said."

He's
referring to his admission of love and I blush and look down at his reiterated
commitment.

"Don't
I get a vote?" Harmony finds the courage to speak again. "I don't
want to go with him!"

Thomas
had been sitting quietly while we argued. His angelic voice chimes in now,
trying to convince Harmony. "Please come with us, Harmony? My brother
isn't bad. He just doesn't know God yet. He's really great when you get to know
him."

"Please,
Harmony," I plead with her, "I need you. Don't you feel it? Can't you
tell God wants you to come with us?"

She
doesn't answer. She puts her head down on her knees and I think maybe she's
praying.

Zombie Robin Hood Boosts
A
Wagon

I
decide to go look for Matt. We need a plan and he needs to know that Tim is
coming. I know Harmony will come too. In all honesty, she's just too chicken to
stay here by herself.

It's
dark outside. It was only a little after noon when we climbed down into the
tunnel. Time is catapulting forward and pulling me along with it. The car Matt
and Tim brought is parked right outside the old house. I wonder how Matt got it
here through the thick
forrest
of weeds that surrounds us. I'm glad he found a way in, but I'm sure it left an
obvious trail—another reason we need to leave here as soon as possible. I find
him sitting in the dented car. The front fender has indeed been damaged and I'm
sure I can trust Tim's story—Matt mowed some zombies down on his short drive
over here.

Matt
chose a car I haven't seen before. It's smaller than the SUV that Aunty and I
always drove. I mentally count the seats to see if we'll all fit. It has a
large bench seat in the front, another bench in the back, and a big open area
in the rear. I think maybe it's called a station wagon. It looks really old and
dated and I hope it's reliable. I know I won't find a little note on the dash
from Maintenance proclaiming their blessing on our trip and promising the car
will run great. I climb in the front seat and sit quietly. I feel like it's Matt's
turn to say something.

"You’re
killing me, Ivy."

"Sorry."

"Are
they both coming?"

"Yes,"
and then I add "Please?"

He
sighs a long, tired, grumpy "I give up" sigh and I'm relieved to hear
him surrender.

"Thank
you," I say and I spontaneously lean over and kiss his cheek. I don't know
why I did it, I've never kissed anyone but family. It's a big deal to me, but
it doesn't seem to mean much to him. He just nods.

"You
better go round them all up. I'm leaving here in 15 minutes."

When
I get out of the car, Tim is standing by the front door of the house. Did he
see me kiss Matt? Is he going to follow me everywhere and stare at me all the
time? I look down instead of at him when I walk past him into the house. He's
announced his love for me, unabashedly. If I want him to come with us, I'm
going to have to live with the fact that he jealously wants my undivided
affection.

He
says my name quietly, like a question, "Ivy?" and I remember my
feelings for him. I remember seeing him in a towel the other day and the
surprising amount of attraction I felt. I'm still touched by how gentle and
caring he was while I sat and cried for Aunty. He looks pretty nice when he
takes off those awful glasses. He's a very good man and I know that I can count
on him for anything. He wants me even though I've been a backstabbing brat. A
very small, minuscule, part of me kind-of wants him back.

I
feel like a lunatic.

I
walk ahead of Tim back down the old stairs into the cellar, and I jump with
surprise as a dark figure pulls
himself
out of the
tunnel. Before I can let out a warning cry, Tim bounds past me, pulls his
brother Andrew to his feet and embraces him. Captain Markowitz has found our
secret cellar. This is a new complication. Should I go get Matt? Andrew looks
around and clears his throat when he sees me. I feel deeply guilty of
everything he's thinking and probably some things he isn't thinking.

"Where's
Matt?" he asks somewhat demanding. He's older than all of us and he has
lived through terrible experiences that have given him wisdom and authority.
Our status here in the house just went from independent grownups to kids. Matt
was right about any of my people joining us. Andrew isn't going to let Matt be
the leader. He may try to stop me and Thomas from going with Matt. And I'm sure
he won't want Tim to go.

"Are
you alone?" I ask instead of answering him. "Is anyone else
safe?" I'm still clinging to the desperate hope that some of our people
could have survived.

"I'm
alone," he says sadly. "I wasn't at the U.R. when they came through
the fence."

"Yeah,
Harmony told us." I tip my head towards her, still sitting in the corner.
She looks up but doesn't smile or speak.

"I
couldn't do anything to save them. There were too many of them. I think some of
our people did get away though. Harmony told me enough on the way to the tunnel
for me to find it myself. It took me awhile to get here without being seen. I
recovered the
entrance,
you had it fairly well
concealed. I don't think they'll find it tonight, but we can't stay here."

"We
aren't staying here. We're going to Atlanta," Tim states with no hint of
doubt and no desire for permission.

"I
see. May I ask why?"

I'm
shocked.

Andrew
treats Tim like an equal? He isn't going to say no? I decide to let Tim handle
his brother and I sit down on the bottom step hoping for the outcome I
desperately need—the six of us leaving here together ASAP.

"Ivy's
father and Colleen's sister are there. Matt met them in
prison
," Tim says with too much emphasis on Matt's
questionable criminal character, "and he says he knows someone who can get
them out."

"So
they are believers?"

"He
didn't say. I guess I'm assuming they are based on the fact that they were in
Pravda's prison," Tim says with a shrug.

"In
a cell near Matt?"
Andrew asks, eyebrows
raised
, pointing out the obvious. Matt isn't
Living
. They might not be.

"Yeah,
I guess we don't know if they are." Tim looks concerned as he realizes
that we don't know anything about them or why they are being held by Pravda.

Listening
to their conversation, I'm struck by their logic and afraid for the worst. I
hadn't really thought about dad and Aunty Betty being one way or the other.
When I last saw them, they had the disease but no symptoms. I was picturing
them healthy because my last memories of them are when they were healthy. But
really, I guess I don't know.

This
new fear weighs on me. I need an answer and I know where I can get one.
Right now.
I stand slowly and walk back up the stairs to
find Matt. Tim and Andrew see me leaving but don't call me back. It's time Matt
knew about our newest complication anyways.