Authors: Danielle Sibarium
The feelings he stirred up; insecurity mixed with unabashed longings
were as exhilarating as they were terrifying to me. But there was something different about him, something I couldn't quite put my finger on, and that made me nervous. Like he was on the verge of losing control, or stealing it back, I wasn't sure which.
"I want you, Carter."
"Yeah?" He stared at me through heavy lidded eyes. "What do you want me to do?"
I swallowed hard, not sure if I liked this game. "I want you to make love to me."
"I'm still not convinced." He held my chin so I couldn't drop my head or turn away, then clasped my bottom lip between his teeth. "Show me," he whispered. "Show me where you want to feel me."
I closed my eyes. Why was he making this so hard for me? I didn't have any issues initiating sex wi
th him, but this was different.
"C'mon Elizabeth," his voice was swathed in seduction. "Don't be shy. You're going to be my wife and I want to make sure I satisfy you, even if I have to do it over and over again. I'm just asking you to show me how."
He turned me around and lifted my dress off me. His hands cupped my breasts as he leaned his body against mine, pressing me against the wall. "I love you. I just want to watch you touch yourself like I do. Show me where you want me. Show me how you want me."
Chapter 52
Carter
I felt much better. That took the edge off. I'd been waiting for that release all day. I smiled at my bride-to-be still sandwiched between me and the living room wall. I coul
dn't seem to get enough of her.
She was quiet.
Too quiet.
"What's wrong?"
Elizabeth shook her head, but her eyes would only meet mine for a second before she looked away.
I stroked her face, her cheeks were still warm. "Hey. I love you, you know that, right?"
She nodded.
"And you know how incredibly hot that was?"
"That's what you keep telling me," she teased.
"Then why are you so quiet and shy all of a sudden?"
She didn't answer. Instead, she sat up and created distance between us.
"Elizabeth, what's wrong?"
She reached across the floor for my shirt and slipped her arms though. I didn't speak as she closed only a few of the buttons in the middle. I knew she had nothing else on underneath and enough cleavage was showing that if my eyes didn't move up to meet hers I'd be ready for round two in no time.
"Watching you touch yourself like that, OMG! What a turn on. I'm getting hard just thinking about it."
"It's not that. Nothing is really wrong. It just sort of hit me, this is your vice. Sex I mean."
"So?"
"I thought it was alcohol, but no, it's definitely sex. Alcohol is what you use when sex isn't an option."
I didn't know where she was going or what she was getting at. This was ridiculous. What did it matter, as long as I was only having sex with her I didn't see the problem.
"Sex is always an option. And as far as vices go, this is a pretty healthy one. It won't rot your liver, or make you fat. And it feels pretty amazing. At least I do my best to make sure you feel amazing."
Finally she cracked a smile. "Of course it's amazing. I just, I don't know why,
but it just makes me nervous."
I pulled her against my chest. This was a conversation that called for cuddling and coddling. "I'll never ask you to do anything you really don't want to. I promise. And I'll never try to hurt you. I'm not into that. I want to make you feel good. I want to make you weak in the knees, not bring you down to them. And anything that happens in the bedroom stays there. I'm not about to go blog about it, or post innuendos on Facebook."
She seemed to relax a little, but I could tell she was still uncomfortable.
"Are we good?"
Her brow crinkled as she looked confused for a moment. "Of course."
"Then what's wrong? Is it . . ." There was only one thing I could think of. "Did you want to take the office manager position?"
"No." She nestled against my chest. "That's the furthest thing from my mind. Besides, I'm perfectly happy doing medical billing. In fact, with Sandy acting so crazy over the last few weeks, if you didn't order me to quit, I might just have done it."
"I never ordered you to quit."
She pulled back to look at me.
"What? I didn't. And I thought we agreed to disagree on this one."
"We did."
"Then why dredge it up? I've had enough to deal with today."
"Did you mean it when you said you wanted me to help at the center?"
"Of course.
I never mentioned it because I thought it was a given."
She gave me a sideward glance. "Are you sure?"
I read between the lines.
"I trust you. Although, I admit, I am a little curious why Sandy had it in for you if you had nothing to do with my father."
"Seems she was in love with him, and like you, she was blindsided by what happened with Jamie." Her shoulders shrugged as she spoke, "I think once he started calling me into his office, to get information about you," she clarified. "Sandy misunderstood and thought it was a repeat of Jamie."
I nodded. Wondering if Sandy and I were making something out of
nothing, or if we both saw something Elizabeth was afraid to admit.
"But I promise you, he's not said or done anything inappropriate. I mean, even firing Sandy, it wasn't because of how she was with me. Well it was, but not that way. She was nasty and mean, and vindictive. And she was firing me."
"Well, we'll see if his word means anything."
Almost on cue, my phone rang. I grabbed my pants, a few feet away from me and reached in the pocket to see who was calling. "It's him."
"You should see what he has to say."
I didn't want to, but she was right. And this wasn't about me and my hurt feelings. If he could arrange for me to speak to the right people, i
t could affect countless lives.
Against my better judgment I accepted the call.
Chapter 53
Elizabeth
I stood up and reached for the mail tossed on the couch while Carter spoke to his father. I was glad things were looking up for them. But the whole sex as a vice bothered me far more than I let on. I couldn't explain to Carter that Mason had the same vice. It would raise too many questions, and I didn't think I could handle talking about Mason tonight.
I carried the mail into the kitchen, so I could sort through it. That's when I noticed a small piece of lined paper peeking out from in between two credit card bills. My stomach fell to the ground when I recognized the handwriting.
Elizabeth,
Call me, we need to talk.
I love you,
Mason
I thought about Violet's warnings. She was right. I needed to come clean about Mason. It wouldn't make a difference anyway. At least it shouldn't. But after the phone call last night, and a hand written note from him now, I couldn't take the chance of him blowing things up for Carter and me.
I wondered how he found me. Getting his hands on my phone number was one thing, coming to my apartment, bordered on stalker. It’s not like I was hiding from him, but I cut all contact before I moved here, before I
even thought about living here.
I crumpled the paper up and opened the kitchen cabinet under the sink to throw it out. That was the moment I felt Carter's arms a
round my waist, making me jump.
"Are you okay?" he laughed.
I couldn't speak, my mouth was too dry and my blood swooshed with speed and purpose through my veins. Instead I nodded, searching for my voice.
"Yeah, fine. Why?"
He turned me around to face him. Unable to meet his eyes, my eyes fell down below his waist. His pants were back on. I couldn't help feeling a hint of disappointment. With those thoughts running through my head I knew I could now take the scrutiny of his eyes.
"You sure?"
I nodded, as I contemplated telling him. I wanted to, I just wasn't sure this was the right time. But if I waited for a right time would it ever come? I finally had him convinced his father wasn't a concern, I hoped. Did I really need to bring up Mason? This was the last thing we needed.
"You just surprised me. I thought you were still on the phone."
"I made it short and sweet. I had enough of him for a lifetime."
He could deny it all he wanted, but he was almost giddy. I never expected him to be in such a good mood tonight. I thought he'd be moody and brooding. Maybe
this really was what he needed.
"What did he say? Did he contact his friends?"
"Yes. Two out of three were interested. I'm meeting them for dinner next week."
I threw my arms around his neck excited for him. I had a good feeling about all of this. "That's wonderful."
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, but since I was coming up short on prospects and banks are so tight with money these days, it's an opportunity. I need to knock this one out of the park."
"You will. I know it!"
"I just hate that it's coming from him. I have half a mind to cancel."
"Don't. Consider it payback.
Retribution for being a crappy parent."
He looked away.
"Will he be there?"
"No. He's just orchestrating the meeting."
"Then he has nothing to do with it, it's all you."
Carter nodded, but I wasn't sure if he was buying into it.
"You know, since tonight has gone better than I expected, I think I'll push my luck one more time. I have a question for you."
I held up the hand with my engagement ring. "Since I already said 'Yes,' you can only be hinting toward one thing, and ‘No,’ I w
on’t let you shoot sex videos."
"You sure about that?
I'd love to direct you." He backed me up against the kitchen counter.
"Yes. I'm sure. Besides, I'm camera shy."
"In that case, I'll have to settle for the live show. And I can't wait to see it night after night. How do you feel about moving in with me? I don't want to wait until we're married. I want you in my bed every night."
"Only if I can redecorate.
You're place is too cold and aloof."
Carter looked around my apartment, “With those?” he asked referring to the posters I framed and hung as decorations.
“Maybe.”
"What do you say we do it together? I can't have you girl the place up too much."
"I think that's a great idea."
"Now what do you say we go to your bedroom for a repeat performance?"
"I'd say ‘What took you so long to ask?’"
Chapter 54
Carter
The week flew by. Aside from celebrating New Year's Eve with Violet and Spike, most of my time was spent going over numbers and tweaking my business plan. I hadn't had any promising prospects since the night I met Elizabeth. Not that I considered that blind date from hell promising, but before I knew I was meeting her instea
d of her father, I was excited.
I only hoped that my father's relationship with these men didn't color their opinion. I wanted a win, but I wanted it on my own merit. I didn't want to owe him. Once we smoothed everything over with Elizabeth's parents, I didn't care if I ever saw him again. I guess in a way that was progress from wanting to never see him again.
I worried that while we were together every night, Elizabeth would complain that I wasn't paying enough attention to her. Luckily that wasn't the case. She knew how much this center meant to me, and offered to help me any way she could.
She was never far, and kept an endless supply of coffee coming my way. She'd sit and read while I worked on my laptop researching the pros and cons of the possible locations, as well as competing facilities. There were none in the state or in the area. None like this anyway.
Only medically based facilities existed.
The morning of the meeting I woke up early. I had too much adrenaline shooting through my veins to sleep. I looked around my bathroom before getting into the shower. Different hairbrushes, perfume and makeup were sprinkled across the countertop. I smiled, knowing this was the tip of the iceberg. She hadn't even begun to bring over "decorative" items or more than the next day’s clothes.
Still damp from the shower, I went back to the bedroom and looked at Elizabeth still asleep in bed. I thought of waking her for a before-work-romp-in-bed, but we'd have plenty of time for that. Instead I chose to dress and start on breakfast. With everything in my life feeling like it was finally falling in place, I wanted to do something sweet for her.
The house was overrun by the smell of cinnamon and bacon. I never pan fried it for myself, but for her the ext
ra effort was worth the reward.
Once breakfast was ready, I went back to the bedroom to check on her. She was still asleep. I gently brushed her che
ek with the back of my fingers.