It Matters To Me (The Wandering Hearts Book 2) (25 page)

I press my lips against the top of her head. Her hand comes to rest on my chest, and suddenly I’m no longer thinking about that damn condom. I am thinking about how perfectly we fit together. She drapes a leg across my stomach, the wet heat between her legs now pressed against my hip.

“So—” I start softly, pausing to sigh. “That was frustrating.”

I feel her body jerk with laughter. “How about we try again when we get back to the hotel?”

“This wasn’t just a spur of the moment thing?” Immediately I wish I hadn’t asked the question since I am unsure I want her answer.

“I mean, I didn’t plan to get you in the sack if that’s what you’re asking.” She giggles at her own sense of humor.

I smile. “Well, at least you find yourself entertaining.”

“Oh come on, it was funny.”

“Nope.”

“It was a little funny,” she argues.

“All right, maybe a little.”

“And to answer your question, I thought you were freaking hot the night we met at the diner, and then, oh God, the day in your studio and the puppy poo incident.”

I feel my face flush red. “Ugh, the fact that you can even include the words puppy poo incident and me in the same sentence is pretty mortifying.”

She’s laughing again. I wish I could make her laugh every single second of the day. When I make her laugh it’s as if I could take on the world.

“God, you’re beautiful,” I nearly whisper when she falls silent.

“Hey, that’s sexual harassment,” she taunts.

“Oh, I think as far as sexual harassment goes I am pretty much royally screwed at this point.”

“That’s what she said,” Kenzie cries before cackling. Her eyes are watering now.

“You’re not right.”

“You’re the one who likes me,” she points out. “What’s that say about you?”

I use my free hand to lift her chin so that our eyes meet. I want her to know I’m not kidding anymore, and I mean every word I am about to say. “That I have impeccable taste in women.”

She stares back up at me. She’s not laughing. I’m suddenly afraid I’ve come on too strong. Until I feel her hand slip from my chest and wrap around my stiffness. “An hour back to the city?”

“Uh-huh.” I breathe.

“Then we better get a move on,” she smiles before flying into action and getting redressed in a small space faster than I ever thought humanly possible.

I
HAVE NEVER GROPED AND
teased someone more than I did on that ride back to the hotel. The satisfaction it continually gave me to bring him to the brink of climaxing, only to pull back. Aiden’s warnings about the punishment which would be awaiting me when we got to the hotel if I continued to taunt him only served to encourage me.

Despite discovering there was an issue with the air conditioning unit in his room, we simply couldn’t wait any longer. After having to make a pit stop at the lobby shop for condoms, we both couldn’t contain our excitement any longer. In fact, I’m not sure we even noticed how hot it was once we got started. I can still feel his hands all over me. My skin tingles at the memory of him. We spent the entire day in my bed. Well, technically the bed, the floor, the shower, then the bed again.

When Anna advised me to get to know him better, I am not sure this is what she had in mind. Somehow, I have a feeling she would approve based on the fact that I feel like my heart might burst out of my chest.

I was happy when I was with Ben, but this … it feels like I’m going crazy. It’s not soft like a fairy tale. It’s hot, intense, maddening, and I can’t get enough of him. Everything I’d been fighting since I met him no longer needed to be pushed down, and buried.

He shifts next to me, our bodies tangled in the sheets. I lift my eyebrows, and he laughs. “What?” I ask innocently.

“I know that look,” he grins.

“Oh yeah? Just what look do I have?”

“A look that says I better order room service. I’m gonna need some protein to keep up with you.”

I snicker devilishly and curl my body around his, his nakedness spooning me, an arm draped over my side. No matter which way I lie with him, the pieces line up perfectly. I lift a hand and intertwine my fingers with his, staring at the lines on his hands. His fingers are slender but strong, and I’m in awe of the instruments of pleasure. He seems to know all the right places to touch me. I try not to focus on the fact that he must have a lot of experience.

“I should probably go back to my room,” I say at last.

“I don’t think that’s what you want.”

“You don’t know me well enough to know what I want,” I make sure my tone is flirtatious.

“Based on your moans all day long I think I have a pretty good idea of what you want,” he say wrapping his arms tighter around me, his lips resting on the cradle where my neck meets my shoulder. His warm breath on my flesh causes me to tremble.

I feel weak in my body’s current position, like whatever he tells me to do I would have to obey. I love this feeling of being enveloped by him. Owned by his grasp and his lips.

“I have a lot of work to get done. Do you even realize how many pictures we’ve taken this week? There’s so much editing in front of me,” I explain.

His lips shift from my shoulder to my ear where he whispers, “Guess what? I know your boss, and he says you can have the day off.”

I can’t help but smile. He’s the one that moves. He tugs on my shoulder, and I roll onto my back, staring up into his blue eyes. They look gray in the dim light of the room, and I can see for the first time he’s looking for something. I’m not sure what, but it’s there, looking at me through the storm in his irises. Redemption maybe?

He lifts his chin and his lips press against my forehead. My stomach does a thousand flips, and just from the simple caress of him against me, I feel like I am standing on a cliff’s edge, ready to soar over to the valley below.

He takes my face and cups it with his free hand. “You’re different,” he whispers at last.

I shake my head slightly, a mischievous grin on my face as I stare up at him. “Like scary guy in a clown costume different or David Bowie different?”

He tilts his head at me, “I’m not sure what the difference is.”

“Well scary clown costume guy is just weird and creepy, but David Bowie is an iconic trendsetter,” I explain, completely serious as I do so.

“Oh,” he releases my face and takes a moment to think about it.

“Really?” I give him a gentle knee to the side. “You have to think about it that long?”

Wincing he flops onto his side next to me and laughs, protecting his important bits and pieces. “You’re a David Bowie. There’s no question.”

“Good!” I exclaim boldly. “I’m glad we agree.”

His laughter slows, and he exhales a huge sigh. “But what I mean is you’re different like my mom was.”

I swallow hard. His mom. The kidnapping. It’s always been a topic I was curious about, but never something I wanted to bring up. He certainly has never had an interest in discussing her since initially bringing the matter up at the swimming pool. I suppose things are different now. A lot of things are different now.

I turn and face him, waiting for him to continue, but instead he lifts a hand and strokes my lips with his fingertips. My belly aches as I see that searching look in his eyes again.

“If you ask my father, you’re nothing like my mother because as he recalls her, she was a raving mad woman.” Aiden’s tone changes when he says the word father. His contempt for the man is more than clear. “I wish I had more memories of her.”

My heart begins to pound. I fear I might say the wrong thing, but it’s clear he wants to talk. I think for a second he looks like he might cry, but then the misty haze disappears as quickly as it came.

“How old were you when she died?” I ask. I read everything Google had to offer on the story, but those were just articles. Impersonal. They had no idea who Aiden or his mother truly were. I had no idea when I read them. Sometimes, when I look at him I completely forget about the demons in his past.

“Two and a half.”

I breathe in a sharp breath. His whole face transforms, a deep sadness filling his eyes. I want to say something to comfort him, but I don’t know how to. There was nothing I could do or say when Ben’s brother died.

“I’m sorry,” I offer at last.

“When I was younger, I used to try and lock it all away behind these massive iron gates in my mind, but all that did was make it hard to see who the enemy was.”

“The enemy?” I ask. “You mean, like the kidnappers?”

He shakes his head, then looks at me again. “No, the Andersons,” he continues. “My mom trusted them.”

“And then they just took you?” I inquire.

“She gave me to them.”

“Wait what?” I gasp. “What do you mean, she gave you to them?”

“She knew Janet and Dale from when she was in college,” he looks in my eyes, and I can tell there are so many secrets he wants to tell me, but he’s torn. Secrets he’s scared to tell.

“You don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to,” I remind him.

I can feel his eyes fixed on me. “My dad always told me there was never a greater pain in the world than losing a child.”

“It sounds like he cares for you.”

“He’s a liar,” Aiden clarifies. “The greatest pain for my father is being defied.” I think of reassuring him, of comforting him and telling him how I’m sure his father loves him, but I don’t. I don’t know his father, and there is obviously something very broken in their relationship. Things I doubt I could ever fully understand.

“And your mother defied him?” I ask.

His chest rattles with a hitched breath, and I can feel him tremble as the wave of emotions washes over him, crashing hard against his soul. “He couldn’t punish her, so he made sure Dale Anderson paid the price. He spent twenty years of his life behind bars because he tried to help my mom and me.”

“He’s out?” The question tumbles out of my mouth.

He nods his head, “Dale claimed his wife was innocent and he was behind the entire thing. The prosecutor said if they both copped to it then they would each receive a reduced sentence. He wouldn’t do it. He was released three years ago.”

“Wow, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I can’t imagine what they were thinking.”

“Who, Dale and Janet? They were trying to help. By the time Dale was released my father and I pretty much had no relationship. After Dale was released, I decided to go and see them.”

“Alone?” I gasp.

“My dad’s version of events about the entire thing just weren’t adding up. I wanted answers. I had to have them.”

“Anyone would,” I assure him.

“As soon as Janet opened the door, and I saw the look in her eyes, I knew everything I’d been told were lies,” he explains. “There wasn’t some monster lurking there on the other side of that door.”

“So you weren’t kidnapped?”

“It was all more of my father’s lies to save face. Better to be the victim than a fool. My mother decided to leave my father, but she couldn’t stand the thought of leaving me with him. She was confident he would never stop until he found us,” his chest heaves and I want to be able to take his pain away. He swallows, forcing a lump down his throat. “She asked Dale and Janet if they would keep me and raise me.”

“They agreed to take you knowing what she planned to—” I can’t bear to finish my thought. I uncurled Aiden’s hand and began to trace the shape of his hand on my hip, wishing he would say something, anything.

“They had no idea what she was going to do to herself,” he says at last in an almost whisper. “She told them she was going to run and throw my father off her trail. Once she was certain he couldn’t trace her communications, she would send word … they never heard from her again.”

His jaw relaxes, and a tear escapes down my check settling on his chest. “I’m so sorry.”

He shifts, forcing me to move away from him. Sitting upright he tilts his head and looks into my eyes, at first expressionless.

“What is it?” I whisper.

He lifts a single hand, cupping my face, wiping away the trail of the tears with his thumb.

“I’ve never talked to anyone besides Dale and Janet about what happened to me or my mother,” he begins. “It never felt safe enough to.”