Just a Little Faith (29 page)

 

After Pax's move into
the Intensive Care Unit
,
her
parents arrived in the ICU waiting area
, the Richards not far behind
.

“Seb! What can you tell us?”

Embracing each one of them, he motioned for them to sit down.

“Dr. Kohler seems to think it's only a matter of time before she will regain
consciousness,
but to be on the safe side he wants to keep her in
the
ICU.”

Janet leaned against her husband while Brad
put his arms around her. “When can we see her?”

“The next visiting session is in fifteen minutes
.
They limit the number of visitors to two at a time
, so you and Brad please go. I know
you're
anxious to see her.”

Tori's gasp caused them all to look in her direction. “The cats! You know Pax will be worried sick about them when she wakes up. I'll go
check on them
. I'll
call later to see how she's doing
and
come back in the morning with breakfast for everyone.”

“Thank you
,
Tori. You know my daughter too well.”

“It's nothing, Mrs. Taylor. She would do the same for me.”

“Wait
, I'll walk out with you
.” Michael motioned to Tori.
“
Seb
,
c
all me if there's any change, okay?”

“
I will.”

“Thanks. We'll see you all in the morning.”
Michael followed Tori out of the room.

Seb noticed a small mob of people
gathering
outside the ICU waiting area.
Excusing himself
,
Seb walked toward the door
.
Linc and Rangy le
d
several of his teammates into
the waiting area.

“Seb. We got down here as soon as the game ended. What's the latest on Pax?”

Comforted by
his
teammate
s
'
arrival, h
e introduced them to Paxson's parents
,
and again detailed all the information
he knew
so far.

Filling every available seat, the sound in the room heightened with additional murmured conversations.

Linc tapped Seb on the knee. “How are you doing
,
man? I know thi
s is so tough for you right now
.” He motioned
toward Rangy
.
“
What
can we do to help? Anything?”

“
I'm
doing okay
, thanks guys
. I have moments where
I'm
fearful and angry
,
but then I realize those emotions won't do Pax any good.
I'm
just trying to remain positive, Linc.”

“You seem different man.
I
n the last few days, something
'
s changed with you. You're calmer or more peaceful or something.”

Sebastian smiled
at his friend
. “I
do
.
I
had some moments of refl
ection you might say
,
and I
decided I needed to make some changes in my life. That's why Pax has got to get better. I need to tell her I wouldn't be here
if it wasn't for her
.”

Linc slung his arm around Seb's neck. “She's going to be just fine
,
my friend. Just you wait and see.”

Sebastian hoped with everything in him his friends were correct.

****

The last visiting time came and went
with
no change in Paxson's condition.

Mrs. Richards placed her hand on
her friend's
shoulder. “Janet, you and Brad look exhausted. Why don't you come on back to the house with us? No one can visit until the morning
,
and you'll do better if you get some rest.”

Seb nodded in agreement. “That's a good idea, Janet. I'll stay here just in case something comes up. I'll call if you need to come back.”

“
I
f there is the slightest change in her condition,
you call. Promise me
.”

“I promise.”
Pax
's
mother p
att
ed
his cheek with her hand
, and
a tired smile
crossed her features
. “I'm glad you two found your way back to each other.” Giving him a kiss on the cheek, she allowed Brad to lead her out of the waiting room.

Linc
and
Rangy
,
as well as Seb's other friends
,
also decided to call it a night
,
promis
ing
to check in.

Sebastian settled down in
one of
the waiting room
recliners
and thought about the past few months
and the changes in his life.
Back when last season ended
,
his biggest
decision in life was
which bar
he would visit
and what girl
he would go out
with. Meeting Pax at LLS changed all that.
E
ven when he fought his anger and sadness issues after his injury and slipped back into his former way of life, he still
couldn't stop thinking about
Pax.
N
o matter what he tried to do
, her face never left his mind.

Then last night
,
while in his office pondering exactly what his future held, it all came to a head.
The feeling of helplessness he couldn't play ball, the pain he
i
nflicted on Pax
,
and the hopelessness of knowing once again
,
his girls were gone wreaked havoc with this mental state. He felt
his life
spiraling out of control.

Pacing around his desk,
he noticed the box of baseballs in the corner of his office.
A wash of memories rushed over him. H
e and Pax
visiting
the hospital and g
iving
out all those autographed balls. The joy it brought to
the children's
lives transform
ed their sickly faces into bright beams of light
. They fac
ed
life-threatening illness
es
and
still had the strength to smile.

He r
eflected to his time at the
beach with Pax
while
griev
ing
for his daughters
and how she described the ocean as an example of
God's love around her.
T
he kindness of the man he didn't even know at the little church in San Diego who told him he was praying for his family as they we
nt through such a terrible time replayed in his mind.

These thoughts brought Sebastian to tears. How selfish he had been! Ever since his injury
,
he blocked out all the people who cared the most. Even more than that
,
Sebastian used his injury as an excuse to not help those who
dealt with harder struggles in life than he could possibly imagine
. Who was he to moan and complain over a simple knee surgery? Sure the recovery
took a
long
time
, but his life
did
n
'
t hang
in the balance
.
Yes, his daughters had been taken from him in a tragic accident
and
he knew he would
never fill the hole left in his heart
,
but he had other friends and loved ones still here.

Sebastian looked
at
the corner of the desk
at the
book he'd left there so long ago
. The same b
ook
he pushed aside so many times, hiding f
rom its contents
,
choosing rather to ignore it than read it.

He reached across the desk and feather
ed
the pages
of the Bible Pax gave him
, gently pulling
each one a
part
carefully
. He didn't even know where to start and just decided to flip through until something caught his eye. The pages fell open to a book called
Ecclesiastes
. He
'
d never heard the word
before
,
but something about it made him stop
to
peruse the chapters.
Beginning
with chapter one
he
read the words of
someone called
“
the Preacher, the Son of David, king in Jerusalem
.
”
Sebastian didn't know exactly who this preacher
could be
, but what he read fascinat
ed him
.
Seb
saw
himself in the description. He
'
d done all this man spoke of.
Searching high and low
,
he cheered
himself with wine.
B
uilt a large house and gathered for himself silver and gold and had been with many women
, b
ut what had all of this gotten him? Nothing.

He kept reading and feeling more and more like the man in this book.
“
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up
.”
Seb thought about how he shut Paxson out from helping him after his injury. He shunned the one person who could have helped him the most.

Turning
page after page
he came to the end
.
H
is heart
cut to the quick
when he read:
The end of the matter; all has been heard. Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgment, with every secret thing, whether good or evil.

Sebastian closed the book and
stared out the window. “This book could have been written about me. I have wasted so many opportunities chasing after the wind. What a fool I have been
.
”

At that moment, Seb did something he
'
d never done before.

He prayed.

 

Waiting
for dawn to break,
Sebastian prayed again. He prayed that God would spare Paxson any further complications. He
asked
for the doctors
to make the
right decisions in her care. He
begged
that she would wake up
,
and no matter what happened
,
he would be able to deal with it.

When morning came,
Sebastian felt refreshed
and
amazed at
what spending a night in prayer could do.
He
felt ready to face another day of what he hoped
to be
good news.
As he stood
up to
stretch
,
an announcement over the loud speaker
caught his attention
.

“Those with the Taylor family please come to the front desk for a phone call.”

Sebastian hurried to the reception area. “I'm with the Taylor family…”

The receptionist motioned to the phone on the wall near the desk. “If you will
go to
that phone I
'
ll transfer the call to you.”

Seb picked up the phone
.
“This is Sebastian Quinn, I'm with the Paxson Taylor family.”

“Yes
,
Mr. Quinn. This is Rachel one of the ICU nurses; Dr. Kohler wanted me to call you. He thinks Paxson is becoming alert.
C
ome up to the ICU area, use the phone outside the door and someone will let you in to see her.”

“Thank you
,
Rachel. Thank you so much. I will be up as soon as I can.”

Replacing the handset, he left his hand on the phone
. R
esting his head on his outstretched arm
, his heart lightened
.
Thank you
,
Lord!

Taking his cell phone out of his pocket
,
he quickly called
her
parents
. He
shared the news
as he
ma
de
his way to ICU.
S
tepp
ing
off the elevator
,
he
picked up the
ICU
phone
when a
buzz
opened
the door
. Rushing around
the corner
toward Pax's room
,
he
met Dr. Kohler.

“Dr. Kohler… the nurse said
you're
seeing some positive signs?”

“We are
,
Mr. Quinn. I think it will only be a matter of time before Paxson will regain consciousness.
I thought it best to have someone familiar in the room
.”

“I won't leave her side.”

E
nter
ing
the room
, he
sat in the chair next to her bed.
Did he
r
eyelids
flutter
?
Unsure
if what he was seeing
could be
real or just what his heart wanted
, h
e
lifted
her hand
and
caress
ed
it
.
R
ubb
ing
his fingers up and down her arm,
he
realiz
ed the motion soothed him as much as
her.

Sebastian remained in the same position over the next hour
,
c
ontinu
ally
rub
bing
her arm and look
ing
for signs of consciousness
.
His head nodded periodically
as
exhaust
ion
overwhelm
ed
him. R
est
ing
his head on her bed
, he closed his eyes and suddenly
felt a twitch
beneath
his hand.
Sitting up
,
he
ran his fingers down
Paxson's
cheek
.
S
till
,
there
seemed to be no change in her
condition
.

Rather than sleep, he began to speak to her
,
telling her
how he
came
close to giving up as the grief and sadness overwhelmed him. He told her how the box of autographed balls in the corner of his office reminded him of their visit to see the kids. He spoke of their time in San Diego, Arizona
,
and Florida and the joy she brought to his life and how h
e missed her.

He
whispered in her ear. “I opened the
Bible
you gave me. I knew the man in Ecclesiastes, Pax. The book could have been written about me
.
I
too liv
e
a life of vanity.
Please open your eyes
,
Pax. I need you more than ever.”

H
e buried his face in her side and cried as he begged God to please heal her
.
It's not just for me God. Pax needs to get back to her life
at LLS
helping others
. She does so much good
,
dear Lord. Please
strengthen her body
so she can come back to me, to all of us. And if
You're
willing God, give me one more chance at happiness
.

Once again
,
he
felt a twitch under his hand.
Lifting his head
,
a sea of tears
ran down his face
.
B
eautiful
turquoise
eyes looked back at him.

“Paxson… sweetheart. You came back to me
.
”