Authors: L J Dee
“Charlotte”.
The harshness
of his tone snapped me
back from my serene state, much more quickly than I’d wanted, like being yanked
from the middle of a terrific dream by a piercing alarm clock all too soon on a
Monday morning. “I’m sorry” I said sheepishly and apologetically, hoping it
might buy me some leniency. “I didn’t mean to but when you said that, it just
happened”. “I own your orgasms now Charlotte and I
am
not happy that you came without me” he growled. “I came because of you” I shot
back, thinking the whole thing was a little unfair. “I am dissatisfied with
your behaviour Charlotte and I will deal with you tomorrow”. The phone went
dead. What? No, I screamed inwardly, my heart pounding, I had tried but I
couldn’t help it. He had been teasing me all day. What was the plan? To take me
to the edge and then make me wait? I called back but he didn’t answer and after
the third time I’d tried to no avail, I gave up, settling on a text I was sure
he wouldn’t respond to.
I’m so sorry Sir x
Even
in my drunken state, I realised that the unhappiness and guilt I felt at
displeasing Jason King by having an accidental orgasm was way over the top and
utterly illogical. It didn’t matter, I couldn’t think of anything else. I was
desperate to speak to him, to apologise, to take my punishment and move on, whatever
it took. He knew I was impatient, it was one of the lessons he’d been trying to
teach me and that’s when I got it, and laughed out loud.
Patience.
The very virtue I seemed utterly incapable
of,
and I
had proved that point once again. His plan was probably to arouse me to a state
of absolute desperation so tomorrow I would come on sight. Jesus Christ I
smiled to myself. Knife play I could handle, but I wasn’t sure I could ever
wait that long for an orgasm. I drifted off to sleep eventually, a little bit
frightened and a lot excited over the punishment King would deem fit for my
little misdemeanour. He didn’t text back.
Chapter
12
It
was a funny, strange mind game and I was still reeling in the morning when I
woke up, nervous about what would happen when I saw him and knowing that in
order to feel better, I would have to take my punishment. I knew ultimately
that the one thing that would make it OK was making him happy, and that was the
strangest feeling of all. I had never had a relationship like this, and it was
such an unusual dichotomy of feelings that it was hard for my logical brain to
come to terms with.
In the end I gave up trying to rationalise it
and knowing that in order to get through the day and focus on anything other
than pleasing Jason King I would have to ‘Smith up’. I would be hard pressed to
concentrate on work today, I knew that much, and that was not part of the deal.
Being naughty and taking punishments was fine when we were together but this I
didn’t like at all. Maybe I would have to try harder at patience I smiled
inwardly. Despite myself I decided to wear the necklace for work, in case I saw
him straight afterwards. Hopefully it was a gesture that might appease him for
my impromptu orgasm I smiled to myself, swearing that when I shut my office
door, all thoughts of Jason King would be banished, and I would concentrate on
the vast pile of work on my desk.
It
didn’t happen, and by 10.30am I was so agitated, I needed a distraction that I
hoped would come in the form of a sub-committee meeting at the little cafe I
loved so much. I rang Sasha, then Katie and we all put a note on our systems
alerting anyone who cared to look to our whereabouts, and the deed was done. I
was the first one over there, and my heart sank when I realised the King
Marketing contingent had had exactly the same idea. Shit. Jason ignored me as I
found us a table as far away as possible. I couldn’t help but gaze at him as I
made my way towards a booth for four in the corner by the window, my heart
pounding in my mouth but he didn’t so much as look up from the report he was
going over with two of his execs. I swallowed hard and sat with my back to him,
staring at the table. I would have to wait for Sasha or Katie to go up for the
drinks, as a huge piece of triple chocolate cake and a cup of tea with five
sachets of sugar appeared in front of me and I gazed up.
“Hi”
I smiled as he slid into the booth opposite me, throwing me a steely gaze that
made me shudder deliciously whilst simultaneously filling me with dread, it was
an intoxicating mix. “What’s this?” I smiled as he stared at me intensely, his
eyebrows
raised
as he took in the necklace before
pushing the cake towards me. “I imagine you’re having a five sugar day Smith”
he growled and I couldn’t argue. He was absolutely right. Strangely, I felt
slightly better that he’d said it. Maybe it was normal to feel this way about
upsetting your Dom. I was half thinking I was going mad, after all, I was
hardly responsible for third world debt, I had simply had an orgasm by accident.
“I’m sorry Jason, what are you going to do?” I asked quietly as I heard the
chatter of Katie and Sasha coming into the cafe. “Atonement” he said simply,
rising from the booth, greeting them both in a much friendlier way than he’d
greeted me, as they bounded happily into their seats. I sat staring at my cake
with my heart in my mouth.
‘Atonement’.
It was only
the second time in my life I had heard the word and the first time had been far
from pleasant.
I
didn’t have any time to dwell on it. “What’s up with you
Lotty
?
It’s Monday morning and already a five sugar day, what’s Alison done now?” she
laughed as I forced a smile back. They knew enough about Jason and this was one
particular embarrassing incident I wasn’t happy to share. “King brought it over,
he must have thought I looked like I needed it” I laughed gently. “Well if you
don’t I’m more than happy to help out” she laughed back, picking up my fork and
tucking right in. “What do you girls want then, my treat?” I smiled, needing a
couple of minutes to compose myself. The whole ‘atonement’ thing had unnerved
me slightly. “Cupcake with peanut butter icing and a tea”
grinned
Sasha while Katie pointed at mine to indicate she wanted her own. “And a
coffee” she tried for with a mouthful of cake and I couldn’t help but giggle.
I
cast my eyes over Jason as I walked past towards the counter. He looked up
briefly, saying nothing and then looking quickly away. So that’s how it was
going to be today. I was suffering and he was making it worse. I ordered the coffee,
tea and cakes for the girls, picking up the tray and making a pointed effort to
walk slowly past his table as his raised his eyes to meet mine. I couldn’t
resist and stuck my tongue out at him in a childish gesture, trying hard not to
giggle at the returned raised eyebrows and look of mild shock. I felt sure it
wasn’t the way I was supposed to behave, but I was damned if I was carrying
this level of anguish around with me all day. Atonement would come soon enough.
After
way too much sugar and feeling ever so slightly sick, I had discovered that the
barrister had indeed bought Sasha the new car she had joked about. It was a
convertible mini in black and red which she loved, and he had dominated her all
night before suggesting they go on a mini break to Monte Carlo. He had two
huge, high profile cases that would be keeping him busy for a least six months
and she was so excited it was impossible not to be happy for her. Katie had
been up front with Robbie and they’d had the most amazing night of passion, and
both were keen to know about me and Jason. “I didn’t see him last night” I said
simply and left it at that.
I
hadn’t been back in the office long when I received the email. I had managed a
whole fifteen minutes not worrying about King when his name appeared in my
inbox,
and my heart was in my mouth.
Dear Charlotte
From the slightly hysterical way you
behaved in the cafe, I can only assume your impatience for your punishment is
getting the better of you. I think you already know how unhappy I am, and I find
it hard to believe you would try and make your situation any worse than it
currently is.
When you need your atonement,
be
waiting on the steps of my house and let me know you are
there. I will come when I’m ready.
Jason
Oh. That had
put the whole thing right back at the front of my mind. He wasn’t deciding, or
leaving it to
chance,
he was leaving it to me. Maybe I
would play him at his own game and not turn up today, or even tomorrow. Who was
I kidding? I called Alison and told her I needed to go to the doctors. I’d
worked well over my allocated hours in the last few weeks and had done three
times the workload of any of my executive peers. One afternoon off was a small
request and I couldn’t wait any longer, I was going now. Before I left, I sent
a quick email, which I hoped might redeem my ‘slightly hysterical’ behaviour.
King
I was being ‘Smith’ in the cafe and
you can’t punish me for that. Your rules, not mine.
Smith ;)
I deleted the
received and sent emails just in case of prying eyes as my computer was always
open, and disappeared, hailing a taxi to Kings
house
where I sat on the cold stone steps of the huge Victorian town house, wondering
what the hell I had gotten myself into.
I’m at your house x
I guessed
even Jason would be surprised at the speed of that, but I knew he was getting
used to my impatience. I couldn’t wait any longer, there was no point. I
couldn’t concentrate at work, unable to focus on anything else and I knew when
I’d taken whatever punishment he deemed suitable, I would be sated and
satisfied and all being well, basking in the afterglow of multiple orgasms from
the skilled lover I had started to enjoy a little too much. I didn’t receive a
text back, but it was the middle of the working day, so what the hell did I expect.
The man was responsible for running King Marketing and for all I knew he could
be absolutely anywhere.
‘Atonement’.
The word resonated in my brain as
memories of the first and only other time I’d heard it, raced through my mind.
I had been four years old and it was my second day at Newtown Primary
School.
It was the first time I had ever
left the safety and sanctuary of the children’s home and I had been utterly
terrified. The place seemed huge and overwhelming and I didn’t know a single
soul in my class. Some of the children from the home went to the school, but
they were all in the years above me and although they seemed to like it, I felt
alone, out of place, and different to the other kids. The only saving grace and
my personal ray of sunshine was
Franny
Hall, a chubby
little girl with sticky out ears, an angelic smile and row upon row of soft
blonde curls, who had offered me a seat next to her on my very first day. I
suspected
Franny
harboured the same fears and
insecurity about school as I did, and so we played and laughed through those
first tentative hours and stuck together like glue.
I’d
been daydreaming in afternoon story time on that fateful second day when the
fearsome Mrs Black had asked me a question.
Franny
in
her
kindness,
whispered the answer to me and I shouted
it out as Mrs Black strode purposefully towards me with a face like thunder and
all but dragged me to my feet. “Did
Franny
Hall tell
you that answer?” She had scowled at me as I stood trembling and shaking my
head. Mrs Black, with the pinched face and evil eyes, decided to make an
example of Charlotte Smith, daydreamer and liar, and pulled me to the front of
the class, picking me up and putting me in the waste paper basket. “You are a
naughty girl Charlotte Smith, and this is your atonement. You will stand in
that bin with the rest of the rubbish until I say otherwise”.
I remembered the terrifying harshness of her
words even now. All the class with the exception of my chubby little friend were
laughing and pointing, as I stood there shaking and red-faced, forced to make
amends for my misbehaviour. The feeling had been abhorrent and as far as I was
concerned, utterly unjustified. My confidence was already wavering, and on that
day, the vile Mrs Black had shattered it completely. For the following two
nights I had wet the bed, and when Hannah
Devey
saw
me sitting in the corner of the children’s home playroom on a rainy Thursday
after school, quiet, withdrawn and nothing like the bubbly little bundle of
energy she was used to, she had asked me what was wrong.
I
loved Hannah
Devey
, she was my favourite of the
helpers that would come into the home a couple of times a week, and with her
blue spiked hair and soft grey eyes, I had thought her the most beautiful,
exotic creature I had ever seen. Her nickname was Satan, but I didn’t know what
that meant, and to me she was the kindest, funniest grown-up playmate a little
girl could have.
She always took the
time to play with me, not stick by the pool table shooting pockets with the
other helpers and she called me ‘chuckles’ which always made me laugh. Hannah
Devey
had worn a collar, I smiled to myself, adjusting my
numbing bottom on the cold stone steps and toying with my necklace. In
hindsight, it was probably more of a punk fashion statement than a sexual one.
Hannah
Devey
was the least likely submissive I could
ever imagine.