Authors: Heidi Hutchinson
Lenny paused and
turned on the third step, staring at Duke dumbly.
“
They’re
gonna be here soon-” He tried to speak calmly, looking at her
not ready for guests appearance.
“
How
soon?” Lenny asked.
As if on cue, the
front doorbell rang and Lenny’s eyes widened at him. “No,
Duke. Whoever it is, tell them I’m sick or dead or something.”
But there was no
time, a young boy came racing into the kitchen and grabbed Duke
around his middle.
“
Hey!”
Duke greeted the boy and hugged him back briefly. Lenny watched
with the eyes of a woman who thought she might be losing her mind.
Before she could process the child’s presence, a tall, black
haired beauty entered the room with an apologetic smile.
“
Sorry,
Tyler figured out the door was unlocked.”
“
That’s
okay.” Duke answered her with a smile. What was that in his
eyes? Adoration? He was beaming at this stranger in Lenny’s
kitchen as if he had known her for years. And she was looking at him
the same way.
What is going on?
Is the boy Duke’s? How long have I been asleep? Am I even here
anymore or did I finally die and I’m a ghost watching my
friends and family move on with their lives?
“
Hi,
you must be Lenny. Duke has told me so much about you.” The
raven haired woman reached her hand out.
So
they can see me, that rules out ghost.
Lenny stepped down into the kitchen, adjusted her milk and cookies
into one arm and shook the tall woman’s hand. She knew she was
gaping but she really couldn’t stop. She had high cheek bones
and the straightest, shiniest, blackest hair Lenny had ever seen.
Her scent filled the kitchen, Lenny couldn’t place the
fragrance but it was warm and intoxicating. Not overpowering, but
comforting, like a blanket that Lenny wanted to wrap up in and sleep
forever.
“
Lenny,
this Natalie Rodgers. Her father was Colonel Henry Clay, her and her
son, Tyler, are moving up to the Clay cabin.” Duke introduced
proudly.
“
Oh,”
was all Lenny could get out.
Duke shifted
uncomfortably as he waited for Lenny to say more. He grimaced again
at her appearance and she knew this was not her best look.
“
I’m
sorry for my…” Lenny looked down at herself,
“Hideousness,” she finished.
Natalie gave her a
smile as warm as sunshine. “Don’t apologize, I’ve
been there.” She was so gracious that it caused Lenny to want
to fling herself into the woman’s arms and start sobbing all
over again.
“
Are
you the girl that can fly?” Tyler inquired with wondering
eyes.
Lenny turned her
gaze on the young boy and felt tears start to form in the back of her
eyes. “I used to be,” she choked out.
Duke grabbed Tyler
around the shoulders and turned him around. “Let’s go see
if we can find a snowboard your size, what do ya say?”
“
Okay!”
Tyler agreed amicably with the distraction.
Duke glanced over
his shoulder, “Nat, can you try to get her to shower
or...something?” He motioned his head in Lenny’s
direction and Natalie nodded at him.
As the guys
disappeared into the other room, Lenny continued staring at the
gorgeous woman in her kitchen. She studied her openly and shoved
another cookie in her mouth. Maybe she was some sort of angel. Or
mystical princess.
“
How
about we get some real food in you.” Natalie said and took
away the package of cookies. She removed her coat, hat and gloves,
setting them aside. Then she went to the fridge and effortlessly
whipped up eggs, sausage and toast presenting it to Lenny who had
managed to shuffle to the counter and sit on a stool. She was still
staring.
“
Where
did you come from?” Lenny finally asked as she apathetically
shoveled food into her mouth.
“
My
car broke down and Shawn towed us into town.”
“
Shawn?
You call him
Shawn
?”
Lenny was incredulous. And weirdly jealous. Duke was hers, she'd
never had to share him with anyone before.
“
Well,
that’s his name,” Natalie smiled.
“
He’s
always been Duke to me, I guess.” Lenny mumbled. Shawn? That
was new. This whole thing was new. So, was this woman Duke’s
girlfriend? She had a different last name than her dad, she was
probably married. Was she going to get Duke killed?
“
Are
you married?” Lenny asked bluntly.
“
Widowed.
My husband was a Marine. He died in combat three years ago.”
Natalie poured Lenny a glass of orange juice.
Lenny swallowed
hard. Now she felt like a vile wretch. “Sorry.”
“
It’s
all right.” Natalie leaned across the counter on her elbows
and looked Lenny in the eye. “Bad break up?” She asked
with such compassion that Lenny started to cry again.
Natalie came around
the side of the counter and gently hugged Lenny to her side. Lenny
sank against her. She didn’t know this woman but she suddenly
needed her.
Natalie pulled Lenny
up and towards the stairs. As they made their way to the top floor,
Lenny spilled her heart out.
“
I
told him I loved him! I mean, how stupid is that? I just said, ‘hey,
I love you, goodbye.’…He hasn’t even called!…I
know, I know,
I’m
the one who left but I thought they would call. I thought
someone
would call. Even
Shane
called!
I
thought I was important. I guess I’m not. I’m just
a…loser!” Lenny collapsed on her bed, face down. She
twisted her face out of the pillow and continued, “and I know
it would have never worked. I mean, how could it? He has this whole
other incredible life.
Of
course
he didn’t want me hanging around forever. I was a…
fling
…an
experiment…
convenient.
”
Her breath caught on the last word, “Just like Ashton.”
Fresh tears pooled in her eyes.
Natalie moved to the
bathroom and started a hot shower. She came back and helped Lenny
into a standing position.
“
You’re
not a loser,” Natalie spoke firmly. “But you really need
to get cleaned up. Just because he hasn’t called doesn’t
mean you can forgo basic hygiene.”
Lenny nodded
begrudgingly and began the arduous task of getting showered. She
toweled off and Natalie coached Lenny into getting dressed in fresh
clothes. Then Natalie sat Lenny down on the bench at the end of her
bed and took careful time to comb out Lenny’s long tangled
hair.
“
Why
are you being so nice to me?” Lenny whispered.
“
You’re
important to Shawn.” Natalie said simply. “And Shawn is
important to me. Besides, I’ve been through my fair share of
break ups, it helps to have a friend.”
“
How
long have you guys known each other?” Lenny was touched at
this woman’s kindness and compassion.
“
Oh,
about two weeks.” Natalie laughed lightly. “I know that
seems fast but when you’ve been through as much as I have you
know what to look for in a person.”
“
I
used to think I knew what to look for.” Lenny said, more tears
threatening to spill over. What was wrong with her? She’d
never acted this emotional before in her whole life. She was
stronger than this. She had to be. She'd forgotten or something.
“
Just
because he let you walk away doesn’t mean he didn’t have
feelings for you.” Natalie came around to look Lenny in the
eyes. “Sometimes, guys get scared and they act badly.”
“
He
hasn’t even called.” Lenny whispered, folding her hands
helplessly in her lap.
“
I
know, and he might not.” Natalie said honestly. “It’s
important to grieve. You’re not doing anything wrong.”
“
But
I’m acting like a crazy person,” Lenny protested. “This
isn’t me! I’m always focused and in control and level
headed…Now I’m…just a mess.”
Natalie touched
Lenny’s chin gently and offered a small smile.
“
It’s
okay to be messy. Love does that to us.”
“
When
will I feel better?” Lenny asked.
“
It’ll
take some time.” Natalie admitted. “But from what Shawn
has told me about you, you’re strong and courageous. You’ll
get through this.”
“
I’ve
never been in love before.” Lenny mumbled, looking at the
floor. “It hurts so bad. Like a piece of me is missing. Not
something small like a finger…more like a lung.”
Natalie patted her
knee. “Yep. I know what that feels like.” She
swallowed hard. “But it will get better. I promise.”
Lenny looked into
Natalie’s dark eyes and wanted so badly to believe her. She
had to hope it would get better. She just wished she didn’t
have to miss Luke so badly while she was waiting for it to get
better. Was that too much to ask?
***
Duke brought Tyler
back inside to warm up and found the ladies in the living room
sitting by the fire. It brought a special peace over him that he
couldn’t explain.
“
There’s
hot chocolate on the stove,” Natalie directed him.
Duke filled a cup
for both he and Tyler and then they joined them in the other room.
Tyler lay down on the floor and took off his socks, propping up his
feet to face the fire. Duke sat in the chair adjacent to the couch.
“
I’m
glad you got cleaned up,” he lifted his chin to Lenny, taking
in her fresh face and clothes. She was wearing a fuzzy gray sweater
that he hadn’t seen her in since their trip to Alaska a few
years back. She had bought it in a little shop of handmade items.
It reminded him of a phone call he’d gotten a couple days
prior.
“
Yeah,
I guess I just didn’t know what to do with myself…I
still kinda don’t.” Lenny was blue.
Duke
frowned. He had really believed that Luke was the one. It had all
seemed so clear but he’d just let her walk away.
What
a fool,
Duke decided internally.
“
Hey,
Nick called the other day.” Duke changed the subject.
“
Nick?”
Lenny frowned quizzically, “Nick Federa?”
Duke nodded, “Yup.
He and Serge and a few of the guys are heading to Alaska this week.
He heard you were back in the game and wanted to know if you’d
be up for it.” His offer hung in the air. The perfect escape.
A two week trip to the back country of Alaska with some of the best
riders in the world. No television, no distractions. Nothing but
the purity and thrill of riding ancient mountains.
“
Are
you going?” Lenny questioned, a small spark stirring in her
blue eyes.
Duke sighed and
glanced at Natalie. “Nah, I’m gonna stick around here.
I’ve been helping Natalie get her cabin in order and I can’t
very well bail on her now.”
“
You’ve
done enough already,” Natalie’s eyebrows went up. “I
can get the rest finished. I wouldn’t mind if you wanted to go
on a trip with your friends.”
Duke’s
eyes crinkled at the sides as he smiled at her. “I know
you
wouldn’t mind. I think I’d miss you guys too much.”
He stared adoringly at Natalie, forgetting for a moment that Lenny
was sitting right there until she cleared her throat in an obvious
manner.