Learning to Live (19 page)

Tonight is the first night she’s been scheduled to work since we
returned from Pensacola, and I’m not looking forward to leaving her
with Benji all night. I try to convince her to let me hang out at the bar
and keep her company, but she tells me she’ll be fine and not to worry.
I give up in the end because this relationship is new and I don’t want
to seem overbearing or controlling.

“What night are you off?” I ask on the way to drop her off at Jay
Jay’s. I want to take her out on an official date, but I know she works
most nights of the week.

She puts the finishing touches on her lip gloss, and my stare is
automatically drawn to her lips. “I’m off Sunday and Tuesday of next
week. Why?”

Turning my attention back to the road before I turn around, I
answer, “Just wondering when I can have you all to myself again. Plus,
I want to take you out on an official date.” I watch her smile grow. “So
where do want to go for dinner on Sunday?

She thinks about it for a minute. “Well, I don’t really care what we
eat. Why don’t you pick, and I’ll eat whatever you choose. Well, I
think I will anyway.” She smiles sweetly at me, and I squeeze her hand
as I smile back.

After I park the car, I walk around to help her out. Then we make
our way into the building.
“You know you didn’t have to walk me in.” I follow her into the
employee lounge so she can store her bag. “I’ve been doing it for
weeks with no problems.
“I know. I’m just reluctant to let you go and have all those drunks
ogle what’s mine.”
As well as a guitar playing bartender
, I think to
myself as she locks up her bag.
We start heading toward the bar when she says, “I really need to
get to work before the dinner crowd starts in. And don’t worry about
getting me tonight. I’ll call Jazz or get someone to take me home
because it’s going to be late and you have practice in the morning.”
I see Benji walking our way and just decide to be an immature ass
and pull my man card out. I grab Tru and turn her toward me. Then I
wrap my arms around her waist and feel her warm skin from where her
tight black T-shirt has ridden up. I don’t give her time to think before
my lips are on hers, and I feel her shiver. I savor every twist of her
tongue on mine as our mouths make love the way I want to with her.
When she starts making soft moans, I know it’s time to stop before we
get carried away.
She’s panting when we pull apart, and I know my breathing is just
as rough. I rest my face in the crook of her neck to gain my composure
because looking into her heat-filled eyes doesn’t help the hard on in
my pants. “I’ll come get you if Jazz won’t, okay? I would rather
anyway, but I’m learning you can be stubborn so I’ll bend some.”
As I lift my face she’s smiling and nods her head. I give her one
more kiss before I turn around and see Benji watching. I just give him
a chin lift with a cocksure smile plastered on my face and strut out the
door. I know he understands now that I got the girl and to back off. Or
at least he better.

The night has flown by, and I can’t stop smiling. I already want to
see Jax again, but I’ll restrain myself and settle for texting him instead.
He’s sent me several sweet ones throughout the night that only added
to my good mood.
How did I get here?
I think to myself and finish
wiping down the bar after the last customer leaves. Nothing can cause
this good mood to falter right now. I’m not even going to let Benji’s
attitude get to me.
Blaire walks up to help me put the clean glasses away because
Benji is still on his break. “Hey, sorry about Benji. He had a phone call
to make.” I don’t know why she thinks she needs to explain his
actions, but I don’t think too much on it.
I look at my phone and realize Jazz should be here any minute. I
called her earlier than usual because I had a few minutes when it
slowed down. She was still up and said she would be here shortly.
Thank goodness because I’m drained
. I sit at a table, lay my head on
my arms, and rest my eyes. I hear the cushions squeak and turn my
head. Benji is sitting there with his elbows on the table, holding his
head, and seems to be thinking about something serious.
“Are you okay?” I ask. He’s become a friend and I don’t like this
odd mood he’s in. It’s not his usual playful one that I’ve become
accustomed to. He usually has me cracking up instead of feeling like I
did something wrong.
“What do you care?” he snaps.
“
Ooookaaaay
!” I’m caught off guard by his rude attitude. I don’t
know what his deal is, but he needs to stop taking it out on me. “I
thought we were friends and friends
do
show concern if that said
friend has a problem of some kind.”
Instead of answering me he just lifts his head and turns around to
face me. I settle in my seat and give him my full attention. Despite his
obvious anger, I push my shoulders back and sit up straight because
I’ll never show fear to any man in my life again. He finally takes a
breath, putting his cocky smile back on his face, and says with
sarcasm, “Okay,
friend.
How was your weekend? Did you have fun
with what’s his face?”
He’s being a smart ass, but I answer regardless. I’m going to act
normal around him. “Yes.” I can’t help the smile that forms when I
think back on my weekend with Jax and his family. “I almost know
how to swim now, and I even rode a jet ski, believe it or not.”
I watch him smile and I can tell it’s genuine and not like the one
before. “Really?” He pauses for a minute and looks intently at me. “I
can tell you had fun. What else did you do?” he asks while Blaire joins
our conversation. “Trudy here was just telling me about her weekend.”
He nods in my direction as he faces Blaire.
“Really? I want to hear. I’ve always wanted to go to Pensacola. I
hear the water is way nicer than here in the bay.” Blaire looks my way
with interest while she sits across from me.
I don’t know much about the Morgans, but I know they’re from
South Carolina and have been on their own for the past five years.
Besides the destinations they’ve traveled to, they don’t say much.
Blaire definitely isn’t a big talker, but Benji is and he’s always telling
me funny stories. At first I didn’t realize they were twins, but I can see
it at times. They have similar smiles but Blaire’s is feminine and
sweet.
I go on and tell them about my weekend and show them the
pictures I took on my phone. Of course most consist of Jax, but I do
throw in sweet Cohen and the other Colemans. I leave out the cougar
and my little performance though. That was a onetime thing, and I
would hate to hear Benji’s comments. Before I know it Jazz is outside,
so I head out after I get my bag. Blaire and Benji follow but Mrs. Janet
stays.
I get in Jazz’s car and notice that she seems to be flustered. “Sorry
I keep disrupting your sleep. I really need to look into getting my own
car one day,” I say apologetically.
I have some money put away, but I have other plans for it.
However, I can’t keep doing this to my friends. I don’t want them to
think I’m a free loader, and I can always work extra hours and try to
make up the money. With that in mind I make the decision to look into
buying a cheap car soon.
She waves her hand dismissively. “No problem. I was up
anyway.” She looks like she wants to say something but turns away
and bites her lip.
I’m worried I did something wrong. This whole friend thing is
new to me, and I’m not sure of the rules. “Is something wrong, Jazz?
I’ve barely seen you since we’ve been back. Are you okay with me and
your brother dating?” I know she said she was okay with it before, but
I also know something is going on with her.
She pulls on the road and starts heading back to campus. “Of
course I’m okay with Jax and you.” She takes a breath and says in a
small voice, “Well, I’ve been busy because I’m kinda seeing
someone.”
I get a bad feeling in my gut and ask, even though I’m sure of the
answer and cross my fingers I’m wrong. “Who?”
“Um...” She hesitates and the bad feeling gets worse. “He’s older
and doesn’t want anyone to know, so you have to
swear
to me you
won’t say anything to anyone. That’s including Jax.”
I hate agreeing but I need to know what is going on with her.
“Yeah, sure, but know this...” She looks at me and I continue. “If I feel
that you’re in any trouble, I won’t keep it from your brother, okay?”
She wants to argue, but I hold my hand up. “You’re the only friend that
I’ve ever had, and I’ll protect you no matter if I lose you in the
process. So if you seem to be in trouble, I won’t keep quiet.”
“Fine, but I can assure you I’m not in trouble.” She takes a breath
and blurts it out. “Professor Wallace.”
I knew it but I’m still surprised to hear it confirmed. I remain
speechless but it wouldn’t matter anyway if I said anything because
she continues full of excitement.
“Tonight was our first time having sex. Can you believe it? We
met at a hotel across the state line so nobody from school would see
us.” She gets a big smile across her face and a dreamy look in her blue
eyes. “It was my first time ever, and it was a lot different than what I
imagined, but Tru he’s just so sweet and gentle and I think I could love
him.” She looks at me still smiling, and I can tell she probably already
does.
“Jazz, are you sure about this guy? I mean, what if the school
finds out? You’ll jeopardize all your hard work and his job.” I want to
make sure she understands what she’s doing, but I don’t have a good
track record when it comes to men, so I can’t say much.
Finally after an awkward drive, we arrive to the dorm and exit the
car. We walk in silence to our rooms while I try to process this
information. When we get to our doors, I see a note tapped to mine
with my full name written on it. I don’t recognize the hand writing but
I know it’s a male by the small lettering and sharp lines.
“Who’s that from?” Jazz asks me from my left, and I just shrug
my shoulder, looking at the note.
It’s on lined notebook paper and folded in fours. I start to unfold it
when I answer. “I guess Jax.”
“No, I know my brother’s handwriting and that’s definitely not
his.”
Now I’m confused because Jax is the only guy who knows where
I’m staying besides David, and I know it’s not from him. I open the
note and after I read it, I feel chills rush up and down my spine and a
sick feeling develops in my stomach.
“What’s it say?” Jazz tries to snatch the note from my hands but I
evade her.
I just tear it up and say, “Nothing.” I unlock my door and after she
harasses me for a minute, she finally goes to her room for the night.
After a quick shower I text Jax to tell him goodnight and that I’ll see
him tomorrow.
His response puts me at ease for the moment.
Nite Beautiful.
Miss U
Nite. Miss u 2
I lie in bed thinking of Jax, but eventually my thoughts return to
the suspicious note. I don’t want to worry about who it could be from,
but I do. The words just creep me out, and I hope I’m not correct about
who sent it, but I have a bad feeling that’s eating away at my
confidence and contentment. I finally put my earplugs in and listen to
some Mumford and Sons and push the words on the note from my
brain.
Can’t wait to have another taste.