Live In Position (71 page)

Read Live In Position Online

Authors: Sadie Grubor

Before I knew it we were back in Seattle, arriving to the house. Victoria ran out of the front door and almost tackled me in the driveway. I hugged her so tightly, never wanting to let her go.

"I missed you so much." I squeezed her more.

"I missed you too!" she squeezed back.

"Easy on mommy," Collin warned. He was a little over protective with the pregnancy.

"Come on, I want to hear all about…"

My sentenced died off as I took in the foyer. There were brown boxes, neatly wrapped boxes, vases of flowers, gift baskets, and etcetera. I scanned the room for an end to the madness, but I couldn't seem to find one.

"These all starting arriving about three days ago." Larissa spoke with a large smile. "I bet there are some wonderful things in them, but you should get settled back in before you worry about it. Give yourself a couple of days." She kissed my cheek and began putting on her coat.

"I need to get back to my boys." She knelt down to Victoria. "Thank you for having girl fun with me this week." She hugged her and stood back up. "I will stop by in a couple of days. We can work through all of these gifts, making thank you card lists. It can be an afternoon date." With a wave, Larissa was out the door.

Again, the sense of being overwhelmed encompassed me. Collin obviously recognized the change in me.

"Come, you can worry about all of this after the weekend." He took my hand and led us to the kitchen. His goal had become to keep me eating as much as possible.

The weekend passed by with a long movie night and some baking with Victoria. She told me all about the week I missed, as well as her time with Pawpaw and Carla. Listening to her talk had been almost meditative. However, Monday was upon us and I was not looking forward to an afternoon of gift opening and thank you card list making. With a large inhale and exhale I climbed out of my car and went into the house. Larissa wouldn't be arriving for a few more hours, so I decided to get some juice and a bagel before checking my emails. A ring of the doorbell surprised me.

Pulling open the front door with a bagel slathered in cream cheese in my greedy grasp, Ilene's perky smile appeared. I forced a smile and pulled the door open all the way.

"Ilene?"

"Oh, it is so nice to see you," she pushed into the house and removed her coat. Wow, she actually hung it up herself. I'm a little impressed. "Was it lovely in Hawaii? I bet it was."

"Yes, it was really nice. Um, what are you..?" She began walking around all of the unopened gifts and another body appeared behind me. I was a little startled.

"I came to help you with all of this," she flit her hand around as she spoke, without looking at me. "James, I need you to move these here into the living room, over there."

"Uh, actually, Larissa will be coming over in a couple of hours to help me with all this." I motioned to the gifts before taking a large bite of bagel and watching James carry a couple of boxes into the other room.

"Yes, I spoke to her this morning." She finally looked back at me. "I was interesting in going shopping, but this will be so much more fun. Plus, I brought the muscle to help carry the stuff."

Yeah, big fun, I shook off that thought and smiled.

It ended up only being an hour later when Larissa showed up. She smiled apologetically over Ilene's shoulder when they embraced hello. I smiled back, knowing there was no stopping Ilene at this point.

Taking up shop in the living room, I sat on the couch with Larissa and Ilene on either side of me. I opened, Ilene critiqued, and Larissa wrote down names and gift given. There were silver serving trays, crystal bowls and vases, sculptures, and plenty of other things. I seriously didn't know what to do with most of the items we received.

"What am I supposed to do with two silver tea sets?" I giggled.

"Victoria can have one to play with," Larissa laughed out.

"These are not toys," Ilene gasped. I laughed harder.

Three hours. It took three hours to get through all the boxes. I was so happy to be done with it, but Ilene soon killed my joy

"You haven't gone through any of these yet?" She asked with a shake of her head.

She dropped a pile of envelopes in front of me. I began fingering the different colored and textured envelopes one by one. At first they were cards of congratulations from some of Collin's colleagues. However, they quickly changed into invites. Charity lunches, galas, PTA groups, social clubs, and multiple brunches were piling up before me.

"Oh these are
longtime friends of our family. Put them in the confirm pile." Ilene handed Larissa the cream colored cardstock. "You will have to let Collin know about some of the dinners and such to make sure he's available before you confirm." She patted my leg.

"Uh, yeah, okay." Not knowing what else to say, I sat there while Ilene and Larissa sorted through the invitations. When they would disagree they would both turn to me for my opinion,
but all I could do was shrug. The magnitude of all these pending commitments was almost too much to process.

By the end of our first week home most was back to normal. The only change was my publisher called frequently, setting up my pending book tour. There were a couple of ideas for different places to take the tour. Obviously I would revisit New York and Strand, but there were new ideas about inviting some daycares and young school children to public libraries for promotion. Since the public library had been a favorite place of mine as a kid, I was quick to agree to the idea. Not only would it promote my book, but it would support local libraries. At least I hoped it would.

Collin wasn't thrilled about the travel. He claimed it was more about me traveling while pregnant worrying him. His determination to travel along with me as much as he could was the only thing keeping a disagreement from arising.

I was sitting at the breakfast bar in the kitchen looking over the black leather date book Larissa helped me pick out. With all of these commitments and tour dates I had to start writing everything down as well as program my phone. There had already been one brunch where I messed up the date and didn't show up. I totally used the pregnancy as my excuse, but felt guilty about it later.

"What's that?" Collin kissed the side of my head nodding toward the open book.

"My date book," I sighed and closed it up. He raised one curious brow at me. I shrugged. "With all of this stuff going on," I yawned out, "excuse me. I have to keep track of it somehow."

"What stuff?" He slid the book toward him and sat next to me.

"Doctor appointments, Victoria's schedule, social obligations," sarcasm laced that last one, "and, you know, the book tour, finding time to write, regular daily duties –"

"Sophia, you need some help."

"What?" I wrinkled up my face and pulled the book away from him. "I'm fine."

"You are going to exhaust yourself." He countered. "You already drag yourself to bed at night like a zombie. And what happens once the baby is here? Do you think it will get better?"

"I can handle it." I stood and walked toward the fridge.

"You need someone to help you with things, like Victoria's day and –"

"I do not need someone to help me with Victoria." The loud plop of the thawed chicken breast seemed to punctuate my words for me.

"Listen to me. Do you think I set my own schedule at work?" I gave a reluctant shrug. "No, I don't," he stood and walked over to me. "I have an assistant who handles my calendar and assists with things. It's just to help."

His words made sense, but it made me feel like I was putting Victoria second.

"Honestly, I can handle –"

"Do you want to get sick? Do you want to not have any time to do the things you love, like writing, cooking with Victoria, taking our children to the playground?" His hand splayed across my stomach.

"No I don't want that," I grumbled and opened the chicken.

"Just think about it, okay? You don't have to do it right away, though I would like for you to be less stressed sooner than later." He kissed the side of my head.

"Okay." I huffed.

Did I really need to hire someone? Was Ilene correct when she told me I would need a cook, a nanny, and other house staff? I completely get what Collin is saying and I agree that someone to help me with Victoria and during the day, like an assistant would be very helpful. However, a part of me was concerned the person would replace me in Victoria's life, and would Collin find himself interested in a new nanny?

Getting irritated with my own train of thoughts I shook them off and started working on dinner. The poor chicken took a beating during my prep work.

The day after my conversation with Collin I found myself running around trying to make up the time I lost sleeping in late. Apparently I hit the off button instead of snooze this morning. I couldn't help it, my body wanted to sleep.

Then Victoria didn't want to get up and moving. I practically had to dress her and feed her like a baby. When it was time to get shoes and coats she was dawdling, which had put my already raw nerves further on edge.

"Damn it Victoria, come on, and get your ass moving." I snapped.

My eyes grew as wide as hers did. I had never once talked to her that way. I knew the pregnancy had me on edge, but I couldn't blame the hormones completely. Truth was I was exhausted. I knelt to the floor and hugged her tightly.

"I'm so sorry baby." A single tear trailed over my cheek.

"It's okay mommy." She hugged me tighter.

"No, it's not," I pulled back and looked into her face. "I should never talk to you that way. I swear it won't happen again. Okay?" She nodded and smiled. I hugged her one more time before we left.

As soon as I was back in the house I rushed upstairs and got dressed for one of those damn brunches I committed myself to attend. This one was being thrown at a restaurant by the wife of one of Collin's research colleagues. Slipping into a plum wrap dress and a pair of black ballet flats, I pulled my hair back in a twist and pinned it up.

Walking into the restaurant I was assaulted by a multitude of unfamiliar women with mimosas in their hands. Congratulations were spoken in regards to the wedding and the baby. Once I sat down, a mas
sive amount of questions about
how I landed Collin
, or
did you seduce him
, and my personal favorite
did he hire you for extracurricular activities
were thrown at me. I tried to be as civil as possible while answering, all the while praying the restaurant fire alarm would go off and I could escape.

Halfway through the brunch I realized this was nothing but a gossip get-together. So and so's husband was sleeping with his secretary, another's daughter was pregnant to a professor, and so on. They droned on and I considered excusing myself, but the conversation changed. Soon I was being thrown invitations to parties, shopping trips, and so on. I nodded politely, hoping it didn't come across a
s an acceptance but more of an,
I'll think about it
.

"Will you back off." The familiar screech shut the women up.

"Well, if it isn't Allison Bedford, oh wait, you've gone back to Bishop now right?" A dark haired, over tanned and made-up woman sneered at Allison.

"Yes, I have. Why would I keep such a filthy last name?"

"Why didn't you go with your mother's last name?" The same woman spoke with a glint of evil in her eye. She turned to me. "She was a nanny too right?" Her eyes batted innocently.

Oh this bitch wants me to kick her ass. I will make her choke on that fake French manicure.

"Yes, just like the one your first husband left you for and the one that your current husband is screwing." Allison tossed back at her while grabbing my arm and gesturing me up from my seat.

As she pulled me toward the exit a hand fell on my arm. I turned. There stood the hostess of the brunch with sincere embarrassment on her face.

"Sophia, I'm so sorry. Vinita has had one too many mimosas and –"

"And one too many lifts to her face," Allison snorted from behind me. The hostess fought laughing.

"It's okay, I understand. Thank you for brunch it was, well, it was entertaining."

With a warm smile and goodbye, I left the group of women. Once outside Allison turned to me.

"You don't have to do that you know?"

"Do what?"

"Go to all of these things," she waved toward the restaurant. "I'm sure my mother has you believing you do, but honestly very few of them matter. Some are worthwhile, like the charity ones, but these little brunches are just ridiculous." She shook her head and began to walk away. "Oh," she turned half back to me, "and don't let her convince you that you have to host something either, unless you really want to, okay?" I nodded and she walked to her car.

Climbing into mine I sighed out in frustration. Collin may be really right. I need help.

That evening I was declining Ilene's idea of hosting a dinner party at our house when Collin got home from work. As soon as I hung up I groaned out loud.

"That bad?" he asked.

"You have no idea." I stood from the kitchen stool and kissed him properly. This ended with me being lifted onto the counter top and him pressing between my legs.

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