Read Lockdown (AM13 Outbreak Series) Online
Authors: Samie Sands
The first person I see is Michelle, and she immediately races up to me and grabs me into a hug, almost knocking me backwards. I have to catch my breath afterwards; she’s practically winded me. She begins chattering away really excitedly at me to the point where I can’t seem to follow a single word she’s saying. Soon she drags me to her desk, still babbling merrily away.
Then she absolutely blows me away by showing me everything she’s done. No wonder she hasn’t called me, it doesn’t look like she’s had any free time. Looking at everything piled high on her desk, it seems as if she’s been working herself silly to prove ‘my’ theory right. I try to ignore the fact that even my best friend is referring to this nonsense as my idea, but it grates on me all the same.
I can’t deny it does feel nice that she cares so much about me that she’d work so hard to show the world I’m not a ditzy fool. She’s the one doing practically all the research to find out everything I’ve seen on the news. She tells me that she’s been working really closely with Jamie to locate the experts, the breaking news sources, the information; she’s compiled everything to make the story seem as credible as possible.
I’m emotionally torn—I
want
to be believed so I don’t look completely foolish, but I know the deeper it gets, the worse the comeuppance will be when the truth does come out. With everything I can see in front of me, it’s easy to see just why it’s being taken so seriously. What I can’t understand is why Michelle sounds as convinced as Jamie by everything AM13. I thought she saw it the same way I do.
Finally I can take it no more. I absolutely have to speak out. “So, this is
real
then? The virus, the quarantine?” I try to smile, to show I know it isn’t, but somehow the motion doesn’t quite reach my lips.
“Yes. I told you we’re all on board.” She looks confused. “That day when Jamie spoke to us, he showed us all of the evidence—it’s undeniable. I mean those videos! Those brave people who have risked their lives to film the horrors for others to see.” There isn’t a hint of sarcasm in her tone as she speaks, which I find extremely surprising. Has she been watching the same things I’ve seen? She can’t have—those videos were ridiculous.
I can’t believe how badly I misinterpreted her on the phone. If she really does believe in this, does that mean the rest of them do too? I glance around to spot everyone totally engrossed in their work, which is a sight I don’t think I’ve ever seen before. There’s no gossiping, no chatting, no messing around. Everyone is completely focused and serious. Not one person is looking at me…
Until my eyes suddenly lock with Jake’s. My heart leaps up into my throat as he smiles at me. All the butterflies I’ve felt around him before come flooding back. I try to smooth down my hair, all of a suddenly acutely aware of how bad I must look. I didn’t even glance in the mirror before I left. But he doesn’t look bothered by that, he actually looks pleased to see me. Relief floods through my body. It doesn’t look like I’ve ruined everything after all by all of this craziness. Maybe when it all blows over, we can go out on a real date. Oh my God, how amazing would that be?
As I look at him more, drinking him in, I notice he doesn’t
quite
look right. He’s very pale, nauseous looking. He has massive bags under his eyes, and sort of looks like he’s shaking all over. Flu symptoms. I wonder if he’s been to the doctors.
I walk towards him, worry plastered across my expression. “Are you okay, Jake?”
He sighs deeply before answering. “I’ve not felt great since all this kicked off. I actually think I’m just nervous about it all. Wow, that’s not very manly, is it? It’s just a bit mad.” He lets out a bit of a weird noise—I think it’s supposed to be a laugh.
I think that’s the moment I truly realise what an impact this scare is having on people. To be
this
frightened seems totally bizarre to me. I can’t understand why everyone has the opposite view to me, why is no one being rational? The only explanation I can think of is everyone has got the equivalent of the online crazies I gave myself the other night. Clearly being in this office where it’s the only thing discussed is doing no one any favours.
After a few moments of silence, I give Jake a hug and wander over to my desk.
Before I even sit down and switch on the computer, I notice there’s a note from Jamie sitting on my keyboard. It could have been sitting there for days for all I know. All it tells me to do is see him as soon as possible. After a few seconds’ internal debate, I decide to face the music early, get my bollocking over and done with. I can’t even begin to imagine how mad he is over me missing such important days of work. I just hope I don’t get sacked—I’m sure I’ve committed a sack-able offence.
Then, I’m going to anger him further by telling him I want
more
time off. Oh God, that’s not going to go down well. But surely this counts as extenuating circumstances? I have been through a lot. Plus he did say that the company would help me in any way possible.
So why do I feel so afraid?
I knock tentatively on his door, feeling myself cringe as he yells at me to go right in. As soon as he realises it’s me, Jamie’s face breaks out into a beaming smile.
“Sit down.” He indicates the chair by his desk. I tiptoe over there, wanting this meeting to be over quickly. “Glad to see you back, Leah.” There isn’t a trace of annoyance; he sounds genuinely pleased I’m back at work. “So thank you again, this has been great for us. I don’t know if any of the others have caught you up, but we’ve been extremely busy! Our ratings have gone through the roof, we’ve been allocated more hours, and we’ve even been given a small segment on the national news.” I guess my days off haven’t exactly been too devastating to the company then. “We now have all the credibility and respect possible—we found this story, we were the first to put it out there.” I have no idea what I’m supposed to say, which is becoming quite normal for me, so I just nod. “Everyone has been working round the clock to ensure we’re always first with the information…”
I know if I don’t interrupt now, I never will “So, this quarantine. Is it
definitely
going to happen? Has it been decided?”
***
A little while later, I walk out of Jamie’s office in a daze. Apparently ‘my’ brilliant idea—however much I insisted I found it online—has led to some fantastic plans being made. The quarantine is definitely going to happen, they’re just working on finer details, logistics, and practicalities. After I asked a couple of questions and sort of got my head around the idea, I mentioned that I’d like to go home to visit my parents for a few days. The simple shake of Jamie’s head was all I needed to know. He’s insistent that I’m needed here, regardless of the fact that they’ve clearly coped fine without me until now.
He then went on to say that I’ll even be needed during the quarantine. Because our news station is now
so
important, we’ll be required to stay on the air during. We’re going to be the ones to keep everyone up-to-date on the latest progressions. I suppose this is a good thing—it’ll be necessary to keep the quarantine under control—I just can’t believe it has to be us.
He’s in the process of setting up plans and a budget for beds to be put up in the canteen for us all. With the promise of a good payout at the end, apparently everyone is keen to do it. Particularly as the estimation of fourteen days isn’t
too
long, I suppose.
How typical is this, a national disaster and I’m one of the unlucky ones that still has to work!
As I speak to others throughout the afternoon, I can see it isn’t just the money that’s spurring people on to want to stay here during the quarantine. Most of us live alone, in our first homes since leaving our parents, so we’d rather be with others. Plus, this building is extremely secure—much more so than my flat, at any rate. There’s already a large wall surrounding it, and gates that you need a special pass to unlock, so if, by some miracle, we really
do
end up in a zombie infested world, this is probably a really good place to be!
The only person who didn’t seem quite as happy as the others was Michelle, so I call her as soon as I get home, wanting to know more about where her mindset is.
She answers after only one ring.
“Well?” I immediately chime in, not giving her a moment to answer. “What do you think about all of this? It’s crazy, right?”
I’m still thinking hypothetically at the moment. There’s no way this is
really
going to happen, surely? It’s not even practical. I mean, they can’t actually force everyone to stay indoors, can they? There must be some kind of human rights act or something that prevents it. Or worse, will everyone be forced to stay in work like us? Oh God, this really is a nightmare. I feel even worse about the whole thing than I did this morning, when I was basically ignorant.
“I don’t know…” she murmurs, clearly deep in thought.
Annoyed by her lack of enthusiasm, I start to rant almost incoherently. “I mean, why? Does he not see this is all going to blow up in our faces? And the others…they’re just…I don’t
get
them. It’s all an overreaction to—”
“I just thought we’d have more choice,” Michelle finally jumps in, stopping me in my tracks. I’ve been pacing up and down the room, but as soon as she says these words, my body slumps down into the nearest chair.
“What do you mean?”
“I know I played a part in achieving the quarantine—and I totally agree with it. I think it’s essential to our survival, but I didn’t know we’d all be stuck at work. Jamie’s being totally inflexible about it. It’s just…” She sighs deeply. “I thought we’d have more choice.”
I don’t know what to say to that, so we sit there in silence for a few moments. “What about the others?” I finally say. “Don’t they feel like you?”
“Yeah, to an extent, but they’re all so focused on the financial side of it that the rest of it pales into insignificance. At first they all complained, now all I hear is what they’re going to spend the extra money on—fancy holidays, new cars, and bigger homes.”
So it seems they’re thinking a couple of weeks fanning the flames of fear, then boom. Better career and more money.
But what about when it’s all proven to be a hoax? What will happen to us then? How will people feel about me when they know they wasted two weeks and ruined their careers in the process?
My blood runs icy cold and a lump forms in my throat as these thoughts race through my mind. My fingers almost begin to tremble. I’m starting to realise this has really spun out of my control. I knew this snowball was huge and damaging—but just
how
damaging is just occurring to me now.
I think back to my enthusiasm to go and see my family this morning. It’s still there, burning embers underneath the surface, but I can’t do it. For one, if I do then I’m a coward. I’m running away, hiding, whilst everyone else remains at work, dealing with the mess that I inadvertently created. And for two, if I
do
go then I’m basically accepting the government—who I’m assuming are all intelligent men and women—are going to go through with the plans. Which, in turn, means I’m kind of accepting the virus is real and I’m really not ready to do that yet.
I’ve already gone nearly six months without seeing them, what’s a few more weeks? I can still talk to them on the phone whenever I like, and I can go and visit when all this has blown over—assuming we’ll have the freedom to make our own choices by then, of course. Hopefully I won’t be going back with my tail between my legs.
A tiny part of me is hoping there
is
a virus. Not like what I’ve seen, of course. Just something so my life isn’t totally shredded apart.
“Anyway, I’m going to go…” Michelle interrupts my thought pattern suddenly, jolting me back to the present. I suddenly realise she’s been talking a lot and I haven’t even been paying attention.
“Okay, see you tomorrow.”
“Yeah, bye.” The sadness in her tone sends guilt right through me. I wonder if she’s been telling me something important and I’ve been in my own world.
I remain seated for a few moments, just stewing in emotion. I have no idea where my head is and what I really think anymore. I’ve always been one of life’s ditherers, but I’ve never been so confused ever. This is on another level entirely!
My mind flicks from decision to decision, never quite settling on anything, so after a while I give up trying to think and make my way to bed. Maybe a good night’s sleep will be the answer I’m looking for.
***
I wake up a long time before my alarm goes off. Well, to be honest, I barely slept, so it was more that I gave up and got up. I stagger over to my mirror and sit down in front of it, just looking at myself. My dull hair is straggly and limp, my dark eyes tired and bloodshot and my skin is covered in blotches and spots. Rather than picking on every fault and internally criticising myself, I just stare—fascinated. It’s as if I’m looking at someone else, an alien species or something.
My mind is blank, my brain almost empty, but that doesn’t mean I feel any calmer than I did yesterday. It’s almost as if I’m too exhausted to feel anything anymore. Numb is all I can be.
Time whizzes past and soon I dress myself and amble over to work. This all happens while I’m in another world entirely. I’m acting solely on autopilot, and even if I wanted to change that, I don’t think I could.
Even as I get into work and sit down at my desk, I remain in that same comatose state. All kinds of things happen around me, but it’s all in my peripheral vision. I can’t concentrate at all—not even on the delivery men that traipse in and out, bringing crappy camp-style beds with them. Under normal circumstances, I’d be laughing about this with Michelle, making jokes about it being a bit like a bad sitcom. I’d be slagging off the boss’s new mad idea with the others over by the water cooler. I’d be wondering how all of this was real—but I’m not. I’m just sitting.
Just sitting, waiting for something to happen.
And then, in the afternoon, it does.
Jamie bursts into the office, clutching a piece of paper tightly to his chest. “The date is here!” he cries. Everyone looks up from whatever they’re doing in shock. A gasped murmur breaks out, as my heart jumps into my throat. “It
is
a bit sooner than we expected, of course.” He smiles brightly. “The Lockdown is going to be in ten days…”
“Why?”
“Is there a reason?”
“Are we ready?”
A selection of necessary questions spill out, but Jamie doesn’t really address any of them. “All the information is coming. I don’t know anything else yet. There is obviously a reason for things happening so quickly, but I can’t tell you any more at the moment.” He waits a moment for everyone to settle down. While he’s silent, the sound of my racing heart seems to get louder. I start to believe it might burst from my chest at any moment. “On a positive note, we’re going to be the ones to make this announcement on our national news segment tonight. This is really great for us, so I just want to say thanks to you all. Thanks, Leah.”
I blush as soon as my name is mentioned, not in pride or anything, but in pure unadulterated embarrassment. Everyone turns to face me, which makes it much worse. My breaths become laboured; nausea swirls around in my stomach. I become convinced I’m about to be sick at any moment.
I try to calm myself down, only half-listening to the questions swirling around me. When it comes down to practical arrangements, it seems everyone is most concerned with how we’re going to eat. I don’t know what this says about everyone’s priorities, although they are right—if we’re locked indoors, there’s no way we’ll be able to pop out to the supermarket at random.
According to what Jamie knows about the latest plans, everyone will register where they’re staying during the quarantine—kind of like a census—then the armed forces will deliver supplies a couple of times a week. Anything else we want needs to be purchased beforehand. The budget set aside for this is for two weeks, so there are definitely no plans for it to last any longer than that.
The talk then goes on to discuss the infection right now. One of our main priorities is to urge people showing any signs to get themselves to the hospitals right now—before the Lockdown starts. This is for their safety, their families, and everyone else. Special hotlines have been set up so people can report anyone they suspect, anyone looking unwell or acting out of character. Our news anchors will be working hard over the next few days to convince people that it’s in their best interests to get every ill person to hospital or we’ll never be able to get all of this under control.
As Jamie talks incessantly, I subconsciously find myself looking at Jake. He was the one I was trying to impress with the video in the first place, and now I’m pretty sure he can’t even bring himself to look at me. Great. That’s just marvellous. This is officially the stupidest thing I’ve done to impress a boy. And that includes the time I told Kriss Birnam Tony Hawks was coming to perform skateboarding tricks at my 13th birthday party.
Come to think of it, that was the last time he spoke to me as well.
I’m so done with boys.