Authors: Debra Clopton
Max frowned. No...no what?
One glance at Emma's crestfallen expression determined she wasn't sure, either. No to Camp Hope? No to authority? No to rules? Or was it a more positive portrayal, as in, no more fighting? No more crimes? No more misbehaving?
He couldn't be sure. But he didn't need a course in symbolism to conclude that the dripping red and black paint spoke of intense feelings, likely anger. Maybe even hatred. Cody was dealing with something hard-core, and until their next One4One chat, he wouldn't get a chance to find out. He couldn't exactly march over and demand an explanation. The last thing they needed was to judge the kids based on their project. This was supposed to be a safe exercise, a chance for them to express themselves, though he did caution them ahead of time about keeping the paintings PGâno nudity or curse words, or they'd lose recreation time for a week.
“What about Tonya's?” He couldn't see the girl's entire canvas from here, but it had to be more encouraging than Cody'sâand right now, the best gift he could give Emma was distraction as well as prompting her to use her training productively. He hated the helpless gleam in her eye and sent up a quick prayer that God would redeem their situation ASAP. Something would give, soon.
It had to.
Emma straightened her shoulders, and he wanted to applaud the way she gathered herself together, despite the trauma still lingering in her eyes as she focused on Tonya's project. “I'm not sure. I can't tell.”
They both eased sideways several paces until they could see around her bent head, still hunched over her painting as she did detail work at the bottom. The top of Tonya's easel was covered in pastel stripes, representing a sunset or sunrise.
“I still can't see the rest. It looks like a self-portrait, maybe? Those look like her black braids.” Emma craned her neck as she spoke.
Max did the same. The painting held promise, what he could see of itâmuch less amateur in style than the others. Tonya was either a natural or had taken classes at some point. The eyes on the figure she was painting appeared nearly alive, while the cheery background hinted at a lighthearted mood that well complemented the young girl in the drawing.
Then Tonya leaned back, paintbrush lowering, and studied the portrait, allowing Max and Emma a full viewâof a beautiful, African-American girl with braids, vivid eyes...
And a distorted, wide-open jaw that yawned and swirled off her face.
He shot a startled glance at Emma, whose eyes widened in recognition. When she finally spoke, it was to confirm what Max already knew.
“Tonya has a secret.”
Chapter Fifteen
E
mma never thought she'd ever seek solace in a dusty barn stall, but the repetitious motion of running a currycomb through Remington's mane somehow brought as much relaxation as her last spa trip.
Maybe more.
Remington shifted his weight, bobbing his head slightly and leaning into her smooth stroking. Maybe the extra attention was just what the horse needed, too.
Emma slowed as she worked through a tangle. Tonya's painting from yesterday weighed heavily on her spirit, almost as much as Cody's did. She whispered to Remington. “Did Tonya tell you her secrets before she fainted?”
Remington's ears flicked forward at her voice, and then he snorted through his nose.
She kept brushing, trying not to dwell on the fact she had just resorted to talking to animals. “I understand. Confidences are confidences.”
Sort of like how it seemed evident Stacy knew something about Tonya that she wasn't telling. Did the older girl know Tonya had been faking her illness the other day and was holding it over her? It seemed a valid possibility, but Emma couldn't reconcile with the idea that Tonya would care so strongly about pretending to be sick. It'd be easier to just admit the truth now and take the consequence than cater to Stacy's whims.
Or would it? Emma sure wasn't taking that advice herself.
She pushed the uncomfortable thought aside, finishing the tangle before moving to the next portion of mane, the dark strands wiry between her fingers. The girls were finishing up breakfast, and she'd excused herself to start chores early and have a minute to de-stressâbefore the constant chatter, brooding and occasional whining from her charges began. Even after the optional Bible study that morning before breakfast, they seemed grumpy, as though they sensed something in the air. Maybe because only half the kids had attended the study.
She felt disgruntled herself. Sitting across from Max and listening to him read the Bible for fifteen minutes left her breakfast lodged in her stomach like a rock, heaping guilt in generous dollops on top.
And her mother...Emma paused, her fingers knotted in Remington's mane. Her garden-side revelation had brought more regret than relief, though it was sort of freeing to know a living soul finally knew her dirty little secret.
Slowly, she unclenched the strands of horse hair and resumed her brushing, stomach knotting instead. Her mom had taken the news a little better than Emma had suspected. But her words lingered.
Broken Bend's bad boy transitioned into a solid, God-fearing man, Emma. If you'd told me the truth from the beginning, I could have let you know that.
After Emma's immediate defense, which went over her mom's head as usual, more words left a permanent mark.
It could have been different, Emma. So much different. For all of you.
The weight of those words latched on to her shoulders and clung for dear life. She might as well name the baggage she'd just acquired, because it wasn't going anywhere.
Her mother was right in one regard. But in another, she still didn't understand. No one did. And unless they had been pregnant, rejected and alone, watching the man who promised that his love for her transcended any addiction live out his lie in neon color, wellâthey never would.
Besides, who was to say that it wasn't intentional? If she'd stuck around that day she caught Max in the middle of a deal, would he still have eventually changed and devoted his life to helping others? Or would she somehow have derailed God's plan even further?
Regardless, whatever Max had become didn't change what he'd been.
She dropped the brush in the grooming bucket she'd snagged from the tack room and rubbed Remington's neck. “Don't count on this behavior from me regularly.” Weird that she wasn't already craving a hot stone massage treatment by now, one of her more frequent rewards for her stressful career in Dallas. Maybe there was something to be said for open skies and fresh air, after all.
Now, if only it'd work on Cody.
Remington snuffled the hand she held in front of his nose, and she grimaced at the soft, wet horse skin. “It'll take more than that to convince me, you know.”
“Convince you of what?” Max appeared in front of the stall door, and Emma jumped. A petite blonde stood beside him, wearing a T-shirt with the fire department logo blazoned across the front.
Emma stepped away from Remington, his head bobbing at her abrupt movements. “Nothing.” She tried to smile and pretend like she wasn't caught talking to a horse, though with Max's lifestyle now he probably wouldn't have thought twice. But who was his friend, and what would she think? “Just waiting on the girls to get here.”
“You might want to go check on them.” Max frowned, glancing at his watch. “Breakfast was cleared away fifteen minutes ago, and they're supposed to come straight out here for chores.”
“Maybe they needed a bathroom break.” Emma started to open the stall door, and Max stepped back to give her room.
“This is Caley, by the way. Brady's wife.”
Caley held out her hand, her grip warm and solid. “Nice to meet you. I'veâ” She swallowed the rest of her sentence and finished with a smile, instead. But the unspoken words lingered.
I've heard a lot about you
.
Emma still wasn't sure how they made her feel, but the dividing line teetered more toward good than bad, and she wasn't sure how she felt about that, either.
Time to go. “Thanks. I better go check on the girls.” Max was probably being paranoid, considering how long girls took prepping in the bathroom and knowing how they did anything possible to legitimately stall their chores, but at least this way she wouldn't have to make awkward small talk with Caley. If Brady knew about her, then it went without saying Caley did, too.
Max's voice followed her down the barn aisle. “Caley's here to meet the girls, so why doesn't she go with you?”
She paused and turned slowly. “Sure.” Talk about awkward. Hopefully Caley wouldn't want to talk about her and Max. Or anything to do with Max, for that matter. Not while her heart still tottered on her sleeve, her secret one breath away from being revealed.
Caley fell into step beside Emma as they made their way to the dorm. “Max wanted me to come speak to the girls at some point before camp was over, sort of show them what it looked like to follow a career dream.” She lifted one slim shoulder in a shrug. “I'm a firefighter, and he thinks they could use encouragement, since most of his campers don't have good home lives. Sort of like I'm proof they can succeed even when they feel the odds are stacked against them.”
Her defense against Caley dissolved slightly. “That's not a bad idea.” Wow, Max thought of everything. He seemed truly invested in each of his campers lives, especially to go to such effort to cover every element of their future.
Caley's eyes shone. “I'm happy to help. I've been through some stuff in the past, and while it's probably nothing like these girls, we're all in need of grace.”
Wasn't that the truth. Her steps faltered. She knew God gave grace to sinners...but what about when those sinners knew better, like she did when she messed up by getting involved emotionally and then physically with Max? Did that cancel it out? Or did she just have to pay more consequences, like now, with Cody's rebellion and her own struggle regarding her feelings for his dad?
Thankfully they reached the dorms before she could determine an answerâif there even was one.
Emma stepped inside the temporary building. “Girls? There's someone here to meet you. And by the way, you're late for chores.”
Katie and Stacy looked up with guilt-ridden expressions as they hunched on the side of Tonya's bed, whispering furtively. Tonya was nowhere to be seen.
Emma stopped and crossed her arms. “Okay, that's it. What do you know?”
Katie looked away, and Stacy smirked as if confident she knew Emma couldn't force her to tell. “Well, let's see. Two plus two equals four, and the capital of Louisiana isâ”
Caley snorted beside her, and covered it with a cough.
It would have been funny to Emma, too, though still disrespectfulâbut Caley didn't know the whole story about Tonya, and there was nothing funny right now about the fact the girl wasn't in her room, and her roommates were sharing secrets. Secrets Emma needed to know.
“To the barn. Now. Caley will walk you.” Let the firefighter introduce herself on the way. She caught the blonde's eye, and Caley immediately nodded and ushered the girls out the door. “Max has told me a lot about you” were her trailing words as the door closed behind them.
Well at least she got to say it to someone.
Emma paced the small walkway between the beds, wishing the quilts could talk. She needed to alert Max in case Tonya had run away, but first, she wanted to figure out what was going on. Why had the other girls landed on Tonya's bed to share secrets if she wasn't here? Probably implied Tonya had been there recently. Maybe she and Caley had missed her on their way from the barn. Maybe Tonya hadn't run away, just gotten upset and walked out first instead of coming over for chores together. Had the girls upset her?
She didn't want to overreact, but she really didn't want to under-react, either.
She stopped in front of the bathroom door, noticing the light on and the toilet running. Might be leaky, unless someone had just used it before she came in. She looked inside, unsure what she was searching for.
Her gaze caught on the trash can tucked between the toilet and the counter, and she sucked in her breath.
Remington and the bed quilts might not be giving Tonya's secrets upâbut the wastebasket sure did.
* * *
Max stood back, surveying the rows of folding chairs spread across the sun-dried grass, splotches of red and blue paint evident on several patches where the tarps had failed. Trust exercises. He still wasn't sure about this, but Emma seemed to know what she was talking about, and he wanted to incorporate her ideas. Wanted her to feel as though she was a part of this.
He knew how terrible it felt to be involved in something up to your eyebrows and still have zero control. For him, it'd been a drug addiction. For Emma, it was watching her son spiral beneath her grasp.
With God's help, he'd beaten his. Hopefully he'd get to see Emma and Cody share a similar victory.
The kids' voices rose on the brisk November wind as the gang filed toward him, led by Chaplain Tim, past the makeshift obstacle course he'd thrown together and wearing dubious expressions he probably mirrored. He quickly schooled his features to hopefully resemble confidence. This would go well. How could it not?
“Another obstacle course? The other one looked harder.” Cody's voice carried on the breeze and held two parts bravado, one part trepidation. He'd struggled on the rope swing of the first obstacle course, which had set him and Jarvis at each otherâno wonder he'd be wary about this one, even if by all appearances it seemed a huge step down on the difficulty factor.
But the teens didn't know yet they'd be doing this one blindfolded.
“It was only hard for you.” Jarvis snorted under his breath as he drew near, and Max shot him a warning look that wilted his arrogant expression. No way was that getting started today. In fact...Max grinned as he glanced at the red bandanas waiting on one of the folding chairs.
He knew who Cody's partner would be.
Emma brought up the rear of the group with the girls, who Caley had brought to him in the barn earlier that morning. Stacy and Katie had acted a little odd, but he figured it was just for getting busted for lingering in the dorm after breakfast instead of coming out to do chores. Tonya had gone right to work, even volunteering to soap saddles, the one chore the girls especially hated because of getting the polish under their nails. Despite her eagerness, he'd still have to handle the girls' disobedience eventually, once he decided which punishment fit the crime. Maybe he'd ask Emma for her suggestions.
But in spite of his attempts to catch her eye, she remained fixated on the girls, as though afraid they'd disappear if she didn't stare directly at them. He frowned. Weird. Something was definitely going on, and judging by Emma's pale expression, he might have more discipline coming up than he'd thought.
Time for that later. Right now he had a horde of teens to blindfold and attempt to teach about trust.
“Line up.” He motioned for the guys to take one line and the girls another, then realized the girls were unevenly numbered. Who would sit out? Unless Emma took a spot.
He made a quick decision. “Stacy and Katie, you're partners. Grab a blindfold. Emma and Tonya, you two will pair up.” He raised his eyebrows at Emma, and after a quick wince, she nodded. He hated to put her through the paces with the teens, but the girls couldn't miss it and he had no reason to keep one of them out. They needed the experience.
“David and Ashton.” He motioned for them to take their blindfolds. “Jarvis and Cody.”
He heard Emma's gasp before her gaze landed on him, probably in an attempt to shoot some sort of fire. Well, maybe he deserved it, because it did seem mean on the surface. But he'd been doing this a long time, and Emma had to trust him.
Too bad she couldn't just fall off a chair, let him catch her and be done with it.
Jarvis's and Cody's protests mingled, but he waved them off and continued assigning partners. Grumbles permeated the group. Good, that must mean he was on the right track. What was the point in learning to trust someone you were already buddy-buddy with?
He let Stacy and Katie go first through the obstacle course, Stacy blindfolded, which she clearly hated, and Katie leading her, which she clearly loved. They managed to get through the maze of cones, chairs and low-slung ropes with only one or two banged knees. The guys went next, teasing each other and not taking it as seriously as Max hoped.