Love Inspired January 2016, Box Set 1 of 2 (14 page)

“Money. Hundreds of dollars.” She did a quick calculation, flicking through the bills. “Nearest I can tell it's close to about ten thousand dollars.”

Adrenaline mixed with fear shot through her veins. How had this person known about her dream? How had he tracked her down here?

“This creeps me out,” Chloe said, pushing the money away from her as if it might contaminate her.

“No kidding. But you know you can't keep the money.”

“I don't even want it,” Chloe said, staring at the pile of bills, her arms wrapped around her legs. “Who could have known about this?”

“Grady?”

“I doubt he would resort to this,” Chloe said.

“I think you're right. But like I said, you have to give the money up. Carson has called an unexpected meeting of the cowboy league this Saturday. Grady will have to sit in as Ben's replacement. You could give the money to him to give to me then.”

“Sure. I can do that.” She could give it to Mamie, she figured. Mamie could hand it over. She didn't want to face Grady. Not if she could avoid it.

“By the way, how is that handsome soldier?”

Lucy's innocent question created an ache in Chloe's heart.

“He's...he's...good.”

“Good? Be still my heart. That's all you can say about the guy you've loved since grade school?”

Chloe drew in a slow breath, trying to stay on top of her scattered emotions. She didn't want this taking over her life. “I don't want to talk about him.”

A beat of silence greeted that statement. “Since when? I know you're attracted to him. You two just spent three days all secluded from the outside world with only an older woman and a baby. Don't tell me that something didn't happen?”

“Something did.” The comment burst out of her, the need to share what she was dealing with overcoming her natural reticence. So she told Lucy, “He kissed me. I kissed him.”

“What? That's amazing. I'm so happy for you.”

Her enthusiasm was like salt on the wound.

“So things are moving forward?” Lucy continued. “I know you've always liked him.”

“I have. I do.” She released a short laugh. “I've never cared for anyone the way I care for Grady. And I thought things were getting somewhere.”

“Thought? What happened?”

Chloe cradled her stomach with her arm, as if assuring her baby of her love. “He made a comment about kids. How glad he was that Cody wasn't his. That he couldn't think about starting a relationship with the responsibility of a child.”

“So why is that a problem?”

Chloe looked down at her stomach, and in spite of everything that had happened the past while, she felt a smile curve her lips. Life was growing inside her. A baby was developing. Flesh of her flesh.

She knew she could keep the secret no longer.

“I'm pregnant. That's the problem.”

Another time Lucy's gasp would have created a surge of shame, but Chloe couldn't allow that to happen. She was this child's mother. Its first line of defense.

You and me against the world
, she thought.

“Jeremy is the father,” she continued.

“Oh, Chloe...”

“And once we got divorced, he ducked out. Haven't heard anything from him, and I don't know where he is. Part of me doesn't want him in my child's life, but the fact that he would abandon us like that makes me so furious.”

“Oh, sweetie,” Lucy murmured. “I wish you would have told me sooner.”

“I was ashamed at first, and I wasn't sure exactly how to tell you.”

“I wish I could come over.”

“No. It's fine. You're busy enough with everything that's been going on.”

Lucy's tired sigh underlined Chloe's assumption. “I am. It's taking over my life, and people are starting to ask for my badge. I just wish I could crack this thing.”

“You will. You just need one good break.”

“Is that a pun?”

Chloe chuckled. “Not intentional.”

“Good to hear you laughing. As for Grady—”

“Like I said, I don't want to talk about him. He also has a lot going on in his life. He doesn't need the complication of a pregnant woman.”

“I know he cares for you,” Lucy said. “You should tell him about the baby.”

“I can't. I heard what he said, and I can't face any kind of rejection from him.” The thought of his turning away from her thickened her throat.

“Are you leaving the ranch?”

“I can't yet. Cody has had too many disruptions in his little life.”

“But if you and Grady—”

“I'll be fine,” Chloe interrupted. “I just have to focus on my baby and do my job.”

But even as she spoke those brave words, Chloe knew it would be much, much harder than that.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

“S
orry I didn't come sooner.” Grady settled himself in the chair beside his brother's bed, wincing as pain seized him, almost making him spill the cup of coffee he had bought for himself before coming up. Once again he felt sympathy for his father. How had he dealt with his pain day in and day out?

And, even harder, how had he faced their mother's rejection of him?

“It took me longer than usual to get here,” Grady said. “Stubborn. Wanted to prove I could do this on my own, so I drove myself.”

His leg still throbbed from being in one position so long. Thankfully his brother's truck had an automatic transmission. No clutch.

He had hoped to duck out without telling his grandmother he was going on his own, but she'd caught him before he left and handed him a thick, heavy envelope full of cash. Told him Chloe had received it and he had to give it over to the league. Thankfully she had said nothing about him driving to town.

But the envelope had bothered him. Chloe couldn't even be bothered to give it to him in person.

“We got stuck up at the ranch the past few days,” he continued. “Freak snowstorm. Shut everything down.”

He watched his brother closely, hoping, praying for even the slightest acknowledgment. The nurses had told him that Ben's eyes had opened again this morning, but now his brother lay perfectly still.

“Started doing some therapy, though I've skipped the past few days.”

He had wondered how much good it would do. He could feel that he was stiffer today. But Chloe had been studiously avoiding him and hadn't said anything about therapy, and he wasn't about to ask, even though it was one of the reasons his grandmother had hired her.

“But the weather's turned, so that's good,” he said to Ben as he shifted his position on the chair, trying to get comfortable. “Sun's shining and the snow is melting. It's a bluebird sky out there.”

It was ironic that while storms blew around his house, he had felt more serene and at peace than he had at most any other time in his life.

Because of Chloe.

Now that the sun was shining in a tranquil blue sky, his heart felt tossed and beaten and battered.

Because of Chloe. Who couldn't even be bothered to give him that lousy envelope in person.

“There's supposed to be another storm front blowing in. At least according to the forecaster. I sure hope not. The yard is still a sheet of ice, and I'm worried about the horses.” He paused to take a sip of coffee, surprised at how much easier it was to talk to his brother now. Especially sitting here alone with no one waiting or hovering. Just him and Ben.

And because he was alone, he felt he had the space to tell his brother the things weighing like a rock on his mind since their last meeting. “I don't want to just talk about the weather,” he said, looking down at his coffee cup, pulling together his apology. “I want to say again how sorry I am over how I left things between us before I left for this last tour. I'm sorry I was angry with you. You had a lot to deal with after I left. I had no right to be so self-righteous. I left you behind to deal with Dad and the ranch. I thought I was being all brave and heroic and honorable, but you were the brave and honorable one. You were the one who kept things going. I left you to do it alone and then judged how you did it. You're still my brother and I love you.”

He stopped there, as if to let his confession settle somewhere in Ben's mind.

A cart pushed by a lab tech clattered past. Nurses at the station laughed at something.

Life flowed on regardless of the macro and micro tragedies of the world.

“I know that you're the easygoing one and I'm the worrier, so I should tell you that, as usual, I'm worried again. My leg doesn't seem to be getting any better and it hurts. A lot. Made me think of Dad and how hard it was to live with him.”

Grady set his coffee aside, leaned forward in his chair. On a whim he took Ben's hand in his, surprised at how warm it felt. Still a horseman's hands with scars and rope burns and calluses.

“Remember how angry he got that time we took his truck out on the hayfield with some friends, burning doughnuts and acting like idiots? Fourteen years old and we had the world by the tail. Good thing Mom intervened or we would have been in worse trouble.” He laughed lightly at the memory.

“I miss her, though I still get ticked at her for leaving Dad. I know he wasn't the easiest to live with, but I'm finally getting how hard it was for him. It's hard not to feel like less of a man when you can't do what you used to.”

He stopped there, his own emotions suddenly in flux as he thought of Chloe. He felt his heart shift, shook his head and carried on.

“A couple of days ago I fell. It was bad enough to be sprawled out on the ice looking like some spavined mule, but it had to happen in front of Chloe. Yeah, the same Chloe who came here the last time. She's at the ranch now taking care of Cody and supposedly doing therapy with me, though she hasn't the past few days.”

He stopped again, frustrated at how close his emotions were to the surface.

“I think she's given up because she saw what a hopeless case I am. Like Mom, after spending enough time with me she must realize I'm not getting better. That I'm this crippled man who has little to offer someone as wonderful as her.” To his dismay, his voice broke.

“Listen to me,” he said, adding a short laugh. “I've seen so much pain and sorrow overseas and here I am feeling sorry for myself over the loss of a woman. Trouble is this isn't just any woman. This is Chloe. Now, I know I've never been as good with girls as you have, so it might sound kind of pathetic to you, but I don't know what to do. I don't want to end up like Dad. I don't want her to be disappointed in me. I feel as if I've had something special, and now I don't know what happened to it.”

He stopped there, feeling as if he had said too much. Opened himself too wide. Made himself too vulnerable.

Then he caught himself. What did it matter?

He bent his head, feeling as though he had hit the bottom.

And he knew what he had to do.

He held Ben's hand between his, bent his head and closed his eyes.

“I know I'm proud, Lord. I know that too often I want to do things on my own. But I'm facing big things that I can't fix. I can't push through with my will or my strength. You'd think I would have learned that overseas. I care for Chloe and I want what's best for her, but I can't make her love me. Take care of her. Watch over her. Be with my brother, as well.”

He said amen, and stayed with his head bent a moment.

Then Ben's hand twitched in his. A slight movement, but a movement nonetheless.

He squeezed Ben's hand back and his heart dropped when Ben's hand moved again. Grady's eyes flew to Ben's face and to his amazement he saw Ben's eyelids drift upward. It was agonizing to watch. His lids fell shut again, but then once more, they slowly lifted. Ben blinked, then again and his head turned toward Grady. His hand twitched in Grady's again, then his fingers tightened for the briefest of moments.

Was that a smile?

Grady felt his heart quicken.

“Ben. Can you hear me? Squeeze my hand if you can hear me.”

Ben's hand tightened briefly, then fell limp in his and his eyes closed again, and once again he lay still and unmoving.

Grady stood, watching, waiting for a few more minutes, but there was no more movement on Ben's part.

His heart filled with a mixture of expectation and disappointment.

What did he expect, that Ben would sit up and start talking?

Grady knew better than that, but even so it was a start. A tiny ray of blessing on a week that had been darkness and loneliness.

Fifteen minutes later he was on his way to a hastily called meeting of the Lone Star Cowboy League, his heart feeling just a bit lighter. As Ben's brother and a Stillwater, Grady had been elected to take his brother's place.

A number of vehicles were parked in front of the league building when he arrived. It looked as if most everyone was inside. With a grimace, Grady got out of the truck, pulled the hated crutch from behind the seat, locked his truck and hobbled up the snow-covered path to the door. Inside, he was greeted by the sound of angry voices, one of them Byron's.

Grady wasn't looking forward to this meeting. Though he had been back for a while now, he hadn't had much to do with the community as a whole, other than attending church on Sunday. The questions surrounding Cody's parenthood still seemed to cling to him, even though almost everyone should have known by now that the allegations were false. Vanessa was long gone and her accusations with her.

Nonetheless he took a deep breath, sent up a prayer for patience and walked into the building.

“Well, hello, Grady.” Ingrid Edwards, the secretary of the league, sat at the desk by the entrance to the boardroom, her red hair hanging loose around her face. She pushed her glasses up her nose and got up, her hand out as if to help him. “I'm glad you're taking Ben's place.”

“I hope I'm up to it,” he said, taking a step away from her.

“So sad what happened to him.” Ingrid gave him a shy smile. “And I was sorry to hear about your injury, too. That must have been so hard for you! Do you need a hand? I can hold your crutch while you take your coat off.”

“I'm fine,” Grady said, a little more gruffly than he should have. Ingrid meant well; she just wasn't the most tactful person.

It was just that her view of him seemed to underline how he felt about himself. And how he was sure Chloe saw him.

Carson was standing in one corner of the room chatting with Lucy, who wore blue jeans and a faded denim shirt today, giving her a more approachable look than her uniform did. But this was negated by the frown beneath her blond fringe of hair.

Byron sat at the table, bent over some papers, glowering at whatever it was he was reading.

Carson looked up as Grady came in.

Was he imagining the look of pity on his face?

Grady knew he was being oversensitive.

“Well, the war hero is here,” Byron said, getting up. “Mighty proud of you, son. You are a credit to our community.”

Grady grew uncomfortable with the man's obvious bluster, and his discomfort only increased when Byron pulled a chair out for him.

“Here. Let me help you.”

Why did everyone seem to think he was so helpless?

Maybe because he was, he thought, remembering his ungainly fall the other day.

“I can manage,” Grady said, shaking off Byron's hand on his arm.

Then Lucy saw him and waved him over. “Grady. I need to talk to you.”

“Excuse me,” Grady said to Byron, who was frowning at him, obviously displeased that Grady had refused his help. But Grady wasn't about to try to soothe the man's ruffled feathers.

He made his way around the chairs to where Lucy stood, suspecting she wanted to discuss the thick envelope Chloe had left on the counter for him to pass on to Lucy. She was still avoiding him, and his grandmother was still trying to find out what had happened, but Grady didn't want to talk about it.

“Grady, good to see you here,” Carson said, holding out his hand in greeting. “Though the reason you are here is less than ideal. How is Ben?”

Grady shook Carson's hand then shrugged. “Actually, there is some small improvement. Very small, but the doctor assured me he is moving in the right direction.”

“We'll continue to pray for him,” Carson said, giving Grady a tight smile. Then he turned back to Lucy. “I need to talk to Ingrid before we get started. Will you excuse me, please?”

Lucy nodded, waiting until Carson was out of earshot. She moved to the far corner of the room, turning so that her back was to the room. “Do you have the envelope?”

“Locked in my truck.”

“Good. I'll have to present this to the meeting. Are you okay with that?”

“Yes. Why wouldn't I be?”

“It's just that the money came to Chloe while she was on your ranch. And Maddy, who also works at the Stillwater ranch, got some gifts, as well. Add that to the fact that you still haven't noticed anything missing...” She let the sentence hang as if expecting Grady to finish it.

He pushed down his anger at her unspoken suspicions, knowing she was simply doing her job. “I have no idea why we haven't been hit and people on our ranch have been getting things,” he said. “Unless you suspect someone on the ranch.”

Lucy blew out her breath, shooting another glance backward as if checking to see who might be listening in, but Byron had left the room as well, leaving the two of them alone.

“I don't suspect any of your employees, but you have to admit, it does seem odd that you haven't had anything stolen. I feel as if there's a connection, but I can't figure it out yet.” She was silent, but Grady didn't add anything to her suspicions. He knew Josh, Emilio and Lucas couldn't possibly have anything to do with what had been going on. He trusted those men implicitly. As for the girls, he knew beyond a doubt they weren't involved.

“And how was your visit with Ben?” she asked.

“Like I said, very positive. I'm tempted to tell him a couple of lies, hoping he will try to wake up to set me straight.”

Lucy gave him a sympathetic look. “But it's a good sign.”

Grady nodded. “A very good sign.”

“Chloe seems optimistic about your recovery, as well,” Lucy said.

Even hearing her name hurt.

“We're not talking about...that.”

Lucy bit her lip, looking back over her shoulder again at the empty room. She took a few steps closer and lowered her voice.

“So what happened with you and Chloe? I thought you two were getting somewhere?”

Grady pulled back, frowning at Lucy.

“Oh, don't get all ‘mind your own business' on me,” Lucy chided. “I talk to Chloe all the time. One minute she's all sappy and moony, the next she's weepy and miserable. What did you do to her?”