Love Is Overdue (29 page)

I nodded silently, gazing out at the
group, noticing that even though they were in immediate proximity
to one another, Ben and his brother avoided each other like the
plague. Almost like an unspoken rule between them.

Geneva was making her way over to us
then. From up close I was even more taken by her beauty. She was
the female version of Ben – I saw so many similarities, from the
dark chocolate colouring to those deep set eyes, high cheekbones,
that bright white smile…

Sally pulled her attention over first.
“Neva, honey, this is Gabriela – a friend of your brother’s,” she
introduced me easily.

I noticed Geneva’s eyes go wide for a
moment in surprise but she smiled back at me. “Pleased to meet you,
Gabriela, my name is Geneva.” She took my hand and we shook. Her
voice came out all smoothe and deep, without a trace of accent.
Elegant. Like a television reporter.

I smiled politely, not finding my
words. “Hi…” I finally managed.

“
I’m assuming you mean Ben
right?” She nodded over at him then, taking a guess on the brother
in question.

At the mention of his name, Ben turned
and addressed his sister casually. “Whassup, Neva?” He draped his
arm around her shoulders and gave a little squeeze.

“
Whassup yourself?” She
eyed him suspiciously. “You’re leaving poor Sally over here to make
all your introductions for you,” she added, nodding in my
direction.

He sighed. “Yeah, I know, my bad…” He
eyed me and nodded over at Geneva. “Gabriela, this is the queen of
England right here. We don’t bow, though, it makes her
uncomfortable…”

Geneva just rolled her eyes. “You’re
such an asshole.”

“
She’s the mouthy one,
too,” Ben added then. “You’d think it was Kimmie, but this one here
worse…”

Geneva sighed. “And you know you only
say that ‘cause Kimmie could beat your ass with her pinky
fingers.”

Ben laughed at that. “No doubt…” He
didn’t deny it.

Sally shook her head. “You kids play
nice.” She touched my arm affectionately. “It was nice meeting you,
Gabriela.”

“
Yeah, you too, Sally,” I
smiled, turning to her as she walked away.

Ben was in mid-sentence with his
sister. “Y’all go eat yet or what?”

“
Not yet. Too hot,” Geneva
said. “But Winston gonna get hungry soon, I’m sure…” I saw her
glance over to where Sophie and that other little boy were still
playing on the blanket with Aliyah.

“
So you gonna hold down da
fort for me for a while or what?” Ben asked his sister as he nodded
in the direction of the family. “Gabby and I are gonna bounce for a
bit.”

We were?

Geneva’s eyes went wide. “You serious,
Ben? You just got here!”

“
I know, don’t worry – I’ll
leave you my kid, so I’ll have to come back,” he teased
her.

“
Wow…” She shook her head
dramatically. “You give an inch and look what happens,” she
muttered, narrowing her eyes at her brother. “You comin’ to
Winston’s party next weekend, right?”

Ben looked momentarily confused. “What
day is it again?”

“
I sent you an e-vite! Can
you believe this guy?” She turned to me for support, and then
turned back to Ben.

“
E-vite?” Ben sucked his
teeth. “What the fuck is an e-vite?”

Geneva rolled her eyes. “Sunday. Check
your email,” she ordered.

Ben smiled
apologetically. “Will do. Thanks sis.” He gave her a little kiss on
her forehead.

Ω

“
That was fast,” I said, as
soon as we were out of earshot and making our way back down the
hill.

“
Yeah, I know, I just wanna
go check on things by the food truck,” Ben dismissed it.

I sighed,
glancing over at him out of the corner of my eye, starting to get a
feeling that Ben tended to avoid his family on a regular basis. I
guess Angela had been right.

“
Well, thanks for not
deserting me over there, I appreciate it.”

Ben gave me a little sideways glance.
“You’re welcome,” he said, in all seriousness.

I laughed. “That was a joke. Your
family’s awesome. Your sister…your step-mom…she seems really nice,
by the way…”

Ben smiled. “She is,” he agreed.
“She’s great…she’s my white mother,” he joked, laughing
softly.

I smiled at that. “I can’t believe you
never told me about her – or your step-sisters either!”

“
Really? Why is
that?”

“
What do you mean, ‘why is
that’? I mean, from what Sally was saying they are a big part of
your life…” My voice trailed off as I thought of my mother. I
thought of how I had to take care of my mother, and how Sally would
most likely need to take care of Aliyah her entire life. “I don’t
know, I guess I just thought with everything I was going through
with my mom that maybe…I don’t know…you would have told me about
Aliyah. I mean, it’s not the same thing, but…” I paused and glanced
over at Ben.

“
Well…” He looked to be
thinking as well. “You’re right. Maybe that’s why…because it’s not
the same thing. Ali isn’t sick, Ali’s just…she’s just different,
that’s all…I mean, she has a job and she lives on her own…she has a
transit pass – the girl’s actually got it under control, y’know,
she’s pretty independent, so…I guess I didn’t see the comparison.”
He thought for a moment. “I worry about you, though.”

I nodded slowly. “I know.”

Ben was quiet for a moment. The music
from the mainstage started up again and Morgan Heritage’s ‘Down by
the River’ started up to some loud cheers.

“
You figure out what you
need to talk about once your brother gets here?” Ben asked then,
pulling my thoughts from the music.

“
That is –
if
he comes,” I reminded him. “But no,
not really.”

Ben sighed. I took a lot of comfort in
how much he seemed to care about me. I just wasn’t sure if it would
last…if it could ever be enough...

“
Well, you gotta figure
that shit out, Gabriela,” he said seriously. “‘Cause your place
ain’t got no ramp, and you know what the doctors told you,
so…”

I nodded again, remembering. With a
broken hip, my mother would never walk again. When she finally was
released from the hospital, she’d be in a wheelchair on a permanent
basis.

“
You’re gonna have to
move.” Now he was just stating the obvious to me.

“
I know, I know…” My mind
was racing. “Ben?” I looked at him. “I don’t want to talk about
this right now.”

Ben narrowed his eyes at me, watching
me, studying me. Then he sucked his teeth. “Stubborn lady,” he said
softly, reaching out and pushing a curl from my face.

“
No,” I sighed. “I’m just
having a nice time, so…”

“
So…you’re being dismissive
about your problems because we all know as soon as you stop
thinking about something it just magically goes away.” He raised
his eyebrows at me. “I don’t know why I never thought of
that…”

I just rolled my eyes. “Always the
comedian,” I teased, repeating his step-mother’s words.

“
Yeah, but…” He was
thinking again. “Let’s say I was able to help you…”

I gave him a strange look. “Help me
how?”

We were approaching the gate that
blocked the entrance behind the food trucks. The noise from the
crowds and the music was getting louder. The line-ups had grown.
Ben pulled me over against the fence and turned to face
me.

“
Help you with your living
situation.”

I raised my eyebrows. “How you gonna
do that?” I wanted to know. “Do you own a vacant apartment with an
elevator?”

He smiled at that. “No, but…” He
paused, watching me for a moment. “I could get you out of your
lease.”

My eyes went wide. I was completely
confused. “What are you talking about?”

“
Well, I was thinking about
what you told me…about that apartment your aunt found…”

I shook my head. “Ben, that’s
impossible. It’s for August first, that’s like a week away, I told
you all this…”

“
It still
available?”

“
I don’t know…” My mind was
racing. “Maybe…I’m confused.”

Ben sighed. “Awright, listen.” He
focused his gaze directly on mine. “I wanna help you. And I been
thinking a lot about this and I was planning to tell you this later
but…change of plans. You need to take that apartment, and if that
one’s not available, you need to find another one…for the first of
the month.”

I was still terribly confused. “But I
can’t, you know this. Our lease isn’t up for another six months and
there’s no way I could find anyone to sublet in a week, come up
with the security, pack, move…” I was getting a head
ache.

Ben sighed again. “Yeah, I know you
can’t,” he said. “But you don’t have to…that’s what am trying to
tell you.”

I stared back at him, still unsure
what he was getting at.

“
You just have to get
yourself the new place, Gabriela, and I’ll take care of the old
one.”

I stared back at him in shock.
“Meaning what?”

Ben sucked his teeth then, looking a
bit frustrated with my inability to catch on. “Meaning I’ll cover
you till you find a sublet. Make sense?”

“
What?” My jaw dropped.
“Ben, that’s crazy! I can’t take your money.”

That made him smile – just slightly.
“I’m not giving you my money.”

“
You know what I
mean.”

“
They could clear your mom
to go home any day now – then what you gonna do?” he challenged
me.

He was right. I knew it. I would be
fucked.

“
You do it this way, baby,
you have a place for her whenever that time comes, and the beauty
of it is you can move in slowly – take your time and do shit
right,” Ben said. “Unless you got a better plan.”

I didn’t. I had no plan.

“
Well...I told you, I was
gonna talk to Laz when he gets here,” I said,
pathetically.

“
Well, that’s great – if
your brother wants to pay for it after you talk to him, no problem,
we consider it a loan, it don’t matter to me,” Ben said simply.
“But whether or not that happen doesn’t really change anything – am
doing this for you.”

“
Yeah, but…” I didn’t know
what to say. My heart was racing so fast and my head was spinning
in circles. “It’s too much.” My voice came out in barely a whisper.
It was all I could manage. “I don’t know what to say.”

Ben sucked his teeth, smiling, and
reached out and stroked my cheek with his thumb. “Just say thank
you,” he said, as if it was all just that simple. “I mean, it’s one
thing not to ask for help when you need it, but to turn it down
when it’s offered? That’s just fuckin’ stupid. For real. No
offence, baby.”

I met his eyes then, glaring back at
him. It was just like Ben to throw out an insult to break the
tension.

“
So…” he started slowly,
“I’m gonna go check on my crew…wait for me here?” He raised his
eyebrows in that heart-stopping way of his.

I nodded slowly, silently.

He smiled, reached out and held my
face as he leaned over and gave me the sweetest, softest, tastiest
little kiss on my mouth – making my heart race and my knees wobble,
all in the same nanosecond.

Ω

I
took those brief minutes alone to let Ben’s spontaneous,
mind-blowingly generous offer to sink in. I found a tree stump near
the chain-link fence and sat down in relative seclusion and pulled
out a cigarette. Smoke and think. It always seemed to be my first
go-to, although a lot of the time I realized it was really just a
vice – a distraction. Then again, it almost seemed like everything
in my life at the moment was just serving as a major distraction.
Taking care of my mother, making sure we functioned on a day-to-day
basis, that we paid our bills, had a roof over our head and made it
through to the next month was just what I did. The future…planning
ahead…focusing on the bigger picture – that just wasn’t a part of
my reality. It never had been. We didn’t
save
. We didn’t
set aside anything for a rainy day. In our world it just didn’t
rain – ever. My mother’s disability cheque barely paid for
groceries and transportation. My pay cheque was everything –
without it we wouldn’t get from one month to the next. I bought my
make-up at the drug store and shopped for household deals at the
dollar store. I bought my clothes in thrift stores and vintage
boutiques. And any given day my mother would be discharged from the
hospital and I would have nowhere to take her. And in the wake of
all that, I instead just thought about everything else.

My head was spinning. I couldn’t take
Ben’s money. It was too much. Our rent was nearly $1200 a month –
and what if I couldn’t sublet immediately? The amount would just
double, triple, quadruple…and to what end? I knew Ben had money,
and maybe it wasn’t a lot of money to him, but how could I ever
repay it? How could I indebt myself to him to that degree before I
even knew the status of our relationship? It was too crazy to
consider.